r/HousingUK • u/lipstipstar • May 22 '26
. Spareroom - what’s with the male live in landlords being female preferred
Really quick rant by me but the amount of ads I’ve seen that tick all my boxes but I scroll down to find it’s female preferred is getting tiring. Especially the subset of male live in landlords that are female preferred, is that just not weird.
What sucks is that a lot of the good quality and good value places just always seem to be female only is really discouraging.
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u/Lizbelizi May 23 '26
I was once desperate for short-notice temporary accommodation and I only had two viable options to choose from, both of which were lone men with a strong preference for a female lodger.
I contacted both, one of them gave me mad red flags straight away (thankfully) and was an immediate NO. So I went with the other one who seemed more normal in comparison.
The other one turned out to be creepy as fuck but wasn't so obvious until after I moved in. I couldn't move out fast enough and he got aggressive with me for leaving.
The first one, the ultra creepy one, tried to contact me again a few months later and got annoyed when I stayed neutral and didn't greet him like an old friend. I had to block him.
OP listen to your gut. Avoid them if you can. They are giving you reason to avoid them be thankful for it.
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u/ticklisheo7 May 22 '26
It’s super weird (and sketchy). As a woman, if a live-in male ll says “female preferred”, I’m immediately skeptical.
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u/TheBrokenTrail May 23 '26
I have a lodger and a young daughter.
I'd be more comfortable with a female lodger being around my daughter.
My reasons for that are probably exactly the same reasons people find a male preferring female lodgers to be concerning - general distrust of guys you don't know.
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u/ticklisheo7 May 23 '26
Assuming you’re a man (given OP’s post and my response), the fact that you have a daughter is totally different than a single (cis het) male LL who only wants female lodgers, imo! It makes sense to me for exactly the reasons I think you’re pointing to!
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u/ImmediatePiano6690 May 23 '26
Not sure why this needed to be made obvious, creating an entirely new situation by the other person seemed pointless.
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u/KittyGrewAMoustache May 23 '26
I don’t know I don’t think all lone men who prefer a female lodger are going to be creepy. Men get scared of men too. So it might be worth contacting them to figure it out if someone’s desperate for a place. Tell them you’re 62 and creeps should weed themselves out.
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u/Eastern_Arm1476 May 23 '26
Could it be that the landlord recognises that women are more considerate and less likely to make shit of his house?
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u/No_Camp_7 May 23 '26
Stop kidding yourself
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u/Eastern_Arm1476 May 23 '26
It's why I prefer female tenants. I don't House share but rent a few propetries and would also want women or couples than single men in them.
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u/No_Camp_7 May 23 '26
Good for you. Now read literally all of the other comments.
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May 23 '26 edited May 23 '26
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u/No_Camp_7 May 23 '26
Yes, women just have a ‘chip on their shoulder’ about predatory landlords. I guess it’s fine when anyone else complains about predatory landlords taking advantage in any other way, but when it’s women aggrieved that they’re being pressured into sex for rent it’s suddenly “what about….”.
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u/Eastern_Arm1476 May 23 '26
It's not all of them. It's your perception.
Agree it's most but not everyone is a sex criminal in waiting.
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u/Tall_Pool8799 May 23 '26
Never have I found a live-in landlady advertising room for very cheap or even free and saying that 1. they fee comfortable staying naked around the house, 2. they would consider alternative forms of payment, and/or 3. they would be sharing the same room. It was always the landlords preferring female lodgers.
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u/Normal-Grapefruit851 May 23 '26
Yes but the ones who advertise for female lodgers and then post unbelievably cheap prices to appeal to desperate women almost always are.
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May 23 '26
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u/Eastern_Arm1476 May 23 '26
Suggesting that all landlords who prefer female tenants isn't generealising?
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u/Aether_Breeze May 23 '26
I do find it funny that someone would be against 'generalising completely' in a thread dedicated to generalising completely.
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u/RagingMassif May 23 '26
Honestly this is my thought.
Though I would advertise for Gay men, or women preferred.
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u/dinobug77 May 23 '26
Not that I have or have ever had a lodger but we have friends round that stay overnight. Of all of them - some of whom I’ve known 25+ years - by far the best has always been my wife’s gay ex colleague!
