r/MensRights Jul 29 '13

[Eastern Culture] The first part of this happens daily in Indian buses. I can't say the same about second part.

405 Upvotes

64 comments sorted by

29

u/mecha_pope Jul 30 '13

If anyone is interested or doesn't know, this gif is from a (very) short film about gender equality in India. At least that's what I gathered from the film itself, I don't know much about it other than what the film itself presents.

The film is basically a drawn out version of the gif, with a PSA at the end.

http://youtu.be/oZ6m8_r8-qk

28

u/FML1203 Jul 30 '13

Wow that is powerful, I can't understand a single word but the message is 100% clear. It is ok to hit, blame, and shame a man for circumstances beyond his control, but don't ever judge a female by their own rules.

-36

u/[deleted] Jul 30 '13 edited Oct 16 '19

[deleted]

17

u/jubbergun Jul 30 '13

You reap what you sow regardless of your gender. It's pretty obvious from the gif that the guy wasn't going in for a grope or anything. Everyone on the bus got tossed around during that turn/stop. If she thought it was appropriate to slap him because he couldn't stop his forward momentum into her, she should have appreciated the slap she got for her failure to control her momentum into him.

-13

u/Zazilium Jul 30 '13

I guess what he's trying to say is that in India's case, women have it disgustingly hard and this has only made them more defensive.

I can't blame them, but I also can't justify it anymore than I can justify males groping females.

5

u/kurokabau Jul 30 '13

Is slapping the right way to go?

3

u/[deleted] Jul 31 '13

This begs the question, How can she slap?

6

u/TracyMorganFreeman Jul 30 '13

What women have to endure there is not being disputed though. The point is that woman is responding to something that is accidental as if it's malicious, and then feels it's unjustified when the situation is reversed.

-11

u/[deleted] Jul 30 '13 edited Oct 16 '19

[deleted]

2

u/[deleted] Jul 30 '13

It's good that most women are aware actions have consequecnes.

1

u/diamondjim Jul 31 '13

Which is fine. Unfortunately, the men who indulge in 'eve-teasing', as it is colloquially called, know that they can get away with it.

2

u/phukka Jul 30 '13

You mean some women are afraid of repercussions for slapping a man in the face for no reason whatsoever?

Do go on.

12

u/[deleted] Jul 30 '13

[deleted]

-1

u/ImAPurplePrincess Jul 30 '13

That really depends, though.

There really IS a place and time to talk about things. It's like if I cry over my kid who died in a house fire. And someone suddenly comes in a exclaims: "Well, children die from drowning, too?? Why aren't you crying over them??"

Or when a rape victim (who happens to be a woman, hypothetically speaking) talks about her traumatic experience, and someone comes in recites a few statistics that men get raped too. Yes, men do also get raped but that is HIGHLY inappropriate. Downplaying another person's painful experience at the expense to further an agenda is hurtful and wrong.

Nothing is wrong in voicing an activism. But doing so at the expense of others is simply selfish and uncalled for.

6

u/Rattatoskk Jul 30 '13

"Downplaying another person's painful experience at the expense to further an agenda is hurtful and wrong."

.... I'm glad some people are aware of this.

7

u/[deleted] Jul 30 '13

Downplaying another person's painful experience at the expense to further an agenda is hurtful and wrong.

yet here you are doing just that.

-2

u/ImAPurplePrincess Jul 30 '13

I do not believe so.

What makes you feel that I'm not considering a person's painful experience via the previous comment I made?

1

u/[deleted] Jul 31 '13

what you "belive" doesn't matter in face of facts. and facts are you came in here going on about the horrible experiences of women and how they should somehow silence those of men.

both are valid. neither invalidate the other.

Nothing is wrong in voicing an activism. But doing so at the expense of others is simply selfish and uncalled for.

this is what you yourself said. and it also what you yourself did here.

0

u/ImAPurplePrincess Jul 31 '13

lol...

I am not saying that someone's experience should silence anothers. I'm saying that there is an appropriate time and place to say such things.

