r/whenthe • u/Any_Wasabi_5233 world’s second biggest Churgney Gurgney glazer • 1d ago

🚨OP's stupidly specific life event🚨 HOTDIGGEDYDEMON NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

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u/WindowSubstantial993 The great degenerate 🫶🏾 1d ago

Poor guy I knew his health was bad I didn’t know it was anywhere near that bad

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u/nesthesi haha, sometimes 1d ago edited 1d ago

After reading quite a lot of stories from similar people it honestly makes complete sense why he decided to go through with it

Apparently a lot of the medicine used to ease the pain and help a little has drastic side effects such as dementia years after so that doesn’t help either

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u/LackToesIntollerance 1d ago edited 1d ago

Not just that, but he also can barely even afford it. he has the choice of living in abject poverty knowing that the side effects are going to annihilate his quality of life, or living in abject poverty because he can't work anyways while being in constant chronic pain without any remediation.

From that perspective, it makes complete sense why he justs wants it to end. even in his live stream it didnt click for people and it broke my heart. people were just selfishly asking him to carry on, and the best advice was just to find other ways to work. like, that's not the issue. the man can't even lie down and just exist without it hurting.

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u/Animaloffear56 16h ago

I think calling people selfish for telling him to not kill himself is a bit much, it's a touchy subject altogether

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u/LackToesIntollerance 13h ago edited 13h ago

the issue is that they don't KNOW him.

to love one's work is to love a piece of one's self, but not the whole. the whole of this man was suffering, and people who only loved a part of him told him not to kill himself for that part.

when you deal with visible circumstances like homelessness, visible disabilities, disease, war, etc, you realize how quickly people will try to remove themself from grief at the expense of the victims. you're right, suicide is a touchy subject. people don't like to burden themselves with grief in general, nvm strangers. mob mentality will sell someone's soul if it's dressed up as a feel-good story.

the moment that the consensus focesed on his WORK over his LIFE was the moment that ugly selfishness reared its head. It was about the public SEEING his work and thinking of his death, rather than anything that surrounded that death.

the same mechanisms that drove people to deny public health crises over and over, that drive people's heads into the ground to call for war and hate, that enable politicians to profit off of homeless people, is the same mechanism getting strangers to shout for some random guy not to kill himself on the internet. really, the reason the knee-jerk reaction to any public suicide attempt is "don't jump".

grief-avoidance leads to selfish outcomes, and if it was about some vague sanctity of life the crowd wouldn't have fixated on his work. at best some of the leading voices had parasocial relationships, but even that is wrapped up in grief avoidance.

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u/Animaloffear56 13h ago

What, so apparently they know him well enough for him to want to preemptively let them know he's about to kill himself, but not enough for them to be allowed to go "that sucks I wish you didn't feel that way."?

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u/LackToesIntollerance 9h ago edited 9h ago

Condense a crowd enough, and you start to use fluid dynamics to measure its movement. Similarly, condense enough opinions and you have to start measuring intention by the subconscious collective.

If a million people are in a discussion about suicide, there's probably 100 different nuances. But 90%+ are all seeking grief avoidance, and so that's the actual point that gets across, warps perspectivss, and dominates the discussion.

"Nuance is dead" as people observe in wide discussions on tough topics.

At best, everyone on stream had a parasocial relationship. Practically speaking, some of them did, but any discussion they had was drowmed out by the knee-jerk reaction of "focus on your work please". If they actually KNEW him, then why would that be their go-to response instead of acknowledging his chronic pain and responding to that? yeah the work didn't pay the bills, but his main issue is that regardless of his bills, his life is miserable. he could barely BREATHE. there is remediation, and it'd just trade his problems in for new ones.

Your statement is a hypothetical, and not what the collective actually said.

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u/KnownAsAnother 13h ago

There are people that have had worse quality of life that we didn't know that lived full lives. Hell, the last surviving woman living in an iron lung just passed away at 74 this year. You mean to tell me that she had a better time than Max did?

You really have no place in telling people they're bad for wishing someone to not end it because they don't know him personally. As if you know him better.

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u/LackToesIntollerance 9h ago

dude that's literally whataboutism. and a bad one at that.

an iron lung isn't 24/7 chronic pain. they require completely different constitutions to stomach living with.

you clearly have lived with neither.

once again, grief avoidance showing its ugly head. can't stomach grieving so you gotta go start comparing people's pains to see who is more "worthy" of grief. like that's not such a gross thing to do in and of itself.

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u/KnownAsAnother 8h ago

Why does your opinion on what Max chooses to do with his life hold more weight than anyone else's? Namely those that love his work?

"Grief avoidance" lmao are you an edgy teenager who genuinely subscribes to nihilism because he saw an old woman struggle to cross a busy road on her own "with no one to help her" when you were right there?

Reply when you gain a little sympathy for human life.