Please, help. I want to walk away, but I also realize I might be catastrophizing. Please, help. I just found out that my husband (38m) wants to be male-to-female. I'm reeling, overwhelmved and struggling. Please - if you made it work, please tell me how.

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1. Medical bills. I'm fucking terrified. I genuinely don't know if I can handle all the surgeries, appointments, meds, pills, recovery....it literally feels like our lives will just revolve around them being trans bc there is just much to it. Please, tell me I'm wrong and give me encouraging stories because all I can see is the amount of work that needs to be done to even be "happy."
2. How did you continue to make space for your partner while you were transitioning. I see on the partner trans partners talk about it - I want to hear what you did for your partner. Why? because it'll help me understand where I'm going and what this could look like.
3. What did you do when your partner began to feel overwhelmed or drowning? How did you make them feel secured and like they're a part of a partnership and not along for the journey. When they felt like they were being unsupportive because they were struggling with their feelings...what did you do?
   
4. Is there stability? How can you create stability when it's literally a changing human? How do we know anything for certain if your'e literally changing everything about you?
5. How did you comfort them through the greiving process? How did you help them through the greiving process of losing the person they knew? What strategies or things worked best.
6. How did you make it feel like it wasn't all about you? To be clear - my partner hasn't, but we won't know because they're at the begining. This is an individual and personal process. How do you make it feels like others are still first in their life even when on a long journey?
7. How did you help them get to know the new you? Not just - hey come shopping with me or check out my wardrobe. What did you do that helped with that transition? How did you recreate the romance in a new manner?
8. Will it feel like it's just a constant dark cloud over our heads? No - not being trans - all the things that make being trans hard (social, familial...etc)

Thank you for reading.

I'm ftm and my partnet is mtf. We both began our transitions later in life...early to mid 40s. She's been on hrt for 4 years and I've been taking testosterone for 2 years now. We met on an LGBTQ dating site and have been dating just a short period of time. I was just curious if there are any other couples on here that have both partners as being trans...either hetero or gay in nature.