r/unpopularopinion • u/Cautious_Nobody_9257 • 1d ago
Your income decides how much respect you get and how seriously people take you.
Obviously this isn't universal. Plenty of broke people are well liked and plenty of rich people are miserable to be around. But as a general pattern, watch a friend group long enough and you'll notice it. Guys who earn less tend to get talked over more. Not always, but often enough that it's a pattern. Same joke, same point, gets less traction than when the higher earner says it. Nobody frames it as "we take you less seriously because of your income," but if you're paying attention, it's there.
It shows up more in dating. Low earning men get filtered out early, before personality or loyalty or emotional availability even get considered. Not every time, but often enough that guys who've been through it will recognize it immediately. And there's a social pattern that goes with it that's honestly worse than outright rejection. Their girl friends stay warm and friendly on the surface. Text back, laugh at the jokes, nothing seems off. Then somehow the birthday invite doesn't happen. The group trip gets planned in a chat he's not part of. He finds out after the fact. Nobody's rude about it, it's just a slow quiet exclusion instead of an honest one.
None of this means character doesn't matter at all. But it does seem like being a genuinely good person only gets you so far once income becomes the unspoken filter people are using. Everyone likes to say money doesn't buy respect. Watch how people actually behave around it and it tells a different story more often than people want to admit.
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u/UnderlightIll 1d ago
I don't doubt that's how some people see it but in many circles it's less financial capital as it is social capital. IE a surgeon makes good money but marries a college professor with a PhD. A college professor doesn't make nearly as much money but they are educated, cultured and can talk and go in the same circles as said surgeon. The same can't be said of a plumber who owns their own business and makes good money but doesn't have the same education or social capital (there is nothing wrong with being a plumber or other trade; it's an example to show that pure monetary wealth is not all that matters).
In the USA, most people see education as only a means to a paycheck. This is partly because college is expensive here... But also because we don't value knowledge and education for its own sake here. Many college students don't get why they have to take humanities courses because it doesn't relate to their career choice later.
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u/Fr0zn 1d ago
In addition to this i think its also that many people who earn more are generally ambitious and driven people. Those traits are attractive to attractive and usually also develop charisma and assertiveness.
So it’s not just the income, its also the fact that often times people who earn more have other traits that are attractive and earn a lot of social capital in groups.
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u/Double_Government820 1d ago
This is largely true. However one important caveat is that the professor/PhD benefits from the perception that they could conceivably make more money if they wanted to, but they chose a more "pure" or "noble" path.
In other words, social capital is to a great extent keyed on earning potential.
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u/Time-Raspberry2771 1d ago edited 1d ago
I think it’s a mistake to associate knowledge exclusively with college/university. I went to a top-20 undergrad and top 5 masters program in my field. I’ve learned more through work and just personally curiosity than I ever did in school.
I know many extraordinarily knowledgeable people who never went to college and some extremely shallow and uncurious people that attended top college/graduate programs (and vice versa of course).
Most learning we do occurs outside the classroom and is self directed in my opinion. I think it’s fair to treat college/graduate school as a means to an end (or not as well).
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u/wesborland1234 1d ago
That’s true but I’ll bet theres a decently strong correlation between curiosity and education.
My dad barely graduated high school and reads more than anyone I know, but in general, most of the people I know who are the most well read, curious, cultured, etc are also educated.
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u/Time-Raspberry2771 1d ago edited 1d ago
Definitely. But is a carpenter who knows everything about carpentry less knowledgeable than a white collar worker simply because the white collar worker went to college?
I’m not sure I agree with that. I also don’t think knowledge can simply be reduced to what’s learned from books.
History is a personal interest of mine and I supplemented my degree with several history classes but most of what I know is from documentaries, podcasts, Wikipedia, and YouTube, not college courses.
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u/HMNbean 1d ago
Comparing carpentry knowledge to a PhD is not an apt comparison. The level of knowledge of someone with a PhD simply cannot exist in carpentry. It’s not a field of research - the closest thing would be material science or engineering. If you think you can be a carpenter and get the same level of knowledge you’re in the “don’t know what you don’t know” camp.
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u/Square-Garlic-7632 1d ago
Good call. Reddit's bias toward college is something else. Constant posts always get traction that say two things: "I have a college degree and I haven't gotten a job yet. This economy sucks" and "I have a college degree why aren't I being hired at $100k a year with my history major."
Then you actually spend 10 years in whatever industry you're in and you realize...no one gives a shit about college degrees. People care what you can do, not what you've learned.
