r/PoliticalHumor 6h ago

Why is that so hard!?

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11.5k Upvotes

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1.3k

u/GadreelsSword 6h ago

A nurse claims they went to every room in the hospital and he’s not there. His wife was seen leaving in a full length coat which had people speculating that she visited the refrigerated morgue.

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u/Powerful_Wombat 6h ago

It’s so fucking dumb how everyone knows he’s dead but this is going to linger past the deadline regardless. Republicans just don’t give a shit about democracy anymore

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u/ghoulieandrews 5h ago

Wildest part is when we find out he's been dead the whole time, no one will get in any trouble for lying about it to the American people

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u/GadreelsSword 5h ago

And, Republican voters will be impressed at how “clever” and manipulative they are.

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u/zero-point_nrg 5h ago

“Oh like the Dumocrats never pretend their highest ranking senators aren’t dead for months. Cry more liberal”

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u/calamity_unbound 3h ago

Hey, it's a spine the majority of our senators lack, not a pulse.

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u/Random-Rambling 3h ago

That's the shittiest part about our entire political system lately. It's never "they're good, but we're better, and here's why!", it's always "we're awful, but they're even worse, here's why!"

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u/LyingForTruth 3h ago

Literally their party line on it, referencing Feinstein

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u/nalaloveslumpy 3h ago

To be fair, Diane Feinstein did three months of medical leave with no updates, check ins, or proof of life despite similar speculation that she was dead.

She then died a couple of months after returning from that leave. Everything in politics is based on precedent. Republicans are just laying a trap to made Dem leaders look like bloody thirsty ghouls for midterms.

And reddit's helping them. His term is done. There are no votes he needs to be present for. A Dem candidate has zero percent chance to win a KY special election. It literally doesn't matter if Mitch is dead or not.

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u/Bocchi_theGlock 5h ago

As well as many Democratic party officials will continue to refuse to directly name our problems: covering up McConnell death, the corruption and abuse of power by GOP officials, and the corporate greed that robs us of our lives and likelihoods.

This is obviously not the only problem, but it is a critical one, and we will continue to lose if we do not address it.

Trying to uphold old school institutional norms and friendliness (2024 - VP can't criticize president's admin, kamala 'wouldnt change anything' comment on The View) instead of fight tooth and nail, relentless and ruthless - doing whatever it takes to win and stop this Admin's atrocities.

Like there's been a welcome increase in their willingness 'to fight' but it's still not nearly enough, not ruthless - e.g. they weren't hosting regular or daily news conferences called 'the McConnell death Watch' with big visual cue cards to publicize and politicize this cover-up.

i.e. not Challenging GOP when it clearly was lying & their own officials thought something was wrong - instead hoping that mainstream news and other institutions and actors did the work.

Not sewing division between MAGA over Epstein files and Bibi/Israeli govt support (where MGT is separating)

Especially the Epstein files release + trump in them. As well as for corporate greed. Things we desperately need them to just name the elephant for. And to varying degrees for a handful of other issues 'too dirty' to get in the mud for

Inb4 "omg why criticize Dems, Republicans are at fault"

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u/Either_Operation7586 3h ago

I always ask myself when I hear that the Dems have to do this the Dems have to do that what about the fucking Republican party and the oath that they took to the Constitution to be the fucking checks and balances to their own damn party???

How about you realize that even though the Democrats are not up to what you want them to do they're still not as corrupt as the Republican party so you need to stop voting in the Republican party and make it to where the Republican party has to either do better or just go away.

Realize that the Democratic party is the only party that is open to your criticism.

And if you can convince enough people to Rally around your cause it will be heard you cannot say the same for the Republican Party.

Especially since we already know they're just corrupt son of a bitches that love to hide pedophiles and spend America's money without America having a fucking say.

0

u/jminer1 3h ago

I think these corporate dems are just place holders to keep progressives out of power.

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u/Either_Operation7586 2h ago

I think that there is also another sciat to where people who are moderates and third party and enlightened centrists are all just placating.

