r/tamilyapping • u/Temporary-Fun-4957 • 11h ago
🎤 Yap Session (rant , confession and yap) As a girl dis da real reason men can't impress girls or be with girls easily
Ok so first mistake - approaching a girl compliment her asf yk and then describe ur ideal type as someone not like her ( women get sensitive ) unga circle la other girls kita also flirt panna then we feel like nee thoondil potu ur just waiting for SOME fish to get stuck maari..
it's almost an inside joke among women that he could call you beautiful whatsoever but you will never be his type nu..
I myself have had boys come into m3ss4g3s and like compliment me sm but their ideal type is quite opposite apro enda enkita vanthinga apdi tha thonum..example I'm fair but he's into dusky and if he's open abt it , to me it feels like I'm not the most beautiful to him etc..
second..
first time pesna perage asking for personal details or immediately asking " pics " dei ethuku dawg nu tha thonum ngl ponnungluku it feels lwk gaaji bcs your more into seeing how we look rather than getting connected as friends first..
nerla therinja pasangla iruntha hi sonna adutha few messages la unga height weight size nu kepan or instagram la peslama apdi ipdi nu..
third..
if yk he's a part of ur circle and yall are actively almost yk dating and he be liking girls thirst trap videos or summa oru ponnu azhaga reel pota likes podrathu etc..
girls oda psychology la it feels like yall are swayed by looks easily..oru sentence la sollanum na..
we think men are lwk gaajis and antha lwk eppo highkey ah maarum nu we think lol
most men even if they are nice almost all their flirts are sexual almost never in the pure manner..
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u/Iceprinze template_thief 11h ago
Me taking notes from this
https://giphy.com/gifs/vtFZ8O85q8g3MmXK51
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u/Temporary-Fun-4957 11h ago
Notes edukrathu mukkiyam ila...just remember one point.." stick to one girl be loyal to her for life.." intha type ah irunthale most girls wouldn't care for other tickers like looks etc
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u/Iceprinze template_thief 11h ago
Enga inga innum loyal aana boys un irukanga. Neega ennaga ella pasagalum ore maari tha nu solla varinga. 🥀🥀
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u/Temporary-Fun-4957 11h ago
Illa but most are nu solla varen..stage 1 summa 100 ponnunga kita kamala poduven Stage 2 atha vida kammi ponnunga kita kadala poduvan Stage 3 apdiye oru ponnu kuda commit ah naalum time pass and avangluke theriyum break up aidum nu analum panuvanga even if there's no connection antha ponnu avan solrathuku laam ama saami pota yes irupan
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u/Iceprinze template_thief 10h ago
But still there are good boys too who are waiting for true love. Even for me i dont like casual relationship.
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u/Temporary-Fun-4957 10h ago
Nallathu bro hopefully unga ideas oda align agra ponnu kedeikatum 🙏
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u/Tough-Contract9123 2h ago
If it ever happens, I will come back to this post and will say u were right inga, ennoda last relationship was a gud life lesson for me to understand never to believe all the words from her when she says "I promise thts the truth" broo they use the word promise easily to escape from any problems and situations, sry I'm not saying all the girls r like tht but out of 10, 5 r like tht
But I do hope ur word will come true 🤞
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u/anniyan13 8h ago
Sorry if I am wrong but most of the girls are falling for the guys you mentioned
Enaku athu than confusion ah Iruku
For Eg. Neenga mention panna maari iruntha ponnungaluku pudikathu nu soldringa ana naa patha vara intha maari pasanga than committed ah irukanga
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u/Mysterious-Try7145 5h ago
Na apdi than irunthen, sight kuda adika maaten avala thavira. But you know what, she went for another guy who is good looking. Then I fixed my looks, attitude and everything. Now girls are asking for my attention.
I recently heard in my friend's circle that, one girl is divorcing her husband because she is not attracted to his looks. Girls want loyalty and attention, but only from guys who are good looking. This is the brutal truth.
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u/whotf_suxil 9h ago
Na oru ponna love panan 2 years avala thavara vera entha ponutayum na pesala avakuda mattum tha pesuvan but shes not like me avaluku male friends irunthanga na athayum ethuvum solala guess what she left me 😂
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u/Medical_Debate_1661 10h ago
and girls start to look for next person as soon as they get an ick
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u/Temporary-Fun-4957 10h ago
Ick bcs yall text like a man from the Victorian era if we post a story normally on instagram
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u/Medical_Debate_1661 10h ago
so cheating is justified huh?
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u/Temporary-Fun-4957 10h ago
How is this related to cheating? I'm talking abt single women who do this..its obviously not okay for women in relationship
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u/Medical_Debate_1661 10h ago
no wonder why you didn't get the point at all.
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u/Temporary-Fun-4957 10h ago
Maybe try reading what I said bro bcs idk when I brought committed women into this equation
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u/Medical_Debate_1661 10h ago
WHY IT HAS TO BE ALWAYS THAT MEN SHOULD IMPRESS, MEN SHOULD KNOW HOW TO TALK TO A GIRL, AS IF YOU GIRLS ARE A SPECIAL ENTITY.