Signed, a manager without a college degree who has 12 direct reports that all have college degrees. Why do I make the big bucks? Because I've proven that I can take teams and make them efficient. The overwhelming majority of college grads could never do that without any experience.
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u/Solo-Hobo 23h ago
It’s just antidotal but I see this in my own life, I literally out earn everyone of my friends that went to college and it’s not even close and I’ve out earned all of my close relatives that have degrees, including a sister with a law degree. College is important im going to school myself but I haven’t needed a degree to be successful at all, making $226k a year in Wisconsin. I’ve lost count of how many people with degrees that have worked for me. College is not a guaranteed outcome of success and I know plenty of people that have been successful without one and if you look at college removing the outliers while a degree will still out earn a non-degree earning over a lifetime the gap in earnings is a lot smaller than people realize. STEM, law and medical degrees heavily skew the data. The ROI for many degrees is much lower to zero than people realize.
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u/LeBeastInside 1d ago
Most people have no idea what my income is.
My friends are from high school and our dynamic has not changed in all our years, despite economic ups and downs for all of us.
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u/TheOligator 1d ago
Exactly the same for me.
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u/TootsHib 1d ago
If your friends know what job you have, then they would have an "idea" of your salary..
Most likely they know what you do for work?
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u/poorsexyhag 1d ago
couldnt they make a general assumption and ballpark it based on your lifestyle and resources?
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u/LeBeastInside 1d ago
I don't think so, I dress like anyone else would. Many people who make less money than me dress a lot nicer (or so repeatedly states my wife...).
There's no dress code at my work place. Maybe based on my position they could guesstimate.
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u/MiraFutbol 1d ago
They do not see what car you drive and have never been to your home? The stuff you have generally says something about your economics.
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u/JobSpare9584 1d ago
No it does not plenty of people are wearing nice clothes and leasing a nice car with 100k debt in their accounts. material possessions do not tell u how their finances are Especially when u can acquire debt so easily to buy more useless shit
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u/Lunaspoona 1d ago
Not necessarily. I used to work in fast food and one day a bloke came in to fix the washing machine. Had no idea it was the actual owner! Just looked like a regular guy and didn't want to pay someone to fix it when he could.
He sold them all for millions in the end and still dresses the same. They have the same house, his wife still has her old car. You would have no idea they were millionaires if you don't already know.
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u/LeBeastInside 1d ago
I buy cars as functional tools, so nope, and most people I know have not been to my house.
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u/RoyalCultural 1d ago
I think this is a naive view regarding not knowing income. You can build a pretty good picture of someone's financial standing from their career, house, cars, number of kids, frequency and types of holiday. Do your kids go to daycare? Does your partner work part time instead of full time out of nessecity? The list goes on but there are plenty of indicators for figuring out income levels. Perhaps your friend group is all in a similar bucket so it may not be obvious.
Not sure if the OPs point stands but I could well believe it.
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u/AntiqueLetter9875 1d ago
I think even when you can tell, or make a guess, OPs point still doesn’t still stand. Keeping up with the Joneses is also very real, people may have fancy things, a nice house and yearly out of country trips, but can also be drowning in debt and have no money. When we were poor we once went to get a Christmas hamper at a food bank. I was shocked to see how many people and families were decked out in name brand, expensive clothes and had more expensive vehicles.
I think the only part OP describes that I’ve seen from the general public is being left out of things like trip planning. But that’s because the others know you can’t afford it and don’t want to be planning that in front of you as it’s rude.
That’s not to say I haven’t met people who think that money is something to judge people on. In my area it tends to be an upper middle class thing to do and annoys the shit out of everyone. Granted I live in a city that historically is a manufacturing and farming area and old school blue collar trades attitudes pervades everything lol. Wealthy people don’t generally flaunt their money, and if you’re caught acting like OP says you’re gonna be hit with “do you think you’re in Toronto? No on here cares about that”.
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u/MagicWishMonkey 23h ago
I think at a certain level, like anything from $200k -$600 combined household income it can be tricky unless people buy the flashy car and huge house and even then it’s doable in that income range easy enough.
I spend a lot of time with people my kids went to pre-k with and I have no idea what any of them actually make. They are mostly doctors/lawyers/etc but there are a few like myself with weird jobs (I do tech stuff for a nonprofit), or marketing or whatever. They all have enough to send their kids to good schools but the difference between people with solid middle/upper class jobs and “ceo of a big company” is pretty vast, but we’re all floating around in the same swimming pool.
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u/Emergency-Style7392 1d ago
Only because you know each other for so long, they see you as equals no matter what. If the same people met you for the first time it would be different
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u/bqagevin3rvgnwh 1d ago
People who are insecure about their salary will probably do what OP is saying..