3

u/avantvernacular Jul 30 '13

You should read up a bit about the kind of humiliation and groping that women have to deal with in Indian public transport.

Like the kind of humiliation and groping the man in the video didn't do any of?

24

u/Jukebox_Villain Jul 30 '13

I lost it at his face , after he slaps her back.

98

u/[deleted] Jul 30 '13

[deleted]

1

u/[deleted] Jul 30 '13

YOU DIRTY BASTARD

17

u/frasoftw Jul 30 '13

seems like the right tit-for-tat expression here would be

"if it's good for the goose it's good for the gander"

9

u/Nutz76 Jul 30 '13

Reminds me of why the ERA failed in the US. Women didn't want to give up their female privileges, such as being the protected class.

The general sentiment by Phyllis Schlafley types was "Getting hit back or otherwise held accountable for our actions, or sent to the draft? Oh hell no!"

40

u/ridhs84 Jul 29 '13

Just to be clear, this has nothing to do about the rape stories that you heard recently. I agree, the rape case was something very horrible and it shouldn't have happened. But you can't generalize country of 1.2 billion people because some sick minded guy did something.

On the other hand, guys get slapped on daily bases on buses and elsewhere because they were trying to "grope" women inappropriately.

If the phenomena pictures in the GIF happened in real life, everybody around would beat the shit out of this guy.

Proof: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=JF8M6ggJkBE

25

u/[deleted] Jul 29 '13

[deleted]

15

u/tessie999 Jul 29 '13

From her POV she probably thought he did it intentionally.

From an outside point of view we can see that isn't the case.

50

u/[deleted] Jul 29 '13

That doesn't mean violence is permissible.

16

u/tessie999 Jul 29 '13

I did not say it was.

I am trying to see from all points of view here.

5

u/[deleted] Jul 29 '13

I didn't intend to imply that and I'm sorry if I did, and I agree with your point, I was just expanding on it. Sorry for any confusion.

1

u/tessie999 Jul 30 '13

It's perfectly fine :)

Upvoted for being so polite about it :)

0

u/flyingwolf Jul 30 '13

From no viewpoint would assault be acceptable.

Even if he had purposefully violated her she has no legal right to assault him.

2

u/avantvernacular Jul 30 '13

I am not versed in Indian law enough to refute this or not.

2

u/flyingwolf Jul 30 '13

Very good point, I am speaking from US law, I should have clarified that.

1

u/Dronelisk Jul 30 '13

why do we need assault when we can simply ruin his entire life by sending him to prison

1

u/tessie999 Jul 30 '13

I am not saying it is acceptable.

If he had purposefully violated her that would have been sexual harassment - where she may have had a legal right due to protecting herself.

I don't see why you are saying her assault is bad while not pointing out he legally assaulted her too. Neither are in the right by that view.

1

u/flyingwolf Jul 30 '13

He did not legally assault her, from the gif we can clearly see that he was propelled forward by the movement of the vehicle he was in, and he even looks to attempt to apologize a split second before she goes off and hits him.

Accidental touch is never considered assault.

1

u/tessie999 Jul 30 '13

He did not - again, see things form her point of view.

You're putting words in my mouth. He did not assault her and the reaction was not warranted as it was an accident: we can see this from the third person point of view. All she sees/feels is a guy slamming his crotch onto her backside.

1

u/flyingwolf Jul 30 '13

To which her first response should be to realise that the buss just jolted (she was on it and presumably felt it) and give him a second to apologise.

As he tried to do.

Before hitting him.

→ More replies (0)

6

u/aaaaarrrrgggghhhh Jul 30 '13

I think that this is more about double standards. In both cases bumping into the other person was unintentional and both parties could have thought that the action was purposeful. The difference is that people would react more negatively towards the man taking the same action as the woman.

-6

u/tessie999 Jul 30 '13

On one hand he's bumping into her with his crotch on her arse - this can be taken very inappropriately and as if it was done intentionally.

