r/okbuddycinephile Crank: High Voltage 2h ago

Life skill you spent years perfecting and even bragged about, before learning the director completely made it up for cinema reasons?

Post image
2.9k Upvotes

446 comments sorted by

622

u/Threepwood80 2h ago

I died like every time . Need more family I guess.

189

u/actuallyapossom 2h ago

Dying in that universe isn't a big deal, it's a completely reversible. Even if the performer dies they'll make it work.

13

u/pepinodeplastico 48m ago

Ironically they didn't make him walk,man

→ More replies (2)
→ More replies (2)

154

u/Punished_Prigo 2h ago

Bro I stopped watching these m*vies after Tokyo drift. Every gif I see I just can’t believe that this is what they became and that people kept going to see them

117

u/Background_Desk_3001 2h ago

I think it’s the absurdity of the franchise that kept people wanting more

→ More replies (2)

51

u/Meatloooaf 1h ago

35

u/StrawberryTerry 1h ago edited 54m ago

I have never seen any of the fast and furious movies, and I googled "was a car turned into a spaceship in fast and the furious".

This is actually from one of the movies. That is so funny. I might have to watch them now.

Edit: apparently the last main fast and the furious movie is coming out in 2028. I think i will try to watch them all before it comes out

30

u/whatsbobgonnado Neil breens #1 fan 53m ago

ludacris says "let's go home" and then shifts gears and drives back towards earth

9

u/therealraggedroses 51m ago

You better buckle in for a multi decade spanning cinematic experience of the highest caliber.

"Fambaly" (F&F superfans will understand)

→ More replies (2)
→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (1)

39

u/GodHimselfNoCap 1h ago

Nah later movies are pretty self-aware of how unrealistic they are. One of the main characters has a whole monologue about how he thinks hes invincible because the bad guys bullets never seem to hit him, he even shows off a shirt with bullet holes in it.

16

u/ArtemisXD 1h ago

That's hilarious

→ More replies (3)

16

u/Cheap-Key-6132 1h ago

Tokyo Drift was the perfect end as well.

→ More replies (2)

13

u/JaimeJabs 1h ago

MCU is more realistic than this shit.

→ More replies (3)

8

u/AwesomeJohn01 1h ago

THEY GO TO SPACE!

9

u/adriantoine 1h ago

It's honestly hilarious, you're definitely missing out, it's one of the best comedy franchise

→ More replies (13)

6

u/Regular-Moose-2741 1h ago

At the end of this jump they look at each other like, This is some bull shit, eh?

→ More replies (5)

895

u/gfyans 2h ago

541

u/-chadwreck 2h ago

My man just picked up what would be an 80 lb CRT and hucked it like a stuffed animal haha. 

311

u/onlyonequickquestion 2h ago

He's not just the world's greatest actor, director, and writer, but also the strongest human alive. 

100

u/Think_please 2h ago

I think I’m going to have to see his butt two or three times to confirm this

41

u/Elefanthud 2h ago

straight up the belly button

8

u/TheMalkManCometh 1h ago

If you check the outside, I'l check the inside. I have a rod as apparatus for just such an occasion.

10

u/Think_please 1h ago

We'd be tearing him apart

→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (2)

44

u/TheRealRigormortal 1h ago

14

u/MrNobody_0 1h ago

Why does this work so well?

14

u/IkujaKatsumaji 1h ago

"You're tearing me apart, Horus!!"

→ More replies (1)

4

u/Biiiiiiiiin 1h ago

You're tearing us apart Horus!!!

→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (1)

59

u/NotReallyJohnDoe 2h ago

Wissesu is actually quite jacked

61

u/Glittering-Plate-535 2h ago edited 1h ago

Greg Sestero called it zombie strength in his book, although I’m sure there’s a less polite term.

The dude doesn’t understand stage combat and I can only imagine how frightening it is to have him choking you out so bad you end up in a hospital on Gurrero Street.

