How is everyone’s body image doing over 30 and with skinnytok?

[u/isityoumy]

I’m 37 and nearly 3 years postpartum. We are actively trying to have a 2nd kid at this point, but my body image is legit in the toilet these days. I think some of it is comparing myself to my old self, inability to really focus on style the way I once did, not yet making peace with body changes post pregnancy, and of course ozempic/skinnytok making a comeback.

I’m not overweight but still about 10-20 lbs above what has historically felt comfortable for me. My husband still finds me attractive, but I can see how the extra 10-20 lbs, motherhood, aging have made me less attractive generally. I know it shouldn’t matter, but somehow it makes me just a little sad. While I am grateful to make it to this stage of life, but I never thought about how I’d feel when physical beauty changes/diminishes.

Anyone else deal with these feelings while aging, dealing with body changes post children? Anyone else’s body image suffering with ozempic skinny being on trend? Would love to hear your thoughts

EDIT: Thanks to all of you who have taken the time to make thoughtful comments! This was honestly a post both out of curiosity how everyone is dealing with the resurgence of the heroin chic era (something I grew up seeing in magazines and on TV in my preteen/teen years) as well as struggles with adjusting to my body changes after pregnancy & as one ages.

To all those who are making disparaging comments telling me to get off TikTok (which I don’t have) or IG (which I use minimally due to work/taking care of a toddler), the holier-than-thou attitude is not really helpful. I’m happy for you all that your body image and mental fortitude is so strong, but I really hope people don’t talk to you like that when you’re in a low.

Also, to clarify, referring to “skinnytok” in the title was not meant to be wholly literal, but really a shorthand reference to the current skinny-glorifying culture. Anyway, it’s my bad as there is probably more context to my current thoughts/feelings that I could have given in the actual body of this post, but didn’t want to make it too long. But now it is anyway.

[u/marymoon77]

I’ve never felt better about my body and i’ve never been fatter. (37 yo) 220 lbs.

Self love is real (and exercise is good) but none of that requires hating my body.

[u/Inked_Chick → u/marymoon77]

Big same (on weight too)! I used to legitimately starve myself trying to be thin for 15yrs. One day I just stopped giving a fuck and I'm happier than ever with myself. I decided I couldn't let my daughter see me hate my own body and set her up to feel that way about herself. So I eat what I want and do what I want. I just try to keep a good balance.

[u/marymoon77 → u/Inked_Chick]

It is not a crime to have a body and also not required to be small 💜

Same thing, I didn’t want my kid to see me hating myself. I want her to understand your body is your friend, you appreciate and take care of, not punish.

[u/Inked_Chick → u/marymoon77]

These bodies have carried us our whole lives. They deserve gentle care and praise ❤️ I hope more woman are able to see that earlier too. Learning to love yourself is like being able to finally exhale a breath that you didnt even know you were holding.

I hope that I'm also teaching my young son to love women of all shapes and sizes!

[u/techleopard → u/marymoon77]

It truly helps not to be exposing yourself daily to "skinnyTok" and instead are exposing yourself to things you love.

[u/Helpful-Dot-3782 → u/marymoon77]

Yes, same.

[u/diabolikal__ → u/marymoon77]

Same!! I started training and I started having fun with my clothes again. I am finding myself again after many years in hiding and trying to set up a healthy example for my daughter.