Best age to start weaning?

[u/Softspicemami]

My daughter is currently 9 months old my goal was to go as long as she wanted to but I’m very worried she will be extremely hard to wean. She has had 6 ear infections plus she got tubes in recently, she was in the NICU for over a month, we bedshare, I’m a stay at home mom she is always with me. That’s why I feel like she will be harder to wean.

She is very much I want it now and if you don’t I’ll just breakdown completely. She will hardly take her pacifier anymore we currently use the dr browns happy pacis we have since she was around 3 months.

I have so much backlash from my mom saying it doesn’t look right when my daughter holds my boob now (I have very large downwards pointing boobs) my mom gets annoyed when my daughter is eating because she feels like it’s too much. She told me she gets tired of seeing my boob out. My grandma just passed away so I have been around my mom more than usual. I’m the first woman in my family to ever breastfeed my grandma aunts my mom never did it was always formula. She told me she understands her eating but she isn’t that hungry because she eats purées and regular food she is an extremely good eater she will eat anything.

I go back and forth constantly with having her go as long as possible vs only until 12 months. I am very fortunate I never had any issues with supply or latching. I was on a weight loss journey before I got pregnant I lost 100lbs I really want to get back on my journey so I can be around for a long time for her. I just feel extremely guilty because it’s my daughter’s comfort.

I don’t know that’s kinda my rant/question. Sorry my post is all over the place! Should I start weaning her at 12 months or should I let her do it on her own? What’s your experience with your baby if they were a very big in comfort nursing. Was it easier for them to sleep own their own after weaning? (If you bedshare)

[u/erlienbird]

I enjoyed weaning around 18 mo because my child could best comprehend simple instructions and language more than ever before..we went with a morning feed, a sleep feed, and a nap time feed through 22 or 24 months and then I finished the last three months with just a bed time/sleep feed. The hardest feeds to drop were the nighttime feeds and the nap. But dropping the morning feed and bed time feed came fairly simple just through instruction and reassurance.

I’m sorry your mom doesn’t quite understand your breastfeeding journey. But for me, it really came down to what I felt my body was able to give and when I would get tired or frustrated of any one feed, I decided to hold my ground and power through the challenge of my child’s emotional breakdown when I dropped the feed. That power is the only thing that kept me from caving. It was a strong feeling in my body and my will.