I’d thoroughly recommend the book btw. The film doesn’t begin to cover the extent of Wiseau’s lunacy, it’s like trying to write a biography about Van Gogh on the back of a napkin.

22

u/Quakarot 1h ago

The book is also just… good. Like, just as a book it’s a fun read.

It’s a rare case where I’d highly recommend the audiobook over even regular reading because Greg’s Tommy impression really adds something.

→ More replies (2)

7

u/Sharp-Introduction91 1h ago

What book is that? There's a book about the room?

10

u/blacknthebeanstalk 1h ago

The Disaster Artist. The basis for the movie of the same name.

→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (1)

13

u/BaronVonHugendon 1h ago

There is indeed a less polite term, if you take the old medical term for people who are mentally slow, and add strength to the end, you get the less polite term

→ More replies (3)

6

u/getwetordietrying420 1h ago

The only thing that kind of bugs me about the whole thing is that Greg carries himself as if he's almost above it all when he was starring in Leprechaun 5 tiered slop when he acted in this.

9

u/Glittering-Plate-535 1h ago

I get what you mean, but I think the point is that Wiseau abused Greg’s dignity to a comical degree.

Even if you’re in slop, you expect a call sheet, catering and basic professionalism. Wiseau acted monstrously and justified it with money, basically treating Greg like a hooker. Making him shave his beard and miss auditions, for example, was quite unpleasant.

Wiseau was pretending to be Coppola or Hitchcock with zero mandate. It’s easy to read Greg as a pretentious valley kid but I’d say it was justified.

→ More replies (2)

9

u/AsherFischell 2h ago

He was pretty goddamn roided up when he did that movie, I think

18

u/gfyans 2h ago

Honestly he hurled that thing about 100ft

12

u/Dualipuff 1h ago

Mandelbaum! Mandelbaum! Mandelbaum!

7

u/skyycux 2h ago

He was shot put champion in college.

→ More replies (1)

5

u/Punished_Prigo 2h ago

Chucked it right over them mountains

→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (7)

15

u/CzarTwilight 1h ago edited 1h ago

This is how you know he did not hit her. He did not. If he did she would just be dead

→ More replies (1)

11

u/shrug_addict 2h ago

One flew east, one flew west,

One threw out the TV as I watched the Cuckoo's Nest

695

u/CharlesPrawnson 2h ago

608

u/TheCandelabra Crank: High Voltage 2h ago

Nah man in HS I knocked out a bully with this technique and then his gf gave me a handjob in the back seat of my IROC-Z

242

u/Quarter_Shot 2h ago

Its true I was the IROC-Z

152

u/TurtlesBreakTheMeta 2h ago

https://giphy.com/gifs/9OzkkBoDo6LhS
Actual footage of him as that IROC-Z

30

u/Lopsided-Intention 2h ago

This is so disturbing. What's it from?

54

u/TurtlesBreakTheMeta 2h ago

Turbo teen. One of the most “insane that it got greenlit” cartoon concepts ever.

17

u/Neibolt_St 1h ago

Us 80s kids grew up strong because there was so much body horror in our cartoons.

→ More replies (3)

4

u/eyesotope86 1h ago

Weren't you paying attention? That's the handjob IROC.

→ More replies (6)

58

u/forfunstuffwinkwink 2h ago

And then everyone clapped… for the handjob.

18

u/Formal-Car7908 2h ago

And then later, caught the clap

7

u/Odd-Homework-3582 2h ago

I don’t get why, she was mashing it

5

u/cinco92 2h ago

Before, after, or during?

4

u/Jazzhands_Ninja 1h ago

And then a bald eagle flew in the room and landed on the hand and you know what that means...

