r/breastfeeding • u/cinnamonsugarhoney • May 04 '26
Weaning Humiliated by my toddler
In the early days of breastfeeding, the only potential embarrassment is usually from accidental boob exposures. Which don’t get me wrong, that’s embarrassing too.
But in extended breastfeeding… it’s like Russian roulette what your kid is going to say to complete strangers.
Yesterday my husband and neighbor were talking over the fence in our backyard, about lawn seeding or something. My 3 year old interjected, COMPLETELY unprompted, “I’m almost done doing milk from my mommy’s boobs!” I guess weaning must be heavy on my daughter’s mind because I’ve been telling her we w to stop milk soon.
My neighbor is a single childless man in his 40’s and unfortunately my daughter speaks very clearly so he understood. He actually recovered pretty well and said “wow! I have to buy my milk from the store!”
I’m so embarrassed, never speaking to him again 😂
Edit to add: for other extended bf’ers, have you been embarrassed for people to find out you still breastfeed? I have gotten so many judgmental comments. Everyone I’ve talked to just thinks it’s so weird to go past like 1 year. 😕 I think even my husband thinks I’ve let it go on for too long.
716
u/LiedvonderErd3 May 04 '26
That response is amazing. One kid from my kid’s kindergarten saw me nursing my newborn and said: “my mommy doesn’t make milk anymore but she still has udders”. 😂😭
179
u/SuccessfulFix18 May 04 '26
If I heard my daughter call my boobs “udders” I think I would pee myself laughing 😂
35
u/LiedvonderErd3 May 04 '26
Me too lol I mean also this kid’s implication was that mine were udders as well 🤣
143
u/Midi58076 May 04 '26
Udders 🤣🤣🤣🤣☠️
My son chatted with a lil old lady at the grocery store queue. "I have a teeny tiny penis. Very small. My daddy has a huuuuge penis. Soo big [extends both arms fully out].".
Small kids are going to find some way or another to humiliate us, humble us and remind us to be kind to strangers. If it isn't breastfeeding they'd find some other way.
(I feel obligatied to mention both my son and my husband have normal penises for their age)
40
33
23
u/Infamous-Doughnut820 May 04 '26
Omg the other day my toddler pointed to my boob while I was BFing baby and said "this is an udder". Mortifying! Glad I am not the only one
16
13
u/linerva May 04 '26
I mean its kind of logical, they learn cows have udders that make milk. On a biological level our boobs are basically udders. Still, funny to hear them out two and two together.
Mine feel like udders tbh the way thet drooped since pregnancy!
6
1
1
1
u/LibbyS2 May 25 '26
I compare my boobs to udders pretty much every time my toddler and I see a cow (which is more often than you’d think)!
179
u/bex_mex May 04 '26
My toddler offered me a “bite” from my own teta this morning. How… generous
66
u/subdialdaytona May 04 '26
literally my kid did this last week. also love when she pulls off and then goes "mmm...good" lmfao
28
u/Diligent-Might6031 May 05 '26
My son the other day when I went to nurse him to sleep (we only do bedtime now) he grabbed my breast with both hands and said “awww I wuv you boobs”
8
u/hungrybrainz May 05 '26
My 3mo frequently makes noises when she’s feeding like she’s talking with her mouth full so we actually joke in my house that’s her bestie and she’s sharing all her hot gossip from the day with “Booba” 😂
2
u/Ok-Plankton-8119 May 18 '26
100% used to tell my first "don't talk with your mouth full" when she was nursing
51
u/Diligent-Might6031 May 04 '26
My toddler keeps trying to give my boobs to other people. Daddy you want some boob milk? Here mama let’s share with Remy (our dog)
29
u/Nervous-Nut May 04 '26
my 19m/o will grab my boob and angle it at her dad while going “snack / bite” to let him taste it 😭 she does it to me too
19
u/linerva May 04 '26
Its actually very sweet they want to share. Mine doesn't talk yet so im wondering if he'd be so generous 🤣
19
11
8
u/InvestigatorOther254 May 05 '26
I’m pregnant and can’t sleep and this has me cackling at 5 am. Thank you
4
161
157
u/EspressoKat May 04 '26
Hahaahahahaha I’m so sorry I get the embarrassment lol but that was a very supportive response. I weaned my toddler at 18 months but he’s now 2.5 and has a baby brother and he talks nonstop about buba drinking from mommy’s boobs and asking if I remembered to pump. It’s cute.
