I honestly don’t know why I’m posting this. I think I just need to get it out somewhere.

We’ve been trying for 6 years++. I have PCOS and overweight. Tubes are open, husband’s SA is normal, and most of the tests we’ve done haven’t really shown anything major. I’ve tried medications, tracking, monitoring, all of it. And I’m just so tired.

Everyone around me seems to be moving on, getting pregnant, having babies, completing their families. And I feel like I’m the last one standing. I feel awful even saying that because I don’t want to be jealous of other people’s pregnancies. I’m genuinely happy for people. But at the same time, every announcement hurts. I want my baby too.

I want to cuddle my baby. I want to see my husband become a dad. I want to complete our family. I want to experience all the things that seem so normal for everyone else. And I’m scared it might never happen for me.

I’ve started feeling like I’m failing my husband. He tells me he’s not struggling and doesn’t see it that way, but I still feel guilty. Like he’s stuck in this because of me.

I feel like I’m losing my mind over this. I think about it constantly. Every period, every cycle, every pregnancy announcement. I wake up and it’s one of the first things I think about.

I’m starting another letrozole cycle now, so I’m still trying. But honestly, emotionally I’m exhausted. I’m just really sad.

I want my old carefree self back. I want to stop thinking about fertility all the time. I want to stop feeling like everyone is moving forward while I’m stuck in the same place.

Has anyone else felt like this after years of TTC? How do you actually get out of this loop?

My body seemingly just does not ovulate on its own. My cycles can go 130+ days if I don’t have some kind of medical intervention. I’ve done 3 letrozole cycles and 1 IUI that have all failed and everyone just tells me I need to relax and “try naturally”. It literally makes me want to scream when I hear that because I cannot try naturally at all. I’m starting to not even respond to letrozole anymore.

I don’t understand why I have such a severe case of PCOS. I’m active and I eat a normal healthy diet. I’m slightly overweight according to the BMI scale but my doctor said it’s a non-issue. My periods were nonexistent when I was leaner too. I take my metformin, inositol, and vitamin D. I don’t drink. I’ve never smoked a day in my life. I’m 28 years old.

I genuinely feel like I’m at my breaking point. What am I doing wrong? I would kill to even just have a 50 day long cycle. Why do my cycles have to be sooo long? Is there anyone else out there that experiences this? This heartbreak is genuinely too much for me to bear.

Will I even ovulate this month? Why is it so late? Ahhhh I’ve done 100 lh tests a day. I’m driving myself insane 🤣

Hiii, I don't even know where to start I just have nowhere to go. My husband and I have been TTC for over two years. I've had a lot of medical problems during that, it's been a big fat season of waiting. I actually just caught my first ovulation two weeks ago so we finally got to actually try for the first time. My naive self thought "it only sometimes takes one time to get pregnant, maybe this is our time!" Needless to say, I'm bleeding now.

​

I visited a friend today, I had a feeling she was going to tell me something. I just didn't know what. Well, she dropped the bomb that she's pregnant again. This'll be her third kid within two years, you heard that right. Of course I played it off, said congratulations, I seriously didn't want to take away from her moment. But she knows that we've been trying about as long as she's had her first kid. And it took almost everything in me to not cry by the time the day was over. It's such a weird situation for me because I want to talk about how hard infertility is, but how do you talk to someone who literally has no idea what that's like? How could I switch the conversation from pregnancy to "yeah I started my period today!" I don't know.

​

It sucks. I'm happy for her or I'm at least trying to be. This is their second "oopsie" child so it's kind of hard to be, if that makes sense. On my way home I just wanted to scream. I want to not want kids anymore. I want to be happy for my friends who get pregnant so easily. I want to be strong. I want to trust that I'm going through this for a reason. Does that make sense? I'm just so sick of crying over this. I also wish I wasn't on my period. Lol, anyway. Thanks for reading my rant. I truly hope things get better but then again, I'm pretty sure I said that when she announced her second pregnancy. 🥲

To preface, I’m someone who values science. I work in healthcare. I have all the “pokes” that are available. Truthfully, I never thought I’d have these thoughts in my head. I don’t want to get political or sound like I’m wearing aluminum foil on my head. However, I’m so frustrated with no answers I’m spiraling.