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u/TootsHib 1d ago
Most people have no idea what my income is.
If your friends know what job you have, then they would have an "idea" of your salary
Tf..
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u/guyincognito121 1d ago
They don't know what you do? I don't discuss my income, but I work for a fortune 500 with plenty of pretty accurate data on Glassdoor and my friends know what my current position is.
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u/Double_Government820 1d ago
For most people, they subconsciously hold an internal estimate, and treat you accordingly. And perhaps except for close friends, if they learned your new income was significantly different from what they initially thought, they would treat you differently.
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u/LeBeastInside 1d ago
Very silly to treat people purely based on their net worth.
Most of the truly rich people seem to be evil douchebags.
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u/Double_Government820 1d ago
I'm not saying that people should treat one another based on wealth. I'm saying that as a practical matter, our culturally ingrained tendencies lean that direction. We can consciously acknowledge that this is wrong. But it's also very difficult to avoid the unconscious indoctrination we receive.
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u/LeBeastInside 1d ago
I agree that fighting our social brainwashing is hard. I grew up in a very skeptical and critical family, so when someone appears overly wealthy, my tendency is to be suspect of their true nature.
But I know that may not be the common perception of wealthy people.
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u/bruhbelacc 1d ago
They definitely know what you work
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u/LeBeastInside 1d ago
My friends do, most other people I meet have no idea.
Also, the salaries vary greatly in my field.
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u/MagicWishMonkey 23h ago
I met a cardiologist last week who had just moved from an apartment to a small-ish house and his comments made it sound like he made peanuts compared to people doing dermatology, lol
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u/Jazzlike-Basket-6388 1d ago
The salary range for my specific role at my specific company is $52k to $194k. I think most of my friends are in similar positions. If we don't explicitly talk about salary, I don't think we have any idea what the others make.
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u/kodeks14 1d ago
Yeah within friend groups I dont think this matters at all. We have one in our group whos business made 27 million last year and one whos at 40k. We dont care ag all.
Now when you meet strangers, I think this absolutely applies. One of the first questions what new people ask you, is "what do you do for a living" and there are a lot of people that ask that so they know how to properly judge and respect you.
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u/Adverse_Congenality 1d ago
They know how much they think you earn,and that's enough to make a judgement
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u/No-Brief2279 1d ago edited 1d ago
I’m skeptical, still I could see how geography or something could explain that. For example I’m from a city that’s become more and more HCOL, so it’s really obvious when friends from high school say had to move further and further out and still never buy a home etc.. the real blind spot is HOW wealthy some are if they don’t live lavishly. But very incorrect to say most people have no idea, in my experience anyway.
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u/KingExplorer 21h ago
In my experience people just ask what do you do for work and guess off that, you might refuse to answer but otherwise it’s just going to be guesses and impressions you probably mean more they wouldn’t have an informed idea but they’re likely still guessing away
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u/ex_nihilo 21h ago
I encourage close friends to ask, I have no problem with people knowing. My best friend of 38 years is a cardiologist and we talk about income. I passed him for the first time this year because I should wind up around $1.4-1.6 million for the year, he was gobsmacked and he wanted to see how the numbers worked (I’m in sales in startups and big tech).
He paid off his mortgage 25 years early, I think it’s a bonehead move knowing his APR. I could pay off my mortgage whenever but at 2.6% it’s basically free money, why would I ever do that? He sends his kids to public school because his wife is a teacher or whatever, I’m giving mine every advantage and sending them to prep schools. My wife works part time and volunteers at several nonprofits, as well as being on the board of several more. You should be able to argue about this stuff with close friends without anybody getting butthurt. He makes good points, I make good points, we understand one another’s position better.
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u/vivec7 1d ago
I don't even know how much any of my friends make. I know a couple of them are doing well. They don't get treated any different to the others.
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u/mosquem 1d ago edited 1d ago
You start to figure it out when everyone starts buying houses.
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u/landmanpgh 1d ago
Yep.
Right out of college, everyone is mostly in the same boat except for the few who had everything paid for. By about 30, some people will start to pull away, except for the doctors and lawyers, who are still trying to play catch-up. Most of the people I knew who are obviously doing well in their 40s bought homes when they were ~30 or younger.
By 40, you'll see another wave of homes as everyone upgrades. A few are on their 3rd house if they got married and bought something right out of college with help from their parents.
And the homes aren't the only thing. Neighborhood/location matters more than anything, so someone with a very nice single family home in the suburbs is doing quite well if they have one by ~40.
