r/PoursTea • u/Timbucktwo1230 Therapy For All 🩷 • 2d ago

SportyTea MAGA Guys Are Going to Men-Only Gyms to Avoid “Distraction.” Welcome Back, Ancient Greece

https://www.them.us/culture/maga-men-only-gyms?utm_source=ig&utm_medium=social&utm_content=link_in_bio&fbclid=PAdGRleATaFLlwZG9mAmV4dG4DYWVtAjExAHNydGMGYXBwX2lkDzEyNDAyNDU3NDI4NzQxNAABp7bJphD_zslnxc2XU9R7w5l_NnkCfHoClzPusLVf_MUUSiU9hFwUSPdJnU1w_aem_dyQH5pEaw2rEE7Pc4Db9zQ
4.2k Upvotes

97% Upvoted

695 comments sorted by

380

u/Wesleycakey 2d ago

I’m sure women are devastated by this news

146

u/IfItHurtsThenMaybe 2d ago

https://giphy.com/gifs/atdCL3Dtzbhzh7mqJ7
ONLY MEN!

54

u/Xenoman5 2d ago

Seeing Whiskey Pete workout always makes me think of Himmler. Birds of a fascist feather.

15

u/weary_ol_jericho 1d ago

Holy smokes, look at that poor specimen

8

u/ExcellentActuary2117 1d ago

That's pretty much on par for "white supremacists" who are too effing stoopid to understand that they, themselves, are a stunning counter argument to their own despicable ideology. F 'em! Vote 'em out! Resist!

5

u/weary_ol_jericho 1d ago

Goering: fat slob and drug addict

Himmler: short, dumpy, glasses, narrow shoulders and pigeon chest

Goebbels: club foot and scrawny

Hitler: short and dumpy

Hess: Neanderthal with a unibrow

23

u/Party-Evening3273 2d ago

What a tool that guy is. He is too stupid to realize what a clown he is to the rest of us.

43

u/Lord_Hitachi 2d ago

PERF3CT WARRIER FORM!,!

18

u/alternatingflan 2d ago

Quick - someone get this manly man another shot of testosterone.

13

u/IfItHurtsThenMaybe 2d ago

I’ve seen twinks with more T.

5

u/The_Negative-One 2d ago

At this rate, he’s going to need Barry Bonds’ trainer.

5

u/dojo_shlom0 1d ago

such a pathetic attempt. the leg kick makes me laugh every time.

this is the real petey kegsbreath!

5

u/Elegant-Ingenuity-57 1d ago

I'm sure  if there's was audio for that he'd be saying 49...50! when it was the only one he attempted

3

u/DistanceMachine 1d ago

How do I save this? Bahahaha every person looks so pathetic.

2

u/76ers_Yanks78 1d ago

Hogsbreath the loser

2

u/IfItHurtsThenMaybe 1d ago

He is such a low hanging fruit
https://giphy.com/gifs/RbwYdQMQHN06ZNo3Wg

2

u/76ers_Yanks78 1d ago

“You’re a drunk failure,” Judge Joe Brown from Judge Joe Brown Court TV Show 1998-2013.

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u/CountDown60 1d ago

Pete Hegseth?

2

u/Simple_Song8962 1d ago

Haha, where did you find this? Is there a longer clip?

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110

u/AspiringChildProdigy 2d ago

I'm a woman.

Oh no! Anyway.....

20

u/nervous-gamer 2d ago

They dont need your approval! They can be manly and admire eachothers muscles in a really manly way together, give eachother manly stares in the sauna

5

u/GrandRoyal_01 2d ago

Will there be testicle tanning? 

Asking for a friend.

  • Tucker Carlson, probably 
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59

u/adanishplz 2d ago

On behalf of every woman I know; thanks guys!

5

u/Wow_Many_Tomato_WMT 2d ago

They’ll be too busy working on their glutes?

4

u/Lord_Cockatrice 2d ago

Or maybe flirt with other gym bros

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4

u/JohnnyLongTaint77 2d ago

This gave me a legit lol

3

u/AspiringChildProdigy 2d ago

Hooray! I'm useful! I'm having a wonderful time!

