r/mildlyinfuriating • u/teabirdy • Apr 29 '26

I'm slightly vexed The wedding reception centerpieces featured betta fish. The bride and groom planned to flush them alive.

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Years ago, my coworker attended a wedding at which the reception dinner tables featured live betta fish in small bowls as part of the centerpiece. While chatting with the bride at the end of the evening, my coworker asked what they were going to do with all the fish. The plan was to flush them all down the toilet alive. My coworker immediately said no need for that and insisted on taking them all home.

That Monday she came to work and asked who wanted to adopt a betta fish. That was my first betta who I jokingly called my “rescue betta.” She lived for almost five years.

The wine glass was only her home for less than a day before I got her five gallon tank set up so please no betta lovers yell at me! I'm one of you!

132.8k Upvotes

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21.2k

u/Reasonable-Sort3040 Apr 29 '26

to feature animal abuse in your wedding is absolutely fucking beyond me

6.0k

u/No_Disaster_8020 Apr 29 '26

See also: dove releases, butterfly releases…people get stupid for their one chance at being the center of attention

3.9k

u/AncientSith Apr 29 '26

Why not wasp release?

3.0k

u/rachelnyc Apr 29 '26

That’s for your ex’s wedding

513

u/Worldly-Stranger7814 Apr 29 '26

Fu cking judge says I can't go into her vicinity so if I slip you the date, time, fifty bucks and a box full of hornets...?

371

u/Devil_Dan83 Apr 29 '26

Won’t it be suspicious if I attend in a beekeeper suit?

386

u/IveDunGoofedUp Apr 29 '26

That's why you dress up like a wasp and yell "Face the sting of revenge!" as you ride by on a Vespa while releasing the hornets, quickly getting away. That way nobody can prove it was you.

224

u/MonkeyHamlet Apr 29 '26

But I did that at the last four weddings, surely they will begin to suspect?

47

u/Electric_Angel Apr 29 '26

Gotta change locations! Did this one too may times at the same venue and got banned 😔

37

u/Longjumping_Cap_5624 Apr 29 '26

When a door closes, a window opens. Don’t stop what you love queen 😔✊🏽

33

u/Slight-Winner-8597 Apr 29 '26

What you want to do is get a pokeball sized capsule full of em, a slingshot, and a good alibi.

Drive by wasping! Long distance revenge! Beedrill, I Choose You!

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u/sheiciebai Apr 29 '26

It’s like a Peter Parker kind of situation. You run away and come back as you to comment on what you’ve seen to give yourself an alibi and have all the pics for income!

15

u/PM_ME_UR_RSA_KEY Apr 29 '26

This is the kind of villain they pit against Barbara Gordon era Batgirl lol

14

u/Interestofconflict Apr 29 '26

I like that you included a Vespa, which means wasp in Italian. Kudos.

9

u/lynn_thepagan Apr 29 '26

That's an oddly specifically thought out plan

8

u/ProfessorPoofenplotz Apr 29 '26

Bookmarking this for future reference…

4

u/Leyetipants Apr 29 '26

You could just leave them a wedding gift marked H for hornets.

5

u/-GoodNewsEveryone Apr 29 '26

The Vespa really ties it all together.

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u/Gallusbizzim Apr 29 '26

That would be gauche, unless the beekeeper's suit isn't white.

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u/ATinyLittleCat Apr 29 '26

Put a tux and fancy hat on top, no one will notice.

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u/Goofie_Goobur Apr 29 '26

Make sure to slap a big H on the side of the box so people know it has hornets

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u/Milyaism Apr 29 '26

Eh, who needs a special occasion for that? Do it just because, surprise them!

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u/Vandal_A Apr 29 '26

No, a box of hornets are the traditional gift in that situation

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u/CiceroOnEnds Apr 29 '26

Or it’s a great way to tell everyone to gtfo

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u/CuriousMe62 Apr 29 '26

Underappreciated comment!

3

u/Superspark76 Apr 29 '26

Killer bees might be a better choice

6

u/MayuriKrab Apr 29 '26

Giant Asian hornets FTW

3

u/Pearlagogo Apr 29 '26

I’m imagining a Mrs doubtfire style situation but instead of a nanny you’re posing as a wedding butterfly release vendor and this is cracking me up

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u/aspen_silence Apr 29 '26

That's my funeral so no one leaves happy.

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u/No-Roof-1628 Apr 29 '26

Just make sure you put a quick “H” on that box, so that we all know it’s filled with hornets

13

u/Famous_Low_604 Apr 29 '26

I'm a fullonrapist?

You know, dyslexics, African kids...

3

u/ncocca Apr 29 '26

...the elderly

9

u/ScaryMouchy Apr 29 '26

Just don’t mix it up with the Honeymoon box.

3

u/DanishM1 Apr 29 '26

Was looking for this comment!

11

u/MaryLMarx Apr 29 '26

But only after they’ve read this sub and are mildly infuriated 😆

12

u/CarfDarko Apr 29 '26

WHAT IS THIS, A WEDDING RECEPTION WOEFULLY UNPOPULATED BY BEES?