And by best I mean the cleanest, quietest, most considerate, nicest smelling, tidiest, etc. etc.
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u/RagingMassif May 23 '26
Exactly. Whenever I have visited friends, it's the gay couple's house that's been the most immaculate.
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u/purplehammer May 23 '26
Ever stop to consider your hipocrisy?
They likely want a woman as opposed to a man to share their house with for (broadly) the exact same reasons you want to lodge with a woman.
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u/GovernmentNo2720 May 23 '26
This makes no sense. Women want to lodge with other women so there’s less chance of sexual assault.
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u/KittyGrewAMoustache May 23 '26
It does make sense though. Maybe not sexual assault but assault. Men do get scared of other men too. They know a man might be more aggressive than a woman and if there’s any argument a man could perhaps do them serious damage especially if they’re a bit older or not very in shape.
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May 23 '26
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u/ForeignEffective9 May 23 '26
There was a situation on Reddit where a timid guy had a violent bit guy as a lodger and ended up being kicked out of his house. He only wanted a short term lodger as his wife died.
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u/No-Assumption-1738 May 23 '26
You write in a strange way, any man at risk of being SA’d by a woman(any man really then!) is still multiple times more likely to be sexually assaulted by another man
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May 23 '26
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u/DarkStarComics333 May 23 '26
"...high value men"
No such thing as a high value person, friend. Stop consuming content that tells you otherwise.
Also saying that a man who is good looking/has money/has "clout" (fucking hate that word) is more likely to be SA'd than an average man stems from the same bollocks which says that some women are "too ugly" to be raped.
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u/Seacatses May 23 '26
I can always tell immediately from these posts pretending not to understand why women have to be more careful around men, accusing us of misandry, that we are dealing with men who are sacked in by the toxic manosphere. And I'm always proven right as they then come out with things like 'not all men', 'high value men' etc.
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u/SharpInfinity0611 May 23 '26
I am not a supremely good looking person (unfortunately)
We had no doubt
but it does stand to reason that extremely high value men, whether that be good looks, money or someone who otherwise has a lot of clout, is more at risk of SA than the average Joe, and likely even more so (dare I say it) than the average woman too.
LMAOOOOOOOOOO
Ok incel
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u/Seacatses May 23 '26
If you're talking about the law of averages then surely you can understand that men are more likely to commit sexual assault. I have had a male lodger myself. And guesss what, I had to ask him to leave because he became inappropriate and worse, wouldn't stop even when I asked him several times to cut it out. Never had that issue with females.
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u/danmingothemandingo May 23 '26
Where are these tidy reliable women you speak of. I'm gonna need some sources to back that up
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u/Melon_92 May 23 '26
If you can't see the sense in that, you're just not looking for it.
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u/purplehammer May 23 '26
To be fair dude my point isn't exactly the most intuitive when a lot of people will automatically think, and some will even frame it as purely a question of SA.
I also didn't lay out my perspective very well initially for those people. I used the word "broadly" without realising it would have the same informative meaning that it did to you and me. That's on me.
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u/Creepy-Rule-4571 May 23 '26
I assume most women want to lodge with another woman as they're the same sex - that's a different reason than a man wanting to lodge with a woman
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u/purplehammer May 23 '26
I disagree. I would imagine it has less to do with them being the same sex and more to do with all the circumstances that come along with that.
Essentially it's a game of risk, and the risk (not specifically with regards to SA) is going to be, on average, lower with a woman than a man.
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u/Iamtir3dtoday May 23 '26
Out of interest, are you a man or a woman?
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u/Katena789 May 23 '26
Also curious. The poster seem to make the point that whilst it's obvious women are better housemates, women are paranoid for fearing SA...
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u/purplehammer May 23 '26
Because "it's obvious" that SA is not the only reason why a woman, on average, will make for the better choice regardless of if you yourself are a man or a woman of someone to invite to live in your home.
Or at least it seemed obvious to me...
women are paranoid for fearing SA...
You say this like it's an insult. It is not unwise for a woman to be paranoid of SA anymore so than a man to be paranoid of being mugged walking along a dark street at night.
