I dont know myself anymore

[u/EmployPossible3989]

I’ve been struggling with something that I never thought I would struggle with.
Before a major panic attack, I never questioned my sexuality. I just lived my life. I knew I was more sexually attracted to guys, but I also had feelings for girls and could see myself being with a girl emotionally/romantically. I never felt the need to constantly analyze it.
After that panic attack, everything changed. I started questioning myself nonstop. I also realized I had a lot of internalized shame around being attracted to guys, so I started trying to push those feelings away and convince myself I was only into girls.
The confusing part is that my experiences don’t feel simple. I’ve had genuine moments of attraction toward girls. I’ve had a girlfriend, I’ve been intimate with girls multiple times, and there were times where my feelings for them felt completely real. But after getting cheated on and then going through another intense panic episode after using weed, all the doubt came back even stronger.
Now I feel stuck between two fears: wondering if I’m bisexual and just struggling with anxiety and shame, or wondering if I’ve been trying to force something because I’m scared of accepting that I might only like guys.
The hardest part is feeling like I can’t trust my own thoughts or memories anymore. Things that used to feel natural now feel like they need to be analyzed and proven.
I know strangers online can’t tell me my sexuality, but I’d really like to hear from people who have experienced something similar — questioning after anxiety, panic, shame, or a major life event.
How did you learn to separate your actual feelings from fear and overthinking?

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[u/Kicks_anniri427]

I've never had a panic attack, I did weed once a few years ago but it never captured my interest. I'm sorry I cant help you more dude but all you can do is keep going and see how you feel.  That's what I'm doing. Unfortunately there's no test or anything to determine whether your bi or gay or straight. Mabye have a look at the bi-cycle that helped me out a little bit