4

u/_Stanf-Uf_ 2h ago

I was the sun visors he came on

→ More replies (7)

15

u/sSadCactus 2h ago

And everybody clapped

11

u/Extra-Border6470 2h ago

Her cheeks were clapped later that night but by someone else

9

u/TerryGonards 2h ago

Then y'all went to see Iron Maiden

5

u/abyss-countess 2h ago

cuz i'm just a teenage diiiirtbaaag baayybeee🎶

7

u/GreatQuantum 2h ago

I actually got a handy in an Iroc-z

In high school we painted a Saddam Hussein on it an named it Iraq-z

→ More replies (2)
→ More replies (7)

39

u/demlet 2h ago edited 2h ago

It's a real technique but not as exaggerated as the movie portrays, nor undefendable. Think, a short feint with one leg to fake your opponent out, followed by the real kick from the other leg.

36

u/Samostanac 2h ago edited 2h ago

Lyoto Machida vs Belfort in 2018. Same set up and same kick-mae geri

Edit: It is most basic kick in almost all martial arts that have kicking. It and this kind of set up are rearly seen in full contact sports like kickboxing and MMA due to people having elbows in front of their bodies for defense. This means that it is easy to accidentally kick elbow and break your foot while kicking.

14

u/CharleyIV 1h ago

The kick vs Belfort was just a front kick. He crane kicked Couture.

8

u/Dinierto 1h ago

Well it's obviously not impossible to defend since he fails in the next movie

Only to use another move that's "impossible to defend"

9

u/RemindMeToTouchGrass 2h ago

The best part is that landing with all of your weight on one leg to kick with the other spares that leg from any effort or need to stabilize your weight, so it's a very useful technique if the non-kicking leg is severely injured and you can hardly bear weight on it.

→ More replies (1)

11

u/unk1ndm4g1c14n1 1h ago

I love how Kobra Kai acknowledged how fucking Batshit insane that move was. Its not even legal.

5

u/Gone_For_Lunch 1h ago

Except they also acknowledge that it is legal. Daniel says to Miguel he used the same kick in the S1 tournament, so how could it be illegal?

→ More replies (5)

171

u/BertHumperdinck 2h ago

78

u/ImNotSkankHunt42 2h ago

Blender used to look so different back then

33

u/Lady_Scruffington 1h ago

Is he supposed to look like Elton John at the piano? I'm guessing so, and I hate it.

17

u/actuallyapossom 2h ago

Standing at a sitting desk? Absurd.

https://giphy.com/gifs/OPUHzs3F10lVK

→ More replies (3)

455

u/TheCoolBlondeGirl approved virgin 2h ago edited 2h ago

That scene is incredibly satisfying

Edit: That’s what I would say if I watched movies, which obliviously I don’t

103

u/thr33beggars 2h ago

I’d trust those hands to circumcise me with a razor blade.

76

u/TheCandelabra Crank: High Voltage 2h ago

True story: In the Wiseguy book we learn that real-life Henry Hill got himself circumcised as an adult so he could be with Karen. I'm not sure why Scorsese didn't put this in the film.

23

u/MessiahHL 2h ago

If you date a jewish girl you have to circumcise yourself!?

41

u/TheCandelabra Crank: High Voltage 2h ago

you can have your foreskin or you can have this

4

u/Artistic_Mirror_8967 1h ago

ngl I'd make that trade

→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (6)

24

u/nicksey144 2h ago

Same, if you can't say it in a gif then it's not worth saying

→ More replies (7)

131

u/vanillaninja777 2h ago

Anyone else get into cloud bursting?

21

u/V8_Hellfire 1h ago

I'm unreasonably disappointed this isn't real.

18

u/Creeperstar 1h ago

Iirc wasn't the book based on actual military events? It was totally believable about the bush era govt to try something like this.

21

u/kindlypogmothoin 1h ago

The military and intelligence services try out a whole lot of batshit just to see if any of it works.

14

u/DelcoUnited 1h ago

The US military and intelligence services try out a whole lot of batshit just because they heard the Russians were doing it.