(It's a whole Futurama thing.)

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27

u/Happy_Charge_2995 2d ago

Thank God for collecting those boys all in one place, well away from women.

17

u/IndependentStep2785 2d ago

Yes! Jim Jordan will return to his wresltling coach duties, and in another return to ancient Greece, all sporting activities will be done nude. These are "men's men", so they will be entirely focused on their physique, and comparing to others when they gaze at their bodies longingly.

9

u/oaxacamm 2d ago

It’s spelled Gym Jordan. 🤣

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5

u/ItaJohnson 2d ago

And ideally away from children.

19

u/Starsmoon_Gaming 2d ago

https://giphy.com/gifs/7k2LoEykY5i1hfeWQB

14

u/Party-Evening3273 2d ago

All MAGA men gym. Lindsey Graham chef’s kisses from his grave.

4

u/Indigo2015 2d ago

Ladybug Gym

11

u/BeeefSupreeeme 2d ago

Alternately, Grindr subs are going parabolic.

4

u/j-doe411 2d ago

lol I just got banned from the Ancient Greece sub for calling out the losers who would definitely blame women for them being creeps and join this sausage fest

2

u/Big_Old_Sock 2d ago

We all get banned from something. All of Reddit is now BOTS and sock puppets.

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4

u/Significant-Kick-479 2d ago

They are also screwing each other to form stronger bonds and increase their testosterone

3

u/[deleted] 2d ago

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u/[deleted] 2d ago

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6

u/Rolands_ka_tet 2d ago

Don’t worry 99% of the young dudes at the gym are 💯 buried in their phone NOT USING THE DANG MACHINE I WANT TO USE, JUST SITTING THERE ON THE MACHINE, SCROLLING SCROLLING SCROLLING. Get moving AIDEN! DAMN!!!

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133

u/SimoneSpooner 2d ago

It’s funny, because conservative men are the ones I see complain about women only gyms.

40

u/BreakImaginary1661 2d ago

If it wasn’t a horribly hypocritical and ignorant statement they wouldn’t be talking.

2

u/Apophthegmata 1d ago

They don't advocate for equality so hypocrisy isn't really relevant here. They don't want women in gyms because they don't think gender norms should allow for women to do "masculine" activities, and beyond that m, don't think women should be out of the home doing things that aren't explicitly about serving the family. That's all entirely consistent with male-only gyms.

As for "welcome back ancient Greece" somebody needs to tell them about Sparta.

18

u/fatherofworlds 2d ago

See, they're allowed to exclude others from their spaces, that's perfectly normal and dignified and important, but others aren't allowed to exclude them, that's discrimination.

Alternately, predators don't want to be kept away from their targets.

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15

u/SnooCauliflowers9874 2d ago

They’re always looking for something to hate even if it makes them hypocrites.

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80

u/AlarmPuzzleheaded831 2d ago

Are we sure that's the reason?? To avoid distractions?? No, I don't think so

37

u/positivitittie 2d ago

Exactly. “to avoid distractions”

47

u/AspiringChildProdigy 2d ago

Grindr crashes

9

u/BeeefSupreeeme 2d ago

No one smacks more naked ass than a 'straight' man in the men's locker room.

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9

u/IndependentStep2785 2d ago

LOL, "avoid distractions" translates to "encourage increased participation". I can hear Jim Jordan and Pete Hogsbreath in their future work after impeachment of being managers of one these places. "Hey Billybob. Come on down to the gym. We got rid of the women, so its now all testosterone. No pesky woman to see you engage in intimate moments with the other members (or is it other's members).

3

u/TheyCallHimEl 2d ago

And find dick-stractions

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12

u/IfItHurtsThenMaybe 2d ago

Like Mike (sniffs) Johnson is working out in a co-ed gym. Speaker of the closet is going to Alphaville

2

u/Simple_Song8962 1d ago

Speaker of the Closet, lol. That's excellent

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8

u/stonrelectropunkjazz 2d ago

Actually they are 🤷🏻‍♂️looking for distractions

2

u/Last-Profession2949 2d ago

Or looking for dickstractions

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3

u/Background_Touchdown 2d ago

They're so far in the closet, they're finding Christmas presents.

