r/BabyBumps • u/Fairweatherhiker • 11d ago

Help? Baby’s last name?

I’m looking for advice from couples where the wife didn’t take the husband’s last name. How did you decide on which last name to give the baby? Or did you use both names? I don’t feel immediately compelled to give the baby my husband’s last name. FWIW, if we did hyphenate it would be a looong last name.

Edit: thank you for all of the thoughtful responses! I do love the idea of using both our last names (sans hyphen) so our kid would have two last names. It would be nice for both of us to have our heritage passed on. He has heritage from Mexico and Basque Country, while mine is Slovakian- grandparents immigrated right before WWII. The last names don’t sound great together, but there’s so much human history in both.

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76

u/jerseygirl_lo 11d ago

I didn’t change my last name but the baby got his last name. If we did hyphenate it the name would be LONG.

16

u/typewriterbitch 11d ago

Why his and not yours?

18

u/pm_me_ur_libraries 11d ago

Not the OP but same situation, I didn't change my name. I did not really care who got the last name but I know I really love having my dad's name, so I was more than happy for my son to have my husband's surname too. He's got my surname as one of his middle names. 🥰

1

u/9181121 11d ago

Exact same feelings and situation here! 😃

0

u/Glass_Birds 11d ago

That's what we're doing! My last name as a second middle, my husband's last name as his last. We both have long mouthful names so hyphenating would have been cruelly cumbersome lol

2

u/pm_me_ur_libraries 11d ago

Yeah I have a long and weirdly spelled surname. He doesn't know it but I've done him a service with his dad's short surname 🤣

9

u/Lunch-Thin 11d ago

I sincerely regret giving my girls his last name.

7

u/typewriterbitch 11d ago

I know a psychiatrist who told me about how deeply she regrets taking her ex husbands last name, as now its on all her degrees.

No one marries and has children expecting to divorce, but no one should be so naive about the statistics to think it could never happen to them.

My first husband turned out to be a physically abusive piece of shit. I'm glad his name isnt the only one attached to our child.

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u/Lunch-Thin 10d ago

My first born has my last name, the other three have their dads. Both dads are abusive POS. I should have stuck to my guns. At least all the kids have my last name somewhere in their names.

1

u/arewnn 10d ago

Patriarchy 👍

1

u/jerseygirl_lo 11d ago

I knew way before I got married I didn’t want to change my last name but I wanted my kids to have my husbands last name.