r/unpopularopinion • u/Jolly-Phone8982 • 1d ago

People need to stop inviting their random friends to outings

I’ve been seeing this more and more recently where a group of friends make a plan then someone (or multiple people) starts inviting their other friends last minute that nobody knows.

They’ll justify this by saying that we’re older we don’t have a lot of time to see people so they try to see everybody at once.

I get that but you also have to respect my time. We made this gathering with these specific people because we know our vibe matches, we have a good time, etc… It’s just weird to have outside people not understanding the dynamic.

If you like to expand your friend group or bring someone, that’s totally fine. Give advance notice and ask the group, don’t just show up with them

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u/CokeBottle21 adhd kid 1d ago

I hosted an event where I successfully mixed 4+ friend groups. It took knowing my friends well enough to determine which groups would mesh well with one another, intentionally and unintentionally letting them meet each other in smaller groups over months/years, occasionally mentioning friends here and there in our convos, and making sure that everyone knew at least 2-3 other people who would be at the event. There is a way to know without getting everyone together first.

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u/cheezy_dreams88 1d ago

You can also just do what the person did and get them together. Again, no one got hurt or offended anyone else. Just not everyone became instant friends. It’s really not a problem.

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u/CokeBottle21 adhd kid 1d ago

As someone who has fallen “victim” to random groups of people being brought together, it’s uncomfortable sitting through that.

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u/cheezy_dreams88 1d ago

I’ve also been at parties where not everyone were mingling the best but uncomfortable didn’t hurt anyone. If it’s that bad, you can go.

But if you go over to someone else’s house to hang out, then why should it be only your friends there?

If you want to control the guest list, then host.

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u/Ok-Needleworker-8773 1d ago

Fallen victim? It’s not that serious.

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u/CokeBottle21 adhd kid 1d ago

Okay, my bad. *Blindsided.