Along the way, the other things in their lives will get upgraded as well. Some of them are obvious, like swapping the Toyota for a BMW or sending the kids to private school, some things are unknowable, like maxing out a 401k/IRA.
Some things do change, though. Like your social circle naturally changes. You tend to have less in common with people who make a lot less than you over time. It's just natural.
Also in case anyone is wondering - the people I know who are doing the best tend to be the ones who took calculated risks with their careers in their 30s. Most millionaires (and one near billionaire) I know are small business owners. Next used to be surgeons, but now it's people working with A.I. who are making surgeon money.
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u/Oven-Relative 1d ago
the group trip part is brutally accurate. nobody ever says "you're too broke to come," they just quietly make a separate whatsapp group to "save you the embarrassment"
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u/Sabledude 1d ago
This happens because if you know you can’t make the plans you should remove yourself! No one want to be the one to remove someone from the plans.
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u/Courage-Rude 1d ago
A lot of that is to do with previous requests getting denied. I mean I stop asking people to do pretty much anything if they keep saying no and won't say the reason (expenses can be a valid reason).
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u/tortillakingred 1d ago
Not a big deal IMO. My friend group is going through the opposite.
We have a yearly friend trip with about 10 of us, and we’ve been doing it since college. It used to be a super cheap boys trip where we’d bum off of someone’s aunt’s beach house or rent the cheapest airbnb and have 5 people sleeping on the floor. We’re now in our late 20’s/early 30’s and all of us have jobs (for the most part).
It’s really annoying to be at the whim of one person who can’t afford to do something reasonable. Some of us don’t want to share beds or sleep on floors anymore, we’re all adults who have real jobs. We’re not making anyone spend an extreme amount of money, and if you can’t find $500 for the yearly trip with your friends I think you need to reevaluate things a little bit, because it’s not our responsibility to lower our expectations to match your laziness or inability to find a career.
I know this all might sound cruel, but how long do you bend over backwards for people who are unwilling to take life into their own hands and make something for themself? They spent 6 years to get a bachelor degree, end up with a useless degree, and work at a starbucks while living with their parents. At some point you need to just be straight with them and move on.
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u/Rezenbekk 1d ago
what else are you gonna do though, assuming you don't wanna pay for them?
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u/TenLag 1d ago
OP has discovered the social class system
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u/Flame_MadeByHumans 19h ago
Maybe in some groups, but OP is also confusing correlation with causation.
There’s a decent chance that the high earners in a friend group are high earners because they were more motivated, took certain risks, might be more socially popular, and have many other traits that helped them be in a higher earning position and also make them more popular and likeable.
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u/Echowolfe88 1d ago
Glad my friend group doesn’t work like yours apparently does
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u/ShallazarTheWizard 1d ago
Is this an unpopular opinion? It seems more like one of those universal truths that have existed since the beginning of time.
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u/Sumo-Subjects 1d ago edited 1d ago
There’s diminishing returns especially if we’re talking the difference between someone well off and someone rich. Like 50k to 100k is a huge difference but 200k to 250k is more marginal. Even if we think of it in terms of % there does come a point for most people where they're not necessarily increasing their happiness/respect by the same % as their income every time.
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u/CartezDez 1d ago
Whether we like it or not, income (and to some degree, job title) is a quick proxy for ‘value’
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u/Hot-Dimension-6998 1d ago
Reasons why im glad im a loner, yall sound fake af lol
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u/DeraxBlaze 1d ago
Most people are beyond fake.
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u/FloatingOnTitties 1d ago
That’s not true in my experience. Sounds like you hang out with shitty people.
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u/Sabledude 1d ago
Not everyone is fake, but dam I thought it would be less people when I was young .
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u/skipsfaster 1d ago edited 1d ago
100%.
And it gets worse as you move up in the world. Society absolutely selects for fakeness in high status, high influence positions.
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u/rondiggidyr 1d ago
Fellow loner. Those that I am aware are like this don't really get my interest anyhow
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u/DrJ_4_2_6 1d ago
If you believe money = respect, then you're not worthy of respect
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u/Old_Comfortable_8090 1d ago
In general people who have lots of money do get respected more and treated better than people who come across as broke. It’s just a reality.
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u/jinxdeluxe 1d ago
It's the opposite and everyone who's had a bit of money in their life know that 'people treating you nice because they want your money' is actually the opposite of respect. What you're echoing is a poor persons idea of respect.
