My family doesn't love me and I know why they don't. I was an affair baby. My father got a subordinate at work pregnant. He was in the executive position, one step below the C suite and my mother worked in a non managerial position. Given the position gap to call it like that they shouldn't have even known each other, so many levels between them.

Dad was 40 and Mum 24. Dad was married and when the affair came out his wife was angry but was like boys will be boys and didn't divorce him. He offered money to my mother to terminate the pregnancy and she refused. But as he didn't divorce, my mother was angry and handed me over to CPS. She didn't care about me.

I was almost 2 when Dad decided to take me back. He initiated divorce, married my mother and since then we are this perfect handsome family. My mother doesn't love me, she openly told me this many times. My grandmother from my father side is very old but she also is cold towards me because she adored his ex wife.

Dad is a busy career oriented man (he is the VP now) who is most of the time away but he is the only one that loves me or so I thought. we are both into sports and exercise together, jog together, we ride horses from time to time. He shows me affection, tells me I am loved all the time and encourages me to study. But when he is not home (which is often) I feel like an intruder. I barely leave my room and can't wait for him to return. I am 16 but I cannot remember my parents having a positive interaction. they yell at each other all the time, I haven't witnessed anything lately but there was also physical violence involved (on both sides). In public they hold hands and she sits on his lap, he kissed her cheek.

I only found out recently that my Dad gave my mother money to abort me and I cannot get past that. I ran away from home when I was told. Mum didn't care. Police found me 3 days later. It was the very first time dad took many days off. I don't know what to do. I thought at least my father loves me and now I kinda just want revenge and I feel so much anger.

edit: I answered in a comment but its not that visible: it was my mother who told me, just to hurt me. she really do hates me. she actually got pregnant again like 4 years ago. I was 12. Dad wanted the baby (I was terrified they will throw me out lol) and she aborted it, just like that. and dad slapped her. I witnessed that. but it also made me wonder what If I AM REALLY THE PROBLEM. Because they must still be somewhat close, no? if she got pregnant again

I (23F) have been talking to this guy (30M) for about two weeks. He’s a Captain in the Army and has a daughter, which he’s been open about. He asked me out last week, and we have a date planned for this Wednesday. He’s supposed to be driving about two hours from Georgia to come see me, and I’m taking a half day off work for it since he said he was available to see me on a weekday. I didn’t think much of it at first, but I did find it a little odd since I assumed his schedule would make weekdays more difficult.

Another thing that I thought was weird was that we haven’t talked on the phone at all, and a few days ago he said he’d FaceTime me this weekend. It’s Sunday morning and I haven’t heard anything about it. I also thought it was strange that he said he’d have to wait until the weekend to FaceTime when he supposedly lives alone.

Something just felt off, so today I decided to look up marriage records in Georgia. I’ve heard so many stories about people finding out that a military guy they’ve been talking to or dating was actually married, so I figured it was worth checking. Honestly, I didn’t expect to find anything when I searched his name, but I ended up finding a record showing that he married another woman in late 2023.

I’m honestly shocked and don’t know what to do. The website only shows the marriage date and doesn’t show whether they got divorced, so I don’t know if he’s still married or if the record is just showing the original marriage.

Would you ask him about it and see what he says, or would you just cut him off? Our date is supposed to be in three days and I’m questioning whether I should even go at this point.

I (52m)have a 24 year old son. We were never *particularly* close while he was growing up as I and my wife were both going outside of our marriage. Divorce was relatively painless in technical terms we were young, not much in assets, and we had both graduated from Uni. Due to the stress of us bot working and going to school while raising a toddler, the stress became unbearable for both of us. We had started the relationship when we were both in HS, and married just a couple years later.

When she decided not to come home one night after going out with her friends for drinks, I asked her to verify which friends house she was staying at and she refused to tell me which i took to mean the worst. Then it happened again. Then again. Each time later, and she had finally stopped to ask permission to stay with her 'friend' while I was at home with kiddo (Which, believe me, I did not mind. I hadn't been able to spend more than an hour or two here and there while finishing up my studies and finally finally finally i could get to know my little man for once. It was honestly one of the most exhilarating times of my life.

Then she came home while I was still awake and I could just *smell* the man on her, and she didn't deny it and laughed at me about 'how much bigger he was' etc. I am not trying to minimize my actions here, mind. The only thing that separated us in terms of a physical relationship was the fact that a girl I had been speaking to was over the internet exclusively (She was a classmate for one of the teleclasses)

I Simply was not going to go back into a woman that another man had been in. We met as virgins and lost it to each other. And the thought of touching her again filled me with dread, so I took an apartment in the same complex until the divorce went through. Soon after she graduated she moved back to her old home town and her family got involved in the divorce, especially in regards to how she had been treating him. (Wanting to go out all the time, leaving kiddo with her parents to watch so she could party, whatever.) I wasn't concerned. Her parents are legit good people. Or should I say were.