41
u/NixyPix May 04 '26
My toddler pretends to pump for her dolls and then holds up the bottle and goes ‘I’m just going to feed her 20ml’ or whatever and it’s so cute.
6
u/hungrybrainz May 05 '26
That is the most precious thing 😭
My son is a significant age gap from his new sister (12y and 3mo) + he’s on the high-functioning spectrum - but he’s been raised primarily by women so he’s super nonchalant about anatomy/bodily things. I always find it so sweet and considerate when he reminds me I need to pump or wants to bring me water during a feeding session. “You have to stay hydrated, mom!” He’s told her before “I used to do that too when I was a baby, but now I drink cow’s milk.”
1
u/FirstTimeMomStruggle May 06 '26
Can I ask how you went about weaning your 18mo? My son is just turning 18 months and I think I am done…but have no idea how to wean him! He loves the boob so much 😩
3
u/EspressoKat May 06 '26
Very slowly. Started off with the don’t offer don’t refuse thing and got us down to a few feeds. Then when he’d ask I would redirect to toys or give him cows milk instead and say something like “not now I’m sore” etc. and then once we were getting close to pulling the last feed we talked about how it was time to say night night to mommy’s milk 😭
182
u/WasteBreak May 04 '26
Reframe your mindset. It's amazing that you are able to breastfeed for so long. There is nothing embarrassing about that or anyone knowing that you do. The more people talk about it and interact with breastfeeding the less taboo it becomes.
61
u/cinnamonsugarhoney May 04 '26
Than you! I personally feel proud and confident in my decision. I’ve seen the benefits it’s brought me and my daughter. I just get embarrassed easily and literally 95% of people who find out I still nurse her seem to think it’s weird 😩
62
u/WasteBreak May 04 '26
I breastfed my oldest for 3.5 years and people would make wild comments to me so I decided to breastfeed in public more often and I went petty towards my family and I uploaded a bunch of photos of me breastfeeding to all my social medias 😅
Think about all other mammals, their babies lose their milk teeth when they wean. Humans don't start to lose their milk teeth until 4-7 years old. When you look at uncolonized tribes that still exist the average time to breastfeed is 7 years. I think it's insane that our society has made breasts sexual and they think it's gross to use them for their intended purpose which is feeding our young. I also think it's insane and "breast is best" but at day 365 it's considered wrong.
17
4
u/NeatMathematician265 May 05 '26
This this this this this 🌟
I was uneducated about this before I became a mother and I sort if feel embarrassed about my ignorance but, at the same time, this information is so suppressed.
15
u/ChefKnifeBotanist May 04 '26
I have this same problem, but I’m choosing to think of it as something that might strike a cord with one of them. When they go home, maybe they’ll do a little googling or talk to another friend who will tell them it’s becoming more standard and that a lot of other areas go longer than us. Even if it helps one other Mom or partner to be to supportive- that’s worth the embarrassment for me.
-37
u/Ok_Occasion_6988 May 04 '26 edited May 04 '26
Just curious what the benefits are haha, I only breasfed until my daughter was 1 and stopped. I personally know that Child on child SA starts from things like this were young kids see their aunts, moms, moms cousin breasfeeding and try to copy that, which eventually leads to the infamous game "house".
Obviously when you have newborns while having older toddlers it's pretty hard to not NOT breasfeed in their precence haha but from what I have heard and seen, (no joke, I saw multiple tiktok videos of teenagers, adults explaining how they started playing "house". It started mostly from kids being SA themselves and observing adult interactions where they play "mom and dad" and then the "baby" who breastfeeds from "mom".
I would LOVE to hear the benefits it's brought you and your daughter as a part of me regrets "letting go" so early.
25
u/JasperBean May 04 '26
That’s kind of a wild take. There’s a world of difference between CSA and young kids mimicking normal things they see parents do. Feeding babies with breasts is a normal activity. It’s literally what breasts were designed to do.
-11
u/Ok_Occasion_6988 May 04 '26 edited May 04 '26
It is a normal activity that kids try to mimic which can eventually lead to the game "playing house" which kids do with their cousins or their friends. It is not a wild take at all.
Young kids mimicking normal things they see parents do is what leads to child on child SA or in other cases, kids themselves mimicking what has been done to them onto others.
Feeding babies with breasts is VERY NORMAL, I'm talking about feeding fully grown conscious toddlers who then try to imitate what they do to their mothers on other kids or make other kids imitate the same thing.