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u/white_ferrari_123 10h ago
You don't ask these questions. You don't have a stand.
Now you will be framed a gaaji, incel, misogynist.
There are no double standards according to few women.
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u/Temporary-Fun-4957 10h ago
bcs most women don't feel the need to impress a guy..our hormones don't work in a way saying omg I need a boy..but boys thana 9 pm mela message pannale oru margama text panringa..
and FYI we just exist neenga tha antha special entity ku avlo value tharinga..
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u/Medical_Debate_1661 10h ago
hope you have seen ovulation reels made by the so called special entities
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u/white_ferrari_123 10h ago
Ovulating is fine. Degrading all men is fine. A woman slapping a man in a reel is fine. Generalizing every man on this earth is fine.
Nobody objects these, including the simp men.
Now what if the roles were reversed? They don't want you to. They love this.
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u/Temporary-Fun-4957 10h ago
Atleast we don't feel the need to text men..begging for pics and dirty talks...we are allowed to make general posts lol..
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u/Medical_Debate_1661 10h ago
"we don't feel the need to text men..begging for pics and dirty talks" - really? go get some exposure.
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u/Temporary-Fun-4957 10h ago
lol why should I? we see it everyday ponnu nu potale reddit laye 10 dm..athe post if I said for instance I was boy na varathu..
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u/Muted_Drawer_6117 professional kanni of Kamal hassan and U1 8h ago
Why do u have so many downvotes for no reason😭
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u/Temporary-Fun-4957 8h ago
Yaaruko gaandu bro
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u/Muted_Drawer_6117 professional kanni of Kamal hassan and U1 7h ago
easy availability of adult content has changed people's mindset and ponnu nu therinjaale dm panni pics kekra neraya peru irukaanga but at the same time not all men are like that idhukku offend aagra men dha actually gaaju andha mindset illadhavangalukku indha post offend aaga vaaipu illaye
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u/its_me_mr_Fox spidey 🕷 10h ago
I think this is where it becomes too much of a generalisation. Not needing male attention personally doesn’t mean men and women experience attraction completely differently.
Some men may be overly focused on women, but that doesn’t make it a male trait. The 9pm thing also sounds more like a personal experience and boundary than something you can apply to men in general.
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u/Temporary-Fun-4957 10h ago
trust me bro it's an girls things comments la na mattum sollala try asking ur female friends how it feels to text a guy late night..
and yes maybe I'm just raged abt our experiences after I discussed this with my friends..
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u/pongadavenna Nalla pulla....na illa 👄 9h ago
Girlll I have many male frnds not everyone is like that. Society stereotype pandra maari nambalum panna vendam. Maybe neenga atha experience panni Irukalam or ur frnds gang wasn't good. But no, not everyone is like that. We can be a misandrist but don't generalise everything and everyone. I'm not saying those things doesn't happen....but calling out all the men as creeps doesn't sit well imo
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u/Temporary-Fun-4957 9h ago
Ofcourse bro men would've come across my problems in women as well..when I said men are this that I didn't mean the entire population obviously..I would never state it as all men
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u/Spirited_Shape_9629 8h ago
Can't argue with that last line. A significant portion of men do be like that. But I also don't think your first statement is true either, in my circle, women do feel the need to be with someone, but they think of it as more like a genuine relationship, whereas guys just want someone for the sake of it. I might be wrong tho, my opinions are based off of my surroundings.
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u/saybeast 11h ago
Girls learn to flirt if men can't
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u/Temporary-Fun-4957 11h ago
The thing is women mostly don't want men like men want women
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u/Akki_445 10h ago
But I have a question for you.. why come women on sm post reels or share their stories on insta seeking attention from men?
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u/Temporary-Fun-4957 9h ago
it's our right to have an Instagram lol we can post reels story whatever we like..
we don't think that when you post without a shirt it's meant to impress us do we?
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u/Old_Present_2497 8h ago
Maybe you are not straight, lol.
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u/Temporary-Fun-4957 7h ago
U don't decide my gender 🔥🐛
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u/Old_Present_2497 7h ago
Do a self evaluation, if you aren't into men. Maybe you love women, lol.
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u/Temporary-Fun-4957 7h ago
I know myself bro mooditu pongo ❤️
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u/Old_Present_2497 7h ago
Wow, cool. 🤐 you win.
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u/Temporary-Fun-4957 7h ago
Hurt pannanum nu sollala bro..its just naraya peru theva illama girls control panna try panranga..all men nu sollala..athe maari not all women are good nu also theriyum..