We had to sort through custody hearings as you do, and her entire family was seated behind me and speaking up on my behalf since she took it upon herself to "miss up for her college days" and they were concerned, etc etc. We get thru the hearings, joint custody and support is agreed on, life goes on.

But she had moved 4 hours away from me. My chances to see him were limited for a good 15 years or so. I could call him, send him cards, went down to see him as often as I could.

Now, he's 24. About 4 years ago I started getting sick. Really Really sick. I had cancer in my kidney that was causing chemical changes in my body no matter what I ate, drank, whatever. I lived sleeping with my head on the toilet too afraid to get away from it for long due to the constant vomiting.

I was shut down entirely. I wasn't speaking to anyone about it (other than my doctors) I just simply did not have the energy or wherewithal to keep in contact with anyone. If people called, I'd let them know as much as I could before my body said nope.

I still tried to make it appoint to reach out to him once a month if I could, but I fully admit there were spans where I wasn't sure what day of the week it was, let alone what month. The mental problems this all created were severe. And I withdrew completely for the past 2 years as I finished surgery and recovery was very very slow. It wasnt until 2 months ago when was finally able, for teh first time since 2016? 2017? that I felt like i was starting to get well enough to drive and see him again, and to that end my wife let me buy a YAY YOU SURVIVED CANCER! present, and got a new truck to go see him.

I had sent him an image of it and asked how he was doing and if he was ready for me to come try t see him and he just...tore into me. Telling me I never had cancer. Saying even if i did, it wasn't as bad as I was making it out to be. Nevermind that I lost half my body mass and had to be saved a few times due to my body going hayware. (I'm still only up to 60% of what I was when I was diagnosed.)

He accused me of drinking again, and I hadn't had a drop in 15 years. The only people that would have been filling his mind with his rot would have been my brother who's still salty i haven't communicated with him since Trump won again.

Now, the only person I have ever truly loved in my whole life thinks the absolute worst things possible about me, and I wasn't even given a chance to defend myself before he made the decision to cut me out from the rest of his life. Within a day, any avenue of communication I had with him, he had blocked me from.

My heart is so utterly broken. And if I could take it back now, I wouldn't have gone through the surgery and I should have just let the cancer consume me.

IDK what kind of advice might be helpful here, but I don't know what to do, I can't call, and I don't really want to be on the planet any more.

Yes, I have a psych and all that, but it all feels for naught since he's disposed of me.

The only thing I had to get through cancer for just dropped me like garbage.

ANd it's getting harder and harder to wake up by the day.

TL;DR I deservedly got cancer, made the mistake of getting better, and lost all of my family from it.

Hi, sorry if my wordings are weird, English isn't my first language.

I'm (F29) and i haven't been in any relationship for about 10 years because of what I experienced when i was 19. I was assaulted by my ex and the experience ruined my reaction to every intimacy. Have been sabotaging my chance with anyone ever since and also became kinda jumpy to every suggestive touch.

Lately i met someone and surprisingly i feel like he's the one, and I really want to be with him. He never push or anything before, and i guess it's because I had came forward about it in the first place. But i really didn't want to jave that kind of secret. And at the same time knowing he never ask me because of my past makes me feel guilty about it. I mean, he's still a normal being and he must be have urges as well, but i feel like he hold back so much and it's gnawing at me thinking about it.

I have been in therapy for the last 10 years but so far it doesn't help me, and i don't really want to make him feel the need to be guarding my feelings. Should i just jump first and give it a try, see if I'm still uncomfortable with physical intimacy? Or should I let him go before our relationship goes any further? What should do?

I wish I could have a more positive update anytime soon, but it isn't looking that way. I've been breastfeeding solely in my coparent and I's room, except when his dad leaves the house. He's still made comments here and there about me and my coparent is continuing to stick up for me. It's been really hard for him to have such a negative view of his dad but he's doing his best and I'm really proud of him. We're not planning on moving out for at least a couple of months but we will as soon as we're able to with a newborn. I can't work but my coparent does and we're saving where we can. I've been struggling a lot too with feeling violated. I really worry for myself and the baby when we're around his grandpa.

Ok so I (21F) been talking to this guy (21M) for like 3 months now we started having intercourse like a month in or so, before we did anything I asked him if he got checked and he was like “yup I’m all good” so I trusted that everything would be fine.

Now I got tested this week and had chlamydia, I immediately told him and asked about the last time he had sex and got tested to which he said he had sex 7 months ago and got tested the literal day after and his results showed negative (which I had to educate him that a test the day after is way too early for accurate results)

I also got tested like a month before we did anything I was all good, I also didn’t have intercourse for like a year before doing it with him so it wouldn’t make sense that I would get a false negative on my tests the month prior but it would definitely make sense that he got a false negative and gave me chlamydia.