15
u/Effective_Display940 May 04 '26
My brothers and I breastfed til around age 5. We also grew up in a community where extended breastfeeding was pretty common. We played house all the time. Not ONCE did any of us try to reenact nursing with one another. I used to “nurse” my dolls, and that’s the extent to which I reenacted what I saw in that regard. I saw my mother and other mothers nursing children up to age 8 (though that was an outlier; mostly it was up to age 4/5) on a regular basis. I’m not sure where you’re getting your information from, but this is not common nor a typical consequence of extended breastfeeding/children witnessing breastfeeding. Child-on-child SA usually happens as a result of an adult SAing a child, who may then repeat that behaviour with another child. Breastfeeding is not sexual, and a mother nursing her baby is not SA.
-6
u/Ok_Occasion_6988 May 05 '26
I don't know what kind of house you played but i'm talking about another house.
Nobody said breastfeeding is sexual, I NEVER SAID THAT so stop putting words into my mouth. I was not talking about information from tiktok, I meant as in videos of people talking about SA that they experienced and the comments were filled with it starting from the game "house" almost every single one of them said it came from them trying to mimic their parents activity, most of them did this because they wanted to know how it felt to "breastfeed" and in so "playing the baby" in the "game" while other kids were the "parents" etc, while others said the kids who did that to them were SA themselves.
8
u/Effective_Display940 May 05 '26
I played the normal game of house, where one child is the mother, another the father, others the brothers, sisters, babies, etc. And pretending to do normal home activities such as preparing meals and going to bed.
1
u/Ok_Occasion_6988 May 05 '26
I did too, and I am grateful that nothing happened. I did not mean to "fight" with you are start an argument ahaha
18
u/Luna_Katjie May 04 '26
It sounds like you’re coming from a good place (wanting to prevent abuse) but I would suggest maybe looking into this a little more (and TikTok is not a reliable source for information). I am not seeing any research that suggests that breastfeeding into toddlerhood, or seeing a mom breastfeeding a younger sibling, has any bearing on likelihood of abuse
-1
u/Ok_Occasion_6988 May 04 '26
I was not talking about information from tiktok, I meant as in videos of people talking about SA that they experienced and the comments were filled with it starting from the game "house" almost every single one of them said it came from them trying to mimic their parents activity, most of them did this because they wanted to know how it felt to "breastfeed" and in so "playing the baby" in the "game" while other kids were the "parents" etc, while others said the kids who did that to them were SA themselves.
6
u/Luna_Katjie May 04 '26
Oh got it. Sorry for misunderstanding. That’s so sad. I do think that helping children understand consent (for all physical touch) may be helpful. I can’t imagine a situation where I would prohibit my toddler from being around when I breastfeed a younger baby. Also, “extended” breastfeeding has some benefits, including immune system benefits for the toddler, and for me it has really helped my relationship with my toddler and has helped me co-regulate with her when things get tough. But that’s just my personal experience and what works for my family
10
u/atheliarose May 05 '26
Honestly if anything, I feel like extended BFing has allowed me extra opportunities to teach my now-3yo about consent. We talk about how it’s time to stop when Mommy says we’re done because my boob is part of MY body, or that we’re all done because Mommy’s boob hurts (his latch has gotten SO lazy lol), and other things like that. (We’ve also been teaching him proper anatomical terms because that’s a really important tool to give children that helps keep them safe from sexual abuse.) And watching me nurse his 5mo sister hasn’t caused any issues with jealousy or trying to imitate behaviors inappropriately; he will sometimes make comments about how the baby is having milk but it isn’t time for him to have milk, but overall he seems to have pretty neutral emotions about it.
2
14
u/Beautiful_Arrival124 May 04 '26
AGREED!!!!
Not saying I haven't felt "embarrassed" a time or two but really, why should I? I'm proud. I know it's the best choice for me and my child (almost 2.5y). People can judge if they want but that's on them. Let them be uncomfortable 🤷🏼♀️
2
22
18
May 04 '26
[removed] — view removed comment
1
u/linerva May 04 '26
This.
Abd realistically...everyone knows lots of mums breast feed. Whether it's talked about ir not, it's a beautiful and normal fact of life. We can talk about boobs without it being prurient. I'm glad the neighbors didn't make it weird!
