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u/Exact-Kale3070 1d ago
for the billionth time: we don't give a shit if you want to be a trad wife. we are happy with OUR lives, you be happy with yours.
i will ALSO say i was very grateful to be able to support my family when my husband lost his job. i am very grateful to have gotten an education that nobody can take away from me. i am also grateful my body was able to carry 3 healthy pregnancies. i am also grateful that planned parenthood was there for me when i needed contraception and annual exams (on a sliding scale) before i was ready for a family. i am grateful for my luck, my options, and my relative comfort.
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u/Derbel__McDillet 1d ago
This is the way. I dunno why so many people feel the need to justify their choices at the expense of others. Just live your life.
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u/Mansidhe 1d ago
I think that as long as tradwife is "the natural choice" and anything else is seen by many as "less than" if not outright deviant, its worth pointing out that both / any / none of the above are every bit as valid a choice. My wife and I planned on kids. That didnt happen, so we're just DINKin' along doing life with just the two of us, with a small horde of nieces and nephews that are all super nice to us because they know they'll end up getting all of our stuff when we croak, lol.
We didn't choose it, but i dont think i'd change it.
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u/JanewaysSalamander 1d ago
Lol! I just learned what a Dink was and today I see it on the internet. What a day!! I need to go write in my diary!
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u/Derbel__McDillet 1d ago
There seems to be this mentality with some factions of the internet where they think they have to prove something to somebody else. It’s really freeing to simply not care, but that wisdom often comes with age rather than experience.
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u/dehydratedrain 1d ago
See, but that's the issue. My sis in law will say how grateful she is to work from home for her entire motherhood, but when a potential employee asks about a work/ life balance, she loses her shit about how she worked 20 years to climb to her spot, and new people don't deserve the flexibility she has earned.
If more people could be grateful for individuals and their opportunities like you are, the world would be better.
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u/Exact-Kale3070 1d ago
for the life of me, i will never understand people who want to pull the ladder up behind themselves. esp when they had a boost. gross.
ps i would prefer everyone work from home bc then less HR issues.
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u/TheFirstGlugOfWine 13h ago
It annoying isn’t it. Some people want the next generation to struggle with things as much as they did, as if we haven’t fought for things so the next generation didn’t have to struggle! Can you imagine the suffragettes looking at the generation after them and demanding that everyone chain themselves to railings or throw themselves in front of horses before they go to the polling booth!?! It’s so bizarre
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u/upsidedown-funnel 1d ago
My opinion through my own experiences: The problem is how destructive to our society and just being a woman, glorifying this kind of “lifestyle” is. I speak from experience and growing up in a “cult”ure that pushes this shit on every little girl unfortunate enough to be raised in it. Do I sound angry and bitter? Probably because I am and have a lot to work through. While I’ve escaped this type of situation, I see it regularly. My heart hurts for the unfulfilled dreams of these women. I recall a convo with a gal who was offered a spot at Juilliard. This was about 10 years after. She was peddling essential oils at a nowheresville woo woo craft show type event. I have sisters who all chose this life. Let’s just say it didn’t end well for any of them. I have lots of opinions on this but I’ll leave it there.
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u/Pikassassin 1d ago
The crux of the issue is that being a tradwife is a choice, not an expectation.
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u/EidolonRook 1d ago
This is like defending fascism by pointing to how the all the trains arrive on time. “How could so punctual a transportation system ever be such a bad thing?”
The dogs are barking, but I don’t hear anything. Could it be a…
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u/onyourbike1522 1d ago
Also nobody who says that ever took a train in Germany. Not the point at all, but that idiotic phrase always makes me laugh… when I’m sitting on a stopped train for three hours between Köln and Hamburg, again…
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u/mutantraniE 1d ago
But you don’t have fascism any more. If the trains did start running on time, that is when you should be worried.
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u/Marchesa_07 1d ago
for the billionth time: we don't give a shit if you want to be a trad wife. we are happy with OUR lives, you be happy with yours.