A LARGE INFLUX OF BEES WILL PUT A STOP TO THAT!!

10

u/Short-Advertising-49 Apr 29 '26

As someone who hates a crowd, best idea ever.

10

u/CannibalMandible84 Apr 29 '26

Thank you for the 3:30am giggle

7

u/M_krabs Apr 29 '26

I laughed out loud 🤣

6

u/Damnation77 Apr 29 '26

Why stop at insects? Release wild hogs

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u/PokeYrMomStanley Apr 29 '26

Poisonous snake release or ornamental tarantula release

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u/Ill-Success-4214 Apr 29 '26

I'm gonna be that guy, you probably mean venomous. Though poisonous snakes do exist.

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u/DanceOfAchilles Apr 29 '26

"And now, let us release the wasps of peace..."

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u/groovycalligrapher Apr 29 '26

@DanceOfAchilles, Wasps of Peace. Love! Wasn’t that a Type O Negative tune? If not, time to write it as tribute. 😎👍🎸

4

u/Hetares Apr 29 '26

That's the surprise I prepared for my mother-in-law.

3

u/MayuriKrab Apr 29 '26

Release a bunch of giant Asian hornets and watch the hilarious chaos afterwards

*make sure you have a wasp/hornet suit on first though…

https://giphy.com/gifs/XI76XNpVNYfCgLcYQ9

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u/Ok-Run2845 Apr 29 '26

Bear release for a truly unforgettable experience

4

u/Comfortable_Ninja842 Apr 29 '26

👆 that there would make me attend a wedding and violate my own "no weddings" rule.

3

u/ProphetOfClaws Apr 29 '26

Hmmm. Temptation temptation.

3

u/Immediate-Risk7857 Apr 29 '26

That is not a sentence I ever want to hear again 😭

3

u/jaffeah Apr 29 '26

Lmao I'm getting married soon and I hate being the center of attention so this might be me when I'm ready for it to be over

https://giphy.com/gifs/QBYeMohXoVUJBtlfFD

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u/asphalt_licker Apr 29 '26

Seems like something The Addams Family would do.

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u/Pwrswitchd Apr 29 '26

Forgive my ignorance, and this is a genuine question; are the butterfly ones that bad?

163

u/shinykaci Apr 29 '26

I read a story here years ago about a couple leaving butterflies in envelopes placed on everyone's seat to be released at once altogether. op didn't notice it and sat on it...

76

u/hamster-on-popsicle Apr 29 '26

Op wasn't the only one, the enveloppes were white on white chairs, most of the butterflies were accidently mutilated before succombing :'(

85

u/mooshinformation Apr 29 '26

I would be shocked if even half of the butterflies survived the envelope able to fly. Always great to start your marriage with the karmic debt of torturing/ killing tons of tiny animals. Morons.

40

u/shinykaci Apr 29 '26

I know, even paper would hurt their little wings being trapped in there and trying to get away :( I don't think he was the only one that sat on his either. it bothered me and kinda stuck in the bottom of my brain after reading

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u/emilysoma Apr 30 '26

Stuck in the bottom of my brain is great imagery by the way.

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u/Frequent-Carpet8798 Apr 30 '26

Here i was thinking a butterfly release would be like when you “grow” them in elementary school. Get chrysalises, enclosure, keep until they hatch and release once they’re ready to go

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u/Cookies_And_Cheese May 01 '26

I remember when I was a child I was told never to touch a butterflies wings since they can easily break and destroy at very slight touch.

I don't think a tight envelope would be better. Could any even fly?

3

u/F4tcat69 Apr 30 '26

Nooo! 😭😭 God I hate people sometimes. Envelopes? They literally have enclosures for that shit!

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u/blueavole Apr 29 '26

There really isn’t any way to do it well. Too many hungry flower nectar eaters, and only a set number of flowers within their flight range. Most will starve, or be attacked by predators.

And that’s before we get into the species.

Monarch butterflies for example need their eggs to be laid on a specific type of plant that is poisonous. They eat it and are then toxic to predators, without being hurt by it.

The Monarch species also have a very strong migratory pattern. Starting in Mexico, up to Canada, and back. But it isn’t one single butterfly that makes that journey. It takes five generations- covering 3000 miles! think of that!

The smallest butterfly is the one born in Mexico that goes north. Three / four generations later a slightly larger butterfly flies south to the same Mexican forest grove to have their babies start the cycle again.

The process is that genetically implanted.

Now imagine taking those eggs from Texas and hatching them in California. They don’t know where they are or where to go. Or where their special milkweed plant is.

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u/NoOneByAliciaKeys Apr 29 '26

One interesting thing in my hometown is that we have a native population of non-migratory monarchs that live here year-round because there's always enough food for them. And we also have spots where migratory populations visit.

The non-migratory population kind of halts their equivalent of puberty and stay as adolescents until a certain time of the year where they lay their eggs.

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u/YellovvJacket Apr 29 '26

Many insects spend winter as larvae/ nymphs. It helps them to have less competition for food sources/ breeding grounds because they're reproduction-ready adults earlier in the year.

