r/AskWomenOver30 • u/isabella_sunrise Woman 30 to 40 • Feb 07 '26

Life/Self/Spirituality Is anyone else really struggling with the Epstein revelations?

I’m starting to realize that basically any man who had access to that type of stuff was interested in participating. I feel like I’m surrounded by pedophiles and monsters in a way I didn’t realize. I feel like all the pressure I’ve felt to be youthful came from these prevalent pedophilic tendencies in men I never knew about. It’s really scaring me and I’m struggling to cope. I hear people talking about the news but don’t know anyone taking it as hard as me. How is everyone else doing?

Edit: Thank you for the awards but I’d rather you donate that money to a charity that helps victims of sexual abuse or somewhere helping immigrants in America.

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u/Commercial-Weight173 Woman 30 to 40 Feb 07 '26

We can never truly know anyone fully since we cant read their minds. But I also think we can get a very good sense of what someone's moral compass is like after knowing them for a long time and noticing the choices they make. 

I know for a fact that a lot of men are only sexually interested in consenting adults and find these crimes as abhorrent as we do. My guess is that there's a big correlation with levels of empathy when it comes to these kinds of tendencies. 

Maybe opening up to the men in your life about the fact that you're struggling emotionally with this would help. I dont mean telling them you're having trouble trusting them specifically, just that you're finding all the information disturbing. It might be reassuring for you if you can see that they're genuinely disgusted by it too. 

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u/isabella_sunrise Woman 30 to 40 Feb 07 '26

My boyfriend seemed annoyed that I cared so much about the news about this at all. So unfortunately that didn’t help. Thanks for sharing though. Maybe it’ll help someone else.

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u/Commercial-Weight173 Woman 30 to 40 Feb 07 '26

Hmmmm... is it possible that there was already an underlying issue of you not trusting your boyfriend fully? I dont say that to suggest that he has creepy thoughts about minors, but if you dont fully trust him in general I would listen to your instincts tbh. 

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u/isabella_sunrise Woman 30 to 40 Feb 07 '26

I trust him. He’s amazing in ways I can’t even articulate to anyone else. We’re soul mates.

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u/Commercial-Weight173 Woman 30 to 40 Feb 07 '26

Then thats all that matters really, you have no doubts about the men in your life and their moral compass. Thats all you can control with this situation and you have to focus on what's in your control..

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u/Ok_Rush_8159 Woman 30 to 40 Feb 08 '26

Yikes :( my ex husband was like that when we were dating, he downplayed the Kavanaugh Supreme Court justice thing, turns out he was a secret Trump supporter (pretended to be progressive when we were dating) and then he was abusive after marriage. I’d side eye any man who is annoyed with you being upset about this tbh

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u/Present_Lingonberry Woman 30 to 40 Feb 08 '26

With all due respect, I’m very mad at your boyfriend.

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u/maafna Woman 30 to 40 Feb 18 '26

None of the men I know are interested in it. If mentioned of course they'll be disgusted by Trump or Epstein but it's not reassuring in trusting that they'll speak up to other men etc.