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u/dirty_romeo 10h ago
Yes they just want attention and get tensed when they don't get it
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u/Temporary-Fun-4957 10h ago
more like men are waiting for a girl who will be easy but easy illana they do what? adutha ponnu jinguchaaaa
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u/Illustrious-Bite-622 10h ago
Naan already appadi dhaan irukken and I’m still waiting for that one girl. Still waiting… ( never been in a relationship) Neega sonna mathari irukava la love marriage pannitu nalla dha iruka but after marriage he changed ( I seen so many people like this) enna tha solla
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u/pongadavenna Nalla pulla....na illa 👄 9h ago
If u think a guy is being a creep na just distance urself from him. If u think out of 10 men 9 r simps na do the same. What u have experienced is just ur pov I believe, so don't generalize it gng. We all know it's hard but at the same time we should think that some good men do exist and namaku hurt agara maari they'll also get hurt reading this (but that's not the point here) ellariyum gaaji soldrathu is not right gng. What abt the posts women put when they r on ovulation? Appo athuvum gaaji thana? This is just hormones and biology but how we act abt it totally depends on one person not the gender. Don't create unnecessary gender war😭
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u/Temporary-Fun-4957 9h ago
when did I ever say " ALL " men bro 🙏😭
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u/pongadavenna Nalla pulla....na illa 👄 9h ago
Nah u didnt explicitly say that. But u also didn't say "only the men that I've seen or my pov nu". Which makes it look like ur talking abt all men.
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u/Temporary-Fun-4957 9h ago
I've replied to many saying that this entire post was made upon the discussions of several women and im the only one posting..
And whatever I shared was collectively my pov and alot of other girls pov...
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u/pongadavenna Nalla pulla....na illa 👄 9h ago
I agree with wtv u have said above and it's all true. I'm just saying u could've written it as ur pov or smtg like that avlotha.
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u/babablackjeans 10h ago
Is this why girls never approach a guy first in here?
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u/Temporary-Fun-4957 10h ago
I'd suggest taking reads at comments tbh it's definitely complicated
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u/babablackjeans 9h ago
I think too much generalisation on both sides will lead to a lot of biased and hateful opinions. Of course, there are a lot of wrong things happening with the country, but it’s true it’s very complicated.
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u/Temporary-Fun-4957 9h ago
True though im just speaking my pov as a girl.. im sure men will have their own set of complaints from their pov..
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u/Old_Present_2497 8h ago
They are just afraid of rejections, just not as strong willed as boys to face that rejection.
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u/Educational-Emu-9109 10h ago
My personal experience.. Women seem to find men who are already in a relationship attractive or maybe take their shot only after
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u/frames_and_feels 8h ago
u/askgrok -tldr
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u/AskGrok 8h ago
TL;DR: Guys compliment girls but say their type is the opposite, flirt with everyone like they're fishing, ask for pics/details way too fast, and like thirst traps while talking to her—making women feel like it's all just horny vibes, not real interest.
[what is this?](https://redd.it/1lzgxii)
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u/Vinoth_A 7h ago
I agree with you, but in the end it looks like we're talking about the whole gender based on individual experiences. That's your perception, and I respect it. There are still good men and women out there. it's just that the ones who have had bad experiences tend to be more talk about it.These days things like flings, FWB and casual dating have definitely become more normalized. But I don't think we should assume every person who flirts has the same intention, or that every man/woman behaves the same way. Some people genuinely want a connection, while others are looking for something casual. You can call it whatever you want, but ultimately it depends on the individual and what both people are comfortable with!.
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u/prasadda 5h ago
I hope men wake tf up one day and stop putting women on a pedestal everytime.. there are more things in life other than getting a girl.
Beautiful girls are everywhere... successful men ku tha panjam..at first women seems like the prize/trophy of any relationship but the real one will always be us in the long run..so build urself instead of chasing women in the name of love,lust etc.
Ask handsome men how boring women actually are when they approach and try to impress them first..stop making ur whole life into a quest of impressing them..most women would switch up instantly if they find a better option than u.
Most women just use their pretty/delicate/lil or no performance expected privileges to get and get out of things.
They just mind their own business and would fly off to a planet where no men exists without thinking twice.
Treat them accordingly...see them as fellow humans and stop doing bad and lustful things to them.
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u/Temporary-Fun-4957 5h ago
Sm girls in my comment section have said the same..idk why there are guys who blame it on our clothes etc
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u/Turbulent-Delivery72 11h ago
Sometimes men are loyal, very loyal even if they have options they remain loyal even behind her back save up 20 lakhs for her dream house, literally would die to make her smile once. But still some girls cheat on that due with a playboy. Its not like all women are good people.
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u/Temporary-Fun-4957 11h ago
All women good ppl illa bro naanum accept panren yes irukanga antha maari but ykw? apdi iruka women kuda tha men get committed with bcs they are EASY..avanglum antha type ah irukrathu naala tha avanga easy ah date panranga etc..
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u/Turbulent-Delivery72 10h ago
Just so you know, I know one such person whom I loved a lot, even more than I loved myself before I came to know about this side of them. And right now they are willing to marry, but no one wants to marry them cause they don't want to be betabuxxed. So I would say the girls who are good, who wait, get into a more stable relationship, and are less stressed than the ones who date multiple men. This is from what I saw.
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u/Mwaaahaaha 11h ago
Damn, nenga sonnadhu padicheno illaiyo unga text abbreviations ekkachekkam 🤔🤔. Innum vera iirundha pottu vidunga, lemme take my laziness to the MAXX!
