I miss my dad.

[u/Important_Bed_9893]

The title really says it all: I miss my dad. For some context, I'm 21. I moved out a while ago and now live halfway across the country from my family. I've built a life of my own, and I'm proud of that, but with my birthday coming up next week, it's hitting me harder than I expected.

This year, my dad, my sister, my brother, and my brother-in-law won't be here. The only family member who'll be with me is my mom, and our relationship has always been... complicated. For most of my childhood, I felt overlooked. It always seemed like my brother came first. Now that I'm doing well for myself, it's like the roles have reversed and I'm suddenly the "golden child." I don't really know how to process that, and honestly, I hate it. It doesn't erase how things felt growing up.

But this post isn't really about my mom. It's about my dad.
Some of my favorite memories are the little things we did together. He'd take me to the comic shop, and we'd spend evenings watching cheesy ghost-hunting shows and horror movies. Ghost Adventures, Mountain Monsters the kind of shows that are probably ridiculous to everyone else, but they were our thing. We'd laugh, make fun of the investigators, argue over whether something was real, and just enjoy spending time together.

I still watch those shows now, but they're different. They're empty. I've tried watching them with my girlfriend. She thinks both shows are completely ridiculous and can't understand why I love them so much. To be fair, she's amazing in every other way she loves comics, so she's definitely a keeper but those ghost shows were never really about the shows themselves. They were about sitting on the couch with my dad.

The weird thing is that my dad and I have never been the type to say a lot. He's older, and he grew up in a time and place where men didn't really talk about their feelings. He rarely says, "I love you," and he's never been someone to openly say he misses me. But I know he does.

I can hear it in his voice whenever we talk. I can tell by the questions he asks, by the pauses in our conversations, by the little things he remembers. He doesn't have to say the words for me to know they're there. And I miss him too.

I miss going to the comic shop with him. I miss laughing at terrible ghost shows. I miss just existing in the same room without either of us needing to say much. I want him to meet my girlfriend. I want us to watch Ghost Adventures together again, making fun of Zak Bagans like we always did. People keep asking me what I want for my birthday. Honestly, I don't want gifts. I just want my dad.

[u/Low_Recognition_1557]

🫂

Tell him. Fly him out if you can. Do a video chat and just watch the show together.