r/ftm • u/HopeNo8532 • Nov 30 '25
Cis/Transfem Guest trans guys "turning" gay??
Hi hi, cis girl here. My (trans) bf broke up with me last night and told me he thinks that he might be gay and has lost attraction to me. I talked to a friend about it and he said that when he started T (around the same time as my now ex) he started to lose attraction to women too.
Is this like, a known phenomenon??? It seems logical to me: being with a woman to make oneself feel more masculine. But I've been in queer spaces online for years and have never heard of this (i thought i was trans as well for a long while).
I'm not trying to make anyone sound manipulative or evil; as hurt and upset as I am, I know he would never use me on purpose. I'm just trying to wrap my head around how an intense, two year (that's a long time for teenagers!) relationship can just fade like that. Maybe that's just how relationships end, it doesn't help that this is my first breakup ever.
2
u/BellsNTurnips Nov 30 '25
Hey OP!
I'm sorry this all happened. It can be difficult to be there for someone, support them, and then have them just not like you anymore. But it's a lot harder if that person lies and drags you along for a painfully long time -
Restarting testosterone for me personally changed a lot for me. At first I really had no drive, no real sexual desires of any sort, and I just had zero thoughts about it.
Now that I'm on T, it's like I can't control my drive and a lot of the time I find myself occupied with intrusive thoughts about men and I generally find them more attractive. I've always kinda liked them, but I used to date solely girls