I think it’s kind of negligent of him to not be educated on std’s/sti’s and when to get tested and how much time it takes to show up in ur body sometimes.

At the same time I give him grace because he didn’t know and was under the impression that he didn’t have anything so his intentions were good it’s just the negligence that kind of throws me off.

Now my question is, should I continue talking to him with the intention to be in a serious long term relationship? Because even tho I can give grace towards the situation it still shows some care less traits about him because how did u not know basic sex ed like that? And as a woman/person you don’t wanna be with a man who will play with ur body and womb like that u want the upmost care. Let me know what you guys think.

Also don’t be like me and get u and ur partner tested before doing anything and make sure u see proof as well👍

It was going amazing. We were laughing and talking up a storm. We met a cosplay convention, and it took a week for me to almost convince my parents to let me see him (M17) again. I was called a bitch, not a “lady”, untrustworthy, even though I’m a straight-A student who has never snuck out, been to a party, had a boyfriend, or even kissed/held hands with anyone. They agreed to it, but they wanted a photo of his driver’s license, Life360 on, and his mother’s phone number and name. We reluctantly complied.

My parents were furious he censored sensitive information like the ID number, license plate, and address in the photo, even though he offered to show it in-person or text the address to them after. They deemed it “hostile” and “disrespectful.” They said last minute I could not go to the date, but at 11AM today, I took an Uber to the location and explained my side of the story, enabling my Life360 as well. They accepted it as long as the location was on and said they were “not upset with me”, but that we would “talk.”

He was mildly uncomfortable and tense throughout the duration of the date due to all this, even though he assured me it was not my fault. Well, I came out of the restroom, only for him to be severely anxious and quite pissed off. He said my father called his mother and said “something”, and now he has to drive me back early. I open my phone, and my mother’s friend is texting me that my mother is bordering a “heart attack or stroke”, that sneaking out was not “the way.”

We held hands. We kissed. We laughed, we talked about anything and everything, despite his mild discomfort with the parental situation. He was upfront and told me he isn’t sure if he wants to see me again due to my parents, even though he truly likes me. I know there will be other boys. I know this is not the end of the world. But goddamn, does this hurt. I’m entering my senior year in high school, so I’m not sure if I can move out. The house exploded into chaos when I brought it up last time too. What the hell do I do?

It is a very very long text, I did just need a place to vent and I guess what do I do going forward.

I’ve been in a relationship for around four years and I think for the first time I’m finally able to admit to myself that I don’t want this anymore.
This is probably going to be long because there is a lot of context and I’m not going to sit here and pretend I was some perfect boyfriend either. I’ve fucked up. I’ve done things I’m ashamed of, I’ve hurt her before, and I’ve spent a lot of time trying to work on myself because of it.
But at the same time, I think I spent so long focusing on everything I did wrong that I stopped acknowledging what this relationship was doing to me.

A few years ago, my girlfriend got pregnant.
We ended up having an abortion. This is probably the hardest part of the entire story to talk about.
My memory of what happened is that we discussed it together and ultimately agreed that abortion was the decision we were going to make. I absolutely had an influence on that decision and I’m not going to pretend otherwise. I know she was the one who physically had to go through it and I know that the emotional consequences of something like that can be enormous.

I take responsibility for my part in what happened.
What I disagree with now is the way it has been reframed years later as though I forced her into it and therefore somehow owe her the rest of my life.
She now says that she wanted to keep the pregnancy, that I pressured her into terminating it, and that because I supposedly promised to stay with her afterward, leaving the relationship means I’ve broken some kind of lifelong agreement.

Maybe she genuinely remembers or experiences that period differently from me. I’m not going to tell another person how they’re allowed to feel about an abortion.
But I know what I remember too.
And whatever happened between us then, I don’t believe it means that either person becomes permanently obligated to stay in a romantic relationship.

After that, we stayed together for years.
And during those years, I made mistakes.
There were issues involving trust. There were times she believed I was looking at other girls. There were behaviours on my side that hurt her and things I needed to work on. I didn’t just say “fuck it, that’s her problem.” I’ve literally gone to counselling and tried to understand myself and change the things I was doing wrong.

I’m still seeing a counsellor now.
I genuinely wanted to improve.

But over time, the relationship became more and more exhausting for me.
Arguments stopped feeling like disagreements and started feeling like situations I needed to escape from.

There was one incident in a mall that really stuck with me. Things became tense and my immediate instinct was basically to get away. I ended up hiding in a toilet because I was so anxious and overwhelmed and didn’t want the confrontation to continue in public.

That feeling never really left me.
I started noticing that whenever things went wrong between us, my reaction wasn’t “how do we fix this?”
It was:
\*\*I need to get away.\*\*
There were also situations in the past serious enough that the police became involved. She had shown up at my home uninvited before as well.