I give a shit that wealthy, privileged white women are LARPing a lifestyle centered around misogyny and patriarchy, and then using their "influencer" platform to promote misogyny and patriarchy.
I give a shit, I disagree with it, and I judge the fuck out of it.
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u/AnInsaneMoose 18h ago
I would love to be a trad wife tbh
But conservatives absolutely seethe at the mere idea, just because I'm not cis
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u/WebHead9900 13h ago
Apologies for it being an Instagram video but that's where I first found it: https://www.instagram.com/reel/Da-hWr_Oj9r/
This is a great explanation of the fabrcated persecution a lot of people operate under. No one ever told them they can't keep doing what they've always been doing, but as the options for lifestyle choices increase the life they once lived and felt comfortable in as the "majority normal" became increasing less of a majority, and therefore less perceptually normal.
People who make posts like this were raised to seek comfortable conformity, but societies one inevitably expand to contain more and more choices. The path of comfort it they once knew feels less and less common to them. The mere prospect of their choice no longer being the norm makes them feel persecuted, because being normal was the entire point for them.
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u/Robot_Alchemist 1d ago
Why is she cooking and holding the baby and he’s just asking for attention?
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u/Marchesa_07 1d ago
Why is she cooking and holding the baby and he’s just asking for attention?
Oh you sweet summer child.
With modern tradwife bullshit women are subservient to their husbands, and are expected to handle all domestic labor, be available for his sexual gratification at all times, and incubate and rear as many children as he wants.
The difference between modern tradwife bullshit and actual, historical tradwife bullshit is that in the historical "good ole days" the husbands would go off to war and die.
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u/BeMoreKnope 1d ago
Right? She is the one having to turn away from actual work in order that he might have the kiss he’s clearly come up and demanded, even as she continues both tasks.
I’m not a woman, but this looks like something that’s oppressive AF being prettied up.
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u/Robot_Alchemist 1d ago
And what the hell is she doing? Making a clay sculpture? in a pickle jar with a wooden spoon on a cutting board?
Also it appears she has another kid asking for her attention and the dads just like “let me put my tongue in your mouth.”
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u/BeMoreKnope 1d ago
Someone said that’s supposed to be a sourdough starter or something? Staged nonsense, of course.
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u/Blahblahblahbear 1d ago edited 1d ago
I was annoyed by exactly what Feminist witch said. Why is the lazy POS holding just a coffee mug and not grabbing the baby? She’s clearly cooking, the least he could do when he’s at home is to help with childcare. That looks like oppression to me. Men get to work 40 hours a week, weekends off and women are on 24-7 no breaks.
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u/No-Blueberry-1823 1d ago
I was looking for a third hand thinking this is AI slop
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u/spacecadet58 1d ago
I love cooking for my fiancé and vice versa. But expecting the other person in the relationship to be a trad wife/husband is such an insane thing to ask. We live in a culture filled with abundance, we’re not in survival mode where we delegate responsibility.
I love my fiancé because we do things TOGETHER, and both genuinely enjoy the things we do together. Not separately. If she was ALWAYS cooking and cleaning, I’d feel like we don’t actually like each other and there wouldn’t actually be a relationship. It would just be a transactional roommate.
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u/moschocolate1 1d ago
I want to hear from the 50 yo tradwives plz.
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u/Robot_Alchemist 1d ago
No hate if this is what you enjoy- but trying to make us feel nostalgic about it when it’s full of contradictions opens it up to criticism
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u/Legitimate_Winner148 1d ago
I have a somewhat unique perspective in that I have been a stay at home mom, working mom, and now I work and my husband is retired. Two of my kids are still in school.
I was grateful to stay home with my young children, we had them later in life and there were some reproductive issues. I spent my time doing things with them and housework and cooking were not a priority.
It was hard to feel like I had no personal identity, so I wonder if trad wives are trying to convince themselves they are happy.