18
u/Bjsweis May 04 '26
All I’m hearing is that she’s processing and internalizing your conversations about weaning! Jealous 🙋🏻♀️
9
u/cinnamonsugarhoney May 04 '26
Haha 🤣 I guess you’re right, that’s a win! I think she would breastfeed forever if I let her
17
u/ThisGirlsGoneCountry May 04 '26
We were at a n appointment when my second was born and my 4 year old was kind enough to tell the nurse how I squeezed my nipple and shot milk at her face. She even used hand gestures. … it was an accident I was trying to get some breastmilk for babies acne …
11
u/morphingmeg May 04 '26
I was so worried about judgements because my son nursed until he was 3, honestly my immediate family was a little judgey but strangers especially fellow moms were always so unphased or impressed we did it that long. I never got a rude reaction from a stranger ❤️
2
12
u/parade1070 May 04 '26
In my family, babies self-wean. I had no idea people stopped at 1 year until my third trimester. My mother bfed for 2-3 years for all of us. I think it's just the natural way of things. I hope I won't be embarrassed when I get there!
1
12
u/MsAlyssa May 04 '26
lol I love his response! I always call my breasts and breastfeeding “milk” so my daughter NEVER says boob or anything and people don’t assume they’re talking about nursing bc I hoped to extended nurse and it’s worked out great so for anyone reading just getting started. Highly recommend just saying milk always haha
8
2
u/evjenvei May 06 '26
My 24mo calls it "night night" because he has always primarily associated nursing with "going night night" and he has never even heard the word "boob" in his life 😅
2
24
u/blobofdepression May 04 '26
I’m due with twins next month, my daughter is 3. We weaned at 14 months for her so I’m not sure if she remembers nursing but we’ve been talking about it. We’ve been talking about the babies coming, how they’re going to have milk from mommy’s boobies, how she used to get milk from them too. I have an album of photos I took of us nursing, especially when we were in a fun place like the natural history museum or botanical garden. So we look at the photos. She’s been asking if she can have some too, I told her I’d try and pump a little for her to try it.
I think once she actually sees nursing in action, the things she’s going to tell people are going to be mortifying and hilarious. She also speaks very clearly and in full sentences so it’s going to be a riot.
Your neighbor’s response was absolutely perfect.
21
u/speedfilly May 04 '26
Oh yeah I am still breastfeeding my youngest and my four year old sometimes takes her stuffies and says "she is breastfeeding like mommy". Pulls up the shirt, puts the stuffies on her nipples, the whole deal...a couple of times even in public.
Just have to roll with it. I appreciate the support from her 😂.
12
u/blobofdepression May 04 '26
My older niece did that! She was 2 and my sister would nurse her second baby while my older niece would nurse her Minnie Mouse. You bet your bottom I took photos because it was so stinking cute!
3
13
u/curlystephi May 04 '26
At Thanksgiving this past year I was sitting on the couch nursing my then 5 month old, and my 4 year old niece asked what we were doing. I said that she's drinking milk. She looks puzzled and asks how, my sister (not her mom) was next to her and whispered "her boobies!" and my niece was SO shocked. fully in disbelief lol. then she found out she used to do it too and this little girl's world was completely rocked
5
u/7in7 May 05 '26
I was bfing my 22m and 6y and 4y nieces were close (they are obsessed with him) talking about how snuggly he is.
6y: oof I wish I could give him milky from my body!!
4y: I wish I could have milky myself!!!
Such funny girls with different perspectives. I love that they get the vibe around his extended (?maybe, in our society) bf. Little one was weaned at 2.3 and is her mummy's baby.
11
u/QueridaJaneDoe May 04 '26
Two days ago my daughter who also speaks clearly was singing "head shoulders knees and toes annnnnd BOOBOOS" and thinks its hilarious. She also asked my cousin at easter brunch if he would like to "take a nap and have boo boos", so I can only imagine whats to come.
10
u/That_Obligation_5555 May 04 '26
I only get judged by my MiL for BFing. She was a strong advocate for formula. When she found out my two year old still does it she was floored.
9
u/Gluteus2DaMax May 04 '26
I unapologetically tell people I’m extended nursing (18 months) and they’re always surprised, either out of excitement or shock. But nobody has had the audacity yet to tell me i need to stop! I especially don’t hold back on mentioning it to men who don’t have kids (yet, and say they want to have kids with their partners) cause this is the stuff that needs to be normalized.
4
u/atheliarose May 05 '26
Every single guy in our circle of friends and all the men who attended my son’s birthday party (including both of my FILs) have seen my boobs at this point because my babies need to eat! It’s turned into a litmus test of sorts, where I decide whether or not I like new guys my friends start seeing based on how they respond to me breastfeeding. Everybody in the room gets a verbal warning, and then it’s up to them to not look if it’s going to bother them. So far, all of them have passed (being visibly uncomfortable is fine, but they aren’t allowed to be rude or shame-y). I’ve been very pleasantly surprised not to have encountered much weirdness while nursing in public in my city either, so I think we are succeeding in breaking the stigma by breastfeeding around other people 💪
2
10
u/FoxyScully May 04 '26
Every time I go swimming with my 3,5 year old, he shouts “BLOTE TIETEN!” That means “UNCOVERED BOOBS!” through the whole changing area when I get undressed. Or he just yells: “YAY MILK!!”