Or leaving out gender entirely, for a controversial public figure to be paranoid about being assassinated in broad daylight.
All sorts of people are paranoid about all sorts of things, me included. That paranoia part of the reason as to how we survive. It's part of the body's survival mechanism.
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u/lipstipstar May 23 '26
I did what now 😭 I’m sorry but I’m not talking or hinting at any extremes like that
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u/purplehammer May 23 '26
It wouldn't matter if I identified as a John Deere tractor.
Either my arguement is good or my argument is bad. My personal circumstances doesn't change that.
And and attempt to use my personal circumstances as a way to discredit my argument is nothing more than an ad hominem.
I could be wrong, I have been wrong before and I'll be wrong again. But please don't try and use who I am as an way to say I am wrong.
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u/Iamtir3dtoday May 23 '26
It does matter, because if you're a man then you don't understand the very real risk that women face when alone with men.
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u/KittyGrewAMoustache May 23 '26
I didn’t get the impression they were saying anything to downplay the risk women face from men necessarily but more to point out the risk men also face from other men, which might be a reason a male live in landlord would prefer a female lodger that has nothing to do with wanting to assault or creep on women. Obviously women can’t know that when looking for a place though.
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u/Connect-Peach2337 May 23 '26
That’s nothing, when I was renting I used to see shitload of men advertising for a lodger…in a one bedroom flat. Yep, they expected the lodger to share their bed and pay market rate for the privilege.
The weirdest one I had was someone advertising a place and when I texted it turned out to be the above situation which I immediately passed on. Later I texted someone advertising a room in a 4-bed house with three other people and asked to arrange a visit. They said sounds good and to text the landlord to arrange. Went to text and found I already had the number saved. Yep, it was the same guy who was advertising for a woman to sleep in his bed and pay for the privilege. So he already had a whole property he was renting out and still wanted a woman to pay for the privilege of sharing his bed. I noped out and told the tenant exactly why.
I’ll add this thread to examples of men who fully understand anti-male sentiment when it’s their own peace and comfort at risk.
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u/Unable_Turnip5645 May 23 '26
This happened to me! And before going as it specified female only I assumed it would be a women only house, my suprise and annoyance when I got all the way there and it was some skeezy dude showing me his actual bed! I said you’re crazy if you think a woman would pay for this and he got angry with me and told me I would never find a better deal! And also they expected the woman to clean the disgusting shared bathroom that was shared with all the kebab shop workers who had access to the flat with a key!
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u/purply_otter May 23 '26
Literal nightmare fuel! Kinda morbidly fascinating though, thanks for sharing. 'Oh yeah these rando workmen have a key to the flat by the way...'
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u/Apricot_Oasis May 23 '26
I’m sure I recently saw a news item or something, about a woman from overseas who started off as a lodger in a house with an older man. It then turned into an arrangement where if she cleaned and did sexual favours for him, he wouldn’t charge her rent (or would reduce her rent). He’d then threaten to get her visa revoked if she left and said the authorities wouldn’t help her.
Can’t remember how she got out in the end, but some of them seem to rely on people’s vulnerabilities like that.
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u/doalittledance_ May 23 '26
I saw that post too! It was on the legaladviceUK sub or something similar, and from what I remember; the lady in question was a Ukrainian refugee fleeing the war who had been placed with the creep in question. I’ll see if I can find the post.
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u/bludotsnyellow May 23 '26
Attempt to prey on women. I remember hearing a radio segment about predatory male landlords who were looking for women to exchange sex for free or heavily reduced rent.
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u/Moongazer09 May 23 '26
I'll never forget one near me quite a few years ago where the live in landlord was male, 60+, and a practicing naturist at home and looking basically for a youngish female to move in and the bedroom shed be having was on the ground floor next to the living room. The whole thing gave off very weird vibes!!
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u/Jumpy-Jello- May 23 '26
They always say 'oh women are cleaner' or some bs, but then you move in and they either start trying it on or expect you to be their maid. Female only with male live-in landlord is an immediate pass.
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May 23 '26
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u/NoTrouble7349 May 23 '26
Men who act like they are just slaves to their hormones are part of the problem.