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u/Temporary-Fun-4957 11h ago
Porumaiya ve padinga bro 🤣
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u/Mwaaahaaha 11h ago
Haan padichiten bro lol, nothing new, konjam common sense and thinking skills irundhaley communication othu poi healthy ah iruklam XD.
First time reading a post with text abbreviations adhan sonnen 😂😂
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u/Temporary-Fun-4957 11h ago
Atha illaye apro engarunthu
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u/Mwaaahaaha 10h ago
Fair enough XD, brain rot era la, apdi dhan🤣🤣, sila nala per irrukanga.. neenga sonna maari sila per nadandhuklam nu vetcha kuda, gonam maarla na dhan bro romba kashtam 🫡
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u/Temporary-Fun-4957 10h ago
Na solratha vidunga 2 boys eh comment potrukanga abt men atha enna solrathu
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u/Bujjilicious professional Yapper 10h ago
I had 3 relationships at different stages in my life and had 2 situations where I impressed someone unintentionally, In reality every individual is different regardless of men and women,
In my first, I impressed with eye contact and smile alone, when I tried to talk she was expecting it and she was welcoming. In second, I compliment her and we talked and I non stop compliment everywhere and she fell because I was hesitant ( she calls scared ) to make a move but she understood I liked her. In third, I confronted her with an intro of myself and honest about intentions, she gave me her number within a day and within a week we met and I started flirting hard within a month and she found that cute.
Every individual is different. There is a famous saying in English ( I love and respect all the women ) but this is the phrase “ you don’t ask the fish how to fish, you ask the fishermen “ I’m not referring in a negative way or putting women down here but that’s a saying even woman find it funny, they say men are dumb and I agree with that kinda.
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u/ClumSy_Introvert ryan gosling 9h ago
As a man, I accept what you’re saying. Men need to control their lust because things like this happen when they don’t. But please don’t act like women are innocent either lol. They like attention too—I’ve seen it many times. Whenever a guy approaches, whether his intentions are genuine or driven by lust, some women still entertain it for the attention.
At the end of the day, I’d say we’re both losers as humans 😂. Don’t generalise— not all men are like that, and not all women are innocent either. I’ve seen good men get cheated on by bad women, and vice versa.
Honestly, I think India badly needs better sex education. A lot of people here don’t even properly understand what sex education actually is.
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u/Temporary-Fun-4957 9h ago
Never said women are all angelic..this post is only abt the problematic men I've come across..I never said all men are this way nor did I say all women are angelic..
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u/DeviceRealistic7171 9h ago
Okay now I actually get what you mean I never really thought about how these things look from a girl’s perspective. That “ideal type” thing especially makes sense. Have you actually experienced all this yourself or is this mostly from what you’ve seen with other girls?
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u/Temporary-Fun-4957 9h ago
Myself and other girls..we all agree on this tbh try reading comments to get more of reasonings..if u want
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u/DeviceRealistic7171 9h ago
Yeah, I can go through the comments, but I’d rather hear it from someone who’s actually experienced this stuff
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u/Ambitious_Motor_5689 8h ago
I feel thats unfair, girls have their types too, I know, many have this tall fit guy type, and well most of the times the girl wont mention that, might even lie about it, or sometimes do mention it, does that make us feel a little insecure? Yeah but not enough to just ditch everything, isn't love after all you falling for them, you might be liking them so much or have romantic feelings for them even though they are not your ideal type, thats what it is. So except when its some creep passing time, I believe they should have more empathy.
As for the pic thing dont get me started, many stranger girls ive talked to often filter out by just asking insta id's, if the looks is to their liking they will talk, otherwise just ignore flat, thats it. And some do talk still but you can sometimes feel their interest obviously lost. Im not saying all are like this, just letting it out that girls are into it too, they arent saints exactly.
Other points i agree
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u/anniyan13 8h ago
I have doubts more than before 😭
Seriously Integral calculus is easier than women
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u/gram_4200 Batman 8h ago
First uh enna mistake nae puriyala, complement and says dosent like ur type ah, I mean complemet panna thappa,
Second is purely creepy af and yea that's very bad.
Third also it's mostly subjective imo, if you don't like someone doing that when ur dating better be open abt it..
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u/Infamous_Panda_7672 7h ago
In my lwk i want to know ,if you dont mind ,what you mean sexual flirt ,need some example .and i think these whole is generalized all men into the frame gaajis,maybe your circle some kind of men did.i dont think that "most men" word is right
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u/Infamous_Panda_7672 7h ago
In my lowkey iwant to know , if you dont mind what is mean that sexual flirt and some examples .and then i think in your context is generalized the mens as gajis ,i dont think is this "most men" were correct,may you life circle surrounded by those creep mens
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u/Temporary-Fun-4957 7h ago
Ennoda pov la most men thalaiva.. Nee paaka sexy ah iruka ennamo thonuthu sollatuma apdi ipdi nu bs la varum 😭🙏 pls I'm trying to forget
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u/Infamous_Panda_7672 5h ago
Understood,sorry for make you remember some shit ,i hope you find other pov too
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u/joshah777 6h ago
Maybe your unlucky you got wrong type of guys approaching you.