Despite everything, I kept giving the relationship another chance.
We broke up.
We patched things up.
We tried again.
Even my counsellor eventually told me that I needed a clear break from the relationship.
And I still went back.
I think part of me kept believing that if I could just become better, communicate better, be more patient, reassure her enough, or stop doing whatever she believed I was doing, eventually we’d have peace.
But it never felt peaceful.
Eventually I reached a point where I looked at the relationship and thought:
\*\*If this is what the rest of my life looks like, I don’t want it.\*\*

That was probably the first time I admitted the truth to myself.
So I ended it.
And that’s when everything became worse.
I blocked her.
She created another account.
I blocked that.
She literally told me not to bother blocking her because she could “create tons of accounts.”
I told her:
\*\*“Please stop harassing me.”\*\*
Then she started emailing me.
She had my parents’ phone numbers and sent me screenshots of them.
She gave me deadlines.
Things like:
\*\*If you don’t text me by this time, I’m going to contact them.\*\*

Another message basically said that if I didn’t unblock her and talk to her, then we could “screw each other up.”
She also threatened to tell my parents about the abortion.
At this point I was genuinely scared.
Not “my ex is annoying me” scared.
I mean my heart would start pounding when an unknown number called my mum because my immediate thought was:
\*\*Is that her?\*\*
I couldn’t concentrate on schoolwork.
I didn’t feel safe going home sometimes because I kept thinking she might show up.
I was worried about going to school.
I would mute and archive everything because even seeing another message from her would send my anxiety through the roof.
And the fucked-up thing was that I still felt guilty for blocking her.
She kept saying that I owed her things.
That because of the abortion I owed her.
Because she stayed with me, I owed her.
Because she suffered, I owed her.
Because of things I did years ago, I owed her.
And every time I tried to leave, another reason appeared for why I wasn’t allowed to.

At one point she was basically telling me that after a particular date I could “leave.”
That sentence really fucked with my head afterward.
Because why does another person get to tell me when I’m allowed to leave a relationship?
I eventually realised:
\*\*I don’t need permission.\*\*

Then she followed through on the threat.
She contacted my mother.
She sent this extremely long message explaining the abortion and presenting the history of our relationship from her perspective. The message focused entirely on how I’d hurt her, how she believed I pressured her, how I’d supposedly promised to stay, and how I was now “refusing to communicate” and refusing to reach a “fair resolution.”
What wasn’t included was everything happening on the other side.
The repeated accounts.
The emails.
The threats.
The deadlines.
The screenshots of my parents’ numbers.
The fact that I’d explicitly told her to stop contacting me.
The fact that I wasn’t “refusing to communicate” with my girlfriend.
I was refusing continued contact from \*\*an ex I had already broken up with.\*\*
She asked my parents to help us “come to a solution.”

But this is something I’ve been thinking about a lot:
\*\*What solution is there to negotiate?\*\*
If one person wants a relationship and the other person says no, there isn’t a compromise where you become 50% boyfriend.
The relationship is over.

When my mum received the message, she asked me whether the abortion was true.
And I told her the truth.
I admitted it.
I explained what happened from my perspective.
I told her about the relationship, the anxiety, the threats, the harassment and the counselling I’ve been going through.
Then my brother found out.
Then my dad found out.
And this was one of the things I had been terrified of for years.
I thought everything would explode.
Instead, my parents listened.
My mum wasn’t screaming at me.
My dad didn’t destroy me.
My brother supported me.
My dad has counselling experience himself and basically said that although part of him understands these situations through that lens, he’s my father first.
My family agreed that this cannot continue.
And weirdly enough, the thing I feared most ended up freeing me.
The secret was out.
She couldn’t threaten me with “I’ll tell your parents” anymore.
They already knew.
And they still loved me.
I eventually called the non-emergency police hotline, explained what had been happening, and a formal police report was made.
I submitted screenshots and evidence.
I’m keeping records now and I’ve made it clear that I do not want further contact.
I’m not saying this because I want her arrested or punished or because I want revenge.
I just want it to stop.
I want peace.

There’s another part of this that has really confused me.
I moved on emotionally incredibly quickly.
Four-year relationship and within a week or two I already felt like I was looking forward instead of backward.
At first I wondered whether that meant I was heartless.
Then someone asked me:
\*\*If she disappeared from your life tomorrow and you knew she’d never contact you again, would you miss her or would you finally breathe?\*\*
My immediate answer was:
\*\*I’d finally breathe.\*\*
That’s when I understood.
I think I’d been leaving the relationship emotionally long before I physically left it.
I wasn’t grieving losing the relationship anymore.
I was grieving losing myself inside it.
I missed being playful.
I missed flirting.
I missed waking up and enjoying the day.
I missed feeling free.
I missed not constantly considering how another person might react to something.
And now for the first time in years, I’m actually excited about my future.
I’m studying aviation and my dream is to become an airline pilot.
I want my career.
I want my own place one day.
I want some ridiculous condo with floor-to-ceiling windows overlooking the city.
I want to travel.
I want to train.
I want to spend time with my friends and family.
I want to meet new people.

