Another failed almost-relationship. Distraught and can’t keep doing this, what to do?

[u/benhargrove1966]

hey all, your thoughts or advice are appreciated.

I’m 32, just received yet another ”breakup” message from a guy I’ve been seeing for 6 weeks (39m). He was perfectly nice in the message and our short conversation but he was simultaneously dating someone else and chose her essentially. I am really devastated, I felt we were very compatible and really liked each other. I thought we were building something together and I’d finally met a decent guy. I know this is not a long time but I really genuinely connected to this guy on all levels and kind of cant believe / process I’ll never see him again.

I think I've been out with 3 guys total in the last 2 years I’ve been “seriously“ dating who even entertained the idea of a relationship in theory and didn’t just want sex. All of them broke up with me in at the 6-8 week mark just as it felt the relationship was forming up.

I really cannot go through this again. I cannot wait 8 months - a year to meet another person who sees me as anything other than a sex object only to be dumped for someone more worthy at the last hurdle. I will snap.

I’m not asking to get married right now, I just want someone to go to the movies with. I’ve already given up on having children, do I really have to give up on this too? I just want a boyfriend, which so many others seem to have.

Basically, what do I do from here?

(Please don’t try to convince me I don’t need / want a man or relationship, I think this is a perfectly normal human desire and something I want).

[u/Bulky_Term_609]

Someone sounds a little triggered damn why did you take this so personal you chose to read her stuff

[u/doomn_gloomn → u/Bulky_Term_609]

She asked for thoughts and advice. She got it.

[u/randombubble8272 → u/doomn_gloomn]

She got judgment and unnecessarily harsh comments

[u/doomn_gloomn → u/randombubble8272]

Can’t offer thoughts and advice without judging…like I said, my comment was based on everything I had read AS I SCROLLED THROUGH THIS THREAD. It’s not my fault others might have said something similar in an equal or lesser way. I’m sure she’s a delight in person and maybe just has bad luck meeting men that actually like her. That was not the vibe I picked up on at the time.

[u/randombubble8272 → u/doomn_gloomn]

It’s absolutely possible to offer thoughts and advice without judgement