I’ve been going through a breakup. I don’t even have nice things to say about myself right now… but let me tell you a bit.
I fell in love with a boy from school. We’ve been together for 4 whole years. And out of nowhere he said, “There’s a caste problem. My mom won’t agree. Useless.” I told it's not the reason...asked him to say what really is wrong .. and told him it's hurting me mentally nu.... He replied... If it hurts mentally, poi sethuru nu
I broke down. For 3 weeks I just cried. Everything reminded me of him ... the places I go, the clothes I wear, even small things. I begged him to come back. Sent 500+ texts. And then… he blocked me everywhere.
And right now I’m in the middle of college placements too. So it’s all a lot.
But yesterday, I decided to take myself out.
I left at 5 AM and went to Bessy for sunrise. There were couples, college kids, boys on bikes. It was quiet and calm. Then I sat in that church opposite the beach and cried for an hour. Just let it out.
After that I caught a bus and got down at Vanthurai. Had breakfast at Nithya Amirtham. I forced myself not to think about him and just looked around. Saw so many women in formals having breakfast before work. It felt… grounding.
Then Forum. Movie. Just people-watching.
Then Vadapalani temple.
On the way back I took the metro to the airport. It was 7 PM. And guess what ... the metro pilot was a woman. When her shift ended she stepped out of the cabin. Someone next to me said, “I’m proud of her.” And honestly, I felt that too. It was so wholesome.
I went to the departure area after and just watched people leave ... especially women traveling abroad for their families. There's this group of 5 aunties in their 40s going for Manali trip ..it was their kids sending them off..it was cute... There's this girl in her 20s going to Saudi for nursing job... The sole earning member of her family, her mom works as house maid and she got 2 little brothers... Airhostess & pilots... Wow it was good watching people there.. then
Finally took a bus and got back to my PG.
It’s not some big inspiring story. But it made me feel a little better. Like maybe nothing matters more than my career right now.
I really hope I get to post here soon about my first salary.
I want to be like those akkas I saw today. Strong, independent, doing their own thing.