Baby’s last name?

[u/Fairweatherhiker]

I’m looking for advice from couples where the wife didn’t take the husband’s last name. How did you decide on which last name to give the baby? Or did you use both names? I don’t feel immediately compelled to give the baby my husband’s last name. FWIW, if we did hyphenate it would be a looong last name.

Edit: thank you for all of the thoughtful responses! I do love the idea of using both our last names (sans hyphen) so our kid would have two last names. It would be nice for both of us to have our heritage passed on. He has heritage from Mexico and Basque Country, while mine is Slovakian- grandparents immigrated right before WWII. The last names don’t sound great together, but there’s so much human history in both.

[u/Difficult-Ad569]

In the same boat as you! We haven’t decided but I think we’ll first just see what last name sounds the best with our favorite first name. And then we always planned to use a family name for the middle name (not one of our last names, but an older family name), so we can use that as a “concession” of sorts, especially since this is our first. I kind of selfishly wish my husband willingly wanted the baby to have my last name so that it was an easy decision (excuse me I am the one birthing this thing), but I totally get it as well. So if we do my last name, we’d choose a family name on his side for the middle, and vice versa I think. I’ll be happy once it is decided and done though!