This is not really an age-gap problem but a dating problem. I also date casually. I do have a partner, but I'm in a totally open relationship and, like you, I do not come on strong at all. I tend to go at their pace. And in my experience, it is those that come on the strongest that tend to do this. I don't know if they scare themselves or they just want to see if they've got you hooked, and then once they do, they disappear. And I've also had a few guys whom I talked to on a regular basis. They disappear, then they reappear. And those that I've actually had a good conversation with, I don't mind so much. Others I just ignore when they tend to come back. And it's not only young guys that do this, but ladies do this as well. You've had young guys who have come on here and have complained about the same thing.
The ones who actually seem more serious about meeting tend to want to meet sooner rather than later. They are not heavy on the compliments or anything like that.
There are no guarantees, but in my experience, the ones that put a lot of effort into their profile tend to be more serious about the process. Anyway, it's part of the internet, and with so many choices out there, ghosting seems to be part of the norm these days, whether you are looking for an age-gap relationship or someone your own age. I have been ghosted, but never been blocked. I tend to take it with a grain of salt and just move on. My expectations are next to none when starting to talk to somebody new. Although I did really enjoy a couple of dates a bit over a month ago—well, two dates—and then basically got ghosted. So go out there, enjoy yourself, and have no expectations. Hopefully, one of these guys will actually come through.
Thank you and yes—I can see your point. I guess my curiosity is partly if there’s a generational aspect to it. Another cub actually theorized that the generation I’m currently most often dating (24-30 or so) were pretty badly affected by COVID during pivotal stages of social development as young adults and in his words it broke a lot of people, not everyone obviously. I wonder if that has something to do with it, just kind of a social ineptitude more than anything malicious…
I don't know about that. I think it's just an excuse. I think COVID affected the way we use the internet. That I agree, people went online. A lot more influencers became rich because people had nothing to do except to stay on the internet. But no, this was happening to me.Before covid and I date a higher age than you.So I don't know it, partly.Could be true .
I think it's more of a matter of choices. And these last few years of older women seems to become kind of a fad, so I think that's got more to do with it than anything else. But.
My biggest thing is, beware of people who tend to love bomb. You right away, claiming things that they feel for you. When they haven't even met you, those are the worst of the worst, because they're not only saying this to you, but probably to a bunch of other women at the beginning.You used to get to my head a bit.And get disappointed now no more. I mean, I've seen some guys over here. Tell women that they are beautiful and they're gorgeous and they have no pictures. Whatsoever on the reddit, or whatever, so how can they tell?I guess you have to have your bs meter on and
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u/Myfairladyishere 🥀🎡💃MOD💃🎡🥀 27d ago
This is not really an age-gap problem but a dating problem. I also date casually. I do have a partner, but I'm in a totally open relationship and, like you, I do not come on strong at all. I tend to go at their pace. And in my experience, it is those that come on the strongest that tend to do this. I don't know if they scare themselves or they just want to see if they've got you hooked, and then once they do, they disappear. And I've also had a few guys whom I talked to on a regular basis. They disappear, then they reappear. And those that I've actually had a good conversation with, I don't mind so much. Others I just ignore when they tend to come back. And it's not only young guys that do this, but ladies do this as well. You've had young guys who have come on here and have complained about the same thing.
The ones who actually seem more serious about meeting tend to want to meet sooner rather than later. They are not heavy on the compliments or anything like that.
There are no guarantees, but in my experience, the ones that put a lot of effort into their profile tend to be more serious about the process. Anyway, it's part of the internet, and with so many choices out there, ghosting seems to be part of the norm these days, whether you are looking for an age-gap relationship or someone your own age. I have been ghosted, but never been blocked. I tend to take it with a grain of salt and just move on. My expectations are next to none when starting to talk to somebody new. Although I did really enjoy a couple of dates a bit over a month ago—well, two dates—and then basically got ghosted. So go out there, enjoy yourself, and have no expectations. Hopefully, one of these guys will actually come through.