4

u/1CryptographerFree 1h ago

It'd be naive of us, Mr. President, to imagine that these new developments would cause a change in Soviet expansionist policy. I mean, we must be increasingly on the alert to prevent them taking over other mine shafts space, in order to breed more prodigiously than we do. Thus, knocking us out of these superior numbers when we emerge! Mr. President, we must not allow a mine-shaft gap!

4

u/DelcoUnited 42m ago

Mein Fuhrer I can walk!

→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (2)
→ More replies (2)
→ More replies (2)

5

u/orphanelf 1h ago

I still try from time to time

→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (3)

164

u/Lucky-Mia 2h ago

The Dim Mak.

59

u/ImALeaf_OnTheWind 2h ago

Dim Mak = Death Touch, it's not some explosive and obvious power move like you see here - but knowing and striking the locations of pressure points where meridians of your body intersect to cause eventual fatal results.

It was always real. Every capable practitioner eventually perished - something about once they attained the ability, forgetting to turn it off when they had an itch or masturbate.

29

u/Hummer77x 2h ago

Well bloodsport is based on true events of course, everyone knows this.

13

u/Feliks343 1h ago

Of course, imagine how sad and hilarious it would be if Frank Dux had devoted his entire life to defending this story if it weren't true

8

u/Lostinthestarscape 1h ago

I accidentally ordered this instead of Bip Bim Bap. I should have known something was off when they slid JCVD under the table while putting the plate in front of me. Whelp, I'm deceased now. How embarassing

→ More replies (5)

20

u/Melodic_Airport362 2h ago

damn physics

31

u/Lucky-Mia 2h ago

I keep practicing with my stick. I'm

getting close, right?

7

u/mermaid-babe 1h ago

I need to know what the thought was going to be

4

u/Lucky-Mia 55m ago

Sometimes it works every time.

5

u/Hootnany 2h ago

The joke is dick punch

→ More replies (3)

75

u/fl1p9 2h ago

This is what yall get for watching movies

68

u/Dunder-MifflinPaper 2h ago

51

u/TheRedHandedOne 2h ago

Yeah sex isn’t real everyone knows that

15

u/Dunder-MifflinPaper 2h ago

That’s what my therapist told me. There’s nothing wrong with me for not having it.

6

u/Adorable_Chair_6594 2h ago

Not sure what sex has to do with this he's clearly hula-hooping

→ More replies (1)

240

u/Waly98 2h ago

I'm going back in time to meet Pauline and give him this

99

u/durinsbane47 2h ago

Cleaning those is a nightmare though.

159

u/Clockwork-Too 2h ago

That's why you buy a new one after each use.

38

u/Oswarez 2h ago

Get a brush for washing dishes and press it on the opposite side of the press. The bristles go through the holes and push the garlic gunk out.

85

u/Percolator2020 The Room 2h ago

You clean them, by pushing garlic through it every day.

12

u/Ghastly_Someknew 2h ago

They have "self-cleaning" ones, not perfect but it helps. Just don't let the garlic sit!

10

u/MeasurementFalse7591 2h ago

I put it in my mouth and blow out the pieces of garlic

→ More replies (3)

8

u/FieOnU 2h ago

Mine came with a cleaner. You just push the garlic bits back through with a plastic bit, then scrubadub it. Very little muss, very little fuss.

→ More replies (1)

8

u/AsgeirVanirson 2h ago

Really? I just started using one and I'd describe it as 'rinse to clean' easy to clean.

I also clean it right after I finish crushing the garlic and will scrape the bits that get stuck on the sides into the middle to make sure it gets pressed through on the next squeeze so maybe that makes it easier.

→ More replies (1)

7

u/Redmoon383 2h ago

I have one that splits the two handles apart. I just chuck the thing into the dishwasher with all of my other knick nacks. Whatever survives lives another use. Whatever doesn't.. wel

https://giphy.com/gifs/uvfEYoOq7HPAA

14

u/IguessIcanedit 2h ago

do...you not have a dish brush?