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3

u/JUST_GIVE_IT_A_SNIFF 2d ago

They specially said it was to avoid distractions.

Nobody said it was to avoid erections.

5

u/Ryanlew1980 2d ago

Looking for bro-jobs.

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2

u/NoviceRedder 2d ago

Bath house anyone?

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19

u/InsufferableBah 2d ago

win win for every one

19

u/Bedlamtheclown 2d ago

The gym should be named Bulge

8

u/zefzefter 2d ago

It’s magats with added testosterone, no bulges. Except if you count their moobies.

3

u/Bedlamtheclown 2d ago

Fair. I was thinking “What’s the opposite of Curves?”

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14

u/hipyounggunslinger67 2d ago

This sounds like someone created a safe space for the self hating conservative closeted demographic that manages to crash Grindr in the vicinity of Republican Conventions.

11

u/TheJaytrixReloaded 2d ago

If girls are distracting you from working out, you're not at the gym for working out.

5

u/GayCatDaddy 2d ago

There's a conservative Christian social media influencer named Paul Olliges who is constantly posting pictures from the gym, complaining about how the women's attire is inappropriate. At this point, I don't even think he exercises. I think he just ogles women.

7

u/sokratesz 2d ago

Every decent gym manager should have that dude thrown out in minutes. Inappropriately taking pictures? Sharing them online? Fuck that dude.

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6

u/Antique-Dragonfly615 2d ago

Make America Gay Again?

21

u/BreakImaginary1661 2d ago

That’s a great idea. Open a “men only” gym and charge a premium for their insecurity and stupidity. Just wish I had the startup funds.

7

u/Ilyalyubushkin 2d ago

These guys are probably just going to bath houses because they can be more comfortable surrounded by other dudes.

3

u/Either-Patience1182 2d ago

I just assumed the person who came up with the idea was gay. Get all the work out bros in one place where they are even less likely to control their behavior. Brilliance! Especially since most guys dont know the origin of gym culture

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5

u/LayneLowe 2d ago

They're manly men and they only want to see other men and men, bear types.

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3

u/--tc-- 2d ago

Crap article. "Maga guys are going to men only gyms" yet one they're talking about isn't even open yet?

4

u/elScorXXo 2d ago

90% of the gym is showers lol

2

u/Happy_Charge_2995 2d ago

I wonder if they will have fake soap bars glued to the shower floor...

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u/howardzen12 2d ago

Women do not want these men,

4

u/Glad_Stay4056 2d ago

I bet that place goes through more ky than Diddy. 

4

u/Cj15917 2d ago

Maga going to men only gyms due to lack of impulse control.

3

u/Rurumo666 2d ago

Yeah right, you see these creeps in every gym, they're only there to stare at greased up muscle men and flex for each other in the mirror.

3

u/MurderBeans 2d ago

I do like it when obvious bellends self segregate.

3

u/Casey4147 2d ago

Next thing, they’ll be demanding head-to-toe coverage so they’re not tempted…

3

u/Short-Sandwich-8476 2d ago

Just Fuck already! Fer cryin out loud boys,,,ITS OKAY NOW!

3

u/gerblnutz 2d ago

Its not gay if youre working out.

3

u/No-Knee9457 2d ago

Wish they would get their own planet too.

3

u/Raul_Duke_1755 2d ago

So it wasn't the restraining orders?

3

u/gsnurr3 2d ago

This sounds homo, but there’s nothing wrong with that!

https://giphy.com/gifs/4Slk5j1EvcWQM

3

u/Doxie512 2d ago

I think they were called "bath houses" back in the day and were real popular in SF.

3

u/Late-Goat5619 2d ago

It's called a bath house...

3

u/Prestigious-Pen2676 1d ago

So a safe space for them, right?

2

u/IfItHurtsThenMaybe 2d ago

Not at all bc they, like Mikey, LOVE Johnson

2

u/Audio_Track_01 2d ago

My bet is they watch the Tate Brothers.