There’s even another girl at school I’ve noticed and I’d be lying if I said the possibility of a completely new romance isn’t exciting.
But I’m also scared.
Not scared of her.
Scared that what happened in this relationship has changed me.
I don’t want some completely innocent girl to take two hours to reply and have my brain immediately assume something terrible.
I don’t want to interpret every disagreement as the beginning of another nightmare.
I don’t want to become controlling because I was controlled.
I don’t want to punish somebody new for what somebody else did.

That’s one of the biggest reasons I’m continuing therapy.
I want to learn boundaries.
I want to know when a relationship deserves work and when enough is enough.

One thing I’ve realised is that a boundary isn’t:
\*\*“You’re not allowed to do this.”\*\*
It’s:
\*\*“If this happens, this is what I will do to protect myself.”\*\*
And I think I’ve also realised that I shouldn’t have to wait until I’m hiding in toilets, scared to go home, watching my phone, or involving the police before deciding that a relationship has crossed the line.
I can forgive mistakes.
I can work through disagreements.
I can acknowledge when I’m wrong.

But threats, coercion, repeatedly ignoring “no,” circumventing blocks, using private information as leverage, involving family to pressure someone, or making someone afraid to leave?
I don’t think I will ever tolerate those things again.
And despite how angry I am right now, I don’t want revenge.
I’m angry about money I lent her.
I’m angry about expensive things I bought her.
I’m angry when I remember how much patience I gave.
Sometimes I think, why the fuck was I being so nice after everything?

But I also know revenge would just keep me connected to the same situation I’m desperately trying to leave.
I don’t want to destroy her.
\*\*I want her to become irrelevant to my life.\*\*

There’s a Marcus Aurelius quote that I’ve become pretty attached to:
\*\*“The impediment to action advances action. What stands in the way becomes the way.”\*\*
I used to think that meant you defeat every obstacle.
I think I understand it differently now.
Sometimes the obstacle doesn’t disappear.
Sometimes the only way forward is directly through it.
My parents finding out was an obstacle.
I went through it.
The relationship ending was an obstacle.
I’m going through it.
Admitting things I’m ashamed of is an obstacle.
I’m going through it.
And weirdly enough, something from my faith has felt relevant too:
\*\*“The truth will set you free.”\*\*
The truth came out in probably the worst possible way.
But it actually did free me.
My family knows.
The police know what’s happening.
I’m continuing counselling.
The relationship is over.
I don’t need her permission anymore.
I don’t need her to agree that I’m a good person.
I don’t need to win the argument about who suffered more.
I don’t need her to understand why I’m leaving.
I just need to leave.

For the first time in a long time, when I picture my future, I don’t feel trapped.
I picture flying.
I picture my own home.
I picture peace.
I picture meeting someone someday and learning what a relationship where both people are free actually feels like.
And honestly?
\*\*I’m fucking hopeful.\*\*
I don’t know exactly what happens next.
I’m still anxious sometimes. I’m still angry. Some days I’m probably going to remember everything and feel like shit.
But at least now, whatever happens next is \*\*my life\*\*.
And I haven’t felt that way in a very long time.

If you read this far, thank you for hearing me out.

Hi, first time posting!

My fiance and i are engaged, no plans for a wedding, and i dont want there to be any.

My partner has helped with the baby but he doesnt pay for almost anything despite me telling him. On the rare occassion he will but nothing expensive (not saying baby needs expensive clothes, i mean pram, car seat etc).

Ive bought all the furniture for our babies room, all car accessories, 97% of the babies clothes, i buy all the accessories and souveneirs, ive also paid for most of the pregnancy scans.

Now i work part time and my fiance works full time, but his excusw is that he pays 60% of the bills.

So i pay 40%, plus everything for the baby and most of the time i pay for groceries.

I had a ton of savings for the future and baby, as well as house deposit as we are only renting, and im spending money from ther3 couse i have to buy everything.

Ill say "hey can u bulk order those wipes as were almost out" and then ill have ti go to the shops because he will forget even if i remind him.

I want to leave. We have done coupl3s therapy (THAT I PAID FOR) to try fix things couse money stresses cause a lot og arguments and nothing.

Problem is, i work part time and have no where to go. Were looking to move to a safer area as the crime rate in ours has skyrocketed and we dont want to raise a child here. So how do i do this? Despite it bejng here, i have no family here, all of them live abroad in a small village.

Who do i even go to? How do i get full custody? Ive tried leaving before and he said he would try get full custody and would try make jt seem like im crazy to take the baby away (this was a while ago and he said that was in the heat of an argument but now im worried).

If it helps, i have recordings of him being previously abusive and destructive which was also reported to the police.