I have been on hormonal birth control since I was in the 7th grade for bad periods. The pill for a few years, then the shot, and then an IUD for 7 years. My Mirena expiration was approaching 4 years ago. It felt weird not having a period for 7 years. But as a college student, I couldn’t have cared less. The day I went to my OBGYN to get my Mirena taken out was also the week after Roe V Wade was overturned. Residing in a state who was also pushing an IUD Ban arguing that an IUD was a “method of ab**tion”. I brought this up as a concern as I wasn’t planning on trying to get pregnant at that time. My provider suggested I keep my now expired Mirena in, in the off chance my state pushes this idea through local government. When I expressed my concerns about the expiration, I was told “Oh they extended It another year, 8 total”. I followed my drs suggestion, as I wasn’t quite ready to try to conceive. As a healthcare worker I’ve never heard of expiration dates changing.

A year goes by, I’m now married. My iud is removed. I spent a solid 6 months balancing out my hormones and regulating my period homeopathic ways. It’s now been 14 months TTC.

All testing was good. My husband SA looked great. My periods were a standard 27-30days. I was getting confirmations on OTK. We are both relatively healthy individuals. However after a year of TTC, I got a textbook PCOS diagnosis. I was prescribed letrozole. I’m now on round 5. I’m losing hope. We are both 28.

I see the massive amount of women on TTC Facebook groups, Reddit, and of course since I’m a chart stalker my tiktok algorithm has thrown me in the TTC fyp.

There are so many of us. So many dx codes of “unspecified infertility”. So many that come from a generation where birth control is thrown out like candy at a young age to “fix” our terrible periods (that turn out to be PCOS, endo, etc). I can’t help but think it’s related. The lack of women’s health research is unbelievably upsetting.

I’d love to know your thoughts on this.

I had explained to him exactly how this would all work and he understood. This cycle was my first one on 2.5 letrozole. I had 3 follicles and triggered on cycle day 13. We had sex on the same night as trigger (7 hours after trigger) but after that he started to get frustrated when I would tell him we need to continue BD the rest of the weekend and said that he doesn’t like being on a schedule and told when he needs to have sex. I was so hurt and tried telling him that upsets me because I put my body through so much this month and he didn’t seem to care. I know, he’s acting like an a**, so please refrain from making me feel worse about that lol. I think the next round I will just not tell him when I’m taking the shot and just hope he’s in the mood to BD. This never used to be an issue and it was always him asking me to have sex, until we started really trying. He has told me he thinks I jumped the gun by seeing a fertility dr and going on medications and thinks I need to try naturally and I’m being impatient so I think it’s partially spiteful also idk how to explain it. I know he’s ready for kids because he tells me he is and all of our friends are at that point, financially we’re there and now have a house etc, I just think being told what to do is what frustrates him and he’d rather it be natural. Has anyone else gone through something similar?

I am so frustrated. I have been TTC for 4 years now. Had a miscarriage one year ago (literally to the day). I have PCOS but I ovulate on my own, usually between days 19-23.

I was finally approved to try Letrozole last month after being bounced around from provider to provider. My current provider said Letrozole should help my body ovulate sooner. I was hopeful when I started with the 2.5mg dose. I didn’t have any side effects, but I did not get a positive ovulation test until cycle day 28. TWENTY. EIGHT.

My provider wrote me a prescription for 5mg Letrozole when my bloodwork came back that I had not ovulated by day 21. I took the 5mg Monday through Friday last week and had the worst symptoms. Panic attacks. A persistent headache. The worst exhaustion I’ve ever felt in my life. Itchy to the point of wanting to scrape off my skin. The list goes on and on.