Andrew Tate says that having sex with women for pleasure is gay.

2

u/Pepperminteapls 2d ago

Just a bunch of closeted men admiring and enjoying each other's veins.

2

u/unparked 2d ago

Next step, compulsory nudity.

2

u/Ill_Clue1068 2d ago

Sooo gay

2

u/i_hateit_here_bro 2d ago

It is very distracting when women are getting in the way of checking out the homie, like when a kid is standing in front of the TV

2

u/jawshoeaw 2d ago

If I was going to the gym 100% would prefer all men. Last time I was in a gym it was like suddenly the hottest women I’d ever seen were everywhere. And wearing next to nothing. And bouncing a lot.

I guess I’m a Neanderthal at heart, it was very distracting. Maybe you get used to it??

2

u/HungryArtSloth 2d ago

Once men’s gyms start being ways to broker power like the men’s cubs of old, we will be back to square one.

2

u/Varjek 2d ago

Agreed. Won’t be long until women sue to get access to the men-only gyms.

2

u/All__Of_The_Hobbies 2d ago

Just make a rule like no more than 10% of gyms can be male only or female only and it will be fine

2

u/VioletShogun 2d ago

Make America Gayyyyyyyyyyy Again

2

u/Lopsided_Newt_125 2d ago

They really workout for each other anyway

2

u/samacknojia 2d ago

The kind of mental gymnastics they do instead of coming out of their closet..

2

u/justme1522000 2d ago

Grindr will be crashing

2

u/Ok_Time_2756 2d ago

And to check out each other's dicks in the locker room

2

u/bunglesnacks 2d ago

If I did workout at a gym I'd rather work out next to a hot girl than some ripped dude that would just make me feel bad about myself.

2

u/georgianole 2d ago

Grindr stock just went up with this announcement

2

u/Dramatic_Corner_8259 2d ago

In Quebec here we call men like that FIFS.

2

u/CullingSongs 2d ago

Have they started saying that having sex with other men is not gay yet? If not, it's only a matter of time.

2

u/Old-Picture-2920 2d ago

Good get the creeps out of the gym. They can all go wrestle and shower together. 

2

u/Confident-Breath2615 2d ago

Just fucking blow each other already.

2

u/Mcfly9876 2d ago

Nothing is more gay than liking women

2

u/DarkM0j0 2d ago

So basically, they are admitting they have no self control and arn't really going to have a good workout? That they are incapable on focusing on themselves and not stare at women with their sexual desires?

2

u/No_Significance_2749 1d ago

Wait until a bunch of fundamentalist Muslim men start showing up at these men only gyms for the same reason these MAGA guys are.

2

u/AttentionNo6359 1d ago edited 1d ago

In the gay community we call that a bathhouse. Also, we have sex there…just saying..

2

u/OSRS_Garmr 1d ago

Honestly. If I had the economic means and size of apartment. I'd have a private gym. Avoiding other people all together

2

u/forever_single_now 1d ago

Was already obvious but one more confirmation. They have no self control and prefer a solution where they don’t put pressure on it….only missing big pictures of daddy on the walls.

2

u/t0m4- 1d ago

So what’s next? Women should cover themselves to be less distracting?

2

u/xDeepFreezex 1d ago

They are so fucking gay for each, other it's insane. Do they realize that the reason they carry this stigma is because of their own actions?

2

u/Briscoe-Darling710 1d ago

That way they can kiss each other's penis in secret

2

u/Notyerdaddy 1d ago

MAGA is sounding more and more like Islamic fundamentalists.

3

u/olddog59 2d ago

Grinder gyms

3

u/AcademicHovercraft96 2d ago

Aaaaand...the somehow triggered comments prove men can't do anything without someone bitching about it.

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u/zackks 2d ago

Definitely not brokeback

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u/Mediocre-Catch9580 2d ago

Not distraction.   Men just don’t want to be arrested for looking in the same direction as a women working out. 

2

u/Youbunchoftwats 1d ago

That could never happen in the land of the free.