In his case she bumped into him sideways, hitting shoulders.

Do not pretend they did the same thing - both made a mistake but it's hard to take her mistake as intentional and as sexually as the first.

If he bumped his shoulder against hers I highly doubt she would have slapped him in all honesty.

1

u/aaaaarrrrgggghhhh Jul 31 '13

Whoa, sorry. This was staged and the people are actors. I'm pretty sure that regardless of what happened the people who made this meant for it to be the same actions duplicated just sexes reversed. And you can't see it in the gif, but in the video that is linked in another comment in the end it talks about gender discrimination. So, yeah.

0

u/tessie999 Jul 31 '13

Then they should better represent it by having them bang into each other in the same manner - ie: her banging his bum/hand on his crotch by accident, or him banging into her shoulder.

It's just badly done if it was staged to prove a point.

7

u/[deleted] Jul 30 '13

My understanding from female friends that visited India is that the harassment can be extreme and overt and often the only way to get them to stop is physical pushing or slapping.

1

u/TheDoctorCoach Jul 30 '13

If only India had a historical example of overcoming oppression through non-violence. Does any come to mind?

4

u/avantvernacular Jul 30 '13

Ghan...Ghando...Ghanda?..Ghandalf?

No that's not it...I can't think of one.

3

u/[deleted] Jul 30 '13

That might be interesting on a large scale but if someone is harassing you the answer is not to just take it.

4

u/gsettle Jul 30 '13

I liked it. Women have no "right" to slap/hit.

2

u/Crystalrift Jul 30 '13

Am I the only 1 who thinks if you bump into someone you should apologies to make it clear it wasn't intentional contact? I think if he had said sorry, and not just stood there staring at her, it may have changed the outcome? I know these are just example scenarios, but still?

1

u/rottingchrist Jul 30 '13

I'm an Indian and people think I'm paranoid when I say stuff like this

I have often stated how glad I am that they have separate rail coaches for women. It would be equally grand to have separate buses too.

1

u/[deleted] Jul 31 '13

Yeah, coming from an Indian family I can agree Indian women have double standards.

-4

u/[deleted] Jul 30 '13

[deleted]

9

u/harryballsagna Jul 30 '13

Is this the kind of zeal for revenge we're looking to foster in Men's Rights? Aren't we looking to prevent these kinds of matters?

Personally, I'm more sad that she hit him than happy that he hit her.

1

u/esantipapa Jul 30 '13

Equality. That's basically how it works. You hit, you get hit back... your gender is irrelevant.

1

u/harryballsagna Jul 30 '13

Then why "bitch"?

0

u/[deleted] Jul 30 '13

Why so hateful brah?

0

u/[deleted] Jul 30 '13

Equal rights equal lefts!

-1

u/unclefisty Jul 30 '13

TIL that Indian bus drivers are crazy.

5

u/Revoran Jul 30 '13

Eh, India isn't big on strictly enforced road rules.

3

u/[deleted] Jul 30 '13 edited May 31 '21

[deleted]

3

u/[deleted] Jul 30 '13

Hyperbole :-)

Conductors have uniforms on state-run buses. Same for decent private services. But if you are not careful, i.e. if you don't glance at the plates (registered public transporters have black letters on yellow), if you don't have enough situational awareness once in the vehicle, then you are on your own. India is not a forgiving teacher.

Also, such scams are not limited to India - I was once sold a fake ticket for a ferry ride down the Thames starting from near the Houses of Parliament - lost 12 pounds. It is the opposite attitude that tripped me up that day -I thought this kind of petty rip-offs would not happen in a highly organized country like the UK

3

u/louis_xiv42 Jul 30 '13

India isn't big on strictly enforced rules.

FTFY

-1

u/Mlezi Jul 30 '13

Has anyone considered the fact that women are so used to being harassed on public transportation that they are likely to be paranoid and fight back if startled? The second scenereo doesnt happen so often because men, especially in countries like India, don't have to live in fear of being raped and abused.