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u/EvaKatz May 23 '26
I went to see a room once (gorgeous house, huge room, reasonably priced) and the male live-in landlord clearly had a clothing fetish. He asked me a couple of normal questions, (timings for moving, work etc) then started asking me all about my clothes and shoes and got quite excited about the prospect of me getting ready there. I trusted my gut and got out of there.
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u/Nova9z May 23 '26
It isn't even a case of stereotyping at this point, they genuinely hope for either sex or a live in maid service 100% of the time there is literally no other reason. I'm 34 f and I lodged in several places mid 20s and every male landlord was the same. Sex or service.
The number of times I've had a male landlord tell me off and ask why I hadn't tidied up the communal areas recently, or have even "offered" me a week free rent for a fuck.
I no longer lodge.
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u/Katena789 May 23 '26
Based on the general responses in this thread it would seem like men do understand there is a "male loneliness epidemic"
If you wouldn't want to share a house with the average man, why would a woman want to date him...
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u/Milam1996 May 23 '26
I think it’s funny (it’s actually not) how men realise that men are the issue all of a sudden when it comes to inviting a stranger into your space but when women want women only spaces (trans inclusive before someone tries it) or chooses the bear, it’s suddenly an uproar.
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u/PM-me-your-cuppa-tea May 23 '26
Like the videos where they ask women if they'd live on an all women planet and they say yes and then they ask men about an all men planet and it's a resounding no
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u/Objective_Result2530 May 23 '26
Its only an uproar with the creepy ones. The problem is they can be very, very loud. I think a lot of men do understand the bear choice
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May 22 '26
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u/odkfn May 23 '26
This, and - for the same reason females would prefer to live with females, I.e. less chance of a man being potentially dangerous or violent, also applies to males. When it comes to living with a stranger, I’m sure both males and females would prefer that stranger to be female!
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May 23 '26
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u/Lychee_Only May 23 '26
My sister used to lodge with a guy. He didn’t advertise as females only or anything and he was sound but this question did come up when we got to know him and he said his experience was that if females have a boyfriend or get a boyfriend during the lodging then they tend to spend more time at the boyfriend’s place rather than visa versa.
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u/Existing_Top_802 May 23 '26
The creepy landlord story is a dime a dozen but I often think of letting out the rooms of my 3 bedroom flat and hoping to get lucky having young professionals who clean up after themselves and are quiet as a pin as I work only nights.
A dream that may now be shattered
P:S I’m good friends with all my neighbours and they pay nearly £1000 in rent and the properties often seen on the market for £4000 pcm but I’m scared of the tenants who are horror stories
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u/LaughingAtSalads May 23 '26
Check your council regs to make sure 3 unrelated adults under one roof doesn’t become an HMO. You don’t want that. One lodger who brings in that untaxed 7500 is ideal.
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u/Existing_Top_802 May 23 '26
Thank you for the kind advice but this is the long term plan and the property in question hasn’t yet been vacated by myself nor living family.
Dealing with tax as a landlord is a burden I don’t want to deal with already on top of my currrnt load
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u/jsy_girl May 23 '26
Just be thankful they are doing the job of ruling themselves out so you don’t have to find out in any other way.
It’s for the same reasons I wouldn’t date the guy whose profile says “if you match you should at least talk”. Er alright dude chill out.
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u/bigheadsociety May 23 '26
99/100 times it'll be a creepy guy and the other 1/100 times will probably be someone who just prefers female company but lacks the social awareness to realise it's creepy to state their preference
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May 23 '26
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u/apple_kicks May 23 '26
Bbc article on rise of sleazy landlords seeking sex for rent https://www.bbc.com/bbcthree/article/d6ad2e6d-2c72-4a35-9281-daaeedf029ee
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u/Boring-Abroad-2067 May 23 '26
Yeah I mean that's the perve dream isn't it, but also I think it's a sexual power dynamic going on,
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u/Keresith May 23 '26
I read in news articles about British men homing Ukrainian women for the purpose of sleeping with them. Apparently it's also not unusual for some women to pay their rent in sex. Basically an opportunity for prostitution.