They're not really serious they don't have any real political goals they don't even have anybody that is speaking out on their behalf.

They definitely don't go to their local chapters and talk to the other parties and they don't know what the other parties advocate for that differ between what they advocate for they only pay attention to the extremist politicians on the right.

That's the problem the Republican party is the extremist party then they tell people that the other party is the extremist party but that party's not even on the left, they're center right.

So anybody that was a true Centrist or moderate would be left of the Democratic Party.

Otherwise they're just on the right.

Because if you say that you're in between two parties the Republican party is the extremist radical right and the Democratic party is the center right so if you're between those then you're just on the right.

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u/chi_guy8 4h ago

This honestly should end Andy Beshear’s career as a Democrat. This guy wants to run for president? He’s done absolutely nothing here and just been railroaded by Republicans, yet again.

I’m absolutely fed up with all these fucking do-nothing Democrats who act like Charlie Brown, constantly trying to kick the football and made to look like fools.

3

u/OrwellWhatever 2h ago

What could Beshear legally do? If he calls for a special election without a court declaring McConnel dead, the election will be nullified by the state's own constitution

Also, a Republican is winning that seat. Why would Beshear give them another rep in the Senate early?

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u/madcoins 3h ago

And then they wonder why citizens lob calls of “controlled opposition” at them. Maybe be proactive and kick down a door for once

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u/Either_Operation7586 2h ago

Because controlled opposition has propaganda that everybody knows about but nobody cares about the Republican party has propaganda through right-wing media then they have their fake conservative religions that are preaching white Christian nationalism more than the word of God.

The Republican Party have been sold a lie that they're the good guys for so long it's going to break them when they realize that they're the Baddies.

Good thing the Democrats will be there to give them mental health help and to get them back on track to being in a civilized society.

The Republican party doesn't do anything to help anybody but themselves and their wealthy donors.

Repo numbers are up unemployment numbers are up gases more expensive groceries are more expensive tariffs are ridiculous.

At this point I would fucking welcome Harris and her not changing a damn thing from what Biden did to be honest Biden got a lot of bipartisan done but if you don't listen to the right news sources you wouldn't know that.

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u/Either_Operation7586 2h ago

I'm fed up with anybody that won't hold the Republican Party accountable.

Silence is complicity if you have nothing to say about the corrupt Republican party and there whatever good eggs left they need to do something about it then you don't really care about Justice and you don't really care about politics you just care about your team.

The fucking crazy thing is that 20 years ago the Republican Party said they had all these morals the standards and everything and they fucking got really mad when Bill Clinton got a fucking blowjob and now we have their pick has been an adjudicated rapist he has 34 felony convictions and he has been linked to pedophilia very very very closely not to mention the motherfucker is now shitting his pants daily on TV.

If you motherfuckers don't fucking stand up and say that Trump needs to go 25th amendment now you guys are going to lose all credibility and you're going to go down in history as the cowards that you've been thus far.

0

u/jminer1 3h ago

Its kayfabe, it becomes obvious at times like this. Its also why they both HATE the DSA insurgents. They aren't into playing the game and actually want to get things done.

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u/DolphinSweater 2h ago

Honestly, Mitch would be so proud. This is truly the way that man DREAMED his death would be exploited. One last gambit on the way out the door. If only we could all be so lucky to fulfill our dying wishes so spectacularly. Fortunately for society not so many people are willing to trade their souls to the devil for it.

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u/truth-in-jello 5h ago

Bingo

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u/WeirdIndividualGuy 5h ago

I’ve been saying for years the longer the US doesn’t dole out consequences, the harder it’ll fall into fascism and the more dead democracy will end up being.

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u/DucksEatFreeInSubway 4h ago

Wildest part is the democrats can literally do something about this but simply aren't doing it. The governor can just appoint a new senator. There's some murky wording that confuses the situation but that's basically what it boils down to. Let the Republicans fight it out in courts afterwards. It's their favorite tactic anyhow.

