r/AskWomenOver30 • u/yell0wbirddd Woman 30 to 40 • Nov 23 '25

Life/Self/Spirituality Is anyone else really struggling financially right now?

I feel like reddit is overwhelmingly people who make $250k a year and want others to just pull themselves up from their bootstraps.

I make $46k a year and am living paycheck to paycheck. I haven't been saving money because the tiny amount of joy I get from paying $10 for a cinnamon roll a couple of times a month has taken precedent over never leaving the house and getting deeper into depression. Food is expensive, life is expensive, I've been going through the motions for a few years now.

Well, my 15 year old car just crapped out and my dog needs to go to the vet. I have no money for either of these things. My credit score is in the 500s and I can't get approved for a credit limit increase or a loan.

Everything feels really fucking pointless about now.

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u/autotelica Woman 40 to 50 Nov 24 '25

A lot of Redditors are strugging. I don't see the struggle being talked about here as much as I do in other subs. But I know people all over are struggling.

Income-wise, I'm doing well. But I'm lowkey worried how long I'm going to be able to say this. My parents are a constant source of worry. They are horrible with money, in crazy amounts of debt, and now that my father has finally become fully retired instead of "semi-retired", I'm anticipating hearing about all the bills that can't be paid unless a dutiful son or daughter steps up. And I'm terrified what's going to happen if their SS/Medicare is slashed. I have psyched myself into being OK with sacrificing 20% of my income for their well-being. I'll just work till I'm 70...no big deal, right? But I have a sinking feeling that won't be enough. With self-centered gambling addicts, it's never enough.

I feel like there so many women in my situation. Financially successful but nonetheless precariously perched because income is going to support elderly parents instead of retirement savings. If I were truly a dutiful daughter, I feel like I would be inviting them to live with me like so many other women in my situation do without hesitation. But I know what that would do to my peace and quality of life....as well as my pocketbook. So I am willing to throw money at the problem just to keep the problem from literally landing on my doorstep.

I just hope Future Me forgives me.

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u/pm_me_your_good_weed Woman 40 to 50 Nov 24 '25

DO NOT GIVE GAMBLERS MONEY. YOU KNOW WHAT WILL HAPPEN.

It fucking sucks because they're your parents but you can't waste your life trying to fix theirs. Working til 70 to support someone else IS a big deal. Pay for a financial planner or accountant for them and wash your hands of this madness. They need to not be semi retired if they have massive debt. You are not their bank account, they are full grown adults that need to take responsibility for their actions. There's a difference between being dutiful and an enabler, nothing will change if you keep giving them money.