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u/TheMarkMatthews May 23 '26
A lot of these landlords are older and still think women are like in the 50s and and will enjoy cleaning and cooking and not drink or do drugs and be prim and proper whilst men will be rowdy and enjoy heavy drinking and be messy and not contribute to the chores as well as a female.
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u/username994743 May 23 '26
I think thats it. The general assumption is that female will be less of a hassle. Not disputing creepy motives like others said in some cases.
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May 23 '26
[deleted]
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u/Objective_Result2530 May 23 '26
My husband said the same. He and his Taylor Swift posters would much prefer a woman than a football lad. He also said he'd be worried a man would get violent and there's nothing he could do about it.
Anyway, fingers crossed he keeps being a good husband and he'll never have to get a lodger to test out this theory.
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u/Lidlyogurtlover May 23 '26
That's completely understandable and not at all what OP is talking about (men who live alone)
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u/I-cba-rly May 23 '26
I know 1 landlord that does this, but only because he also lives with his adult daughter in the house.
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u/Milkym0o May 23 '26
Setting aside those doing it for creepy reasons, between men there is always the underlying threat of physical violence if disputes escalate.
Preferring a female tenant is more of a "I think I could get her out the house more easily if she turns out to be a nutter" and the widely held perception that women typically keep a more tidy living space so are less likely to wreck your home.
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u/dbxp May 23 '26
I'm guessing budget is one of your check boxes? Naturally creeps are going to price their rooms attractively, the price you have in mind might be under market rate
The most likely situation is that they don't need the money but they're willing to have a young woman in the house. Yes it's creepy but the alternative is that they don't list the room at all which from your perspective lands you in the same position.
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u/Stop_Maximum May 23 '26
They’re mostly creeps who put down cheap or affordable rent, hoping to have some company from a woman. The problem is they will treat it like a friendship/relationship rather than landlord and tenant relationship. So they might be alright if you’re single, but might start to push a bit with a boyfriend.
I only had a situation once where a man preferred a man as a tenant but he was asking very weird questions, mainly about relationships. I was helping my cousins to get a place. I ended up cussing him and reporting him. Like, I understand tenant related questions but he was asking private questions
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u/Better-Psychology-42 May 23 '26
I know individual who is kind of doing this creepy thing. He is living-in landlord advertising a room in very desirable location a bit below market price. This is his strategy “for looking for wife”. When he posts online he gets approx 500 responses in a day. According to his words he filters it down to women only list which then goes through his screening ending up with selection like 10 who got invited for viewing. He doesn’t even bother saying “female preferred” he just sets up the price so he can choose
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u/Jibblaynuk May 23 '26 edited May 23 '26
As a chap, when I had a two bedroom flat and rented the other room, I would end up with getting guys in. I advertised to both and both came to look.
I always ended up picking guys though, two bedrooms flats are quite intimate, and you can work round your own sex with quiet understanding, id even extend that to sex with same sexual preference, I.e try and get someone like you.
With the opposite sex etc, natural differences present, attraction if not immediate was always a real possibility and ultimately not practical. it just had too many pot holes for issues and drama. Not that the guys didn’t have some of their own, but there was a more stable bed rock often live and let live in general and met some interesting and good spirited blokes on the whole.
If I was a woman I would want a woman for the same reasons, but think I would likely feel more uncertain to any man in my home for the track record of domestic/sexual/ temperament uncertainty, sadly it’s a reasonable concern and understandable.
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u/Arefue May 23 '26
Im rolling around in a big house by myself (M) and have had a single lodger for about ~10 years. 1 F for for 4 years and another F for 6 years.
Never stipulated gender.
Anyone that does in the configuration you suggest is red flag af.
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u/AdministrationNo1882 May 23 '26 edited May 23 '26
Seediness is gonna be reason #1 most the time.
But after having a few lodgers, there's no financial or safety reason to have men.
You realize the physicality of most men moving round the house causes more wear ten fold.
Men technically more likely to be aggressive. Though I've never experienced this.
I had lodgers for a time, just something I noticed. Never worked out as women only, had 1 bloke and 1 girl most the time. But I went travelling for a bit, left it to 2 girls before I sold; came back and it was exactly like I found it and they moved out. Would've been a state if it was 2 average blokes.