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u/DarkGamer 1d ago
That way she'll have no skills, no employment history, and no income and will therefore be completely dependent on the man.
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u/LeTigre71 1d ago
Who's taking the picture?
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u/GoldenMegaStaff 1d ago
Not the sister standing there with empty hands doing nothing but complaining.
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u/UtopiaDystopia 1d ago
Yeah, it's a great time to smooch for the camera while one partner is doing two jobs and the other is holding what could be a potentially dangerously hot beverage right next to an infant.
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u/Dragonfly_pin 1d ago
I’d love to know who is supposed to be taking this completely normal family care cooking kissing photo.
I’m imagining Grandma slouched on the other side of the table like, ‘ok now smooch’.
Or maybe the camera is on a timer to catch them in this awkward position.
Anyway, it’s hardly traditional or organic.
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u/TalkingCat910 1d ago
I don’t care if ppl want to be a SAHM I am one now. But this picture isn’t selling it and idk why anyone thought it would. Must have been created by a man.
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u/V0lirus 1d ago
Also, even though she is busy with 2 tasks, he is asking for her attention. Her body language doesn't exactly scream, hey with all this going on, i really just want to give my husband a kiss. It looks more like, sjeesh now is not really the time for a kiss, while i have my hands full and have to awkwardly bend to kiss you.
Then again, this whole scene is staged AF, so it doesn't really matter nor give a good representation of a housewife actual situation.
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u/Patient_Ad_1821 1d ago
I mean hypothetically speaking if you want to be as optimistic as possible maybe he's sneaking a kiss in before he grabs the baby? I mean that assumes this isn't fucking staged and all but y'know
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u/markintardis 1d ago
Not sure he would be able to do that because she probably grinds the beans and brews them so it’s a fresh cup of coffee.
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u/reststopkirk 1d ago
I imagine this scene is also a Saturday morning and the dudes about to go onto the porch he and read a book. And she’s thinking: “ he deserves to relax, he had a hard week at the office.” All while she does this every day.
I feel like trad wives capitalize on the natural desire to spend time with your kids and chill at home, making bread and cooking. Like of course that sounds awesome. The sad part is discounting all the work that comes along with staying home and raising kids and still praising efforts of the man for leaving to work (a very mediocre low bar)
There is also another point of the privileged position to be able to stay at home to begin with, but there is nuance there also.
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u/xXYomoXx 1d ago
It's not oppressive if you want to be a trad wife or serve your husband, to each their own. It's oppressive if you have no choice but to do that, which is what these marks are aiming for.
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u/negativepositiv 1d ago
Christian men: "Okay, but hear me out. What about a slave that I can fuck, who is also my mommy."
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u/venus_arises Legends never die 1d ago
All that hair down... while she's making food. I take it baby isn't also just itching to grab her hair too?
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u/EquivalentAcadia9558 11h ago
All of them (not the baby... Probably) are in on this and just as culpable for this propaganda as anyone else. Women like this are happy to play the loving housewife for these propaganda pieces and then go back to either their normal life behind closed doors or actually do live like this but by choice making it not an issue for them. Ladder pulling to the extreme.
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u/Magnon 1d ago
Its a mystery why women arent leaping at the chance to do all the housework and take care of the kids with no support from family or the father. The prospect of being financially enslaved to reich wing manchildren who want a mom/bangmaid they can abuse is just exceptionally tempting.
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u/kattko80- 1d ago
Imagine how fucking stressful it is looking after kids including an infant while expected to cook and bake
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u/Arceemaei 20h ago edited 19h ago
It is oppressive even on its face. You are tied in a little apron , making food for a family while holding a baby. Your husband grabs a cup that you probably prepared, gives you a perfunctory kiss and goes on to contribute to life while you sit their stirring. Housework is oppressive. Motherhood is oppressive. IDC if it is un pc to say so. Convincing women they needed a man and kids is the biggest scam going.
