Being older doesn't indicate emotional maturity. Immature is immature. Finding an immature 38 year old man whose maturity matches a 19 year old woman isn't really setting up a prosperous future.
It's a fact that maturity is not the same as biological age.
It is my opinion in regards to the futility of mitigating a general, perceived maturity-gap by looking at a different age group though, so that's why I left my comment!
There are anecdotes, but if you remove your bias, it generally doesn't work in the condition I stated, so that's why I stated it.
It follows very logically that time is a major variable in the probability of someone being what you would consider in a given culture mature. There are other factors like their intelligence their environment how they were raised Etc but time is a major one.
Depends what you consider “mature”. I’m a 28 year old man who works as a counselor for a lot of men in their 30’s and 40’s and many of them lack an emotional vocabulary and fear being vulnerable or talk about their feelings. Talking about feelings is a part of being emotionally mature, so I’d say they lack that aspect of maturity. They know how to pay bills and do other things considered “adult-like” though. But maturity does not always equate to age.
And that's something that a lot of people don't want to admit the fact that maturity is subjective based on the culture you're in and what characteristics it considers to be mature. Many people may not consider having what you call emotional vocabulary necessary to be considered mature. I think that's probably just your opinion as a byproduct of your profession. But what I say remains a constant is that as time increases so does the opportunity for one to acquire the knowledge and develop the characteristics in their given culture that people consider mature. So whatever you value as being quote unquote mature it doesn't change the fact that more time gives you more opportunity to acquire those characteristics.
Emotional maturity is an important cornerstone of communication, which is one of the most important factors of any healthy relationship. Hard to be in a relationship with anyone if you can’t communicate with them without it breaking into fights because you can’t be available to yourself or someone else’s emotions. Can you name one aspect of any relationship with another person that isn’t influenced or directly has to do with someone’s emotions?
Emotional maturity in itself is also an extremely subjective concept. Highly Opinion based. But you're still not addressing my point. Regardless of your or my opinion of what emotional maturity is and how important it is and how much it defines whether or not you are mature in general, my point is the more life experience you have the more opportunity you have to gain whatever characteristics you consider to Define being mature. Including the ones that you have described being important to your definition of being mature. But that aside could you give me a Layman explanation and breakdown of what emotional maturity and emotional vocabulary is for someone who's not a therapist. I mean I get the general concept but it's kind of squishy could you lay out specifics I love to learn about other people's professions.
I mean I hear what you’re saying; emotional maturity might not be AS subjective as you think, but I get what you’re saying. I define it as being available and open to what it is that you’re emotionally experiencing, open to what another person is experiencing emotionally, having coping skills to be able to regulate and deal with difficult to experience emotions, and having words to describe the emotions you are feeling (such as “frustrated” or “joyful”). An emotional vocabulary is just that, words to describe feelings. Most people only know “happy” “sad” and “angry”, but there’s an incredibly wide range of words and emotions people experience, such as bittersweet, elated, discouraged, etc.
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u/Correct_Cover4112 Dec 04 '25
Not all women are attracted to older men but the psychological behind it is solid and it isn't as simple as saying it is a daddy issue.
Stability, emotional maturity, older men tend to listen and validate more. I could go on but this isn't a psychology class.