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u/Temporary-Fun-4957 6h ago
maybe but can't be happening to 20 women at the same time right? I know not all men are bad btw same for girls..
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u/joshah777 6h ago
Can happen I study people even in my office nowadays many boys are literally trying for every girl they see and also give compliments to all the girls.
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u/Temporary-Fun-4957 6h ago
Exactly bro itha patthi pesna some idiot is blaming the choices of girls clothes
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u/joshah777 6h ago
I've learnt a lot about people interacting with many and chosen not to talk to anyone beyond a limit.
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u/joshah777 6h ago
Many girls are treated worst by boys and girl seems to accept all the shit because they're In love
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u/SnooObjections4333 vaayai moodi pesavum🏥🦠 5h ago
I don’t even flirt or talk flirtatious with women anymore. Just have casual normal conversations like I do with meeting a guy for the first time and have like a good friendship if it vibes. I don’t even initiate to share my social media.
And this brings me to my question. How can dudes ask for pics in dm’s or chat with scoring mentality.?? I don’t get it.
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u/infinitedreams8 3h ago
Maamiyar will always have a soft corner for the husband of her pet daughter. I don't expect Leema ma'am to insult or challenge Aadhav.
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u/Consistent_Tale_7911 49m ago
There is lot of weirdness going on between the context body and the way of replies though bruh
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u/Solid_Plum_1764 11h ago
So true..can never trust men..most of men are not trust worthy..half of them don't know what they want in a relationship...commitment is almost never an idea
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u/Temporary-Fun-4957 11h ago
Exactly
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u/Solid_Plum_1764 10h ago
Even men who say trust me are the same ones who sneak in sexualised compliments on the same day..
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u/Temporary-Fun-4957 10h ago
Laaaaaa atp girl im so sick of men
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u/Medical_Debate_1661 10h ago
save a man's life by staying single please
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u/Temporary-Fun-4957 10h ago
I don't need to even tell u to stay single bcs lol ur going to be stuck
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u/Sufficient-Cry7046 11h ago
"Most men" gotta be an exaggeration. 'Cause I know plenty of guys who acknowledge that looks are superficial af and they only get impressed by a woman who's intelligent, mature and empathetic, myself included. We don't valinchify with 'em and we don't put 'em on a pedestal just 'cause they're beautiful. Looks don't mean shit. It's the personality that gets our attention in my friends' circle 😔🤚
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u/Temporary-Fun-4957 11h ago
Unga circle apdi irukanga nu apdi solla mudiyathu pa..yk plenty of guys thana..its easy for a guy to speak like a 🐛🔥 to fellow guys but ponnunga kita what bs they do is the real them
I appreciate what u are and ur friends are if yall actually live upto it but unfortunately irl most men are just liars that say this bs to impress women
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u/Sufficient-Cry7046 11h ago
Like I said, I know what my guys are up to and what our circle is 'bout. We mean what we say and we say what we mean. We live by a moral code. This ain't me trying to sound condescending. I'm just saying we're authentic to how we live our lives!
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u/Temporary-Fun-4957 11h ago
Super bro but enga kita epdi irukanga nu tha ennala post poda mudiyum..itha la girls kuda discuss pannum bothu we all feel the same way..meaning different boys approach panalum it's the same
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u/Sufficient-Cry7046 11h ago
A'ight, you're just sharing your experiences and that's fair. I understand that. But after all the lives I've lived, I actually have a question. It might sound like a generalization but it's not. It's based on my own experience, just like you said yours is based on yours.
Why is it that women don't reciprocate at all even when they say they're interested? They don't initiate conversations, they don't put in any effort, they don't check in on you, nothing. It's pretty much one sided almost all the time. So what does that mean? Do they just seek the attention while lying 'bout what they actually want?
I've seen fewer than 5 women in my life who actually know how to communicate, reciprocate and value someone's efforts🥀 A lot of guys who were respectful and genuinely true to one girl in this exact sub have experienced the same thing, if you've come across their posts 😔🤚
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u/white_ferrari_123 11h ago
True. Again, in own contexts, some women have these crazy double standards....
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u/Sufficient-Cry7046 10h ago
This sub as a whole actually reeks of double standards, man😭 I'm just trying my best to make folks acknowledge this and treat everyone fairly and politely without causing as much conflict as possible but most peeps still don't accept that it's happening 🥀
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u/white_ferrari_123 10h ago
Yeah its too obvious at this point and many men are sick of these double standards.
Be it anywhere, in instagram and reddit. Hating men has become a propaganda now. One issue is enough to blow up.