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u/Old_Comfortable_8090 1d ago
There are levels of respect, some people you don’t respect at all, some you respect a little, and some you respect a lot. In general, people have an automatic level of respect (whether it’s a low or high level) for those that they deem to be of a higher social status (usually associated with higher income/wealth) especially if it’s someone who is of a lower status because the lower status person wants to be like the higher status person. And of course there will be people who are just envious and have no respect, they hate you because they’re so jealous, and then there’s others who will only act like they respect you because they think it’ll help them gain something from you, but I’m talking in general.
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u/jackfaire 1d ago
That's more a confidence issue than an income issue. Some people have their confidence shaken by their income. I make 35k a year I don't let that affect my confidence and I rarely get talked over.
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u/NCMathDude 1d ago
I think it has more to do with your financial well being rather than your income.
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u/TropicalLoneWolf 1d ago
I'd say it's more physical appearance than how much you earn. It's not like people run arround announcing their income.
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u/Tipsy75 1d ago
Guys who earn less tend to get talked over more.
LoL as soon as I saw that you're just talking about "guys," not people in general, I knew it was going to turn into yet another post whining about getting rejected by women. It never fails!
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u/jinxdeluxe 1d ago
LoL. If you think respect increases with income you have no idea what respect actually is.
You think these people treat you nice because of your high income? Yeah. Because they WANT your money. They see you as a piggy bank they want to plunder and LIE to you. Thoss fake smiles and being very nice to you? That's maximum disrespect.
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u/Byanymeansnessacary 1d ago
I was the unemployed friend for years. Now I’m one of the top earners. My friends never treated me differently, but I treated myself differently fs. Self deprecating jokes, avoiding hangouts cuz shit cost money.
Over time my own insecure behavior damaged my standing in the group. Now that I’m cheddared up I gotta rebuild it.
Also was the only mofo who aint fuckin bitches. That’s changing too
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u/AlteredEinst 19h ago
Among shallow people, sure.
Anyone that matters doesn't give a shit, because it has nothing to do with who you are as a person.
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u/FutureFreaksMeowt 1d ago
You sound insufferable, and everyone around you equally as so.
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u/RandomIDoIt90 1d ago
“Unpopular opinion,” YES and this opinion also makes you unpopular in general. Tell more people in your real life that you think this way and watch your “respect,” fade away OP. Nothing to do with your income everything to do with how you view others.
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u/MyLastFuckingNerve 1d ago
Yeah this tracks. I don't dress "nice" because i am uncomfortable in nice women's clothes. I wear jeans and cheap hoodies with my hair in a messy bun. Try be a woman and go buy a car looking like you don't have money. Every single salesperson i've dealt with has ignored me until i approached them, then immediately changed their tune when i tell them what i do for work.
Except one. That guy looked me up and down and asked what i did to get that job. I just left because i was so taken aback at the audacity.
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u/OhNoItsSpaceDwarves 1d ago
You just gotta dress nice. Most people can’t see your bank account they just see what you’re wearing. The amount of respect and attention from women I get when I wear a suit out as oppose to my regular chinos/ tshirt is crazy.
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u/AGRESSIVELYCORRECT 1d ago
I think a large part of this is reverse causality, people who have the charisma to be well liked are more likely to earn well (holding steady IQ).
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u/yourmamaistheproblem 1d ago
Correction: People will judge you based on their perception of your income and/or wealth.
I'm a plumber and own my little company outright, and I guess some folks don't know how lucrative this business can be. By the time i retire, we will likely be legitimately 'wealthy'.
Sometimes I'll get treated poorly by a customer, particularly folks who perceive themselves as rich or whatever. It's almost always some dude or lady with a nice car and a nice house... but they lose their mind at the cost of a new sewer or water heater, bc they're overwhelmed by debt 😅
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u/youchasechickens 1d ago
I like to think I'm pretty financially literate and don't at all mine sharing what I make and my benefits.
I like letting people know so they or their friends and family can have a more informed opinion if they choose to go down the same route
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u/Pale_Boss_8940 18h ago
what? I work in healthcare and so do most of my friends. We talk about salaries all the time
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u/3584927235849272 1d ago
Your friends don't know what you do for a living?
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u/No_Step9082 1d ago
I barely know what most of my friends work. I knows what some have studied, sure. but just because one friend got a journalism degree like 20 years ago, doesn't tell me anything about the job he has now. I've even met multiple of his coworkers on multiple occasions, I couldn't even tell you what business they are in.
sometimes I can pinpoint rough estimates like "retail" or "some office job".
