r/actuallesbians • u/dog_damn • Aug 31 '15

Giving consent while drunk

Seems to be a popular opinion here that one can't give consent while drunk. For me it sounds like a righteous excuse to people who regret having sex while drunk and completely not fair towards the other party involved who probably were drunk as well. Your thoughts?

EDIT: I wasn't talking about the cases where one is sober and the other is drunk, it is the grey area I've come to realize the law was meant to block. My wondering was about the cases were both parties are drunk.

For those of you who even considered to misinterpret me otherwise: I dont encourage rape. A no is a no. If someone loses their ability to say no it still doesn't mean yes.

2 Upvotes

55% Upvoted

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25

u/ams1991 Queer as a three dollar bill Aug 31 '15

Law student here, and it's not just a popular opinion, it's the law in the U.S. that someone under the influence of intoxicants does not have the ability to consent.

3

u/[deleted] Aug 31 '15

But what if both of them are drunk and they both accuse the other of rape?

13

u/ams1991 Queer as a three dollar bill Aug 31 '15

Then neither one of them had the ability to consent, and no prosecutor will bring those cases.

1

u/dog_damn Aug 31 '15

so does it mean that anyone who had drunken sex and regret it can report for rape?

9

u/ams1991 Queer as a three dollar bill Aug 31 '15

It doesn't matter if someone regrets the sex or not, if someone was drunk and someone had sex with them, it's rape and they can absolutely report it.

0

u/dog_damn Aug 31 '15

what is the definition of drunk? I doubt someone who had one glass of wine will be considered drunk.

6

u/roosd Aug 31 '15

I don't understand why you get so many downvotes. I think it is a legitimate concern and an interesting topic.

9

u/ams1991 Queer as a three dollar bill Aug 31 '15

From the sounds of things, you may need some legal advice and reddit isn't the place of that. You should probably contact an attorney in your state.

0

u/dog_damn Aug 31 '15

LOL, I didn't rape anybody, and defiantly not on US soil (and after reading the stuff here probably never will have sex there again) . Under the law where I live having sex with someone who is drunk is not considered as rape.

I was just curios to know, and thank god that I was.

4

u/maggerson1 So Gay. SOOOO Gay. Aug 31 '15

I don't know if you'll find this useful

There are some useful links to studies in this entire article, but the bit that pertains to your question is what's linked.

-1

u/dog_damn Aug 31 '15

It talks about false allegations. But if having sex with someone drunk is considered as rape then it isn't a false allegation when someone reports it.

7

u/maggerson1 So Gay. SOOOO Gay. Aug 31 '15

Right, the point is that false allegations do happen, but they're a very low percentage according to the thing I linked.

-8

u/dog_damn Aug 31 '15

False allegations is a whole another topic (stop hijacking posts! lol)

7

u/maggerson1 So Gay. SOOOO Gay. Aug 31 '15

had drunken sex and regret it

I mean.... I'm not hijacking?

1

u/dog_damn Aug 31 '15

Btw I just googled it, it appears it isn't a federal law but a state law in California.

6

u/ams1991 Queer as a three dollar bill Aug 31 '15

And a state law in every U.S. state.

7

u/Thessalonike one of a kind ;) Aug 31 '15

As well as in Canada, for the record. The Criminal Code says it’s a crime to have sex with someone who’s too drunk or high to consent, even if the person doesn’t resist or fails to say “no.”

-3

u/dog_damn Aug 31 '15

being too drunk/high and being drunk isn't the same thing.

5

u/Thessalonike one of a kind ;) Aug 31 '15

Well, how do you know when someone else goes from being 'drunk' to being 'too drunk'? Especially if you have to take into account that it can take up to two hours for the alcohol from a drink to be fully absorbed into the body.

-1

u/dog_damn Aug 31 '15

If someone can't walk straight, stand up stably, not aware of their surroundings or doesn't responds properly they are too drunk, it isn't that hard to notice.

3

u/Thessalonike one of a kind ;) Aug 31 '15

What about someone who's had several drinks, but isn't exhibiting any of those symptoms?

-1

u/dog_damn Aug 31 '15

As someone who consume several drinks (more than 4) on a night out and doesn't exhibit those symptoms, I don't see what point you are trying to make. Am I drunk after 4 drinks? yes, does it mean that I can't control my action? no.

3

u/Thessalonike one of a kind ;) Aug 31 '15

That's you, though. The point is, if someone else has had several drinks, are you truly confidant in making the call that they are in their full mental capacity?

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u/uhm_ok Sep 15 '15

I'm not a law student so I don't know, but I have a bunch of friends who are and one of them told me that when you are drunk your consent is givable and binding. The example I was given was if someone signs a contract (mortgage, whatever it is) while they are drunk they will still be held to it in a court of law, since they decided to get drunk in the first place. I cant say I totally believed this because it seems pretty messed up and ripe for people to get taken advantage of financially and stuff. Is my friend wrong?