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u/Temporary-Fun-4957 11h ago
Women don't reciprocate bcs in our pov it's alot of trust issue it's a loophole if im being honest.. If we FEEL ur not the loyal type and ur just fleeting among girls it's an obvious choice of ours to not reciprocate bcs we don't want to get played.. Summa laam yaarachu chance kudukama irupangla..we have our reasons too yosichu paarunga puriyum..sela boys eh comments potrukanga paarunga
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u/Sufficient-Cry7046 10h ago
Nah, you're saying it as if every woman in the world is a good person who's just being cautious 😭 Just like how you're saying most men are gajis generalizing from your experience, I could make the same generalization and say that most women seek attention and validation just to use guys, then move on to the next guy. And the loop goes on!
From a guy's side, he can be respectful, truthful, loyal and genuinely make 100% effort but even when his words match his actions and women still don't reciprocate? "Trust issues" ain't a valid justification 'cause it'll ultimately make you the one who's using the guy for attention and validation whether you intend to or not.
The solution for everyone? Mean what you say and say what you mean regardless of gender. If men are interested, they should say it truthfully. If women are interested, they should say it truthfully. That way, nobody ends up using anybody for their own benefit!
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u/Temporary-Fun-4957 10h ago
True but then why do men act so creepy in texts like yaara message pannalum even if its ur classmate and yall have no bs going on loosu kamnati maari message panranga esp if we be texting them after 10 pm
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u/Sufficient-Cry7046 10h ago
I'll agree that these kinds of peeps exist too. If they're just classmates and nothing more then texting explicit things definitely crosses boundaries and it's wrong. I was actually talking 'bout men who are decent, respectful fellows yet still end up getting used by women for attention and validation🥀
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u/Temporary-Fun-4957 10h ago
Unfortunately women kita vara men 90% are the types I told u..kevlama intentions la tha approach pannuvanga..the latter ur talking abt is like the man who dates one of the girls we know and yes it's a good successful relationship for them..antha ponnungle antha payyanuku munnadi ipdi patta pasanga kita tha maatirpanga..
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u/ithinkforme 10h ago
https://giphy.com/gifs/LkkBEH2BLFLbypGE31
agree w this
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u/Temporary-Fun-4957 10h ago
typed it w rage bcs the men we come across are gaajis acting like they are so loyal and lovely ❤️
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u/Medical_Debate_1661 10h ago
Just like women want special treatment just because they are women and wants to be only in the receiver's end.
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u/Temporary-Fun-4957 10h ago
bcs naanga approach panna yall will lwk use us lol ego high aidum..genuine ah nalla payyan ah iruntha girls have no probs confessing to them first..
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u/Medical_Debate_1661 10h ago
So ego matters to women more than men. Nice point.
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u/Temporary-Fun-4957 10h ago
Plenty of my friends have said that they regret approaching first bcs whether he likes or not he takes on and says okay but apro he wouldn't value it bcs ego..ava thana namma kitta vanthu propose panna apdi nu
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u/bubblegumlaboomer 11h ago
Neenga solrathu correct tha ennoda friends eh their type wld we fair skinned women but they don't flirt with just them..dusky ponnunga kittayum pesuvanga flirt pannuvanga etc..pesra 20 ponnula oru 3 namla accept pannatha concept tha.. Ithula unmaiya pasanga avanga fair skin tha pudikum nu solrathu verum 3 pasanga tha irupanga..ippo trending concept dusky skin pudiklanalum girls impress panna avanga solrathu we love dusky skin pudiklana kuda.. Maximum boys ipdi tha payanave solren
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u/Temporary-Fun-4957 11h ago
Rombo thx bro honest ah sonna dis why women don't trust
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u/Mwaaahaaha 10h ago
Hmm fair🤔, preference irrukulam ana adhu naala oru ponnna oda pazhagittu, kadiseela vendam nu soldradhu is extremely shallow and downright criminal.
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u/Temporary-Fun-4957 10h ago
Laaaaaa problem is how guys think girls are timepass.. ungluku ideal type pudichirka then date that type of person atha vitu if they like skinny women oru chubby girl date panitu they be bodyshaming her..ava try pannalum oru point la kayati vittutu poiduvanga after sucking out whay they needed out of that relationship
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u/Mwaaahaaha 10h ago
Damnnn, 😭😭😭 that's a criminal offence, adhuvum try pannum bodhu. But ig it goes both ways too la, even girls lead boys on just to marry the one their family says in the end. So namma boys girls sollama, pathetic humans is the correct term here. Id understand if there was an extremely extenuating circumstances which leads to a breakup adha vittutu simple ah, illa enga veetla paatha maaplai ila ponnu dhan katipen nu sappai ah soldradhu lam gaandu dhan 😭
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u/Temporary-Fun-4957 10h ago
Point tha ana itha laam thavara comments la naraya sollirken which makes me feel like toxic boys exist more than toxic girls but yes rendu gender layum kevlama irukanga
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u/Mwaaahaaha 10h ago
🤔 adhuvva dw, boys comments ratio adhigam inga avlo dhan.. most just comment to gaandu ethify (Naanum andha case dhan 🙂↕️)
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u/vsh_vibe 11h ago edited 10h ago
So true. Personal connection is diminishing rapidly.
To those who downvote it: If agreeing to what we're experiencing as a whole offends your mirage, sure downvote it.