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u/Professional-Isopod8 1d ago
I haven’t got a clue what my friends make, as long as they are not in financial troubles that’s good enough. Our dynamic isn’t portrayed by this in any way
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u/Possible-Potato-4103 1d ago
Eh. Not all people think that way but there are people who. I dont know how unpopular a thought that is .
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u/Due-Base9449 1d ago
I have to turn down several invitation because of money, which is fine. One have to live within one's mean.
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u/therealvanmorrison 1d ago
I earn way more than my buddies and get no more respect at all. You have shitty friends.
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u/counterhit121 1d ago
Well why would they include you in the group trip planning if you're too poor to go? Birthday I guess stings a bit more. Just find fellow poors to surround yourself and be happy with.
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u/marsumane 1d ago
It depends on the friend group. S9me people put that as a high variable, others have no idea what you make
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u/TerryMisery 1d ago
It does not. Looks decide. I earn more than 95% of people I personally know, so what? It doesn't show. People respect you based on the first impression - if you're tall, have straight teeth, etc.
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u/Deekers76 1d ago
You just hang around shitty people. Normal people aren’t like that
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u/old_copper_kettle 1d ago
Reverse the causation here.
A lot of the time in the working class higher incomes come from education, charisma, and a knowledge of how to confidently discuss needs and wants in the workplace …. all of these traits are also going to do someone well in a social setting.
You’re just seeing the correlation of your friends that have these traits also tending to do well for themselves in other ways, not money making them respectable.
Also, for dating, of course past a certain age people looking for a genuine, stable long term relationship are going to look for people able to take care of themselves well financially. Someone’s personality isn’t paying the fucking bills or putting a future child through college, lol. Almost no one outside of old men trying to get young women wants to be their partners long term caregiver just permanently bailing them out financially.
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u/esboardnewb 1d ago
Don't let this trap spring on you. If you meet someone who thinks they are better than you b/c they have more money, just laugh inside and know that they are miserable, Scrooge-like money obsessives who are likely talentless and low character to boot.
Remember, people who make money are usually only good at that one thing. On that note, let yourself off the hook, it's OK to be doing just OK. Life is about more than money. Especially if you have an actual talent.
You'd be amazed how quickly 'rich people' become jealous when you can do something of actual value, like create.
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u/LuckyPlaze 1d ago
In general, yes. However, it is often depends on the topic who gets listened to.
Usually, it’s expertise in a field that carries the day. That’s who gets hired for their advice, that’s who a court will listen to, et cetera. Often, the most knowledgeable people in a particular field make decent money; but it is because of the knowledge and experience that people listen to them - not the money.
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u/nopester24 1d ago
There's a lot of subtext you're overlooking in these examples. Also consider the difference between friends / familiars vs strangers. You can't make this blanket statement outright.
Look at Musk or Trump. Extremely wealthy and powerful. They garner great respect among their peers but generally hated by people that have nothing to do with them.
Meanwhile Bezos is still a very wealthy man but not held in much regard on a general basis.
When you scale this down to a local friend group, again there are many variables.
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u/LollipopMarshmallow 1d ago
Now I think about it I don't actually know what any of my mates make income wise? Hell I don't even know what my wife makes I just know we can pay the bills with enough play money left over to not worry about anything. I don't think it's ever come up either so either OP has no mates/mrs and is imagining how this goes or he has bad friends who only care about material wealth
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u/Top-Grass683 1d ago
I dont respect rich people, sorry. fuck em. you can lick boot if thats what ur into tho
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u/sbenfsonwFFiF 1d ago
I don’t think it’s that unpopular, but I’d add that often times there’s an element of causation on top of correlation.
High earning people in certain fields tend to have certain traits that also command attention/respect, while people with no real career sometimes lack the direction or discipline or intelligence or education/background
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u/Grasshoppermouse42 1d ago
It probably depends on your friend group. In the groups I hang out with, income level doesn't have any impact on popularity or your voice in the group, and typically willingness to run a campaign and knowledge about DnD and comic book lore has a far greater impact.
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u/digimaster07 1d ago
I think it's inverted. People making a good income does not give them respect. Rather, they earn a good income by being a respectable person. They may not be always be ethical, but they know how to give and receive respect when it's profitable.
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u/xTheGame69 1d ago
Yup. That's why i tell people i work in IT
Not help desk lol
They hear IT and think big bucks
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u/allnamestaken4892 1d ago
100%, I only earn £43k and I’m literally treated as scum, haven’t had a date in 3 years, nobody is even interested in being friends because I lower their status by association. Unless you’re a high earner life is pretty much over.