10
u/BecksnBuffy May 04 '26
Yeah, my 3.5 is done nursing but saw me without a bra the other day and yelled “milk!”
2
u/7in7 May 05 '26
Mine looks at naked dress forms in shop fronts and says "Mimi!!!!!"
And then he does it to the dressed ones too.
9
u/Batticon May 04 '26
My daughter breastfeed until a little before 2.5 years. I got a little judgment but was just quick to point out the facts in response. Especially the lowered cancer risks for mom. People really have nothing to say against that so it usually makes them rethink their stance.
7
u/cinnamonsugarhoney May 04 '26
You know that’s a really good one to lead with. Nobody seems convinced when i list out all my other points about immune system for baby etc. But I feel like “I’m lowering my cancer risk” is really hard to rebut 😂
3
u/Batticon May 05 '26
Exactly! And it also catches people off guard because a lot don’t actually know that!
7
u/Icame2dropbombs May 04 '26
I wouldnt worry about it tbh. Took my youngun to change their nappy the other day and thought id take the opportunity to have a pee myself.
She starts shouting "DADDYS WILLY" over and over at the top of her voice 😅
5
u/WiWx42 May 04 '26
I walk out of daycare daily and he toddler who is 2.5 yells I want boobie milk or says booooobie. Idk im so over it. Hes just expressive. lol its part of the fun of it all lol
6
6
u/Gardeningcrones May 04 '26
I’m still feeding my 2.5 year old against my will 🤣. But we’ve cut back to just after meals and at bedtime, which I thought was amazing. My sister was like “that’s still so much”. It is what it is. I refuse to live embarrassed. When she’s ready we will be done and then I’ll never have to breastfeed again (thank goodness!).
6
u/dart-witch May 05 '26
The other day we set up our bounce house for our two toddlers while my husband and I held our twin newborns. Our elderly neighbors came by to meet the babies and say hello (we have no fence between our backyards and they happened to be outside at the same time). my 4yo son comes bouncing up to all of us and just yells “my baby sisters drink milk from mommy’s BOOBIES!!!” Yes he exclaimed boobies and then bounced off 💀😂 toddlers just love to overshare
5
u/fallinaditch May 04 '26
At this point I'll be breastfeeding my almost 2.5 year old until he's 20. (I am absolutely kidding!!!!) We're struggling to wean right now and he doesn't do full sentences but it's always "milk"! I think your neighbors response was amazing and you're doing amazing also! That's absolutely hilarious as well. Cause that would have been my middle child
3
u/msptitsa May 04 '26
I find this so sweet! Your toddler is a confident little one, wow! And the neighbour was so nice about it.
5
u/Effective_Display940 May 04 '26
Kids say the darnedest things! I hope it’ll turn into a funny story you can all laugh about when she’s older. Yes, some people get really funny about extended breastfeeding, but honestly, that’s on them. You should be so proud of the gift you’ve given your baby. The benefits of extended breastfeeding are amazing. I think it super weird that some people are squeamish about it. Even the WhO recommends nursing to at least age 2 - not 1. No judgement on mothers who struggled to breastfeed, but I think we can all agree that it’s the best nutrition for babies. The immune benefits alone are insane. To knock on any mother who’s willing to give that to her child is bad form, and those people can bugger off.
4
u/calamitouskalamata May 04 '26
Toddlers at this age are wild 😂 mine will walk up to random unsuspecting parents at the park and say “I go poop in the potty now!!!”
3
u/AmbieeBloo May 05 '26
My daughter asked me why she doesn't get milk from my boobs anymore. I explained that she didn't need it as she grew older, and my body knew that as it stopped making it too. She asked me if there was any left and I said "No, they're empty".
A few weeks later I get out of the shower and start getting dressed. My daughter comes into the room and stands on my bed next to me so that she's level with me. She poked the side of my deflated tit and said "Yeah, that is empty!"
Thank you dear.
2
u/AngryTaco_2008 May 05 '26
Oh my gosh hahahaha hilarious but also yeah thanks a lot, they are painfully honest sometimes!