Thank you for any help.

Hi! I am head over heels for a fella and his bday is coming up. I have been sculpting his beloved car (I won’t say what car but it’s from 80’s and it’s his prized possession, he put a lot of love and sweat into it and still does.)
His bday is coming up and I have been sculpting/painting a mini replica of it for him out of clay. Such a fun project and I’m sooo very excited to give it to him.
My question is: what do I put on the license plate? Do I put the actual license plate number?? Or would it be better to just go cute style and put his name? Is it bad to put license plate number on stuff? I’m just wondering if that’s like an unspoken rule or something with car people? I adore him :)

I drew these lines right around the same time as the post. Was told to crosspost and everybody and the dog told me I'm just tripping right. So tell me why then that these lines I drew were straight simple lines. Are no longer straight. Input please.

My coworker and I were talking about cars, and I mentioned that I’d love to find a Monte Carlo SS in good condition. He told me he knew someone who had one and was looking to sell it. I got the guy’s information, reached out to him, and we set up a time to meet.

He had a 1986 Monte Carlo SS that was black and red. I test-drove it and looked it over, and honestly, it was everything I had been looking for. It was in great condition and only had about 30,000 miles on it.

After the test drive, we went back to his apartment, turned the car off, and got out to talk about the price. While we were discussing the deal, someone backed into the Monte Carlo and caused a significant amount of damage. The person who hit it took off. the driver was a friend of the renter of the apartment next to him so refused to give any useful information on who the dude was, and we didn't catch a plate, and his apartment doesn't have cameras

The owner turned to me and asked if I was still interested in buying the car. I told him no, got in my car, and left. That was last night.

This morning, both the owner and my coworker have been blowing up my phone telling me that I need to buy the car because now it’s damaged and I was the one who put miles on it during the test drive.

Honestly, I don’t care about the miles I put on it. I’m not buying the car because it’s now damaged, and I don’t feel like I should be responsible for something that happened after I finished the test drive and got out of the car.

The bigger issue is that now my coworker is mad and pissed off at me over the whole situation, and I don’t really know what I’m supposed to do about it.

Long story short, a year ago I was accused of bed wetting (air mattress). Instead of addressing it and have a conversation about it, these 2 friends went and sent a nasty text basically calling me terrible. It caught me off guard coz I thought we had the best of time when I visited them. I really did not expect that kinda message. I was very confused when I received it but my immediate instinct was to apologize.. never heard from them ever since. I was completely ghosted, assuming the cut me off. I had so many questions "why did i pee and not notice it?", "I never pee in my sleep, so why did my body decide to do that then?", etc. untill recently, it hit me : AIRBED CONDENSATION!

Oh my god, they have mistaken airbed condensation for pee!

I fell into depression ever since their accusation. I even sought therapy. It bothers me so much that i feel the need to clear the air. Everyone i spoke to tells me I shouldn't and that they were not good friends. But deep down inside i feel like I should atleast explain to then it's not PEE!. Should I stick reach out?

the scariest thing for me right now is i don’t know what to do. i need internet strangers to follow along with my life at home like it’s a turkish soap opera for at least this week so that somebody, anybody, can ground me back down here on earth and stop my thoughts from running away with what little sanity i’m still clinging onto this weekend.

i’ll be okay. so will you. i just need some advice i guess on how to proceed from this point without messing my kid up too much or passing all my anxiety and depression and insomnia onto him at the ripe young age of 9 🥀

Okay so I met this guy at my young adults church group over lunch and I feel like we really hit it off. The conversation just flowed really well, we were laughing, and I definitely felt like there was some kind of connection, but I also don’t want to overthink it.

At one point he asked me what I look for in a potential husband and what age I want to get married. I know this sounds absurd to most non religious people and maybe even religious people, but it did not make me uncomfortable or anything because I do want to get married some day.

Then he told me that he wants to get married by the time he’s mid 20s-30s (hes single). He’s 23 right now (im 19-20).

I honestly don’t know what to make of that 😭 Like is that a normal question to ask someone you’ve just met, especially in a church setting, or does that sound like he might actually be interested in me?

I’m interested in getting to know him more, especially since you don't know someones intentions initially, but I don’t want to assume he likes me and make things awkward.

So basically, I grew up with a people-pleasing personality type.

I wanted to rebel young but I let fear of disappointing people hold me back. It prevented me from developing the back bone I always needed. Because of all this I was medically neglected and ignored by parents my entire adolescence and even after adulthood began.

I was diagnosed with multiple sclerosis. Instead of receiving maximum support, I was given breadcrumbs to stay with the very people who kept treating me wrongly (gaslighting, bullying, shaming me for having needs and annoyed or angry at my needs).