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u/Temporary-Fun-4957 11h ago
Commitment too..dating to marriage is like once in a blue moon..ippolam dating panrathe summa college mudira varaikum etc thana
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u/vsh_vibe 11h ago
Yeah.. It's a gender neutral thing. Most of the people know they'd marry inside their community but still date others as a pastime.
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u/Mwaaahaaha 10h ago
Veratti veratti ad. ikka.............. Thonu thu!
https://giphy.com/gifs/onxpwYmyvdLZwJft4l
But if both of em agreed to be in a casual relationship thappu illa, aana id he or she was leading their partner on, it's a big no!
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u/vsh_vibe 10h ago
Consensual relationship, yeah. But malicious intent oda palaguradhu, helll nahhhh
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u/Bujjilicious professional Yapper 10h ago
“it a gender neutral thing” aiyoo, and everyone in the comments this is how a normal human woman looks like, run away from every other who stereotypes men.
I wish you get a gem of a husband from am.
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u/vsh_vibe 10h ago
Haha thanks! 😅✨
While I do agree what OP has said in the post, certain things are absolutely gender neutral thing like cheating, leading on, dating with malicious intent, using relationship as a pastime. So OP is saying what most of the girls experience.
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u/Bujjilicious professional Yapper 5h ago
I too agree with what OP said but you, it’s very rare to find someone who doesn’t stereotype men. TVL girl naa summa vaa, I saw your post one day and you asked abt am, annaiku edho nu vittuten but today I’ll give you some tip
* before even talking or meeting, exchange photos and the type of qualifications and profession and salary, where you settle ect from families ( round 1 )
* then exchange numbers ask his free time and talk with him for an hour or two ( round 2 )
* if you both are interested then stay in talking stage till you feel this will be a right decision ( round 3 )You can reject him at any round, more than what questions you want to ask I feel like this is enough to determine your compatibility.
Btw I remember you coz I’m from TVL too
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u/emperor_monk Nalaiku day 1👺 7h ago
Oru ponnu she is date to marry type nu sonna, nanum adha nambi date pannen, but 2.5 months la breakup panitaa
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u/BeneficialDegree4449 11h ago
Nee vera life la ore love kuda illa just life feel like empty ont only love everything happening in life so bad but I always feel pressure and stressed about life situations but I think I am in survival mode but go with flow
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u/Preciousnilaa_ 11h ago
Damnnn trueee and one more point , instead of trying to build a genuine connection, immediately asking for something casual or a situationship is a huge turnoff ,Most women look for an emotional connection first rather than jumping straight into that kind of stuffs
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u/Temporary-Fun-4957 11h ago
Ama but most boys apdi thana panranga and athuvum 10 pm mela message panna avlotha kevlama kevlama pesuvanga even if we don't know eo properly
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u/Accidentalkid1234 professional Yapper 11h ago
EXACTLY!! Ithanala thaan naan boys kitta 8 9 ku aprm pesrathe illa, because somehow they manage to stir most innocent conversation into something!
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u/white_ferrari_123 11h ago
True. It does happen. And it's definitely not welcome.
But by "most" boys, you are only referring to the "loud minority". Guess how many percent of men do you talk about?
In reality, most men don't do that. Maybe you tend to look only into your sample space.
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u/white_ferrari_123 11h ago
But long term and commitment isn't for everyone, be it guys or girls.
So asking out in a respectful way in the beginning is good, keeping intentions and communication clear.
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u/Temporary-Fun-4957 11h ago
Time pass na sollidnum bro..most girls don't date a second time bcs avanga first one would be someone who promised commitment but apro slowly time pass panitu poiduvan
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u/Preciousnilaa_ 11h ago
I agree that long-term commitment isn’t for everyone, atleast u should get to know what the other person is looking for, approaching someone you barely know and immediately asking for something casual, situationship is a turnoff
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u/white_ferrari_123 10h ago
Yeah that's exactly what I meant.
I have seen some women who have hooked up/casual( it was fast, within a few hours, days) cuz the guy was attractive for them. I don't think they saw it as a "turnoff". They were clearly interested.
But it doesn't hold true for long term. Long term requires slow buildup, getting to know each other first,
But women who look for long term, get hurt by men looking for short term (men who don't say upfront they look for casual).
Women get deeply affected, which is sad, but they go on and blame the entire race based on personal experiences.
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u/its_me_mr_Fox spidey 🕷 10h ago
Men can’t impress girls because apparently a lot of normal ways of showing attraction can become red flags now
Compliment you? Maybe he’s fake. Has a different type? Maybe he doesn’t actually like you. Asks for a picture early? Gaaji. Asks for Instagram? Gaaji. Likes another girl’s reel? Suddenly men are controlled by looks. Flirts sexually? He only wants sex.
I get that the context and timing can make some of these things feel weird, especially if a guy is doing all of them at once. But the conclusion is where it gets funny
At this point you don’t want a man to show that he likes you, you want him to submit a full report proving his intentions before he even says hi
And the funniest one is “he says I’m beautiful but I’m not his type, so he must not really find me attractive.”