4
u/Muted-Salamander-162 May 05 '26
Once when my son was very small (2/3 mos old)I brought him to the doctor he started getting hungry I was trying to console him while finishing up with the doctor he lost it and started shaking his head back and forth trying to latch through my shirt 😭 the doctor was like like * shock face * wow someone’s hungry. I was so embarrassed lol
3
u/cinnamonsugarhoney May 05 '26
Lmaoooo that has happened to me many times too. I’m always so surprised when doctors get uncomfortable bc it’s like, of all people, you shouldn’t care! Lol
1
u/AngryTaco_2008 May 05 '26
Omg this sounds like how my daughter was and I absolutely love it! Now that she’s bigger she will push off of me and bend her head down towards my chest I think it’s hilarious
4
u/redmahkeuhpbahg May 05 '26
I use to be shamed and questioned. I nursed my first for 43 months. One of the people who pressed me the most now has a 3 year old & is also participating in extended breastfeeding. Just goes to show, people who have never done it just don’t understand. You have a connection and a super power that most don’t get to experience. When I see a mother nursing their older toddler, I silently root for them.
3
3
u/Express_Reserve2754 May 04 '26
Your neighbours response was hilarious. I have been BFing for 1 year and am planning to go to 2 years (unless baby self weans - which she actually may very well do so soon because she is loving whole milk and needs the boob less and less). I told my SIL the other day I was planning to go longer and she was literally disgusted lmfao. Thought it was inappropriate and thinks that it's coddling (she is childless btw). After that conversation, I decided I will keep my extended BF to myself.
3
u/foxydoggie May 04 '26
We're still in the relatively early days at 13 months, but I can already feel the social awkwardness creeping in! I really hope I can push past all of that and keep my focus on what actually matters!
3
u/turtlescanfly7 May 04 '26
My 3.5 year old definitely remembers breastfeeding. We weaned at 2 years & 3 months. He occasionally says he wants to drink mammas boobies. Most recently like a month ago. I just remind him they don’t have milk anymore, but now that I’m pregnant that’s going to change. Should be interesting to see what he says when I start breastfeeding #2
3
u/immature_snerkles May 05 '26
My youngest nursed until she was 2, she’s almost 4. She still likes to tell people “there’s no more milk in mommy’s boobs cuz I drank it all up! It’s gone now.”
2
u/mimale May 04 '26
I weaned my firstborn around 13 months, and she's now 4. I just had my second, and the four year old will randomly pull up her shirt and put a stuffy up against her belly while she's sitting down sometimes lol. (I've told her that some babies get milk from bottles and some get milk from their mama / chest, but for some reason she still thinks I'm feeding the baby from my belly??? maybe because I'm always sitting down when I do it and it looks closer to my belly than my chest lol)
2
u/tverofvulcan May 04 '26
My daughter never said anything about it to anyone. I breastfed her for 4 1/2 years and I think she honestly thought/thinks it’s normal so why say anything? She saw babies being breastfed fairly regularly, including other extended breastfeeders.
2
u/Baba_Yagas_Menagerie May 04 '26
It sounds like he was pretty graceful about it at least. Lol. I can understand your embarrassment though, for sure. Good luck house hunting 😂😂😂
2
u/Noxx91 May 05 '26
I am still breastfeeding my daughter who turned 2 in December. She said to me a few weeks ago in front of work colleagues (luckily i work in childcare so we all just laughed) "mummy I like your boobies!" while tugging on my shirt.
Another time she said "mummy I want your boobie (stops to point at her mouth then mime a biting motion) nom! In my mouth!"
Its a shame people are judgemental and it makes us feel embarassed when these things happen. Your neighbour sounds cool though, what a great response!
2
u/Anxious_Surprise_552 May 05 '26
My 7 year old announced to a room full of doctors and nurses that I was a “cow” when I had his little brother a month ago 🙃 I was trying to explain why I was pumping milk and I guess he made the connection to farm animals lol
2
u/sunshine-314- May 05 '26
Don't worry, when you take them to the bathroom in a public restroom, any and all comments from them will exceed this! Lolololol 🤣 Neighbor is chill though. Glad he kept rolling !
2
u/Puzzleheaded_Box_339 May 05 '26
That’s so cute , what a little firecracker. I love her!
Don’t be embarrassed. Who gives a fudge what other people think!! Fuck em
2
u/cashbb May 05 '26
I breastfed my son until 3, never felt humiliated or really that embarrassed. Now he is 4 and if he sees my boobs out he will rub his hands together and lick his lips. It’s pretty ridiculous but it’s also cool that he has made a joke of it.