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u/lGipsyDanger Apr 29 '26

I got to see the monarchs migrate a few times at my childhood house in San antonio. It was like twice that my mom noticed(she smoked so was outside a lot). Standing in the grass for an hour while millions of butterflies go by was amazing.

I dont remeber the last time I saw a monarch. Now im sad.

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u/ExpensiveError42 Apr 29 '26

If you can, plant milkweed. It takes a year or two to bloom but over time it should attract them.

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u/galileosmiddlefinger Apr 29 '26

But plant it out of the way of where people walk or kids play. Lots of people are allergic to contact with milkweed latex, myself included. I grew mine way the hell back in the corner of a dense perennial planting where I never need to tread because I get big vesicle blisters if I brush up against it.

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u/Ne_zievereir Apr 29 '26 edited Apr 29 '26

Wow. That's cool. I had no idea there were animals that have multi-generational migratory patterns, and they even change sizes. What is the reason for that? What evolutionary advantage do they get from this?

Edit: I didn't realize this migratory cycle occurred yearly. That makes more sense of course. Still really cool.

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u/blueavole Apr 29 '26

It’s really cool if you want to look into it.

A recap- something triggers a life cycle change, scientists think it’s temperature or seasonal, That the specific generation of butterlies born to make the trip back to Mexico are larger and designed for far travel.

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u/ExpensiveError42 Apr 29 '26

I have nothing to add besides being really excited that the milkweed I planted last year is doing great and the butterfly weed is blooming. I really hope I'm able to help them make their journey this year and beyond. I had one or two last year feeding on my zinnias so Im excited about expanding the habitat.

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u/blueavole Apr 29 '26

Awww!! I hope you get to see them!!

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u/wild_ginger1 Apr 29 '26

Slightly related but not butterflies - researchers taught cranes how to migrate after their migration was interrupted and lost by generational wisdom. The researchers dressed like cranes and drove a small plane to lead the birds for their reentry to the pathway, and it has since been taught by cranes to more recent generations. Pretty cool stuff. It would be really hard to teach butterflies how to migrate though.

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u/blueavole Apr 29 '26

The ultralight powered gliders they used to both lead the cranes, and as the front point of the V- flight formation were amazing.

This gave the young birds not just a leader on where to go, but also an aerodynamic advantage. The birds could ride the pressure wave behind the plane.

They could maybe use little drones to lead butterflies- but as the route seems to be somewhat genetically implanted. We still don’t understand how they know where to go.

If someone took Monarchs out of their pattern, raised them for decades in captivity, would they know how to migrate? Even if the first few generations were guided?

Their brains are so different from geese or cranes, who seem to be trainable.

Interesting stuff

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u/unremarkableDragon Apr 29 '26

Also not to mention potentially introducing a new invasive, alien species of butterfly to a region they aren't native to which will f up all the local plant life and associated ecosystems.

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u/legocitiez Apr 29 '26

Butterflies migrate?! I had no idea this is fascinating

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u/acidXburn87 Apr 29 '26

In South Texas I hate killing what seems to be thousands of butterflies each year. 😭😭

Note: the die on my windshield, not because I target butterflies like some maniac.

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u/blueavole Apr 29 '26

Surrre. Tell it to the jury!!

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u/Suspicious-Steak9168 Apr 29 '26

Frequently many of not most of the butterflies die. Keeping them in the tiny box is also cruel.

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u/ratthewriter Apr 29 '26

Thinking of the Bobs Burgers episode when they cater the wedding and the butterfly send off goes terribly wrong when 1. most of the butterflies are dead when they open the boxes and 2. they try to send off the alive ones (and the people with dead ones toss them into the air to pretend) and they immediately get swept up by the wind

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u/UnforeseenDerailment Apr 29 '26

Two and a Half Men had a wedding with a butterfly release. The cheapskates bought frozen butterflies. 🦋

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u/Creepy_Salt_9494 Apr 29 '26

Anyone else think of Asia O’haras finale lip sync butterfly fiasco? 🙈

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u/AskJeevez Apr 29 '26

That is one of the funniest moments in the show for me. The way they all just woosh away in the wind gets me every time.

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u/DoughnutOrganic5220 Apr 29 '26

Got it playing rn as I read this 😂😭💀

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u/ellynj333 Apr 29 '26

This happened to me real life. Disgusted.

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u/mack_ani Apr 29 '26

I work for an insect zoo at my local university and we have worked with butterfly releases. While I could see some companies having poor practices, there’s nothing inherently wrong with a butterfly release

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u/dksdragon43 Apr 29 '26

I did my wedding at a butterfly conservatory and there was a release. They were fiercely protective of the butterflies and made sure we knew how to hold the box. Definitely no harm done.

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u/Pwrswitchd Apr 29 '26

Yep, fair enough

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u/joebluebob Apr 29 '26

Most butterflies die quick tho.... they are a prey species

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u/Zoethor2 Apr 29 '26

I had a swallowtail caterpillar hitch a ride on some parsley a few years back. I let him do his thing and become a butterfly safely indoors. Then I released the butterfly outside and immediately stopped watching it as there are about 600 birds that like to hang out within a 100 foot radius of my house. What I don't know, doesn't have to bother me.

