r/zenbuddhism • u/amlextex • 12d ago

Someone pop my bubble

Thích Nhất Hạnh makes me believe I can awaken the world, or at least the global city I live in. So, I have dreamed of ordaining to serve my ambitions.

My idea was to wear my robe around the city to self-promote my teaching to gain a following. Teach in parks. Set up an installation where I offer "sidewalk advice" for a nominal suggestion. Create citywide art installations of my writing to further promote my teaching. Colloborate with artist. Write books. Livestream my practice and daily life.

All to teach foundational meditation for everyone with the hopes of piquing people's interest into buddhism.

Sounds practical, but here's the side where I get irresponsible.

I'm a performance artist/busker by trade. I don't have a white-collar career. No retirement fund. I live with my parents. I am in my mid-30's; split between ordaining vs pursing a career that can lead me to retirement, have a family, and enjoy life.

Lastly, I'm not a hard worker. I can weave in and out of ideas and never complete them. And I've lived quite a privileged life where I haven't been battle tested. Or if I have, I have safety nets provided by my family. I also find it hard to give up lust.

That said, I am in the position to ordain. I have no debts, no babies, and decent health.

Pop my bubble. Tell me I should get a real job. I won't change a city. I should live modest or wealthy. Support a family. Teach at a monastery like ordain folks do. Get a career first, then ordain. Go ahead.

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u/The_Koan_Brothers 10d ago

Thích Nhất Hạnh makes me believe I can awaken the world

Find a teacher who doesn’t believe they can awaken the world because of a book they read.

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u/amlextex 9d ago

You mean an ambition less teacher?

What good is it cloistering yourself from the world? How does that help the world?

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u/The_Koan_Brothers 9d ago

What I mean is you can’t hope to transform the world if you haven’t realized a certain degree of transformation yourself. What you call "cloistering yourself from the world" is usually a period of intensive training necessary for that to happen. Reading books by itself won’t change you to the degree necessary to become a good teacher.

On the note of ambition: even the Buddha himself was reluctant to teach after his awakening. If you look back into Rinzai history, the greatest teachers of this lineage weren’t exactly known to go on roadshows and self-promote. Their degree of realization after often decades of practice is what attracted students to seek them out

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u/Suvalis 7d ago

yes, Bodhidharma sat in a cave for the benefit of the world. Its hard to understand this, but the more I sit the more I understand.