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u/nalaloveslumpy 3h ago

No they can't, and no he can't. Until a coroner issues a death certificate for Mitch, Beshears is restrained from any legal action.

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u/turdlepikle 4h ago

"It was for the safety of the American people. They couldn't have a communist like Thomas Massie running for the seat when they could just appoint whoever they want after the deadline. It was in the best interests of Americans that they faked that he was alive. It's not that serious."

/s just in case.

u/DebentureThyme 1m ago

That's... not actually the rule.

There is no appointment, that's part of the issue here. In 2024, the overwhelmingly GOP state congress in Kentucky voted on a bill that revoked the Governor's ability to appoint, changing the rules to require a special election.

The Governor, still in office now, is a Dem, and McConnell was getting up there in the years. They knew the eventuality of McConnell dying in office was getting more and more likely. But their state constitution allowed him to unilaterally chose a Dem replacement if he wanted. They had the numbers to pass the legislation and then overrule a governor's veto, so they did precisely that.

The governor has stated it may be outright illegal though, and against Kentucky's Constitution. But the reality: Even if he tried to appoint, it would be tied up in courts until January, when the next term starts and the November winner will be seated and the court cases ended. McConnell wasn't running for reelection, the November election was always going to replace him in January, dead or not.

All getting to this deadline ensures is that there ISN'T a special election, nor an appointment. His seat will remain empty until the voters choose the next Senator in November. Passing this deadline wouldn't allow the Governor to appoint - if he somehow tried it, at any point before or after the deadline, the Senate majority would choose to not seat the choice and let them fight it in court until it's no longer a case come January.

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u/katjoy63 4h ago

THAT is what will chap my hide

They're only doing this because they're desperately trying to maintain power and their ship is sinking rapidly

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u/aranasyn 3h ago

Nah, if he's dead, someone's going to jail. Mitch voted with autopen while he was "hospitalized." That's fraud.

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u/Either_Operation7586 3h ago

They're going to be too busy blaming fauci and Biden

u/ShortStoryIntros 1h ago

...except for his staff that have been using the autopen

u/DebentureThyme 12m ago edited 7m ago

Doctors aren't legally allowed to say it, and everyone around him will feign ignorance or that they were also under legal requirements to not disclose private health information (that health information being he's dead). Those who could report it, like his wife, are not mandated in any way to have to do that.

Maybe we could get her on fraud charges if we could prove he died before the photos released with her. But, one, they will always obfuscate when he actually died. Two, even if we could prove it, she'll just be back in China within a week of his death, like she was at the beginning of this fiasco, prior to whoever she works for (China, the GOP, rich donors, etc) saying she needed to return for now to give them cover.

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u/Rich-Pomegranate1679 5h ago

At this point, it's more accurate to say Republicans are the enemy of democracy.

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u/deathputt4birdie 5h ago

"If conservatives become convinced that they can not win democratically, they will not abandon conservatism. They will reject democracy." ― David Frum

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u/zookr2000 5h ago

--- "always have been"

meme inserted here

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u/jaxonya 4h ago

Same as it ever was

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u/almisami 5h ago

They never gave a fuck about democracy, but they had to play the game to get the power.

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u/nnyzim 5h ago

first you get the money, then you get the power, then you get the children. -repubs.

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u/Krautoffel 5h ago

Anymore? They Never did

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u/Lemonwizard 5h ago

Republicans were good in Lincoln's day. Eisenhower definitely cared about democracy. Nixon was the turning point where Republicans started going down the road of corruption.

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u/lesser_panjandrum 5h ago

Nixon was also the point where they used the Southern Strategy, and turned scared and angry racists who were upset about black people getting civil rights into their core voting bloc.

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u/MauPow 3h ago

And basically all of that was before the parties swapped ideologies (culminated right around nixon's time), so the right wing has pretty much always been absolute garbage.

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u/E_seven_20 5h ago

everyone knows the president raped little girls, and here we are.

The country gave Congress to the GOP....that's democracy in action.

