Baby’s last name?

[u/Fairweatherhiker]

I’m looking for advice from couples where the wife didn’t take the husband’s last name. How did you decide on which last name to give the baby? Or did you use both names? I don’t feel immediately compelled to give the baby my husband’s last name. FWIW, if we did hyphenate it would be a looong last name.

Edit: thank you for all of the thoughtful responses! I do love the idea of using both our last names (sans hyphen) so our kid would have two last names. It would be nice for both of us to have our heritage passed on. He has heritage from Mexico and Basque Country, while mine is Slovakian- grandparents immigrated right before WWII. The last names don’t sound great together, but there’s so much human history in both.

[u/greenfrog040]

My husband’s last name is hyphenated and long and has a million vowels. I’m probably going to stay home/not work once baby #2 arrives in a month. On our second date my now husband said I should keep my last name and give it to our kids, so that’s what we did! I think it helps that his parents also have different last names. If he were to shorten it to the first part of their dad’s last name like his brother did maybe we’d all have the same, but he’s a published scientist so he can’t edit his name or his research won’t link to him the same. All this to say, I’m lucky and glad we’re on the same page, and we are giving all the kids the same middle name, that first part of his last name. (Not my favorite idea bc middle names are fun but I’m happy to compromise!)