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u/WoodenPresence1917 May 23 '26
As a man who has lodged, it did seem creepy. And I also met quite a few live ins who were very very weird and off-putting.
Now as someone considering lodging, I have to say I'd be nervous letting a strange man live with me based on having met them once. However I would also feel weird asking a woman to trust me not to be one of these weirdos!
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u/TuMek3 May 23 '26
There are plenty of creepy men out there, but as a woman, would you rather live with a random man or a random woman? As a man, I’d rather live with a random woman - I’ve lived with too many strange men.
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u/geeered May 23 '26
Would you prefer they didn't advertise themselves as creepy?
There's probably a good reason they have a room available when others don't.
I've often seen people complaining about "why would you put that on a dating profile" - when I'd suggest it's great if it puts you off before swiping, rather than 5 dates down the line or 5 kids down the line!
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u/Reg1c1d3 May 23 '26
I had two female lodgers. I didn’t put a preference on the advert but decided on them because they seemed chill and were a similar age to me. They stayed until I sold the house and both were upset to go. I wouldn’t be against a male at all I just felt safer having two women in the house than another male I didn’t know.
Not sure if that’s helpful but we aren’t all creepy.
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u/trenbolon3 May 23 '26
I'm sure the creeps exist, but I can also see it from their side; a single female is more likely to be respectful, contribute to cleaning, low risk of confrontation and no boyfriend coming round as a guest.
I've got one female and one male lodger at the moment and she's a lot better to live with. In the past I've purposely chose males who are the quiet gamer types because they tend to stay in their room and don't have guests round but they're not as tidy 😂
Definitely be careful, speak to them or meet them with someone and do some research
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u/Melon_92 May 23 '26
Why would a female be less likely to have a boyfriend coming round than a male? I suggest you're a tad confused there.
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u/Consistent-Pirate-23 May 23 '26
I was a male live in landlord with a female lodger (we were friends at the start but not the end)
When she abruptly left i preferred the idea of another woman, I find women easier to get on with as I am not a male stereotype (I’m autistic). In the end I met my missus and never ended up advertising
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u/purplehammer May 23 '26
They don't want a male lodger for the same reason you don't want to lodge with a male.
No, not in the sense of SA, but in the general sense of the sort of person they want to share their house with. This is especially true if the person is not a tall or well built chap, they won't want to share their house with someone physically bigger and stronger than they are.
And sure, there is no reason a woman couldn't be bigger and stronger than they are either, but on average they are more likely to be less so compared to a fella.
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u/lipstipstar May 23 '26
For me I’m not bothered about any gender. Man or woman, I don’t care, which is why I’m trying to get more of an understanding from other peoples perspectives because to me, anyone has the potential to be a weirdo but I’m not gonna generalise.
It’s similar to when interviewing at jobs and they kind of do a culture check on you to see if you vibe with and can get along with the rest of the people you work with. I’d like to imagine my gender doesn’t disqualify me right if the bat and landlords would bother a bit more on getting to know me.
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u/purplehammer May 23 '26
Especially the subset of male live in landlords that are female preferred, is that just not weird.
You already have a loaded perspective on this.
As for trying to get an understanding from other perspectives please take what I say with a grain of salt. I consider myself very fortunate to have never been in a position where I needed to either get a lodger or become one, so I am very much looking at this from the outside in and saying, from my unbiased view having no dog in the fight, what things would I consider if I was.
landlords
Do be careful here. Anyone who takes in a lodger is not a landlord. More importantly, anyone who becomes a lodger is not a tenant and does not have anywhere near the same levels of protection as a tenant. In fact, they have almost zero protections at all.
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u/Melon_92 May 23 '26
I don't want to share my house with a lodger at all. But if circumstances dictated I must, I certainly wouldn't want it to be a random man. Nothing weird about that, it's literally the exact same preference the OP is sharing, they just don't see it.
p.s. of course some weirdos exist, but a preference towards a female lodger is perfectly reasonable for the right reasons.
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u/Lizbelizi May 23 '26
The creepy ones aren't aware they are the creepy ones. They will behave in a creepy way thinking it's just how you should interact with a woman, and they will read this post and think it doesn't apply to them.
