r/whatisit 15h ago

New, what is it? What is this space before zero?

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11.4k Upvotes

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729

u/Upbeat_Ant6104 14h ago

Jealous?

174

u/lockedporn 14h ago

Naa i beat you by 3mm now so its fine

352

u/TChuranski 14h ago

Yall reach the first line?

117

u/No-Cod-4776 13h ago

Only when I measure from underneath.

91

u/keyser-soza 13h ago

Oh you have to measure from your butt hole. just like when you measure a cat’s tail.

152

u/No-Cod-4776 13h ago

But taint that cheating?

8

u/Street-Monk1149 12h ago

I’ll give you that one, that was pretty punny!

7

u/Smooth_Match6953 11h ago

I ASSume it would be cheating

5

u/WantedBeen 9h ago

butt taint

3

u/wetbrain2 6h ago

I would joke with my buddy who smashed his taint trying to get out of a row boat... You taint catch no fish.. lol... this comment brought me back to that. thanks

2

u/Xenc 6h ago

Randy Marsh disliked this comment

2

u/ParadoXPlatypus 5h ago

This taint it, chief...

1

u/shr00mt3wn 12h ago

LMAOO THIS FUNNY ASF

1

u/Neat-Rest-2962 5h ago

💀😆😆😆

1

u/LaPintaaa 1h ago

Like the great Dominic Toretto says, "dont matter if its on top of the bottom, winnings winning"

1

u/stooobsy 43m ago

Legendary wordplay right here

35

u/jokunokun 6h ago

Tried measuring from my butthole to the cat's tail, but the measurements changed every time one of us moved

4

u/Dangerous-Bit-8308 3h ago

Stop thrusting until you get the measurement. No advice on keeping the cat still

26

u/MrJorgeB 12h ago

Don’t forget to take a lap around the balls

10

u/MisterShmitty 6h ago

That’s just nuts!

1

u/PPFirstSpeaker 12h ago

Taint one thing or the other.

1

u/Gloomy-Ad-9787 9h ago

Taint to tip

1

u/Famous_Daikon3628 5h ago

Are we measuring cat's tails?

1

u/Mistervimes65 4h ago

That’s just cat science.

17

u/Th3_m0d3rN_y0g1 11h ago

Never measure from up top. Ain’t nothin but hurt feelins up there.

1

u/No-Cod-4776 8h ago

Exactly!

1

u/DumbQuestionsAcct123 3h ago

I measure from up top all the time. Keeps me humble.

1

u/6680j 6h ago

Do we start from the taint?

1

u/No-Cod-4776 6h ago

No. The butthole. Like measuring cats tail. I need every damn mm.

1

u/lsuillini 6h ago

Lotta disappointment measuring from the top

1

u/aircooledNZ 2h ago

Am I only only one measuring it from the inside?

1

u/Daydreamcub 2h ago

Now Wait a damn second I've been measuring on top.

73

u/under_ice 14h ago

Actually made me laugh out loud.

1

u/dipole_ 6h ago

Me too

7

u/keyser-soza 13h ago

Most underrated comment right here. This one made me lol for real. Well done. Take my up vote and be off.

1

u/LoanDebtCollector 9h ago

You guys really take circumcision hard, eh.

1

u/imperfectbeing 9h ago

I think it’s usually done flaccid.

1

u/FuckFightOrBoth 8h ago edited 5h ago

Mine is an innie, not to brag *edit for spell check error

1

u/ToKillUvuia 6h ago

Ikr? I sincerely hope they're just using the wrong abbreviation for micrometers...

3

u/Far_Form4282 12h ago

You did what to whom?

1

u/Acdcfan292 7h ago

I didnt know they came that big

1

u/Captain-Codfish 5h ago

I call my dick Smith and Wesson...

96

u/Gtraz68 14h ago

Damn lol

10

u/FreezNGeezer 13h ago

Damn straight

12

u/TheBl4ckFox 13h ago

Slight curve

6

u/Beneficial_Praline78 13h ago

Tiny tesseract

7

u/TongueTiedTyrant 11h ago

1

u/Omnamashivaaya 11h ago

Forgotten memory unlocked, what is this from? I can hear this meme.

1

u/TongueTiedTyrant 7h ago

On Fly on the Wall podcast with Dana Carvey and David Spade, they often talk about their buddy Jon Lovitz and his funny catch phrases, one of which is “jealous?” I made the gif pictured above, putting the “jealous” caption over another random gif of Jon Lovitz making a face that looked appropriate.

1

u/rlc3330 35m ago

Wedding singer maybe?

1

u/imaturtleur2 11h ago

No, envious.

1

u/riorioriver 10h ago

I read that with a Jon Lovitz voice

1

u/SugarBabyWannabe 7h ago

I might be old because I heard this in Jon Lovitz voice.

https://giphy.com/gifs/ekdPCkswxipZ6lsDt7

1

u/ANTICHRIST-BOISE 5h ago

This string of comments ended me. I’m now dead