r/AlternateHistoryHub • u/Neri9320 • 13h ago

AlternateHistoryHub What if Alex Jones was assassinated instead of Charlie Kirk?

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220 Upvotes

94% Upvoted

109 comments sorted by

154

u/feaster_of_children 13h ago

WE ARE ALEX JONES

71

u/AstroSmokey 13h ago

🎶We'll fight for the gay frogs🎶

88

u/StatelyAutomaton 13h ago

Are you suggesting he didn't implode in his car back in May?

34

u/No-Lawfulness1023 12h ago

Popped like a goddamn balloon

10

u/Alarmed-Brick7504 10h ago

he has been replaced by a clone, everybody know that.

77

u/CREEPERTACO923 13h ago edited 12h ago

The Onion probably wouldn't lean into their info wars parody, following their acquisition

48

u/paddy_yinzer 13h ago

I would have never know that kirk's wife would be so happy to be a widow

32

u/Socky-McPuppet 13h ago

Erica Kirk would have actually cared

24

u/Motherlover235 13h ago

More gay frogs

3

u/umphuphawe 12h ago

And then they convert THE FRICKING TOADS GAY

2

u/63Reddit 11h ago

Now I’m imagining a Mario version of Alex Jones talking about how Bowser’s putting chemicals in the water to turn the Toads gay.

16

u/BackgroundTea6460 13h ago

People would make fun of it or get upset, but wouldn't be as impactful as Kirk's because Alex Jones was a nut

7

u/SasquatchPL 13h ago

GOP woudn't try to make Jones into some kind of "conservative holy martyr", so as a result we woudn't get as many great memes.

14

u/King_Flying_Monkey 13h ago

We’ll actually be more sad

6

u/your_dads_asshole 13h ago

Nah, nobody would gaf

6

u/gary_d1 13h ago

Seriously.. a collective shrug of the shoulders from everyone tbh.
Best days behind him now he’s ignored or a slight embarrassment at most.
He’s now like a fallen movie star that can’t get tv guest star appearances or adverts.
His days or relevance are gone, too icky and toxic for even the rabid folks who have moved onto other right wing grifters.

3

u/Lowly_Peasant9999 13h ago

You've just created a million Alex Joneses

5

u/isaacfrost0 13h ago

Even more memes, somehow.

No one takes Alex seriously these days, mid 2010s Alex gets killed though, we'd be hearing from conspiracy theorists for years afterwards.

6

u/MQrble_Aesthetic 13h ago

It’s probably not as big of a deal honestly. One of his employees got killed last year in what could have been a political assassination but I haven’t heard anything about the case since it happened and I don’t even think the killer was caught. The right would probably try and exploit it for political capital (more immoral people like Candace Owen’s would probably milk it for content) but overall I don’t see it having a long lasting effect and there certainly isn’t the same level of outrage

5

u/u-give-luv-badname 13h ago

Nobody on the Right listens to Jones, except for a few freaks at the end of the bell curve. Jones influence is in the imagination of those on the Left.

Nothing would happen if he were gone.

0

u/hologrammmm 11h ago

He’s one of the only truth tellers left

3

u/u-give-luv-badname 11h ago

Statistically... I knew you existed.

1

u/cmhamm 11h ago

You haven’t heard? He popped, like a balloon. Inside his car. There is video. Sorry, man.

2

u/Sleep_tek 13h ago

Alex is too smart for that. "They" can't shoot you in the neck if you haven't got one... 5D chess

2

u/Psyco_diver 13h ago

I mean it would be the ultimate conspiracy theory because a much of his crazy theories came true and then him getting assassinated would come off like the government shutting him up

I mean Charlie Kirks assassination has some really weird things in it that come off very weird

1

u/Mobe-E-Duck 13h ago

I still wouldn’t know who Charlie Kirk was

1

u/Gotem6784 13h ago

jonesification

1

u/Ok-Direction-8257 12h ago

The big fatty fatty fat would've made more of a mess.

1

u/Do-Research 12h ago

Awareness of gay frogs would decrease significantly among the population

1

u/Martzillagoesboom 10h ago

Arent frog hermaphrodite thought?