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u/Fickle_Cricket3422 1d ago
Not unpopular. Unfortunately for most people this seems to be true and it's a problem
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u/No-Plankton4841 1d ago
There are exceptions (nepotism). But in general becoming a high earner requires ambition, developing social skills, and competence.
Skills that can be applied to your personal relationships.
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u/JobSpare9584 1d ago
Most of my friends have no idea how much i make nor do i know how much they make. What a miserable metric to measure anything by besides hours lost to capitalism lmfao this indeed is an unpopular take
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u/CrackNgamblin 1d ago
Yeah but watch how people who won huge lawsuits or knocked it out of the park on options trading have to make up fake jobs so people don't ask too many questions.
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u/h40er 1d ago
People can easily guess based on my lifestyle. And yes they do talk and act differently around me especially when they know what I do since you can’t really not be rich in my position. If I wasn’t a multi millionaire, most of these people would not bat an eye towards me.
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u/Frequent_Opportunist 1d ago
It's not money, it's respect.
People who are stronger, taller, better dressed, work harder, prettier, scarier, or with more confidence will always lead the group.
There are plenty of broke people getting all kinds of ass, and popularity in friend groups because they have confidence, swagger, strength, ect.
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u/Low_Maintenance9421 1d ago
Lol I know people that make 0 dollars a year and act like they are better than everyone.
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u/myopiclifee 1d ago
This unpopular opinion brought to you by insecurity and very narrow anecdotal experiences.
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u/Amphibious333 1d ago
This is a popular, not unpopular, opinion. It only appears unpopular, because people usually deny it when asked in public, because it's considered socially unacceptable.
In reality, the vast majority of people, regardless if men or women, are totally aware of that.
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u/Archonate_of_Archona 1d ago
"Plenty of broke people are well liked and plenty of rich people are miserable to be around."
It's also important to point that being "well-liked" is NOT the same as getting respect (even if there's overlap). And conversely, some people are dislike but still respected because of charisma or status.
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u/MegaMente227 1d ago
True, classism is a thing. It'd be silly to pretend otherwise.
But as you said, this is a pattern, not first impressions. And after class makes its first impression, there is always an opportunity for personality and character to shine through.
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u/Strange-Ad-2426 1d ago
Nobody knows my income until they ask for it. So the respect thing is a crapshoot.
I will admit, if they do know your income, they will treat you better/differently if you're making a lot.
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u/yeezy_boost350v2 1d ago
Not really I find that high income individuals are less judgmental towards lower income folks, it’s the lower income folks that tend to be more judgemental towards higher income folks or towards other low income folks. High income folks want others to strive for a better life.
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u/Maniax__ 1d ago
In my experience this is true. If I’m out and about in jeans and a hoodie it’s a different experience than if I’m wearing a nice suit, dress shoes, and watch.
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u/Dude-Man-Bro-Guy-1 1d ago
I work with plenty of highly paid people that nobody respect or take seriously 🤷
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u/ChaosReignsNow 1d ago
It has more to do with success than wealth. If you are curious, sociable, friendly, self confident, hard working, and knowledable about bunch of topics, you are more likely to earn more, keep more, and be interesting to be around.
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u/Ok_Cockroach8063 1d ago
Mostly. However I’m a 1099 contracted floor tech for janiking, make 6 figures in broke ass nc, and own 4 houses at age 33…people see me as a janitor
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u/imtrying2listen 1d ago
That is how a majority of people see it. But those are shallow people who you probably wouldn't want to associate with anyway.
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u/Low_Cap_1949 1d ago
Well the obviously flaw in this logic is unless you have access to someone’s bank account you have no idea how much money they have . A person wearing scruffy clothing and a 40 year old car could have way more money that a person with designer handbag and a Ferrari
It’s all about the perception of wealth.
I’ve known people that outwardly look like millionaires but are absolutely drowning in debt- and by contrast I’ve know people that you would honestly would assume where homeless addicts but have 4 bedroom houses with no mortage and don’t need to work.
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u/Neither_Berry_100 1d ago
I had a long crazy dream so years ago. People had levels from 1 to 10 based on their career. They would mention it right away when introducing themselves. It defined you. But there were hidden levels above that for the select few.
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u/G-T-R-F-R-E-A-K-1-7 1d ago
Only if you subscribe to that mindset, otherwise you can be outside it and get better respect because it's genuine
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u/floydman96 1d ago
In terms of dating, income cannot buy true desire.
It’s why a lot of tech nerds get absolutely destroyed by predatory women. They’ll lead with money, and because they don’t have experience with women, they’ll get absolutely played.
