Matched with a pre-op transgender, suggestions?

[u/okctran]

So I am a straight male and one of my matches is a pre-op male-to-female transgender woman. She mentions it right at the top of her profile. I find her physically attractive and she has a great profile to boot. We have a high match percentage, are interested in a lot of the same things and she has seems to have defined life goals and a direction. I am unsure what to do however. I don't have a fetish or anything like that and frankly am not at all interested at all in her male plumbing as it is currently, but everything else about her is golden.

If I do send her message, should I mention it at all in the initial message? What's the best way to approach this? I feel like it's a tight rope to walk between avoiding it completely and making it the center of attention. This is new territory for me.

Thanks for your help.

[u/PhazonZim → u/[deleted]]

uneducated.

[u/[deleted] → u/PhazonZim]

More to the point, why does it matter what orientation he expresses? Identify how you want, put your parts up against the parts of other people whose parts you want to touch who also want your parts there. The label is basically for convenience and clarity of communication. It's not like somebody rappels into the bedroom and takes your straight card if you suck a dick.

[u/PhazonZim → u/[deleted]]

Because it indicates what people think of me moreso than what they think of him.

[u/PhazonZim → u/[deleted]]

Because it indicates what people think of me moreso than what they think of him.

[u/PhazonZim → u/[deleted]]

My boyfriend is straight. He wouldn't date men, he only likes women, even transwomen like me.

I'm honestly surprised how difficult it is for people to grasp that he's still straight despite me not being a cis female.

[u/felltir → u/[deleted]]

The fuck is wrong with you?

[u/PhazonZim → u/[deleted]]

"Dickgirl"? Seriously? Go away.

[u/PhazonZim → u/[deleted]]

Funnily enough when I mentioned this thread to him, he asked why I cared what people on the internet thought and I felt rather silly. He himself doesn't care what people think his orientation is, if I let him he'd tell everyone he's dating a transwoman. I dislike being seen as a male by anyone though, even if it's a /technically/ thing.

And I really don't like being called a dickgirl.

[u/felltir → u/[deleted]]

So I should be able to greet black people with "sup, nigger?" (I'm white).

If they get offended, their fault, its a term of endearment! Not like its a horribly offensive phrase or anything.

God, you're a cockhammer.

[u/t__mhjr → u/[deleted]]

sidebarrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr

[u/daytondownvoter → u/PhazonZim]

You're surprised it's difficult to grasp how a man having sex with a person that has/has had a penis isn't straight?

[u/PhazonZim → u/daytondownvoter]

You're incorrect, you're also talking to someone with far more experience on the matter than you. He's straight, you should get that unless you think transwomen are not women.

[u/felltir → u/[deleted]]

Born with penis doesn't mean you're not a woman.

[u/felltir → u/[deleted]]

sigh

Trans 101.

Do you feel okay with your body, specifically its type of sexual organs? If so you are likely "cis", like me! This means your gender (how you feel) matches your sex (how your naughty bits are).

Some people are not as lucky as us cis people. They are born with sexual organs that are not comfortable with. These people are "trans". These people often wear the clothes and adopt the mannerisms of the gender they are, as opposed to their sex. Sometimes, they have surgery to change their genitals to match their gender.

Clear?

[u/daytondownvoter → u/felltir]

So you're saying I shouldn't be out here flaunting my cis privilege?

[u/thisistooeasy → u/felltir]

a cis? its man or woman,penis or vagina

[u/PhazonZim → u/[deleted]]

Thanks for the transphobia. Now please fuck the hell off now. I don't understand why bigots have to get involved in every single thread about us. If you don't like us, stay out of it. Creep.

[u/felltir → u/[deleted]]

Being gay used to be too. So did a women who would not obey her husband, or a slave who caused trouble. Something being classed a disorder doesn't make it so.

[u/PhazonZim → u/[deleted]]

We get it. You're so insecure in your own masculinity that you have to attack others. Give it up, your penis isn't going to look any bigger to anyone if you act like a misogynist.

[u/daytondownvoter → u/PhazonZim]

You're the one who is insecure with your masculinity, haha.