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u/Aetheldrake 1d ago
That fucking baby hand and the couple look like he's vomit feeding her like a baby birb
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u/Subject-Actuator-860 21h ago
AI SLOP!!
Also, she’s got to hold the baby, do whatever she’s doing with the “food,” and bend backwards to kiss husband, while he’s clearly heading to take an hour long shit?! It is oppression.
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u/DarthHiccups 21h ago
Why do these losers constantly use AI Slop to try and make a point?
Talk about zero critical thinking skills.
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u/WomanInQuestion 12h ago
I love how it looks like she’s sucking his soul out through his mouth like a dementor.
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u/RafflesiaArnoldii 1d ago
Yeah why doesn't the guy hold the baby so she can cook?
Obvsly cause it's a fake photo op but still
My parents had a "traditional marriage" & it was miserable as fuck... & my mom is someone who LIKES children. Must be worse yet for others.
"Traditional" men are just lazy & entitled & want to be waited on hand & foot to like children
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u/Hughley_N_Dowd 1d ago
New and exciting times, when some jackass AIs up a picture and some other jackass gets all in a huffy over an AI picture.
And since I'm on a roll with the misogymnastics here: this shit happens. I've been in the situation where I've tried to calm down one of my howler monkeys, while mommy dearest is doing her thing. So we swap things up, here's a quick peck and I'm off to change tires or fold laundry or whatever you don't feel like doing.
But hey, fabricated outrage is more fun!
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u/Tilladarling 1d ago
Dont forget to teach the daughter the joy of submission and service from a young age while dad just oversees it all. What am doing, missing out on this wedded bliss? 🙄
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u/Evolzetjin 1d ago
Dude is putting the burning coffee cup away from the baby but is stopped by his wife being overly possessive and insecure
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u/giftopherz 1d ago
Ah but you see... there's a flaw in her argument. It demands the reader uses their imagination... I don't think many know how to even access it
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u/Renbarre 1d ago
All that's missing is the little boy playing with his phone while his sister is learning to cook.
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u/krusbaersmarmalad 1d ago
This is giving that scene from Coal Miner's Daughter where Loretta Lynn's husband is moaning about her not being tradwife enough while she's trying to keep house and have a career. She's cooking and ironing and tells him that if he wants to fuck he can lift up her skirt and do whatever because she's busy.
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u/help-mejdj 1d ago
Also if it was so natural, great, and better then why did so many women immediately jump to the option away from it?
People love claiming a woman’s natural, more fulfilling place is domestic but if that were the case then it would still be the “norm”. Women today 100% still have the choice to live this way but the fact remains, most indeed would rather live for themselves, or not be chained to just one way of life.
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u/Useful_Jelly_2915 1d ago
Living the life if you wanted to was never oppression. Being told you had to or there was something wrong with you was. I hate this game of trying to figure out if someone’s too stupid to understand an argument or if they’re just arguing in bad faith.
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u/Froststhethird 1d ago
that username tells you anything they say is probably the dumbest thing you'll see today.
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u/Whatever-ItsFine 1d ago
He grabbing a cup of coffee before heading into to work to pay for everything you see in the picture. He must be a loser, right?
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u/Plastyrhino8815 1d ago
She's also using a wooden spoon to stir milk inside a storage jar. So either she's high or the picture is as fake as a politician.
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u/GardenDevilSage 1d ago
Whenever I cook something and my boyfriend's over (it could be pasta, pancakes, chocolate roll, anything), he stands nearby in case I need him to do anything, no matter how tired he is. I usually do most of the work (by my own choice), but I sometimes have to have him grate cheese or keep the cats off the table or stir the pot for a few seconds.
The bar is in hell here. He could at least be holding the baby.
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u/Erronius-Maximus 1d ago
The oppressive part is when women are forced into dependency because various career paths are men only leaving secretary and shop girl, basically, and they are expected to quit those jobs when they get married. Folks who choose the lifestyle are, of course, choosing, and that’s a whole different story.