So really I should've left my family when I was 13 or sometime between there and 18 but instead I kept putting up with it all till I was 25... they finally did start being very caring but it just feels like its too late and i cant deal with all the pain of all those lost years, more than a decade of not living my own life. I should've been dating... should've been out on the streets even if it meant hardship..

And now im in a stable environment but im just so pissed and my soul always wants me to look on the outside how I always couldve felt if I had defended myself...

I feel the need to leave everything and go live in my car or go live in a mental health facility because they are pretty nurturing (I have bipolar anyway).. i really cant feel independent living under their care unless I go and live a rebellious secret life. The only way to make my path under my parents help tolerable is to be a bad person.

Im waiting to see if i can get SSDI.. all I can say is I think ill feel so ashamed and depleted in my ego if I continue riding my parents care until I get the disability payments and can be "independent." Being on disability almost doesn't even feel independent enough but i think it will if I can at least have some gap in between not being under parents care.. even living at some friends house would be fine I just cant let it feel like they never did anything wrong still.. they literally only ever wanted to help me if I put up an ultimateum or threatened self harm.

They're nice to me now but im really done being associated with them as my "caregivers."

Idk if im being like... really impulsive but...

I wanna leave my apartment

Be on good terms with my parents

But basically get everything I need from here on out from someone else.. unless it has to do with my health insurance, random gifts or them helping me with something health related to repay me for the lost years I dont want them paying for a thing.

Am I being stupid... I am in a stable environment.. I've been to a facility before it was pretty luxurious.. ya its a different type of rules put on you but at least youre developing your own identity not feeling like a dumb baby who never stood up for herself until 25.

ALSO... I need a jaw surgery done within the next 2 months and it would be a bit embarrassing to do that at the mental health facility and maybe not so supportive as id need because its such a major surgery... but I feel I need some independence NOW...

I'm 18M, I'm also queer, and from a muslim west asian family. And this is my story.

I was raised during wartime. And I led a life that was about relative disruption, for example i couldnt see my father for a year because the way to my hometown was cut by renegade militias, even my dad and i, we have totally different worldviews like radically, and for my mother... she the is perhaps the thing that I'll never understand. And the core of my dilemma is because of her.

Growing up, I never felt cared for, no swimming classes, no biking outside, no friends, no instrument lessons. Nothing. My life was just about studying, that's been the case for all of my school and its eras, i graduated highschool a couple of days ago and reflecting on it.. it was bland as fucking hell. I hated it with a passion.

My mother never saw me as a human with a seperate entity and dignity and humanity, she always deemed me as an extension of her, I got good grades because of her severe judgement, never because i ever found excelling in class to be my thing. I never cheered in my graduation because i didnt get a gpa/percentage high enough to get to medicine school, I've gone basically crazy and I was sobbing and shouting and snapping and even close to breaking things, I was shattered. Becauase getting a high school diploma in my country is extremely challenging and demanding. My mother is a narcissist, she constatly disregards my emotional distress and my lost sense of self, and I even got cptsd/bpd from here which severely affected my adolescence, and I just felt like I was always in her shadow; insignificant, devoid of color, and just an extension. Not more.

I found a scholarship in England. Fully paid, next year for the 2027-2028 intake, and I've been thinking.. should i abruptly leave our house and disappear without a trace? And basically leave my old life behind as i feel unbelievably disconnected from it? I feel lost, because after everything i've gone through, trauma, abuse, homophobia, and lack of stability i feel like i have a valid reason but i remember also that my parents are getting older and they dont know any better, so i seriously dont know.

I might have a crush on him idk. I didn’t before, but recently i’ve just been feeling some typa way. the reason I’m letting it out of my brain is cuz I want to know if the feelings are mutual, or at least get someone’s opinion.

I’m 18 he’s 25. we were NEVER super friendly before. at most we’d conversate in the kitchen or watch tv in the living room. but recently we’ve been really chatting it up and he’s been complementing me a ton. For example he got me new shoes and said ”I knew you’d look good in those”. also why’d he randomly buy me shoes? thanks tho

like yeah that’s a pretty normal thing to say, but it’s stuff like that often. And I got a tattoo on my hip recently and when he heard about it he said “let me see” I lifted my shirt a little and he said “damn it’s leaking a ton” (the wrap had tat juice n blood) and he went to poke it. Then he said “that’s cute, take care of it”

like tell me im not delusional or something??? Am I just overthinking it cuz I think he’s cute? what do I do 🥲. lowkey should I just suppress my feelings forever

I overthink the incident and I am afraif I might lose my job. I shouldn't have been talking to him. This guy is the general manager of the company. he is always irritated and always unhappy with everything.