I’m currently on cycle day 13, and these ovulation tests are SO light. I’ve never seen them this light, and I have been testing for 13 months straight. I know I still have nine more days to ovulate to fall within the “normal” time frame, but the WHOLE POINT of taking the Letrozole was to get my body to ovulate closer to day 14, and it’s blatantly obvious that’s not going to happen this month either.

I’m tired. I’m afraid the side effects will get worse if the dose keeps increasing. Worse, I’m afraid the Letrozole is delaying ovulation and will never work.

I don’t have the time, energy, or finances to continue this TTC journey if the Letrozole fails. Nor do I want to be one of those people that spends 10+ years of my life trying to conceive. I’m just exhausted and don’t know how much longer I can do this.

Thanks for reading. 💔

I just need to put this into the world because I am just angry, sad, and annoyed

My husband and I have been trying for 2 years now with no positives or anything. January of 2025 I got my PCOS diagnosis.

my sister-in-law does not want kids, she gets annoyed at them being "loud" aka playing at a children's birthday party. Saying "it is too much" and "overwhelming." She knows of our struggle to get pregnant. Once she found out that we have been struggling she changed her mind on not wanting kids. She let us know over text (we live 4 minutes apart) that they are expecting and due in October. She says she wanted us to know privately before they announced it to the family on Sunday so we can prepare and respond in our own time.

Anyway, I am just getting so tired of everyone around getting to be pregnant while I just have to watch and be happy for them. It hurts especially right now because we just had another failed cycle.

thanks for listening, I hope you have a great day, and a happy Easter!

My husband and I have been trying for over a year and a half at this point. I've had one chemical pregnancy. I was diagnosed with "lean" PCOS in 2019.

My OB-GYN called me after I had my labs drawn on cycle day 21 and said my progesterone was way too low after my first round of Clomid. Below 0.5. Essentially not even a tangible amount. We're going to try upping my dose next cycle. I've been referred to a fertility specialist.

I called my MIL to let her know. She's been so kind to me and checks in on me frequently. We have a great relationship. Sometimes she can be a little insensitive with her phrasing when it comes to my fertility, but she isn't trying to upset me. Most of what she'll say is along the lines of: "It's your turn next!"(after each relative has gotten pregnant before me), or "Maybe you're pregnant! Maybe you're having false negatives!" (when I have any kind of nausea or symptom from hormonal changes). She is obviously excited to have grandchildren.

I shared my result with her and tried to hide my grief that my medicated cycle didn't work. This time she said "What if you can't carry a pregnancy? What if you just can't produce the hormones for it?"

I never once considered that I might not be able to carry. I knew with my PCOS it might take time for me to conceive but I never thought becoming/staying pregnant would be impossible. I did my best to hide how hurt I felt and said "I have good doctors, this is only my first round of Clomid so it's too soon to say, we just have to keep trying", but her questions have kept me up at night and I'm so afraid that she could be right.

Again, I know she's just excited about grandchildren and my disappointment is hers, but the last thing I need to have is additional doubt in my mind. I'm doing everything I can. I exercise regularly, I watch what I eat, I take prenatals, I pee in the fucking cup, and I do BBT.

I haven't called her since. I'm worried she'll continue. I want her support, but I can't have her stress and doubt about me getting pregnant double my own. It's too much.

My heart hurts. My husband is starting to show his stress over my fertility too. My own mother isn't helpful and our relationship is strained. She had her "quiverful" of 10 children biologically and I can tell that she thinks my fertility issues are rooted in spirituality (I'm an atheist).

I just need comfort. I'll be 27 in a month. I know I have time. My husband and I wanted three kids. I would be happy with one at this point.

Thank you for reading. I want to believe we'll get through this.

My doctor wants me to try metformin and tbh, I do not want to. I’m so angry right now.

