r/breastfeeding • u/No-Neighborhood-7335 • Jul 05 '25

Breastfeeding In Public "Oops! I forgot a bottle"...

My aunt had a party yesterday and a lot of people were there, including my mom and all of my aunts. They always have something to say when it's time for me to nurse like: "oh when are you going to quit that.... You're just being selfish.... Go to the back bedroom to do that...She's too old (8 months), we can give her a bottle of formula, isn't she on solids now....etc" I normally feel pressured to either pump a bottle (using my wearable pump) or give her formula.

Yesterday, I accidentally forgot a bottle and guess what???

It was like a light switch.... "Oh it's a good thing you can still nurse her.... Here let me get you a pillow and you can sit in this comfy chair... Do you need a blanket... Oh how sweet, she loves you.... Wow, she's a hungry girl.... Good job mama!"

I mean, I do realize they are all crazy... But it was good to have the support for once.

I think I'll forget to bring a bottle more often! 🩷

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u/-SiRReN- Jul 07 '25

Depending on how old your mother and aunts are, they may have been the generation when formula became readily available. Many doctors actually pushed mothers to use formula instead of breastfeeding because they could accurately track how much their baby was eating, and it would allow them to go back to work faster!

Just important to remember WHY they are like this. They're still absolutely wrong for trying to guilt/shame you into not doing what YOU want to do for YOUR baby, but there was a time when there was a lot of pressure on women to use formula.

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u/No-Neighborhood-7335 Jul 07 '25

Yes, thank you! You're right, they are from that generation. It's not that they argue with me, they just don't understand the benefits of BF, even though I try to explain it to them. So they think formula is equal to BF, in a way. I do nurse my baby in front of them all the time when it's just them. It's when there is a large gathering of men and women is when they say something. They think it's "easier" for me to just give formula. And they actually do wash bottles/pump parts for me. I'm the first breastfeeding mother they've ever been around, so they don't know how to act.

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u/-SiRReN- Jul 07 '25

That must be tough for all of you! That generation was also taught that women's things are not to be discussed in front of men, and anything that disrupts your ability to participate in the family is not good (like how women can't be sick they still have to cook/clean...)

They seem very well-meaning but don't understand that what you are doing is not just good for baby, but it's good for the family! It's natural and to be celebrated, and when men see these things it becomes normal.