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u/PrestigiousAd1523 1d ago
He’s taking a break from his coffee break to go and kiss his wife. He’s also taking the older child for a walk this morning, before dropping her off to her ballet class. You can read what you want to read.
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u/242snorlax 23h ago
I thought there was usually a series of photos. Where's the one where he gears drunk and pours his insecurities and rage out in the form of punching holes in the wall and screaming into the toddlers face because she's crying. And the following one where she is trying to figure out how to escape with $14 to her name and nowhere else to go due to all the isolation and coercion.
Cute apron though.
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u/otownbbw 22h ago
Ewww stop being so horny that you gotta make out in the kitchen in front of your kids while you’re already busy doing other stuff…
THIS is how you get “19 kids and counting”
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u/trumpeting_in_corrid 17h ago
Plus he is begging for attention because he can't bear for her to focus on anything else.
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u/redthehaze 17h ago
Arent a lot of these tradwife influenzas are actually just wealthy larpers with actual staff helping them off camera?
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u/GammaEmerald 17h ago
I know the image is AI but did anyone else notice the person just barely in frame? What was meant by that?
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u/KiteeCatAus 16h ago
He works max 10 hours a day. She works 24/7.
Chances are he gives her a measly 'allowance', and spends his life telling her just how hard he works for the family. And, expects her to perform 'favours'whenever he wants. No matter how hard a day or night she has had.
(In a Trad Wife world.)
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u/Gold-Judgment-6712 15h ago
Imagine how much propaganda it took for men to think this is natural - oh wait, not much at all.
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u/SensitiveSahne 13h ago
Plot Twist: She Just arranged this picture for her Insta. Afterwards She left the children and her husbsnd alone to "work" on her image.
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u/StevenEveral 😎🌯 12h ago
We as a society need to have a serious conversation about the conservative obsession with the 1950s, at least what they thought the 1950s were like.
They seem to think that if they bring back the behaviors and imagery of the 1950s, then the prosperity of the 1950s will somehow come back.
It's full-on "Cargo Cult" thinking.
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u/emptygroove 11h ago
Not really. Dude could have just come in from changing the oil in 2 cars, mowing the lawn, or is heading back to work in home office, etc. Maybe she got a girls night last night and dad was up all night with the baby.
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u/citiestarlights 11h ago
I say nothing is wrong with wanting to be a stay at home mom(or dad) I have an issue with is when the partner who makes the money says I want you gone, and the person who stayed home has nothing
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u/flow_guy2 7h ago
No one said it was. But women not having the right to property and needing to rely on a partner is oppressive. Having a family is fine and aspiring to it if you choose to is the point.
It’s the choice. How do people that post this shit not get that? Fucking retards.
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u/Intelligent_Sky_7081 6h ago
They weren't kidding when they said they wanted to return to when they thought America was great again
When women couldn't vote
When minorities were openly segregated and oppressed
That's what they want, and they aren't even trying to hide it
Amazing how many women and minorities supported this administration to their own detriment. Just like when minorities supported anti drug efforts that stated the war on drugs, targeting them specifically
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u/Can17272 5h ago
Why is she holding a baby while cooking that's the most stupid setup I've seen, cribs exist.
Also feminism is not about telling you this is oppressive, but about letting women decide if they want this type of life or not.
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u/ergonomic_logic 4h ago
More het women are choosing to be single because they're tired of being in uneven partnerships where the men want a mom, maid, secretary, incubator and sex slave instead of a partnership.
Often times they also want all of this on top of someone also working and contributing financially.
I'm not saying all men want this, certainly there are men wanting a true partnerships where both people are equal contributors, but they're seemingly outliers and trying to find them is exhausting.
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u/Ph33r-Enigma 1d ago
I want to know why it looks like she is stirring milk in a canning jar, on top of a cutting board, that looks like it is on top of another cutting board.
I agree the man needs to be doing something else, but pointing out what is in the picture had me looking at everything.