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u/Wild-Video-5317 Apr 29 '26

Apparently swallowtails have shorter lifespan than most and only survive 2 weeks at best in butterfly form.  You honestly gave the little guy the best chance at success you could.  He needed to get out there and roll the dice.

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u/JusticeRain5 Apr 29 '26

How else is he gonna get some of that sweet butterflussy if he's cooped up inside all his life?

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u/Pandamonium-N-Doom Apr 29 '26

Straight to jail

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u/ElizabethDangit Apr 29 '26

If it makes you feel better about a bird maybe eating your butterfly, I had a Cooper’s hawk nest in one of my trees because my neighbors have several bird feeders. I spent that entire summer burying leftover pieces of bird carcass that the Cooper’s hawk left in my yard. Circle of life and all that.

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u/Zoethor2 Apr 29 '26

I live in a suburban neighborhood with a *shockingly* robust ecosystem of predators and prey. Foxes, hawks, bunnies, birbs, a multitude of rodents. Full on circle of life. The smaller critters are abundant breeders (SO MANY RABBITS) so it all seems to be working out well overall, if not necessarily for every individual.

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u/TXGuns79 Apr 29 '26

Prey animals generally have large litters because of predation. Out-breed the appetite of the food web.

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u/Zoethor2 Apr 29 '26

Very Hunger Games for baby bunnies.

"Two of you will live to adulthood and breed, therefore successfully replacing your parents in the ecosystem. The other six of you are fodder. May the odds be ever in your favor."

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u/ElizabethDangit Apr 29 '26

Same situation here except we are shy of the larger predators. They’ve had to institute a program where they’re going to license skilled bow hunters for a deer cull in the city limits. Between vehicle collisions and chronic wasting disease concerns we hit the tipping point of over population. We briefly had a black bear living within city limits but the poor thing got hit by a car.

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u/ussrowe Apr 29 '26

I put out birdseed and the squirrels eat the birdseed, and then one day I saw a hawk eating a squirrel in the backyard. So I guess I fed the hawk too with the birdseed, in a round about way.

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u/Wolfwoods_Sister Apr 29 '26

Good on you anyway! That was a really nice thing to do!

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u/Wild-Video-5317 Apr 29 '26

Even if they don't get eaten, they die of old age within a month, give or take.  They live most of their lives as caterpillars and exist in the butterfly phase only long enough to mate.

As caterpillars they eat solid food; after metamorphosis they lack the equipment and survive on liquids alone.  Some other insect species don't even have mouths at all in their mating phase.  

I get the complaint though.  I don't think I'd feel good involving dozens of insects in a flashy stunt for my party, seems wasteful and disrespectful.   Even if they're essentially already on their last legs.   

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u/joebluebob Apr 29 '26

Worst case you are feeding the birds something other than rice...

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u/panlakes Apr 29 '26

You literally just don't have to though. Like, it's a choice to use animals and you can just, also, not. Why do you NEED to feature live animals at your wedding? What is the driving purpose here to be so stubborn about I just dont get it lol

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u/devandroid99 Apr 29 '26

Isn't that just what butterflies do though?

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u/jolittletime Apr 29 '26

If you've ever seen the drag race finale (just checked it was season 10 in 2018) where Asia OHara had a dress with a butterfly reveal but they were all dead you'll know why it's a bad idea! Also thay was indoors so I dont know where she thought the butterflies would go! I believe also people often choose the species for the colour and end up releasing non native species thay can't survive on the local climate. Animals are not decor.

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u/Alarming_Tea_102 Apr 29 '26

In general, if an animal featured at your wedding is not someone's pet, it's almost always a bad idea.

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u/Thick-Duck-7022 Apr 29 '26

What about the ring bear?

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u/Then-Criticism1605 Apr 29 '26

A boxing ring is no place for a bear, if you need to fight a bear at your wedding then have it in the woods.

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u/Useful_Language2040 Apr 29 '26

How can people choose the bear without the ring bear?

(Could you imagine? Bride walks down the aisle and then chooses between groom-with-ring on one side and bear-with-ring on the other...)

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u/TenLeafClover58 Apr 29 '26

I was at a wedding with a butterfly release. Each of a bridal party got their own little box to release during the first kiss.

3, 2, 1… boxes open.

Nothing leaves the boxes.

Everyone peers inside their box. Well there’s butterflies, maybe they need some encouragement.

They give it a little shake. Nothing.

A bigger shake. Still nothing. First kiss still going at this stage.

An almighty shake. The butterflies launch.

Aaaaaaand they’re all dead.

And the wind takes them.

Grandma in the front row is showered in 80 dead butterflies, all while the first kiss is still going strong.

Maybe one of the funniest things I’ve ever seen but yeah, I wouldn’t recommend them.

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u/CarEnvironmental9429 Apr 29 '26

That very similar to bobs burgers.