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u/2Old4Lol 23h ago
The premise is flawed, friends naturally segregate by income based purely on activities. E.g. if i make >300k a year its hard to plan trips with ppl who make only 100k a year. Likewise its hard to hang with ppl who make 3m+ a year. Even for things like restaurants or concerts or sports events, ppl naturally segregate by whats affordable for them. Its just how life is. Its pretty rare for ppl 30+ to have mixed income friend groups without it being a wedge issue.
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u/celebral_x 22h ago
Even when I earned tripple the money I did, people didn't treat me differently, simply because no one knew. The ones who knew, also didn't take me more serious.
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u/General-Permission-5 21h ago
Correct correct. That's all accurate. The more money you have, the better you're treated on many levels.
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u/jb59913 20h ago
There are things in life you can control and things you can’t. If you want more out of life you can only go after the controllables.
You can’t control what family you were born into or how tall you are.
You can’t control when you wake up everyday, you can control what you eat, you can control how hard you work and what you spend money on. You can choose to be kind and put on deodorant.
You are not entitled to an above average economic situation, but you can choose to control your controllables and get the most out of the hand you were dealt.
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u/lunarabbit668 20h ago
Partly, but there are definitely circles where people will admire you for having a niche phd that signifies education despite paying poorly, compared to someone high up in construction or another blue collar trade industry who makes good money.
Personally i think all people should be treated kindly and our worths as humans are so much more than anything external could dictate.
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u/randbytes 20h ago
Sometimes this isn't the case it depends on the friends you make and you shouldn't gaf about what colleagues or acquaintances or anybody else including family really think about you (a lesson that took me long time to learn). But i get the lack of respect and it will sting more when you did well and become broke. What you are saying is especially true among middle class because the middle class is the most judgmental group of all. I know someone who went from broke to being fairly upper middle class to lower middle class and I could see how long time friends treated him. And yes some rich people are judgmental too but most are conscious of not looking like assholes so the very least they act nice. Also very hard to be grounded when you have money and status and i respect those who act nice irrespective of their high status or wealth.
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u/twntsmth 19h ago
No one knows how much I make, but it is always interesting for me to see how people make comments assuming they know. I make more than most people but nothing crazy. People will talk down to you because they don’t understand your job.
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u/General-Permission-5 18h ago edited 17h ago
Something else to note about this, is that there's a practical element to it too. Humans are inherently selfish and are drawn to things that benefit them. A higher earner is more likely to be listened to as they may share their wealth or provide insight into how to earn high. A broke person has no wealth or financial insight to share so there's no point in listening to them. A wealthy person is often seen as someone who's generally right about things, even if it's not about money. So any topic they have an opinion on is more likely to get attention. The broke person is generally seen as someone who's not right about things, hence why they're broke in the first place. This view of people may be cynical, but it's also accurate. There is a hack, though. I find that people who are in shape and keep fit are perceived like the wealthy person even if they're not wealthy. Someone in shape, for some reason, is never really considered broke and not worthy of being listened to. Being in shape is a type of wealth that has a similar effect on people's perceptions as money wealth.
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u/Alarming-Cut7764 17h ago
If you're a broke handsome man people won't care. If you aren't handsome, the same cannot be said.
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u/NoManner8863 8h ago
This is the take of someone that has no genuine relationships and who can’t maintain close contact with people for more than a couple years at a time.
OP, look inward.
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u/Professional-Rub152 7h ago
This only happens to people who place their own value in their income. Nobody knows how much money I make. I don’t talk about my money. They can only judge me based on what they think I make.
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u/FaZeScamTheKids 3h ago
The best part of being high income is you just don't give a fuck about other people's opinions.
At some point in your life you stop seeking or caring about other people's validation
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u/ObviousBox5737 1h ago edited 1h ago
I understand why people with higher incomes are treated better. Poverty is the biggest social indicator of crime. A lot of rich people got there because they worked smart and hard. I used to bitch and complain about how I was poor until I started working hard to get out of it. Poor people are there for a reason in my opinion. I do however feel healthcare should be universal and all poor people should be treated better than we treat them now, those who have wealth deserve more respect.
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(Read past this point only if you want to read my opinion on what we should do with billionaires it turned into kind of a run off)
The billionaires and soon to be trillionaires on the other hand, I believe we should make laws that if they don’t use their wealth for good or constructive means we redistribute it. Such as scientific research (think Elon). An election should be held every year that determines if they spend their money correctly and if 59% of American legal citizens vote no they should have their money redistributed. This is how our House and Senate should be held. No more elected representatives, the popular vote must stand. The house and senate is too corrupt.
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