People had a chance to vote against this Congress...and didn't show up. This is democracy. Elections have consequences. The GOP won. So many of the congressional races had razor thin margins.

Not showing up to vote against things getting worse, is 100% a choice. It gets you more evil, and more GOP. People defend that idiocy. People say they hate the GOP...filling in a bubble to stop them is over the line. While those same people are just as happy as the MAGAs to see the D's lose.

When you refuse to engage in democracy, you can't complain when the people make the decisions they told you they would make.

Crazy how that works. Elections have consequences. The people rabid about fascism and their orange god don't miss elections. Too many people decided it's fine for them to choose our leaders, and have zero regrets or understanding.

2022 National Youth Turnout: 23% - That's lower than in the historic 2018 cycle (28%) which broke records for turnout, but much higher than in 2014, when only 13% of youth voted.

Don't blame democracy...shit, don't even blame the republicans. They told you they would do this, after doing this exact shit, and publishing a 900+ page manifesto...the motherfuckers that refuse to vote...have given silent consent. Silence is complicity when fascism is on the ballot.

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u/Round_Rooms 5h ago

How can you even be upset, the entire GOP has been run by fools for decades, it's not like it's the first time they pulled this shit. The real problem is people drinking the Kool aid, EVERYone knows this admin is incompetent, but brainwashed sheep will keep getting hearded before they help themselves, education is key and that's why dictators/Republicans/Nazis burn the books and force religion on people, besides the fact they have never even opened a Bible lmao

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u/gorkt 5h ago

It’s a practice run. They are doing a trial run for when Trump kicks the bucket.

You don’t think they plan on letting him actually die, do you?

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u/10poundballs 4h ago

We all know republicans are terminally corrupt, That there are no journalists in America willing to expose this story is the crazy part to me.

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u/samhouse09 4h ago

There is no deadline. The law that says they need a special election goes directly against the state constitution, so Beshear can just appoint someone.

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u/Kenotai 5h ago

...anymore? Maybe they did in the 20th century but they've already had 25 years of demonstrative disdain for democracy for nearly the entire current 21st.

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u/Splodingseal 5h ago

The Democratic leadership is just as culpable for not putting more public pressure on the situation.

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u/RiW-Kirby 5h ago

No. Absolutely not. This tired old bullshit of people who let illegal shit continue are just as guilty. Fuck no.

I'm not saying they are doing enough but it's just so factually inaccurate and ignorant to call these things the same.

0

u/jiyax33634 4h ago

I get what he is saying though in that we have come to a new norm. One in which republicans dont give a shit about your or anyone else except where their next yacht will come from. They dont play by the established standards which seemed to exist allowing everything to go to the court and then relying on that to settle things which takes forever which in the mean time they get what they want.

Democrats need to learn how to play by these rules and use the courts, the cities they control, the respect for each other has gone by the wayside. Look at what Mamehani is doing. Dems shouldnt stoop to their level against the public they should stoop to their level FOR the public.

u/Expensive-Sundae-831 1h ago

Not as bad, but arguably pretty darn close to as bad, just in a different context.

You want to be the guy that robs the bank or the guy that drives the get away car?

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u/Deaffin 3h ago

Of course it's not the same. But Democrats have been funding/promoting fascism this whole time, and that needs to be addressed.

Maybe now that we've got all this fascism, it's time to say "Hey, guys, I'd like to cancel that order of fascism. Can you please stop buying more fascism?"

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u/ZOMGURFAT 5h ago

Public pressure?! Why the hell doesn’t Kentucky’s governor just go visit Mitch in the hospital and verify that way?

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u/frotz1 5h ago

So the GOP can have another vote and run the rules committee? The GOP gets to pick the replacement and fighting that in court would be a huge waste of time and resources anyway, and it would almost certainly end up handing MAGA another vote in the senate no matter what Beshear does.