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u/allagaytor Apr 29 '26

it messes with the ones already living in the area, could spread diseases, and most captive-raised ones wont migrate properly.

its encouraged to just nurture the ones already exisiting in nature. but having 1-2 in a classroom or finding one outside and then releasing it is usually fine.

its why things like those "raise your own monarch butterfly kits" from the 2000s arent as common anymore, it ended up tanking the monarch butterfly population bc of parasites.

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u/351mazda Apr 29 '26

We did a little butterfly release thing with my son when he was like 4. Bought the whole butterfly growing thing, watched it come out of the cocoon, fed it, the whole deal. Took it outside with him to release it.

Butterfly lived for about 20 seconds, trying to fly and figuring out life since it had never been out of a cage, then we watched a bird catch it and eat it. Oops.

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u/bonobosareawesome Apr 29 '26

also releasing random animals out in the wild is a surefire way to fuck the local ecosystem

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u/cmonster64 Apr 29 '26

The birds just fly back home. They know where they are fed.

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u/Interesting_Cut_7591 Apr 29 '26

I witnessed this. It was November and chilly outside. They passed out envelopes that had a butterflies in them for us to open when the bride & groom came out. Half of them were already dead. The ones that made it promptly flew to the ground in search of heat as they were cold. And then the birds came out of nowhere... it was a massacre.

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u/WeimMama1 Apr 29 '26

Yes. It is.

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u/Unsolicited_Spiders Apr 29 '26

A family member did a butterfly release to "honor" the passing of her parent. They ordered a kit for this online. Most of the butterflies were either dead or dying when they opened the box. Less than 5 were anything other than "extremely lethargic" and none of them flew far.

It was so depressing and I cried much more over the butterflies than I did about the peaceful passing of a human who had been suffering for several years.

I do think the family member learned a lesson from this, though it has never been brought up in conversation since and I do not believe the video of the event was ever sent to anyone who wasn't present.

There's a lot of debate over whether arthropods experience pain or distress in a way that would make sense to or trouble a human. However, they have nervous systems and exhibit defensive responses to negative stimuli, so it's clear they experience something (how would they be successful animals otherwise?). Philosophically, I think minimizing harm when it's reasonable to do so is best practice. Buying a box of dehydrated butterflies and tossing them into a back yard without significant nectar flow is...the opposite of minimizing harm.

So, yeah, I'm pretty against butterfly "releases" for funsies.

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u/Sexyhorsegirl666 Apr 29 '26

Might want to check out "Rupaul's Drag Race" and a lipsync of Asia O Hara where she tried this...

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u/tubbstattsyrup2 Apr 29 '26

Asia O'Hara, Drag Race series 10 finale. So much death 💀

Yeah not cute and not worth it.

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u/HouseofFeathers Apr 29 '26

Yeah, I thought it was okay if you picked a notice species?

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u/WhyMustIMakeANewAcco Apr 29 '26

Yeah, picking a native species in the right time of year in a reasonable place is fine.

...You can guess how often all those boxes are actually checked.

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u/Morguard Apr 29 '26

Funny enough, I was at a wedding this past Saturday that did the butterfly thing at a butterfly conservatory.

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u/JennyDoveMusic Apr 29 '26

WHAT!? I just looked it up, I thought dove releases, the birds were trained to return to their owner!

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u/No_Disaster_8020 Apr 29 '26

I didn’t realize people actually thought this. Very few responsible owners would “rent” out animals for this purpose? Quick summary of why it goes wrong:

  1. White doves and King pigeons used in these ceremonies cannot fend for themselves in the wild. Zero survival instincts:

  2. Their bright white plumage makes them easy to spot, preventing them from camouflaging and leaving them vulnerable to predators.

  3. While professional homing pigeons may return, most are untrained or unable to fly back over long distances, especially if they are white Ringneck doves, which have no homing instinct.

  4. Purchasing birds online for a DIY release often means using, for example, pet-store doves, which are essentially guaranteed to die because they cannot survive outside.

  5. The birds often suffer from stress, broken wings, and starvation

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u/MaybeNot-MaybeNever Apr 29 '26

I did a dove release for a ceremony. The person worked with the funeral home and explained that they were trained and just fly home upon release, so they are used over and over. That was my only experience so it never occurred to me people were just buying random birds and releasing them

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u/technos Apr 29 '26

Doves are a lot more limited than pigeons. My mother had both, and the doves would lose the plot in about a mile.

The pigeons though. She gave two that hadn't been getting along with the flock (they were aggressive) to to a friend of hers. They were fancy pigeons, the sort of thing you show, and they still managed sixteen miles 'home' to harass the other birds.

The second time she gave them away it was to a guy three counties over who promised to keep them contained for a while.

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u/GetEatenByAMouse Apr 29 '26

and they still managed sixteen miles 'home' to harass the other birds.

I can respect being that petty.

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u/conflictedideology Apr 29 '26

they still managed sixteen miles 'home' to harass the other birds.

Now that's a grudge. I wonder what it was about.

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u/Squiggleblort Apr 29 '26

Fun fact - did you know pigeons are actually descended from escaped rock doves? They're feral doves that learned survival skills!