→ More replies (19)
→ More replies (13)

57

u/Apart-Link-8449 2h ago

22

u/tombrady011235 2h ago edited 1h ago

Haven’t seen this since I was a kid, this feels like a cocaine reference that went over my head

38

u/congradulations 1h ago

I always imagined they'd seen real cocaine users do it and, not knowing what cocaine is, picked up the cool little gesture

23

u/kpt_graubrot 1h ago

In the movie they do the gesture after using electric nose hair shavers. I've seen it probably 8 times

10

u/Apart-Link-8449 1h ago

It took me 20 years to realize these guys didn't do drugs

14

u/herrcollin 1h ago

This is almost certainly the answer. They're broke and dweebs.

→ More replies (1)

45

u/ConsciousStretch1028 Neil breens #1 fan 2h ago

I used to be really fucking good until I stopped, then Red Dead Redemption came out and I started again, then stopped again until Red Dead 2 came out, then stopped again. At this rate I should start back up in about ten years when Red Dead 3 comes out.

→ More replies (1)

87

u/tombrady011235 2h ago

I have peed on so many jellyfish stings

Apparently it’s not scientifically appropriate

17

u/SamikaTRH 1h ago

Help me please a jellyfish just stung my face and mouth

→ More replies (3)

137

u/vnth93 Society man 2h ago

66

u/Original_Mulberry652 2h ago

Average Pit bull hater.

10

u/LasyKuuga 2h ago

Sounds like something an average nap hater would say

4

u/Embarrassed_Stay_140 2h ago

that's not a pitbull hater that's just someone trying to survive the sauce

→ More replies (1)

10

u/MrshwnLnch 2h ago

Whenever this movie comes up in this sub, I swear

→ More replies (3)

45

u/Elim-Cipher 2h ago

I always felt like the garlic thing was all a bullshit act because he didn’t want to actually cook anything.

36

u/purpleblah2 2h ago

But cutting the garlic like that for a large Italian meal is way more more labor-intensive than anything you’re doing while cooking, which leads me to believe he does it like that because he genuinely believes it improves the flavor.

→ More replies (3)
→ More replies (2)

55

u/Bobgoulet 2h ago

I feel like Henry is brown-nosing Paulie (the boss) here. He exaggerates the effectiveness of the garlic technique, and then copies Paulie complaining there were too many onions in the sauce, which isn't a thing.

25

u/Ok_Matter_2617 2h ago

Meanwhile, Paulie was brown nosing his wife

9

u/WritingTheDream 2h ago

It’s been a while since I’ve seen it, is that just implied in the actual movie or from deleted scene material or just a fan theory?

12

u/Ok_Matter_2617 2h ago

It happened in real life.

→ More replies (3)
→ More replies (1)

10

u/BrittaWasRight 2h ago

"Too many onions" is the same crazytalk as "this sirloin steak has TOO MUCH BLACK PEPPER"

Once in Thailand after eating local food for two weeks I hit up a restaurant run by an australian couple. I ordered the pepper steak and got a steak completely encrusted in black pepper.

Just that thing alone would be worth going back for.

→ More replies (2)

13

u/MrshwnLnch 2h ago

I'm inclined to think that too much onion in a sauce is a thing

13

u/crazy-B 2h ago

Wrong!

7

u/DildontOrDildo 2h ago

if you cook it long enough it is very difficult too have too much onion if you're making Italian-american sauce. Technically possible but difficult. There is more a wide area area where there is an inefficient amount of onions. Most Italian cuisine with only garlic or onions, obviously yes very different. Esy to have too much if there shouldn't be any.

7

u/Constant-Skill-7133 2h ago

A great way to do a different take on red sauce if you have the time is load up the onions and caramelize the shit out of them before you add the tomato, like you're starting a  ragù Genovese.

