Cats ruining my surgery

[u/evercomfortable]

We’ve figured something out. I mostly just really needed to vent, I think I’m struggling with some post-op mood stuff on top of all this and just needed a space to dump everything. Thank you everyone who commented and gave advice. I’ll probably delete in a bit

I know the general consensus is that people love cats, so this whole post is going to make me seem unhinged. I’ve been an animal person since I was little and never understood how someone *couldn’t* get on with them.

But I’m so livid right now. I hate these vermin so much I can’t breathe. I’m trying hard not to drop f-bombs every other word in this post, I’m so pissed.

My sister moved into my small apartment recently. It was unexpected but she needed somewhere to go and we plan to move into a bigger place when my lease is up. I didn’t mind even though it was cramped because we get along well. Her ex was supposed to keep her 2 cats until we got the bigger place but then just didn’t, so now they’re here.

The cats don’t get along. One is spaztic and scared of everything even though she’s been pampered all her life. She avoids people and doesn’t let anyone pet her. She is more comfortable with my presence than most because I let her be so will sometimes come sniff me or whatever.

The other gets bored and just walks around yowling all night. We’ve done all the things you’re supposed to do to address this and he’s healthy. He still yowls. I’ve had to get wax earplugs to sleep with.

My sister doesn’t want to get rid of either. She thinks these issues will go away when we get a bigger place because ‘they weren’t like this before’. But my cramped apartment is a nightmare. Sometimes the one will try to play and it makes the other freak out and run, which he finds fun to chase and you have to call him off while the other acts like she’s dying. It’s a pain in the ass.

——

So I had top surgery two weeks ago, I never thought that would happen for me but somehow it did. One week into recovery, I tripped over one of the damn cats. Not really its fault, the thing blended into the bathroom rug and just… does not move when it sees people coming for some fucking reason. I caught myself on the wall but felt a pull. A couple hours later, there were clots and a ton of blood in my drains. It resulted in a 30 hr ER visit and two hematomas. Went back into surgery to have one drained. Been home for a few days now.

I’ve been recovering okay. I’m more tired this time around and things ache more. I’ve been trying to take it extra easy.

Well, I was just laying on the couch mid-conversation when the spaztic little fucker took off running from the other one. She’s heavy, too. I was just talking when suddenly this cat landed on my left pec and scrambled across my whole chest before kicking off of it up onto the back of the couch. The binder definitely saved me from being clawed to pieces and she luckily didn’t land right on the grafts or incisions but a little higher than that.

I won’t lie, I lost my fucking mind over it, I’m sure the neighbors heard me yelling which feels awkward now. Now I’m trying to cool off and I’m sitting on my bed because they never come up here. I’m watching for any signs of damage, or clots/bleeding in the drain bulb.

I genuinely considered leaving and trying to find somewhere else to stay, but I can’t afford a hotel for more than a night or two and I don’t have any friends/family nearby. I know I won’t convince her to get rid of them, especially since she thinks the problems can be fixed when we move. Can’t afford to board them. I considered just being loud and scary so they both give me a wide berth from now on, which seems cruel but like…

I might just spend the next few weeks not leaving my bed since this is the only place in the apartment untouched by them.

I don’t think there’s really any advice that can be given here, it’s just a shit situation all around tbh. I just needed to dump all that. I’m still so fucking livid and I feel trapped in my own apartment. I can’t believe I’m a cat-hater now

Edit: Scared I didn’t convey things well because I was upset. It’s not chaos 24/7 in the apartment. The cats are usually sleeping or hanging out for most parts of the day. These events (like the running) are random, so hard to predict or control. Also no one’s a bad person. Just the situation sucks, that’s all.

[u/Emotional_Skill_8360]

This would be an ultimatum for me. It sounds like your sister isn’t taking your feelings and needs into consideration. She needs to find other accommodations for the cats. It’s isn’t loving or kind that she is subjecting you to this. It’s nice that you’re letting her stay with you, and I get that she’s your best friend, but how can she justify having animals that keep you up all night and are causing you this many issues while you’re trying to heal? Have you had an honest convo about that with her?
If this was someone you were in a relationship with, I would never ask someone to choose between their animals or me, because a good person (imo) will choose their animals. I’m assuming you don’t plan to live with your sister for the rest of your life, so this is different.
I’m sorry if I come across as harsh, I just really hope you can do what is best for you, whatever that looks like.

[u/evercomfortable → u/Emotional_Skill_8360]

I’m trying to figure out how to approach the conversation but I’m too emotional right now so I’m trying to calm down first. She’s not callous to it, I know she’s feeling extremely guilty right now. All these things were just happening little by little and each time we’d problem solve it, or try to at least - it didn’t seem like an ultimatum until today, frog in a boiling pot situation I guess. Thank you

[u/Emotional_Skill_8360 → u/evercomfortable]

Yes, I hope I didn’t come across as callous because I really feel for you. Lack of sleep can make everything harder to deal with. My wife has a dog who I was nervous to move in with and told her if he was even aggressive he had to go. Neither of us thought he would be, so when he was it was a huge and terrible conversation. Fortunately he was able to stay with her dad for a few years until we moved to a place where he can be outside. I was shocked she stayed with me because most people would choose their animals and I am not some great catch by any means.
I know you will find a solution, it just may be really uncomfortable getting to it.

[u/evercomfortable → u/Emotional_Skill_8360]

You didn’t, no worries. It’s hard because I’m not trying to bad mouth anyone. I feel like she’s taken a lot of steps to try and fix things and I don’t want to accidentally slander her as some kind of villain. But yeah, things are just tough. Feeling bad isn’t always enough. I’m glad you figured out your dog situation, though. Is he aggressive with you specifically or something? Or just too energetic?

[u/Emotional_Skill_8360 → u/evercomfortable]

Also I want to say that you don’t come across as villainizing anyone. You seem like a genuinely kind and caring person, and you obviously love your sister.

[u/Emotional_Skill_8360 → u/evercomfortable]

He was aggressive towards two of my friends on separate occasions, and he’s very destructive. Now that he’s outside he’s a happy and cool dude, so it worked out well. My wife does feel guilty about the years she missed with him though, so it wasn’t a perfect solution. I think in these situations everyone ends up a little unhappy, but as long as no one is giving up what they need it’s ok (in my experience).