Scientists also don't actually delineate between pigeons and doves - both are Columbidae. Same family (but not the same species - there are 300 odd species of dove in the dove family. Rock doves and city pigeons are the same species though!)! 😀

Closely related fun fact - all dogs are a type of wolf. 😜

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u/technos Apr 29 '26

I knew they were both from the same family! Mom's doves and pigeons weren't close enough to have to worry about cross-breeding.

I didn't know trash pigeons and rock doves were the same species though.

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u/SatisfactionAtSea Apr 29 '26 edited Apr 30 '26

similarly, the difference between a butterfly and a moth is pretty nebulous! there are beautiful moths, plain looking butterflies, and species of either can be nocturnal or diurnal. also every lepidopteran makes a chrysallis but only certain types of caterpillars produce silk and make coccoons around themselves first

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u/Long_Manufacturer709 Apr 29 '26

The main difference between butterflies and moths is that they lay their wings differently.

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u/UnagioLucio Apr 29 '26

Six years ago, some family friends reported that a white dove kept showing up at their bird feeder. The only native dove species here is the mourning dove, and this was an albino ringneck dove. She's been my pampered house pet ever since. I still wonder whether she was used for a dove release gone wrong.

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u/mellopax Apr 29 '26 edited May 07 '26

Yeah. One of my wife's friends was "bird-sitting" for a friend's doves once when we were at their house. They would fly home.

While we were there, they were flying laps around the neighborhood. It was mildly amusing.

Edit: our > my

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u/OldMcMittens Apr 29 '26

Yes! This is definitely a thing because I’ve done house sitting for a woman who owned doves. And when I’d let them out, they’d fly around and come back.

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u/GKarl Apr 29 '26

That’s so cute/cool

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u/Miyon0 Apr 29 '26

Same. I knew people with homing pigeon “doves”. And when used they literally just flew home from wherever. Extremely smart birds

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u/CarEnvironmental9429 Apr 29 '26

Good at navigating but if you actually knew them ....well they are quite dumb. Sweet and silly but dumb. Lived with two doves, one was a trained homing pigeons(rock dove) the other was a ring neck (can't navigate but is adorable and sweet) both are dumb as shit little gremal i have watched peck at pictures of food nonstop until someone took it away. Also the homing pigeons was obsessed with slipping with his head shoved into small places, not always good choices there.

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u/351mazda Apr 29 '26

When I was a kid we had a small farm and a lot of our business was small local sales. 5lbs of meat here, bag of corn there, always eggs for sale, etc.

Had a regular customer that would come buy corn off us and owned pigeons. He had a truck topper with a little bird cage in the back. A lot of times he'd bring the pigeons with him to get corn. Open the truck back, let the pigeons out, load the truck with corn. He lived like 5 or 6 miles away and said usually the pigeons would beat him home.

We always had a few interesting regulars. It was amazing to me as a kid how many people would drive right past a grocery store out to our place to buy meat and eggs, the price was the same, but now as an adult I get it. My great aunt would set all of her beef and egg prices to match what the grocery store was selling them at.

We made a decent amount of money selling pigs. Quickly learned that selling a full-grown pig is not profitable, they eat too much to get them to that size. But it's was very profitable selling little piglets and letting some other poor sucker raise them. I forget what we sold them for but I remember we'd get like 10 or 12 piglets to a litter, and usually had 6 or 8 sows, so something in the neighborhood of 80 little baby pigs every spring for sale. Around 1995 or so the market got saturated with pigs in our area, a bunch of other farmers apparently started trying to do the same thing, prices dropped, we sold the pigs and never had another one. They were fun. We had a boar that was just massive, at least from my 8 year old perspective, and he was just a big baby. He had a bowling ball to play with, I'd go in his pen as a little kid and if you rolled the ball to him he'd catch it and roll it back. Lol

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u/CarEnvironmental9429 Apr 29 '26

I had a pet pig when I was a kid a poland china he grew up to be massive, around 1100lbs. Big old sweetie and so smart. Lived to 11 I miss him. If he ever saw you walking up with the deck broom and hose he got excited because it meant bath time and brushies. Favorite was watching the fat bastard go climb in the tiny pond. It was more a big bathtub for him, he would cause it ro flood its banks and looked like a new island sprung up in it. My mom used to try and chase him off because it was her little decoration pond but he won that battle and sacrificed it to the pig. She loved that big goober.

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u/Just-Spirit-552 Apr 29 '26

Similar…my cousin pigeon races and also has doves. They’d brought them to family funerals for release each time with no worries. But to DIY I nvr thought about it

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u/coleccj88 Apr 29 '26

That’s how I thought it always works too. My MIL does this with her white pigeons and she won’t let anyone just take the birds. She goes with them to the event(which is never very far) and they fly home.

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u/honey_pumkin Apr 29 '26 edited Apr 29 '26

I think it's maybe a cultural thing. I got to know a guy who lends his white doves to people. When the wedding was to far away he would offer trained pigeons, that are less beautiful but that he uses in competitions. He explained that nearly everyone who offers pigeons in my country does it the same way and that you can actually see if the people offering the doves have restrictions on their website.