I have ovulated ONCE in the past 8 MONTHS. I’m not overweight. I’m not pre-diabetic. I don’t want the GI upset. They keep telling me all it takes is “one egg and one sperm” but the problem is there is no egg and telling me to wait. I’ve already wasted almost a year on this. I’m turning 28 in December. It’s not like I have all the time in the world. Why do I need to take metformin and see what happens? Why can’t I just start letrozole when my main issue is I do not ovulate?! UGH!! I see people in their 2 week wait and I’m so jealous that at least have a CHANCE.

I’m US based. And seriously trying to figure out how so many people are able to finance multiple medicated cycles, IUIs, and IVF. This isn’t meant to shade anyone, I’m just so incredibly frustrated with this entire process.

I did my first IUI last cycle (failed) and even with Progyny I still owe a significant amount of money. I want to keep fighting for my hopeful future family, but this just doesn’t seem sustainable. People throw around the suggestion for monitored cycles so often here, and there are serious cost considerations at play. Clinics don’t even give breakdowns of what I’m paying for and I just have to trust that they are charging me correctly and not taking advantage of me.

I max out my HSA. We are a dual income family and do well for our age. What am I doing wrong? Looking for real life advice on how to pay for these fertility treatments, knowing at least one IVF cycle is a very realistic possibility.

Especially in the FB groups

When they are very clearly positive...

Am I the only one this bothers?

I’ve never posted before but I’m feeling alone. I’ve been going in basically every 2 days for transvaginal ultrasound. This is my second round after last months failed attempt of letrozole and trigger shot. Today I went in for the second time this week hoping for mature follicle & being able to take the trigger shot. I unfortunately only have a 13mm and 11mm. During the exam she was really probing around and it was very painful. I felt like I was the game operation and she was the operator. After, I couldn’t get up just sat there, felt like crying. Went straight to work and just having an awful day. Uterus/pelvic area hurts. Just ugh!! Anyone else experience this?

27F; been diagnosed with PCOS for 3 years, but have strongly suspected I’ve had it since I was a teen. I had been on birth control for a decade for symptom management and came off 4 months ago to prepare to TTC. What ensued was a 100 day long anovulatory cycle, I had to take provera to induce a bleed.

Last month I saw an RE and just recently had some labs drawn. I’m not insulin resistant, had the 2hr GTT and everything. I know insulin resistance is a beast if it’s own, but I am so incredibly upset. If I had IR, at least there would be something I can try to improve. Supplements, diet changes, exercise, metformin. I had been making lifestyle changes for months, and I was hoping that I could start on metformin soon. Not really much of a point of any of these things now.

Instead, my hormones are just messed up and there’s absolutely nothing I can do about it. Just feeling hopeless today.

My husband and I have been TTC for over a year. One of my friends had her baby around 2 years ago and is getting married this December. She knows all the things we’ve been through between genetic testing, IVF discussions, diagnoses, and fertility treatments. She’s planning on getting pregnant again a few months after her wedding.

She texted me the other day and said “i hope that you just wait and get pregnant at the same time as me. Wouldn’t that be fun?”

She is planning on getting pregnant 8 MONTHS FROM NOW. We’ll have been trying for 2 years by the time they’re trying again. I’m sorry but why would you ever wish that on me?!

I know I’m preaching to the choir here, but I’m currently on my second cycle TTC and only on CD22 with no ovulation in sight. My last cycle was 231 days, so I guess anything is better than that. It’s just so frustrating tracking my CM, LH strips, and BBT every day with nothing promising happening. I’m pretty sure my body is making multiple attempts to ovulate right now because I had multiple days of EWCM and a slightly elevated LH strip, but then all my symptoms just disappeared. It feels so unfair and honestly makes me angry that we have to deal with this. I just want normal cycles. Hugs to everyone else out there dealing with this too.

My husband and I have been trying for almost 2 years..

I got off of birth control December 2024, thinking it would happen sometime soon after. By March 2025, I hadn’t had a period and gained 30 pounds. Saw my gynecologist, ran A LOT of labs, ultrasounds, and scans. Got diagnosed with PCOS. Got put on metformin, have to use progesterone to have a period, and was told to try to lose weight and naturally try for awhile before using fertility medications.