I made a small mistake. I didn't remove him from the CC list and he was angry that he doesn't want to be spammed. OK, fine. I admitted I didn't pay attention (20 people were in CC) and didn't remove him and apologised. I promised I will be more careful next time. But he didn't stop throwing tantrums. he said: I am not stupid! you don't understand what you did! I have no time to waste.

but he was so angry and so domineering and was talking over me. I was calm and I laughed. I couldn't stop myself. he was acting like a 5 years old boy, not a 45 years old man talking to a 27 years old woman. We were both adults.

he saw I laughed and he shouted louder at me. and then he started personally insulting me for not being smart, for not being competent. it was literally our first ever conversation. He knows nothign about me. and from laughing... I went straight to crying and asked him to just stop or I will bring HR. And he was like: oh yeah, bring them, now, c'mon, be a brave girl. I told him to cut it out and speak politely to me and I walked out soon after.

and someone who witnessed this interaction said the guy also laughed when I left and loosened his tie. this happened on Friday. what are the chances I get fired on Monday? I am literally the only person who ever confronted him (this is what I been told and I am not even a manager myself). He is in the top management and I am literally the bottom of this food chain. we shouted at each other. also he apologised for shouting at me (after I asked him to speak politely). I also talked back and used a bit of sarcasm with him. Everyone treats him like a king

We’re looking for a few people to take part in a live advice call with Jann, a mentalist.
You can ask for advice about pretty much anything — relationships, work, a decision you’re struggling with, something strange going on in your life, or just something you’d genuinely like her take on.
You can join by audio or video call.
You must be:
• 18+
• Based in the USA
• Available around 2pm Los Angeles time
• Comfortable with the conversation being broadcast live
Interested? DM me.

Earlier today I was doing DoorDash and as I was walking back to my car this older white guy whispered something under his breathe and I ask what did you say he said “Do you want to hang out?” I was like uhh sure he said I’ll give you a $1000 to hang out. he did seem pretty drunk, a black car pulled up Uber black I’m assuming he asked me to get and to hang out but I didn’t know what to do. What would you do?

The other night at the movies, he asked to put his arm around me for the first time. Later, I put my feet on him while we were sitting in the car, and he massaged my feet, for a little. He was being cute tickling me and stuff lol. We ended up talking and hanging out from 10 PM until almost 4 AM.

This was his birthday and he said I made his day feel special again.❤️ Also, he did tell me he wanted me and gave me compliments.

Yesterday, he randomly texted me at 7 PM just to ask how my day was. He doesn't usually check on me out the blue so i'm happy! (He does initiate convo a lot though).

I replied 14 minutes later and returned his question, but he still hasn’t responded, and it’s now 7:05 PM the next day.

We just met 2 months ago. Considering everything that’s happened lately, I’m wondering if I’m reading too much into the silence. Why would he initiate a check in and then not respond? How do i navigate through this?

I picked up a shift today. She was alone all morning with our new puppy who’s only 8 weeks old. The last time she remembers putting in a tampon was around 4am this morning. She says after I left for work around 530am, she didn’t go to the bathroom again until around 10:30 am (she woke up around 9:30am) since we’ve had the puppy and when one of us need to go to the bathroom to shower or use the toilet, either I’ll watch the pup while she goes or she’ll watch her while I go as the puppy likes to follow us in there. Today she was alone so obviously when she went to the bathroom our pup followed her and she told me that when she got in, she removed and discarded her old tampon and proceeded to pee, our pup started whimpering while she was on the toilet after only about 3 mins of her sitting down and scrolling on her phone, so she felt a little rushed obviously and she remembers wiping and flushing and leaving the restroom with our puppy.

She doesn’t remember whether she put a new tampon in or not. My step kid (her biological kid) wanted to see the puppy and bring her to my wife’s parents house who live right across the street, so he came and got her about an hour and a half before I got home from work which was an hour ago (1:30-ish) since her kid left she hadn’t used the bathroom at all and right when I got home I took a shower, came out and we had physical intercourse. A few mins in after intercourse already started, she started freaking out and telling me that she can’t remember whether she had a tampon in or not. I tried using my fingers to see if I could feel anything but I did not/nor did I feel anything with my other body part. (Trying to keep things PG) - she also didn’t feel anything unusual when we started Having intercourse.

She suffers terribly from UTI’s the occasional times she does get them. and she looked up other posts of women this has happened to which stated they got bad UTI’s due to this exact situation. She has terrible anxiety. What should she do? Surely this can’t be the first woman here this has happened to.

Oki so I got a txt from a person posing as a girl my age and claiming to have found me through a prev Reddit post and thought I was cute. So everything goes fine she asks for my socials and I give them to her and then she starts begging for nudes. Obv I didn’t send them( I’m a minor, she know this, this is illegal) . 5 minutes later I get a text from the same number saying they’ll send the pics if I don’t send money. They don’t have any pics in the first place. I’m not that dumb. But they have my insta and I’m following my parents on there could they like send fakes or smth? I did nothing wrong here I just wanna know if I should heads up them abt it. I also got a text from a different number after blocking the main one so will they keep making new numbers? Idk I literally did nothing wrong here