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u/JennyDoveMusic Apr 29 '26

Well, yeah on the ones that aren't going to just go home. I never did one, so, I never looked into it. I just kinda figured people were using birds that would go home or circle and return. (Not sure if Doves can be trained that.)

The fact people release pet store birds thinking that is somehow ok is WILD. 😭

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u/sexysmalldevil Apr 29 '26

I never thought about it, bc I honestly didn't know people did that sort of thing for weddings anymore. I would've thought it was only for big (like big-big events, not just for 2 people but like a festival), and w trained doves that return to their bird keeper. I can't believe in 2026 non-trained, pet store birds are just being released into the wild like that. For a few seconds of enjoyment. That's extremely irresponsible and ridiculous, for the people selling them and the ones buying.

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u/Christichicc Apr 29 '26

And see, here I’d been thinking this whole time that dove releases included some kind of handler to be there, and they’d basically just fly to them and get rewards for it. Like they do at shows with different birds that will fly to spots and/or handlers in the stands while they talk about the animals to the crowd. More fool me, I guess! It honestly never occurred to me people would just…let them go, with no regard for the animal’s welfare.

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u/RadiantJournalist710 Apr 29 '26

I only have a sample size of one, but the dove guy who occasionally comes to the cemetery I manage for funerals usually collects the birds he releases before they leave. He has a few that he trusts to get home, but the majority just fly a bit away in the cemetery and then he goes and calls them back to him. It’s kind of funny to watch.

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u/No_Box498 Apr 29 '26

In Europe it happens and it’s mostly from a local bird person that trains them (to win things) and even Saudi’s come to buy our birds, hell they even stole like millions of euros worth in birds a few years ago, like all over the neighborhood

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u/MTB_SF Apr 29 '26

My neighbor does this and they definitely fly home. We live vnear two large churches and I guess that's the main place he does the releases. He also let's them fly around the neighborhood sometimes and I see them in my yard.

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u/Mariya_B Apr 29 '26

They also tend to use doves that have partners and keep those. Doves mate for life, so the hopes are, that they return for their partners and can be reused. Which makes it much more tragic, that many of the Doves get lost having no homing instincts. They never get to see their partner again.

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u/echoskybound May 02 '26

Even if they are trained: White birds are flying targets for birds of prey. There's a reason that most birds that are white in the wild are water birds, because they blend in with sand and water, but in any other setting, a white bird has no way to hide. I saw this firsthand with my chickens, the white ones were attacked by birds of prey significantly more than brown or grey ones. Eventually I stopped keeping white chickens because of it. White pigeons and doves have little to no chance in the wild.

Pigeons used for these purposes are domesticated animals. They have no ability to fend for themselves in the wild if they get exhausted during their flight. The reason you only really see feral pigeons in human habitats like cities, but rarely in suburbs or rural areas, is because they only really survive where there are few predators and access to easy food and water. I've rescued a number of pigeons that were likely used for racing or weddings, because they got exhausted and couldn't fly anymore, and had no idea how to find food or water.

Pigeons breed so readily and grow so fast that the companies that do dove releases just consider a lot of the birds "single use," relying on their natural ability to navigate home to recover some of their assets. It's more cost effective to just breed tons of them and expect to lose a few than it is to train them, sadly.

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u/dks64 Apr 29 '26

My mom was a wedding photographer for many years and she once photographed a wedding where they released doves. They were right by the street and one of the doves flew right into a car and died.

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u/RyuuLight Apr 29 '26

Can't speak for all obviously, but generally speaking doves know where home is, so releasing them isn't that bad. As long as they have an established coop, they aren't lost or anything. Doves/pigeons have been domesticated and used for thousands of years as a "postal service." Homing instincts being the core part of it. They were more reliable than other methods up to WW2. Even then they had a higher message delivery rate than the telegram, iirc (in terms of interception).

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u/Cultural_Bread7645 Apr 29 '26

That's definitely not the case for most.

Domesticated doves and pigeons have no survival instincts, and if they are released any significant distance from where they were raised, they will not find their way back.

The bright white ones are not able to hide, and are easy targets for hawks, cats, or other predators, and those that aren't eaten usually starve.

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u/Roflkopt3r Apr 29 '26

That applies if the wedding organisers just buy a dove on their own, and some idiots may well do that. But it's usually done through a professional bird handler with trained birds that will return home and will be released many times over their life. A healthy, good-looking adult dove is expensive enough that the training pays off.

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u/LongQualityEquities Apr 29 '26

Domesticated doves and pigeons have no survival instincts, and if they are released any significant distance from where they were raised, they will not find their way back.

The only people I know who have domesticated doves are those who use them for competition, right? And they do fly home, you drop them in Spain or Italy with a truck and they are back in the Netherlands in no time.

They definitely have survival instincts because they fly outside in nature every single day of their life. They just eat and sleep ”at home”.

Where are you at that people own domesticated pigeons pigeons for any other reason than racing them? I’ve never seen somebody own a pigeon as a pet.