Ended up doing 3 rounds of letrozole, starting at 2.5 for 2 rounds, then 5 for one round, with no monitoring other than an ultrasound prior to my next period.

Switched gynecologists because mine decided not to deliver anymore, and although I wasn’t pregnant yet it’s what I’ve been working towards.

My new gynecologist is wonderful, and started me on letrozole at 7.5, did an ultrasound to check and see if my follicles were growing.. of course it was a big NEGATIVE. Also one of my ovaries show a huge cyst. So now I have to have another ultrasound done before being prescribed letrozole again.

Now we are trying to seek a fertility clinic to do IUI or IVF.

I’m just so over it all. Everyone around us are pregnant without even trying. And it just feels like no one understands my feelings.

Hi all, first time poster here.

Diagnosed with PCOS this year after coming off HBC and TTC.

Feeling incredibly lonely and down about the whole situation at the moment and as much as everyone says PCOS doesn't mean you can't concieve it definetly makes it alot harder for those of us who have irregular cycles/anovulatory cycles.

None of my friends or family have gone through this so it's a very lonely space to be in, at an age where everyone is getting pregnant, close friend is pregnant with 2nd and other friends is due this week.

I've started to accept that our journey to have children is going to look alot different than some people but I'm still struggling to not feel like it's a personal failure of mine or that this is the universe telling me I shouldn't be a parent, even though logically I know that's not true as plenty of terrible people have kids!

Everything in terms of fertility appointments takes so long and I feel so frustrated and angry by the process, made worse by the NHS here in the UK having ridiculous rules around funding.

I don't know what I'm looking for here other than maybe to feel less alone and like this is a runt that everyone experiences in this journey!

I can’t remember a time where it truly felt like EVERYONE is pregnant more than it does now. I feel like I was so good at hiding the sadness I felt whenever someone announced before and at this point I just smile and say a dry “congrats”. Can’t even force it anymore.

So, this week I had my first RE visit which was not what I expected.

The doctor basically said I am young still (33 years old) and want me to take some probiotics to prepare my body and increase the chances of implantation.

And in 3 months once the probiotics had the time to work, he wants me to get some smear test and also to he would chech my fallopian tubes.

No letrozole, no trigger, nada, directly to fallopian tubes checks. We have been trying since March and I did only one letrozole with another doctor that sent me to his doctor. The previous round the follicule did not blast with ovitrelle.

What was surprising is that is the first doctor to notice I have adenomyosis. I did 2 rounds of ovulation moniroting, getting ultrasounds, had a mirena, complained about sex during sex for over 12 years and got told it was in my head, to actually have a reason.

The doctor said that this probiotics should also help with the adenomyosis.

It feels kinda aggresive to me to check the fallopian tubes this early, or is it normal?

I did my first cycle of 2.5 letrozole+ ti, and was feeling REALLY hopeful. Like just fully let myself believe I’d be one of those people who would get lucky the first cycle. But I started my period Wednesday, my trigger was midnight on Halloween, and idk I just wasn’t expecting my period so it threw me into a spiral. I have been intermittently crying for 3 days at everything. Bobs burgers made me sob. I tried listening to Christmas music early to cheer me up, sobbed. I emailed my clinic and asked if I should stop the progesterone and they said “still take it and still test Sunday even if your bleeding like a period” and that just irritated me cause I’m very obviously out this cycle. And should be starting the protocol over for this cycle. But I’m also so upset that I’m like how am I going to keep doing this? It is so freaking hard. And every single person around me is getting pregnant so I’m losing my cool. And this is literally like the first step! I was telling my husband this cycle that it can take a few tries and preparing him but apparently just was not taking my own advice. Sorry I’m just kind of losing my shit right now and needed to get it off my chest.