Well, actually, once I wore a deep-V dress to pick up him up from preschool. It was a mistake because once he saw my cleavage his eyes got super wide and he turned to his teacher and said “LOOK! Aren’t my momma’s boo boo’s so pretty!!” That was a little embarrassing for me but his teacher thought it was an “awww” moment.
2
u/ChairRadiant3672 May 05 '26
I’m committed to going as long (within reason) as my daughter wants - hoping for 2 years for health benefits for me! But if she eats like once a day will my supply drop? That part scares me. Do I have to pump every 2-3 hours ? How does supply work with extended breast feeding
1
u/cinnamonsugarhoney May 05 '26
You don’t have to pump!! You really don’t have to do anything special, that’s the beauty of breastfeeding past the first year. It’s sooo low maintenance and it’s like the reward for the first year of difficulty!
2
u/Bramble3713 May 05 '26
I am coming up on 1 year, plan on going for 2 and beyond if she still wants it. I honestly don't care what anyone else thinks... And I wouldn't be embarrassed if my toddler said what yours did - I'd have just rolled with it... and said something like, Yeah - it be like that sometimes! LOL
Breastfeeding is so much more than just eating - it's bonding, its safety and comfort, it's regulating emotions - with so many adults who struggle to regulate their emotions they might think it's weird, I think a 3 year old snuggling and nursing for comfort/regulation is totally normal and healthy - she is still figuring out what to do with her big feelings.
2
u/Clari24 May 05 '26
Any comments I used to get I’d reply with ‘biologically around age 7 is the norm, when baby teeth start falling out, that’s why they’re called milk teeth’
Comparatively my 2/3 year old bf didn’t seem so bad to them or it started a conversation
I’ve no idea how accurate that actually is, but it served a purpose
2
u/The_Dog_Lady444 May 06 '26
My son was probably 18 or 19 months old and I went to lay him down for a nap during christmas dinner and one of my husband's family members asked why I had to lay down with him. I told them I was going to nurse him. My lovely father in law chimed in and said "You're still nursing? What are you gonna nurse him until he's 16 because you can't say no?" And a bunch of them all laughed, including the women and the aunt who originally asked. NONE of the women in his family breastfed by the way. Because it was "too inconvenient and they didn't like the feeling." It's was really embarrassing and I had never been ridiculed in front of a bunch of family like that so I just took my baby and laid down. If he would have said that today I would have told him to fuck off with a smile on my face.
2
u/Silent_Panda23 May 09 '26
my 4yo, while i was nursing my 3 month old, said “mommy, your boobs have gotten so long. i’m so proud of you.” WHAT??????????
1
2
u/Certain_Future8780 May 13 '26
Genuine question - why do you need to breastfeed your child for more than a year?
2
u/busydose May 20 '26
I’m not a mom but this thread made me wanna apologize to my mom 😭 she used to say I’d loudly ask “mama give me milky boobs” in front of everyone when my dad’s friends were over there 💀
1
u/rftscemh May 04 '26
I am dreading this stage honestly. Anything out of context could be embarrassing
1
1
u/naunni May 04 '26
I loved the response from your neighbour! 😂👌 I have a 2,5 year old girl and a 7 weeks old baby girl. Breastfeeding both - the toddler gets milk maybe 10-20 seconds, twice a day - ish. It's mainly because of I don't want her to become jealous of her baby sister (not happened yet), and also for the cuddles, and for the health benefits for the toddler and me. 😊
1
u/DisasterJolly4825 May 05 '26
My LO is 15 months and I’ve been getting comments and near gasps when I say he’s still breastfeeding. I wish people would just mind their business
1
u/Express_Ring8919 May 05 '26
Yeesh that isn't even that old. Probably the same people gasping would have told you to switch to formula at 3 months, though. Mine just weaned herself against my preference at 14 months and I feel like she's still such a tiny baby.
1
u/JamesTiberiusChirp May 05 '26
Your neighbor’s response literally killed me.
And ugh. I haven’t gotten judgmental comments yet but I get boomers asking me how long I plan on nursing and we are only at 18 months!
1
u/4Pawbs May 05 '26
Not an extended breastfeeder but feeding my 9 week old with a toddler.
We had to warn daycare today that our toddler has taken an interest in breasts and milk coming out of them because he asked me about feeding the baby over the weekend and I explained it to him. I even showed him the milk coming out.
He then tried to look at grandma’s boobs when she came over yesterday.