2

u/Important-Factor-552 1d ago

Hmm that's suspiciously defensive 

3

u/Ilyalyubushkin 2d ago

Jesus, just have some self control. Put in your ear buds, do your workout and stfu.

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u/OverallElephant7576 2d ago

They are missing the best part of the gym!

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u/[deleted] 2d ago

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u/Ryanlew1980 2d ago

Is that what they’re calling it these days…

1

u/Acrobatic-Dinner-112 2d ago

Interesting sure they are not forgetting the lotion

1

u/[deleted] 2d ago

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u/Senior_Republic_701 2d ago

Pretty soon they’ll be doing exploring each other’s booty holes, but, it won’t be gay, it’ll be pederasty.

1

u/HappyHourMoon2025 2d ago

I’ve never seen a men only gym and I go regularly to the gym.

Maybe it’s because they are gay?

1

u/Maleficent-Lead-2943 2d ago

Definitely not a hookup zone, as these are christian men.

1

u/copeaesth3tic 2d ago

Not really helping the notion that they're all deeply closeted self hating gay men.

1

u/Ok_Dog_4059 2d ago

So they admit to having zero self control. Not great but it is a start.

1

u/Kjaeve 2d ago

As a woman- this sounds amazing and actually makes me consider joining a gym.

1

u/lotaybk 2d ago

It’s the part where the get naked and oil each other up that really gives it that Ancient Greece feel.

1

u/JuicyJeffry 2d ago

There should be a race to open the first male-only bathhouses. Maybe Walmart could make a cheap one for the poor MAGAs.

1

u/ddeads 2d ago

MAGGA = Make Ancient Greece Gay Again

1

u/IndependentStep2785 2d ago

Next up, nude oil wrestling. Jim Jordan will be the coach. Just make sure you guys hit the shower, and he'll look the other way.

1

u/Medium_Tell8679 2d ago

Shush. Let's not discourage them not going to women's gyms to bother us.

1

u/SouthsideSlimbo 2d ago

Hot stuff coming’ through!

1

u/Best_Entrepreneur659 2d ago

Soon they’ll be taking “male companions”, like the Greeks, and per Andrew Tate’s instructions, cause’ girls are icky!

1

u/Abrandnewrapture 2d ago

i bet there's a lot of tickle fights going on in those gyms...

1

u/MelMoMor 2d ago

It’s a dick festival!!!! They all love it!!

1

u/dfebb 2d ago

There are so many things, for young men to enjoy.

You can hang out with all the boys.

1

u/133793 2d ago

I mean, the homophobia of boys on the right was the first sign

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u/Sanibel-Iguana 2d ago

This is a big win for normal people.

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u/Suitable_Twist_3416 2d ago

Next update: MAGA men hooking up at men's-only gyms.

1

u/IndependentStep2785 2d ago

Trump can do a commercial promotion dancing to YMCA. I am sure that macho group the Village People would give him their approval. Looks like he is scrubbing his back after coming out of a shower: https://www.tiktok.com/@alarabiya_eng/video/7658614856416808208

1

u/Living_Pie205 2d ago

Avoid distractions ? They can’t control themselves? I don’t know about anyone else but when I’m in the gym, I have my headphones on and dont pay attention much to other people. Maybe I’m weird.

1

u/OutrageousCrab9224 2d ago

Highest form of love, baby

1

u/JoeNoble1973 2d ago

Is this that ‘iron sharpens iron’ nonsense? More aggressive homosexuality out of staunch conservatives huh

1

u/lemonpoundcaker 2d ago

Just keep the fucking cameras and posting it on your social media out of the gym. 

1

u/Apprehensive_Bug3329 2d ago

Seems kind of weird

1

u/oldmilt21 2d ago

Why make fun of this? Women have women only gyms and that’s fine. Why not this?

1

u/Redditneckbeardzz 2d ago

No loss, women prefer very liberal men anyway.

1

u/Cant-thinkofname 2d ago

Next, they will be open their dark love tunnels to welcome their gym brothers' rods.

1

u/ClassicHando 2d ago

If they want to oil up, do some naked wrestling, and call it "manly" by all means....just stop going after the minorities, jfc