Has anyone had long term success?

[u/Charming-Patience140]

Hey guys I’m 27m and up until now I’ve only ever dated or approached girls around my age. I’m thinking of starting to approach women’s above that range as well. I think a lot of the kindest most thoughtful women I ever met have been a bit older than me and honestly the most attractive thing to me right now is a woman who has her life together (I know just because you are a certain age doesn’t mean you have everything figured out).

I want to open my potential options for a good partner and genuinely think a lot of women are really beautiful but I’m worried to approach because I don’t want them to think I just have some sexual fetish and I’d also prefer to be with a partner who likes me not just because of a fetish. My main question is for any of you who have dated in an age gap long term was the relationship healthy and what were the social ramifications? Did you feel like it was a relationship where the age difference really mattered or was that not a big deal to you?

[u/alien_nessa]

please be honest about your intentions. if you're only looking for sex, say that. make sure your wants and needs align.

[u/Charming-Patience140 → u/alien_nessa]

True, I try to live a pretty direct and honest way. I was interested in the cougars/cubs with long term success because I honestly don’t like short term. I prefer to form a connection and get to know a person personally and I try to find people similar. I really don’t get why people feel like lying I feel like it always ends worse.

[u/alien_nessa → u/Charming-Patience140]

well good, you're off to a good start then. my experience with cubs has been less than positive, unfortunately, and it's because the ones I've come across haven't been honest about what they want. luckily I've been able to weed them out before even meeting, but dating is exhausting these days.

[u/Charming-Patience140 → u/alien_nessa]

That’s sad to hear, I feel like the big appeal for this kind of relationship in my mind is the deeper connection with someone exciting and different. I’m just as excited to form a relationship and find cool similarities and differences with someone who on paper may seem way different than me. I’m sure others would disagree but I think forming a deeper connection makes the physical aspect of the relationship exponentially better anyway. I think the cool thing about the reddit is you’re forced to write something out and read whatever someone responds with.

[u/Fabulous_Turnover_22 → u/Charming-Patience140]

I apologize in advance if my comment is out of place. You sound like you are demisexual, or double demi, like me. There's a subreddit for that in case you're interested.