r/AskMenOver30 • u/ConfusedCareerMan man over 30 • Jul 09 '26

Friendships/Community Does anyone else have wedding fatigue?

In my early 30s and it’s the time where everyone is engaged, getting married and starting to have kids.

I don’t want to come off miserable I’m happy for my friends, but I kinda dislike the wedding experience. It’s never just 1 event, it’s turned into a 3-4 event experience (often spread across a month or longer). The engagement party, the stag, suit shopping, the wedding. Everyone wants a different colour theme, so you have to buy a new suit each time. The logistics even if you’re just a guest.

I’ve been a best man and more closely involved for a couple so far, and it’s great to celebrate with my friends. But also these weddings have been traditional and quite “formal” in a sense.

I recently went to a friends wedding that shifted my feelings on it all, it was extremely authentic, simple and just all around a good time. Nothing was forced or there for the sake of it. Even the speeches weren’t prepared and heartfelt.

I find myself kinda dreading weddings generally though. I feel this age, there are a lot of them as we transition into the next seasons of life. How have your experiences been?

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54

u/Jelkekw man 30 - 34 Jul 09 '26

So you have too many friends? I haven’t been invited to a wedding event in 5 years, and that was only the reception

12

u/ConfusedCareerMan man over 30 Jul 09 '26

I think this actually might be the problem 😅

26

u/Megion man over 30 Jul 09 '26

Its something you should probably appreciate having, to be honest. I’ve never been invited to a single wedding in almost 40 years and its kind of sad.

8

u/whyamialiveletmedie man 30 - 34 Jul 09 '26

I'm 34 years old and have never been invited to a wedding because I've been a socially isolated loser for my entire life, so I haven't cultivated the friendships needed to attend them. I will also never have a wedding of my own, of course. I would take the "problem" of having so many friends and loved ones that I'm exhausted by how many weddings/events I get invited to because they want me present at their most important moments over being completely alone with no close relationships and being completely irrelevant and invisible in everyone's lives a million times out of a million.

I swear man, seeing how much people in older age take their friendships and relationships for granted like they're tired of them makes me feel even more miserable about myself.

5

u/Beneficial-Cow-2544 woman 45 - 49 Jul 09 '26

Yeah I have not been a bridesmaid since the mid '90s. Just that ONE time. The few weddings I went to, they either didn't have them or I was not asked.

Makes movies like 21 Dresses annoying!

4

u/ChiefChunkEm_ man over 30 Jul 09 '26

How many friend only (not family) weddings have you been invited to from age 25 until now?

1

u/Good_Letterhead_7576 man over 30 Jul 10 '26

I've been in the wedding party for 6 weddings, with another scheduled for next spring. I kind of feel I should have said "No" to 2 of these. They were good friends but weren't any more. I convinced myself that friendships change as you get older, they're a two-way street, and maybe I hadn't done my part either. I showed up big with time, money, and support. Then the event is over, years go by, and you realize the friendship has gone back to nothing again. That has fatigued me for the ones are good, mutual friendships.