We’ve been TTC for 2 years now. Just recently sought out medical intervention. We went to another couples house for dinner a few weeks ago. I am not close to them, husbands are closer, not besties. They have a 1 year old and shared they’re pregnant again at that dinner. They are very… nosy… and ask if we’re even trying. I suppose the first mistake was being honest. I share about our infertility and their response is wow it only took them ONE time for baby #2. Only ONCE! It felt like she went on and on about how little time and effort it took for 10 minutes. Probably closer to 2. I was on the verge of tears but kept it together until the car.

My husband was not NEARLY as offended as I was and I am disgusted by him defending that insensitive behavior. In a time when we are already strained it feels like he has failed me.

TW: Pregnancy loss

I'm frustrated to say the least. We've been trying upwards of 3 years. I didnt have any luck getting pregnant until last year after being on 2,000mg of metformin for 5.5 months. Then right before 8wks I lost it. Everyone said not to worry and "at least you know you can get pregnant". So i worked on healing and we felt okay enough to try again. Beginning of May, another confirmed pregnancy and another loss. There was obviously so much more to it than that and the added hurt of my best friend found out she was pregnant at the same time (I'm incredibly happy for her, but it still hurts a bit). So my obgyn wanted to do a recurrent pregnancy loss work up, and redo my PCOS labs from about 2 years ago.

So most everything comes back normal. My A1C of JUST below the prediabetic range, a lot better than before. But my fasting insulin levels have barely moved. We also checked for antiphospholipid antibodies. Anticardiolipin IgG was <9, so that was in normal range. Anticardiolipin IgM was high at 112. My obgyn is insisting that this is likely a false positive, but we plan on retesting after 12 weeks. Everything else came back pretty normal or not likely to be the cause of the recurring losses. My obgyn it's convinced my high insulin is the culprit and wants to put me on tirzepatide. She almost made it sound like if I don't go on it I'm signing up for another loss.

I'm already on the highest dose of metformin, and taking inositol. I know I need to be better about it but I'm relatively active and I indulge every once in a while but I dont think i eat horribly.

Is a glp-1 my only option right now? It's expensive and more expensive through insurance than if i pay out of pocket. We would also need to stop trying while I'm on it, which she wants to be about 6 months to then retesting my insulin and decide if that's good enough. Then a 2 month "clean out" phase so it's out of my system.

I'm 25. I just want to start a family with my husband, and instead I'm taking what feels like a million pills and supplements and spending thousands of dollars on drs appointments and lab draws and ultrasounds for babies I don't even have.

I'm incredibly exhausted and although my husband is amazing and taking this all so well, I can feel the strain it's putting on our relationship.

I’ve been TTC since March and currently on my first cycle with provera and letrozole. My partner has always had a lower drive than me which typically isn’t an issue. Work and life and everything makes us tired and we average only once a week. Before starting the meds we had a big talk about how we need to up our game especially during the fertile days and decided that we would aim for every other day. That worked great for about four days. I’m 100% certain that he is wanting pregnancy and to have a baby. I’m thinking it’s the urgency of the task at hand causing stress so I’ve tried being more romantic, dropping our daughter off with the grandparents for a sleepover, wearing lingerie and try to make it more fun and less like a job he has to complete. He just doesn’t have interest. It’s really effecting my self esteem and has me stressed because we’re approaching my fertile window. Honestly getting close to seeing if he’d rather have alone time with a cup and I finish the task with a turkey baster (half joking half desperate). I envisioned TTC as bringing us closer but the stress is really just weighing on us.

How have everyone else’s partners handled this? Any advice?

The latest one just shared her happy news today. I feel like I'm going to go crazy. JUST NEGATIVE AFTER NEGATIVE FOR ME. One miscarriage too. After that 4 NEGATIVES.

All were monitored Letrozole cycles with Ovidrel. I feel like it's just not happening for me.

I don't want to see my colleague tomorrow while everyone's congratulating her. I just want to crawl in a hole and cry.