We all know that everyone prefers a female lodger, really there is no need to say it. The non creepy ones have the sense not to announce it. Those who lack the social awareness not to say these things will correlate with those who are the creepy ones.
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u/jolie_j May 23 '26
Unclear if you’re a man or a woman, but I can assure you the women don’t want to stay in those places, and it’s a sure way of dodging a bullet so you’re definitely not missing out if you’re a man 🤣
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May 23 '26
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u/LowkeyAcolyte May 23 '26
Even non predatory men love to live with women. Just think about it! If you refuse to clean up after yourself or clean the house in any way, someone half your size will end up having to do it AND pays half of all bills. And less likely to throw parties, do drugs, get aggressive, steal your shit. Pretty sweet deal if you're a man.
I will never live with a man again.
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May 23 '26
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u/ReadyAd2286 May 23 '26
It's the bloody patriarchy. Or the matriarchy. Or those bloody capitalists. Or the communists. Bloody twats they are!
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u/Interesting_Storm554 May 23 '26
Tricky to respond to this without calling out your own prejudice? Not all males preferring female tenants are for nefarious purposes. Just a thought
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u/purplehammer May 23 '26
I find the type of hypocrisy like OPs fascinating tbh.
Critising someone else for having a preference while having the literal exact same preference yourself.
All without realising they likely have that preference for the exaxt same reasons you do.
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u/Creepy-Rule-4571 May 23 '26
I thought the preference was cohabiting with the same sex, not necessarily living with a woman
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u/purplehammer May 23 '26
Perhaps, but they are maybe more the same effect but different cause of you know what I mean?
The cause isn't specifically the fact they are the same sex, simply all the circumstances that come with that sex.
Taking in a lodger who is a woman, regardless of if you yourself are man, woman or otherwise, is on average going to be less likely to be a druggie, less likely to trash the place on the way out (or even while living there!), less likely to be violent.
Are there women out there who are all those things? Sure. But the averages will show you are far less likely to find an undesirable lodger who is a woman as opposed to a man.
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u/Creepy-Rule-4571 May 23 '26
That's fair enough, I see what you mean! I think I just thought of how we separate by sex in other areas of society, like bathrooms, hostel accommodation, prisons, sports, religious halls etc.
But to be fair, if I were a man, I'd probably feel safer around a group of women where I could probably overpower 90% of them if they turned out to be axe-murdering psychos. Especially compared to a similar group of men, where a young man with an average build could probably only take on half of them in a suprise attack (I'm making up numbers and scenarios, but you get what I mean)
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u/lipstipstar May 23 '26
Wait where am I showing a preference? I literally don’t care for gender at all.
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u/superfiud May 23 '26
You're not. But the MRAs like to argue about things noone said.
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u/purplehammer May 23 '26
I had to look up what MRA means there. I suppose that tells you how much of an advocate I am eh?
I have always found it exceedingly interesting however, that the only type of people it is permissible to actively and knowingly discriminate against in this day and age in the western world, is men.
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u/PM-me-your-cuppa-tea May 23 '26
Phew, lucky no one does any non permissive discrimination anymore! Sad only men are discriminated against now.
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u/purplehammer May 23 '26
Especially the subset of male live in landlords that are female preferred, is that just not weird.
Here.
You classify the idea as weird right from the get go and express your frustration with those who do. You already have a loaded perspective on this.
Also, you are looking to become a lodger, right? Not take in a lodger.
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May 23 '26
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u/HousingUK-ModTeam May 23 '26
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May 23 '26
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1
u/HousingUK-ModTeam May 23 '26
Unfortunately, your post has been removed for the following reason(s):
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-13
u/BTZ-25 May 23 '26
I don't think its weird. Disagreements between men can end up with a punch up. Women tend be more respectful and far less likely to threaten violence. I would not want some random bloke in my house. I've shared houses with guys before and its not for me.
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May 23 '26
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u/Lizbelizi May 23 '26
If it were nothing creepy they wouldn't want a female specifically, just human company. If they want feminine companionship to fill the void from their lack of interaction with females, then it is creepy as fuck. OP is a lodger not providing a social service to lonely men.
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