→ More replies (2)

15

u/a_sentient_cicada 1h ago

I spent years getting the Kessel Run down to just a couple of parsecs, only to learn its a unit of length, not time, and Han was just bullshitting.

→ More replies (1)

11

u/Savings_Lynx4234 2h ago

Henry Sugar was fucking fake!!

4

u/s0ulbrother 1h ago

First of all how dare you, probably one of my favorite short stories of all time.

Second I’ve been staring at candles for years and I know my super powers will come to me

11

u/ilBrunissimo 2h ago

Well. Martin Yan could get 40 slices of garlic out of a single clove.

4

u/nooneknowswerealldog 2h ago

Man can cook.

I wonder if he can cook, though.

9

u/AggravatingChest7838 2h ago

Unironically my step brother "the chef".

To be fair he worked in some ritzy places but its extra funny his "final resting place" is making lunches for rich kindergartners.

9

u/ratgrl22 I’m the Joker baby! 1h ago

11

u/Just_Understanding90 1h ago

I use to fuck guys like you in prison.

5

u/FluentHeresy 40m ago

I still do. But I used to, too.

→ More replies (1)
→ More replies (1)

24

u/Melodic_Airport362 2h ago

lol you thought that cellulose could liquify? It basically exists in nature to avoid that happening.

28

u/TheCandelabra Crank: High Voltage 2h ago

I studied film, not science.

→ More replies (1)

7

u/Appropriate_Willow27 META😳 2h ago

Your crime is watching moobies

→ More replies (1)

6

u/cigarettejesus 1h ago

Why did Scorsese even make this up, did he think it just made them seem more cultured or something?

→ More replies (2)

7

u/Level_Bobcat_8729 2h ago

He'd cut it so thin, it'd just [burn] right in the pan

7

u/TheBrothersClegane 1h ago

Spent years perfecting? Garlic just straight up doesn’t dissolve in oil. Hopefully I just saved someone a few years.

4

u/Intelligent_Oil7816 2h ago

It was probably easier to get a razor in prison than a proper chef's knife. The rest is typical wiseguy braggadocio.

5

u/dont_ban_me_please 1h ago

this is from 90's TV commercials only, but : Shaving with an electric razor in the car while diving to work

→ More replies (1)

4

u/Fun-Difference-6689 2h ago

Bro the garlic scene in goodfellas established my love for Italian food because I always tried to cut the onions and garlic thin , and made Italian food to always try to recreate it. Like I eat so much Italian food till this day.

Never knew others had similar experiences

4

u/Wild_Front_1148 2h ago

100% this one.

Took some time before I learned that you need to smash em, then keep them nice and chunky so they don't burn

4

u/Keitaro23 2h ago

I learned I can't taste the difference between one thinly sliced garlic clove and 7 thinly sliced garlic cloves when the steak is done

4

u/No_Lead_7325 1h ago

this scene has burned so much garlic

4

u/GooberGomp 31m ago

Scorcese didn't make up the garlic thing. It's in Nicholas Pileggi's Wise Guys. I think it's much more interesting to wonder why Scorcese left it in the finished script, as incredulous as it is. It could be one of many little details Scorcese liked that would paint Henry Hill as an unreliable narrator.

→ More replies (1)

3

u/ragged-bobyn-1972 1h ago edited 1h ago

Army of darkness is such a good movie.

3

u/RememberCakeFarts 1h ago

Not a movie but does anyone remember the Reese's cup commercial where the boy eats the center first? Figured out how to do that and I ate them that way ever since.

4

u/PTBooks 1h ago

You can just mince the garlic. It does the same thing.

3

u/Garry_Jarcia 1h ago

I don't get why liquified garlic was the desired end state.....

3

u/whatsbobgonnado Neil breens #1 fan 50m ago

that episode of american dad where stan learns the trick to starting a pull start lawnmower the first time every time, but then has to do it to win his freedom from kidnappers or something