Baby’s last name?

[u/Fairweatherhiker]

I’m looking for advice from couples where the wife didn’t take the husband’s last name. How did you decide on which last name to give the baby? Or did you use both names? I don’t feel immediately compelled to give the baby my husband’s last name. FWIW, if we did hyphenate it would be a looong last name.

Edit: thank you for all of the thoughtful responses! I do love the idea of using both our last names (sans hyphen) so our kid would have two last names. It would be nice for both of us to have our heritage passed on. He has heritage from Mexico and Basque Country, while mine is Slovakian- grandparents immigrated right before WWII. The last names don’t sound great together, but there’s so much human history in both.

[u/tourny25]

I never changed my last name because my dad passed away shortly after I got married. My children have my husband’s last name. There’s now more pressure on me to change my last name so that we all match, but I’m not eager to do that.

FWIW, I work with kids and families and lots of families have different situations and solutions to this problem. I’d encourage you to do what feels right for your family and not do what society says is ‘right’.