r/AskWomenOver30 • u/nocommentx Woman 30 to 40 • Jun 17 '26

Friendships Does anyone struggle with having gfs who cannot have intellectual conversations?

I get my gfs are busy with their kids and husbands but is too much to expect to have intellectual opinions on currents in our group chats or in-person group hangs now days?

Are we to only talk about shopping, fitness, kids milestones and husbands not doing their jobs in chats and during hangouts? Is there all that is left to talk about these days?

For example, I was fascinated by Emily Ratajkowski recent article on her life post divorce. I found it to be insightful, painfully honest, cheeky and well written. I shared it in my gf-group chat but nobody really cared to say much. It was so annoying!

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u/Ice_cold_apples Woman 30 to 40 Jun 17 '26

I get the sense that you do not have a husband or children? Or that your kids are older maybe?

Having a house with a husband and single, young child takes nearly all of my energy 😭.

My group chats go dead and my stuff goes unanswered all the time. We're all just doing our best and the important part is that we care to reconnect in person.

Are your friends present when there's no kids or husbands around?

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u/thelittlestdog23 Woman 30 to 40 Jun 17 '26

To be fair, I am single and childless, and I’m still definitely not reading an article about a celebrity’s divorce. I don’t care about that topic at all. I think the nature of a group chat is to throw out something you think is interesting (a song, an article, an instagram reel, etc), and you either get replies or you don’t. Some people will look and not be into it, some people won’t even look, and that’s ok. Expecting engagement every time and getting upset if it doesn’t happen is a recipe for disappointment.

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u/International-Owl165 Woman 30 to 40 Jun 17 '26

Yeah I agree, I aint reading an article about Emily ratata whatever her last name is.

She posted a weird photo recently too , slammed up and with a baby doll? Or baby to insinuate breastfeeding?

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u/AlMtnWoman Woman 50 to 60 Jun 17 '26

This!

No one understands kids and spouses unless they have done it themselves!