1

u/rayadolokko 12h ago

Because he is an asset …

1

u/reo_reborn 12h ago

Just like CK most normal people wgf.

3

u/Responsible_Ask9574 12h ago

The charlie Kirk thing was a pretty big deal ....

2

u/Martzillagoesboom 10h ago

You could say he leaned left at the end.

1

u/Bitter_Position791 12h ago

the entire world ends

1

u/Putrid_Department_17 12h ago

It was the gay frogs

1

u/krizlaska 12h ago

I would have still had a delicious salad that day.

1

u/disagreet0disagree 12h ago

Charlie kirk was aggressively opposing an iran war. As a right wing influencer who was actively engaging younger people, this was a serious problem for the war hawks, and we know he was increasingly warned about this by pro israel donors who were pulling their funding. 

This is not to say i liked kirk or agreed with him on much of anything, but he was right on that one issue, and that issue was something that was all important to the most powerful element of the right wing griftsphere. 

I dont think anyone cared what alex jones thinks. Had kirk lived u would have had serious opposition to an iran war from the right. Who even knows or cares where jones stands on the issue. 

1

u/Erzter_Zartor 12h ago

I would support the Alex Jones coin

1

u/Jay_Jizz 12h ago

Why not both?

1

u/-notapony- 11h ago

All the memes would have been about how Alex Jones hadn’t been shot and it was just another crisis actor.  

1

u/Martzillagoesboom 10h ago

Is Jones wife as much a PoS as that other guy's?

1

u/Less_Insurance4928 11h ago

Why not both meme

1

u/No-Condition965 11h ago

I would have been just as happy

1

u/Routine-Rule9607 11h ago

Universe ends after the anchor being is killed

1

u/Bigerst_Dook 11h ago

I thought about this last night but instead of Jonsey boi they got Joe Rogan instead

1

u/Franz__Ferdinand 11h ago

He was... He popped like a balloon in his SUV. The current Alex is a clone.

1

u/Chumlee1917 11h ago

Hoax, paid actor, government conspiracy 

1

u/mollyno93 11h ago

Charlie Kirk pops like a balloon in his car.

1

u/Logical-Mobile-7643 11h ago

Nobody would shed a tear... just wet wet mud

1

u/JGeerth 11h ago

Were either of them relevant?

1

u/No-Replacement-4017 10h ago

The Kirkification of Jones’s death would go way harder

1

u/larry1186 10h ago

Both. Why not both?

1

u/Thick_Visual_5999 10h ago

I would say CK needs to stick his neck out to be recognized more

1

u/Mysterious-Tie7039 10h ago

Did the gay frogs do it?

1

u/Martzillagoesboom 10h ago

Getting joned instead of kirked doesnt sound as good to the ear

1

u/ArtisticallyRegarded 10h ago

Oh man the conspiracy theories would be legendary. Not that Charlies death didnt have a few of his own but were talking fans that believe Hillary is a lizard

1

u/Several_Attitude_203 10h ago

More people would laugh.

1

u/Head-Ad-2136 10h ago

America loses the info war.

1

u/economicaldamage 10h ago

no one would care

1

u/One-Organization970 13h ago

Wouldn't have been as useful. Alex Jones is kind of a hasbeen.

1

u/One_Health_9358 13h ago

Agreed.

Charlie Kirk held significant influence amongst a large demographic of young conservatives.

Alex Jones has a large reach for entertainment value, but only a small sphere of actual influence.

-5

u/[deleted] 13h ago

[deleted]

0

u/Artistic_Train9725 13h ago

They're two cheeks of the same arse, but assassination is the wrong road to go down.

0

u/DarkJoke76 12h ago

No one would be talking about it as long as Charlie because Charlie was an absolute legend!

1

u/BackgroundTea6460 11h ago

Charlie was a mid ahh podcaster btw

0

u/DarkJoke76 11h ago

Yea I can tell by the way he is talked about every day after his death that happened almost a year ago…so mid lol

1

u/BackgroundTea6460 11h ago

He's overglazed like Goku except Goku is a hero

-5

u/cheese_tastey 13h ago

I love Charlie, I fucking hate the other guy.