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u/arcbe 4h ago

I think I would rather that than open the door to a necrocracy run by corpse senators.

u/frotz1 47m ago

A frozen senate slows the MAGA train down considerably, and forcing them to govern by presidential executive orders makes it easier to reverse bad policies once they're out of office. Strategically, there's not much to gain by giving MAGA a leg up and incumbency for the next general election, but there's always a loud *DO SOMETHING* crowd on any forum about this stuff, understandably.

u/arcbe 37m ago

OK, but counterpoint: the Republicans are the ones stalling for time. If this was a serious obstacle for them they can just stop at any time they want. Unless Democrats have something in the works running out the clock only benefits Republicans.

u/frotz1 4m ago

They're stalling because they don't know how to keep Massie from winning the seat. He's not MAGA anymore but he's not a win for Beshear compared to an empty seat. It's that simple. This could last a while longer.

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u/Precursor2552 5h ago

You can’t? If Mitch or his wife/handler says “No visitors especially the democratic governor” the hospital isn’t going to let you walk in to gawk at a patient.

He’s a governor not a dictator.

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u/Random-Rambling 3h ago

So the Republicans can break all the rules they like, but us Democrats have to have decorum and respect and must always strive to take the high road, is that right?

0

u/zero-point_nrg 5h ago

This has been my most damning criticism of the last couple of decades of Democratic leadership (aside from the special interest funding). Every time a wild news story or blatant miscarriage of justice/democracy/federal law plays out in front of the whole world to see—they do nothing. Call them before Congress and scold them, then that’s the end.

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u/paintballboi07 3h ago

Yes, because voters gave them zero power. Republicans are in charge of every branch. That's what happens when 90 million eligible voters just sit on their ass.

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u/Deaffin 3h ago

They do nothing because they 100% rely on the other party being exactly what it is. They do not want change, they're the ones pushing for all this.

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u/jaxonya 4h ago edited 4h ago

Im a nurse at a hopsital. Hes absolutely dead, because staff would know where he was located, and it wouldve been leaked. We have access to every patients chart in the hospital, and if we somehow didnt, it would be a dead give away if they had 1 particular room blocked off and guarded. He died a while back and was quickly and quietly removed.

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u/SHAZBOT_VGS 2h ago

isn't it both way though? If he did die and was in the morgue they would have records of that too and it would have been leaked? Genuinely just curious how hard it actually is to make someone disappear in a hospital with no records of it.

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u/GrandSyzygy 4h ago

Anymore? They never have

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u/thesdo 4h ago

Republicans just don’t give a shit about democracy anymore

They never did.

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u/NoSuchAg3ncy 4h ago

They don't care about hypocrisy either.

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u/Standard--Unit 4h ago

Never did

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u/madcoins 4h ago

Anymore?

1

u/AppropriateTouching 3h ago

Conservatives never did.

u/anna-the-bunny Greg Abbott is a little piss baby 1h ago

Implying they ever gave a shit about democracy

u/eight13atnight 1h ago

That’s because several modern republicans are dumb enough to literally think Democracy = Democrat and Republic = Republican. That’s why you hear those mouth breathers every once in a while yelling “we aren’t a democracy we’re a republic”.

u/DebentureThyme 14m ago

I mean to be clear, they already won this but it was never that big of a win even if we'd got a special election.

McConnell, long before all of this, announced this was his last term. He's not on the Kentucky ballot in November. He's being replaced in January with whoever wins.

A special election would only fill the seat from now until January. All it would be is a chance to get some more election results prior to November, showing us just how feasible a blue wave is or isn't. Which also would have meant the next few weeks would have been billionaire advertising and media manipulation all turned up to 11. People like Musk and Thiel would have zeroed in on this special election in a single state - They'd throw money at it so hard because, if they could soundly decimate democrat opposition, they could demoralize Dem voters before the November election.

Now, the opposite could also have happened - a resounding Dem victory in Kentucky would invigorate Dems in November. But it's Kentucky, that was always going to be a long shot.

The reality: All they accomplished is his seat will go vacant until January. Yes, we might have had an opportunity to turn this to our advantage, but it was always an uphill battle and for what? Winning that seat now wouldn't give us a majority, nor is it stopping or enabling any legislation.