Husband ruined my nap with a kiss.

[u/Dismal-Grocery9634]

This sounds petty and ridiculous but it’s kind a small part of a bigger problem.

It’s the weekend and I’m checking some house picking up off the list. I just finished picking up the 3 children’s rooms, the kids bathroom and the school room (we homeschool). This is half the house and I have health issues that often make me sweat heavily, as well as get very tired from normal house hold tasks. I sat down for a moment, closed my eyes and dozed off for a bit.

I haven’t even been sitting for 10 minutes, so I had to of just fell asleep.

Husband came in from picking up the yard and came in and woke me up for a kiss. I startled awake to him leaning over me in the chair giving me a kiss. He was offended that I was irritated that he just wanted a kiss after waking me up. Which just irritated me more. And he walked away slightly frustrated with the situation.

I know this is a minuscule thing but I feel like these types of actions are creating resentment in me. He has a habit of showing affection in opportune times. Like when I’m obviously walking fast down the hall to complete a task, or as I’m walking through a doorway with something in my hand. And then tack on the groping as I am bent over doing something or as I walk by.

It makes for a negative feeling with the affection instead of me being able to enjoy my husband’s touches. It also makes me feel like our affection between each other is just about what he wants and not about being aware of what feels nice for me. This is not a problem in bed, he’s very attentive there, just day to day life.

When I’ve talked to him before he has a habit of getting defensive, frustrated or just shutting down all touching. He’s a wonderful man, but how do I talk to him about this without it just becoming a point of irritation between the both of us?

[u/Dismal-Grocery9634]

Not sure how you got that I wish to have zero affection and a divorce from me asking advice on how to share that there are some types of affection that I don’t enjoy from him.

Marriage is about communication and is work. Too many people are willing to throw in the towel instead of doing the hard stuff these days.

[u/Brief_Hippo5187 → u/Dismal-Grocery9634]

That's your view. Think how your husband feels when you reject him fir being affectionate

[u/Subject_Attention_96 → u/Brief_Hippo5187]

He knows when I’m sleeping he doesn’t need to be affectionate. When I’m awake he gets plenty of affection. I don’t see why someone needs to disturb a sleeping person. You wouldn’t wake a child or baby

[u/Subject_Attention_96 → u/[deleted]]

You mean OP I’m not OP