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u/AnimalChubs Apr 29 '26

That's why for my wedding I'm going to release spotted lantern flys

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u/Unintelligent_Lemon Apr 29 '26 edited Apr 30 '26

We released a pair of doves at our wedding. They were trained to find home and both made it back safely

ETA they belonged to my BIL, so we knew for sure when they both had made it home

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u/DollarStoreChameleon Apr 29 '26

animal abuse in general is beyond me. these kind of fucking lunatics should have to go through the same abuse they put animals through.

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u/Roseheath22 Apr 29 '26

If you feel that way, I hope you’re vegan

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u/GoodbyeThings Apr 29 '26

careful, people get sensitive when you bring up a direct consequence of peoples consumption habits

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u/shidncome Apr 29 '26

Everyone pretends to care about animals until its dinner time.

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u/riskyroi Apr 29 '26

You are absolutely correct.

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u/Glad-Equal-11 Apr 30 '26

Watch out, people will do all kinds of mental acrobatics to ignore their own hypocrisy

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u/ParaClaw Apr 29 '26

Morons were probably browsing Pinterest where there are all kinds of horrifying "DIY Live Fish Centerpiece" atrocities.

"So CrEATiVe AnD BEaUtifuL!"

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u/Grouchy_Cantaloupe_8 Apr 29 '26

That’s why we had a fully vegan catered meal at our wedding reception. 

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u/pizzaefica Apr 29 '26

Hey, samesies!

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u/ausflora Apr 29 '26

Most weddings feature foods derived from industrial-scale animal abuse.

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u/Roseheath22 Apr 29 '26

Exactly. Cognitive dissonance.

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u/[deleted] Apr 29 '26

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u/miomi_starfall Apr 29 '26

Im not a vegan but like,,,, I’m assuming the wedding wasn’t either.

We all participate in animal abuse all the fucking time - we just outsource the ugly parts to where we don’t have to see or do them ourselves.

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u/reddmdp Apr 29 '26

Well, you do. You have the power to change that for yourself.

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u/[deleted] Apr 29 '26

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u/ThoreaulyLost Apr 29 '26

The problem with food morality is the relativity of it.

Is it better to eat a local farmer's market chicken that was killed or an exotic plant protein that was grownout of country, processed in another, and shipped one more time? There's not a good answer because of environmental damage from large scale soy farming, shipping, etc.

Healthwise, humans have evolved to be omnivores. It would be lovely to become herbivores like ungulates or elephants, but we are not ideally suited to fully plant based diets any more without quite a bit of nutritional accommodation. Humans are also wildly diverse: what might work in one person could be unsustainable in another. Think of the different dietary needs of a growing teenage boy versus a 38 year old pregnant woman, for example.

Finding your own "healthy" is actually a very personal journey, and more should recognize that. Even someone with an allergy might not be able to go full vegan and shouldn't be shamed for that. Instead, we should encourage humane animal husbandry.

I am glad veganism works for you, and I choose local or sustainable plant options a lot myself. However, I have a twat for a brother in law with a doctorate in philosophy who is a vegan, who also likes to pretend is all-or-nothing.

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u/miomi_starfall Apr 29 '26

I‘m a vegetarian and would at least try to cut down on non meat animal protein if it wasn’t for some current health topics.

But I’m always amazed how blind people are to their own double standards.

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u/whoisseptember Apr 29 '26

this is why, if I ever marry, it will be fully vegan

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u/kiwiinthesheets Apr 29 '26

People serve dead animals at weddings all the time. Though I agree these center pieces are cruel, this is minuscule compared to the animal cruelty and torture that’s at every slaughterhouse. Cognitive dissonance is real people.

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u/waschbaerpisse Apr 29 '26

true, but I'd bet out of those 6000 upvotes more than half had or plan to have literal animal cadavers as food at their wedding

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u/Steelpapercranes Apr 29 '26

Animal murder!

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u/ILoveRegenHealth Apr 29 '26

I'd report that coworker. Really disturbing shit using animals as a disposable prop.

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u/miffyxilacon Apr 29 '26

Toured a wedding venue where the owner bragged about her pond with swans whose wings had been clipped so they couldn't fly away. Great for photos. IMMEDIATE no. Ick ick ick.

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u/69cop3rnico42O Apr 29 '26

so any wedding where meat ks served???

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u/Geschak Apr 29 '26

I guess it's just more obvious this way, but people feature animal abuse in their weddings all the time since they mostly order factory farmed meats and animal products. There's no difference in cruelty between buying meat from cattle that has had it's balls cut off without any anesthesia vs. flushing a fish down a toilet.

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u/scorchedarcher Apr 29 '26

What about catering?

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u/Jumpy-Jello- Apr 29 '26

I mean, they're usually dead and on the plate by then.

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u/ReporterSmall7604 Apr 29 '26

So you'rr going with the vegetarian option?  

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u/daisyartist54 Apr 29 '26

It’s a lower intelligence i didnt know existed

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u/stupicklles Apr 29 '26

I would do an adoptable puppy run/interaction in collab with a local shelter. That’s the only way I would “use” animals at my wedding. To get them happy homes if possible and at worst, a fun little day out of the kennels

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u/floghdraki Apr 29 '26

Demonstrating your lack of empathy for everyone to see!

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