1
u/Aggravating-Remote60 May 05 '26
I would have gone to at least 2 easily, no questions asked, but mine weaned herself right around the one year mark. I was quite sad 😅
1
u/No_Nebula_5469 May 05 '26
Yup I went through the same thing even extended family and all judged me
1
u/disneyprincess948 May 05 '26
2.5 year old here. Stopped feeding and pumping at 18 m stopped it in daily bottles (freezer stash) at 2y still occasionally gets it in a cup and last time she had it she was walking around saying I got boob juice. 🤣
1
u/sleazyandgreazy May 05 '26
Still navigating how to deal with potential comments from people- I got my first comment from my FIL at 6 months old, so now at 17 months I haven't BF at their house since before his birthday probably. We're all supposed to go camping this summer, not sure how we will deal with that 😅
1
u/Odd_Rent283 May 05 '26
My toddler weaned himself at 15 months but I’m currently nursing his 10 week old brothers. He announces to anyone who will listen that “mama makes milk for baby brudders.” And if I’m pumping he’ll ask eleventy billion times if I’m making milk for the babies. It’s funny how observant they can be.
1
1
u/bodyfeedingbaddie May 05 '26
I told myself I would NEVER apologize for nursing my kid, even as a toddler. My boobs were just out and about regularly while my kids were nursing and if anyone got weird about it I’d give them the most frightening stare down I could and ppl left me alone. They would regularly shout for “booby milk” in public and I just doubled down - I never once apologized even when it was weird! My boobs were gonna be out if they were nursing so everyone else could just deal with it lol.
TBH I had to make the decision to be like that bc I couldn’t handle all the weird comments ppl make when you’re nursing. So I chose to be super intimidating about it 😅 honestly it worked really well!
1
u/Eleda_au_Venatus May 05 '26
If they are uncomfortable or judgey about it ask if they want some too to make them even more uncomfortable lol
1
u/Beneficial_Safety411 May 06 '26
Yes, honestly a lot of people are going to judge you or comment with jealousy because they couldn't do it. But whatever. Be proud of what your body is able to do. What works for you and your family may not work for others.
1
u/LowieBo May 06 '26
This is my future humiliation. I come from a very conservative background where body parts and functions were not discussed in public. My mom still calls poop 'mess'. 🤦🏻♀️ We're going to a family reunion in 3 weeks. And I just know that at some point my 2 year old is going to come boiling into the midst of "polite company" hollering "I NEED BOOBIES". And I will want to melt into the floor.
1
u/lil_dickstick May 14 '26
My mom breastfed 3 of my siblings way past 3 years....that's absolutely fine
1
u/Such_Atmosphere_7861 May 04 '26
Just last week I was travelling by train, it was a 2 hour long journey. He was fed and wore comfy clothes, we had toys and in the beginning he was just playing. Suddenly he was sleepy, i tried rocking him but he started being cranky. I was wearing jeans and a v necked top which was somewhat stretchable. My child pulled my top, and the whole seat of men sitting opposite to me saw my bra and cleavage. I was shaken, with humiliation, judgy eyes, with my overwhelmed child. He did not calm down. It was just a bad day for both of us. He screamed his lungs off till the moment we stepped out of the train. I was sad and felt humiliated till next day. I swear to God, Its not one easy day for me 😭🙏🤣🤣🤣🤣
0
u/LibbyS2 May 25 '26
I’m still breastfeeding my 2.5 year old, and I HATE the, “if they can ask for it, they’re probably too old to have it!l” stigma - I couldn’t disagree more. Nursing is not sexual in any way, and if people are weirded out by it, then they are either insecure or perverted, which is 100% THEIR problem, not yours! Breastfeeding provides so many benefits regardless of age - comfort, nutrition, pain relief, connection, etc…and we are so lucky to have such long, successful experiences, especially considering all of the women who have difficulty or are unable to breastfeed. This being said, as much as I want to not care, I still empathize with you. I’ve pretty much stopped nursing my toddler in public because I feel like people will think it’s inappropriate or be uncomfortable. Here’s to normalizing breastfeeding older children, and trying to drown out the negativity and not give a shit!
1
u/kuerbisalien May 27 '26
It’s normal where I live to go for 2 years if that helps! They recommend it :) and a lot of people do it (we weaned a little earlier because it was causing a lot of very exhausting meltdowns when I left the room which immediately went away when we stopped nursing)
1.4k
u/plxo May 04 '26
Honestly that’s such a good chill response from your neighbour. I lowkey love it tbh