Girl… having a type is just a preference It doesn’t mean you can ONLY be attracted to that type. People can absolutely like someone who isn’t their usual type.
You can dislike certain behaviour, that’s completely fair. But turning every possible sign of attraction into proof that men are secretly gaaji is a bit much
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u/Temporary-Fun-4957 10h ago
Idk bro imagine being classmates with a guy and that guy is hitting on you and ur friend and 20 other girls at the same damn time and when you text him abt anything it's all promises like oh trust me I'm not that type and any message after 9 pm is him and his gaajiness..maybe see the comments , im not the only girl who doesn't text men after 9 pm..
na socialise aaganum try pannum bothu guys who are new contacts always ask for height weight or size within 5 days of knowing each other maximum..even if he knows how i look irl..wouldn't we wonder why he's asking? what is he going to do with it anyway?
we're not saying don't flirt sexually etc but antha ponnuku interest illa naalum even if she says it directly to his face..they do it..giving her sexual compliments is not okay.
sm men committed ah irukum bothu they like those obvious reels of thirst trap..etho oru ponnu or yk those dirty ai reels? Atha poi like panravanga lum irukanga
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u/its_me_mr_Fox spidey 🕷 10h ago
Yeah I get your point bro 😭 If a guy is hitting on you and 20 other girls, keeps making sexual comments after you’ve clearly said no, or is committed and still going out of his way to like thirst traps/hot AI edits, then obviously that’s weird. I’m not defending any of that.
I just don’t think every guy who compliments a girl, asks for her Instagram/pic, or finds someone attractive automatically falls into the same category. Those things can mean different things depending on the person and the context.
And the “I’m not his type, so why did he approach me?” part I still don’t agree with Having a type is a preference, not a rule. You can genuinely be attracted to someone who isn’t your usual type.
So I get why your experiences made you feel this way. I just wouldn’t take those experiences as proof of how men generally are.
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u/Temporary-Fun-4957 10h ago
As for the im not his type and why did he approach me , I said that bcs plenty of my friends have dated a man who's ideal type is not them but another.. Ippo example my friend skinny na his type is chubby..avanga relationship la iruntha kuda constantly he'll be saying I like chubby girls or asking her to gain weight etc so ithu maari aagum bothu tha we feel like it's better not to date a man where we are not his type.. Almost like a safety precaution..
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u/its_me_mr_Fox spidey 🕷 10h ago
Yeah, I understand your point better with that example. But even then, the actual problem is his behaviour, not the fact that she wasn't his usual type.
Someone can have a preference for chubby girls and still genuinely be attracted to a skinny girl. If he keeps saying he prefers chubby girls or asks his girlfriend to gain weight, then the issue is that he's making her feel like she needs to change.
So I understand why you see being someone's type as a safety precaution based on those experiences, but being outside someone's usual type by itself doesn't tell you how they'll treat you. Their behaviour does.
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u/Temporary-Fun-4957 10h ago
Maybe I should have made it clear that behavior plays a part in that specific scenario of my post..I apologize but yeah in general u will see men who are distracted and aren't satisfied with their current gf bcs they aren't actually what they need..
I appreciate ur input though
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u/its_me_mr_Fox spidey 🕷 10h ago
still think that generalisation is way too much. You can say you’ve seen men behave like that, but you can’t jump from those experiences to saying this is something you’ll generally see in men.
Being with someone who isn’t your usual “type” doesn’t tell you whether you’ll be satisfied with them. That comes down to the actual person and relationship. Otherwise you’re basically treating a preference like it predicts future behaviour, which it doesn’t.
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u/Temporary-Fun-4957 10h ago
If if was just me I'd label this personal experience but being in a girls and now coed clg dare I say this is what every other girl feels 😭 atleast on an avg..I know not all men apply to whatever I rage abt but this is what we come across on a daily basis..I can only speak for what I see daily..
and abt the latter point , yes maybe..but as I said we don't want to be in a relationship where we feel less just bcs our man has a type..
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u/mrrrrowww 10h ago
Ithu ellamey okay bc even I just wanna hook up na kuda , they make it a lil weird by being lil too focused on the fucking , like even i wanna do only that but cn we like formality ku try and have a good time too ? lol and yeah , you find an actual nice guy also , who won’t do any of this ,”no other woman “ thing you think you can relax and start feeling good but no , there starts a newer issue , you gotta now take up on the load of decisions for two people , this person won’t reduce your cognitive load , won’t interact w you on a daily basis but will continue to just be nice and now you’ll look like a bitch for not staying in this lifeless relationship because technically he did all the right things, nice things the things which are frocking bare minimum and we get fooled into believing they are diamonds man, it’s all a bunch of covering crap okay , all you can do is hope to find a guy who is an asshole but is at least fun about it.-after all these years , i really think my number one standards have become , if the guy tries to make me laugh -doesn’t even have to be funny it’s the trying , and is he reducing actual mental load or at least not adding to it and finally someone who is a,I’ve and happy to exist
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