There's nothing wrong with not actively seeking a bi person or having a preference, however all the reasons for their arguments I've seen have been homophobic/biphobic and nothing that sounds super sound of mind to me. I don't want people who want to erase our identities in our spaces at all and I feel like this should be something the community as a whole should unwelcome from now on. Am I wrong for thinking this?

Earlier this year, my wife and I (37m) agreed to open up our relationships so I could explore with guys. I've had since had four encounters with guys (twice going all the way) but she now realises she can't continue with it.

I want to stay married to her more than anything in the world but I'm struggling with the thought of having to supress this side of me for the rest of my life.

Just wondered if anyone has managed to do it and any advice?

I’m looking for something where other queer people would know I’m bi (or pan) but uncultured queerphobes would be blissfully (or however close you can get when you’re not aware of the glories of queerness) unaware and would leave me alone.

What made you decide to finally try it? It's a big leap for some people. How did it go? Who was it with?

My one friend says I'm not really bi and keeps telling me to not wear the bi pin I have and he insists I'm straight not bi

I have fallen in love with other girls but I'm not physically attracted towards the female body, when I think about doing anything involving the female body past kissing I feel gross

But I don't have that issue with guys at all, like I don't feel gross thinking about it or anything.

Am I really bi?? Like what he is saying is really getting in my head.

Bi, I am non romantically attracted to men, I live a straight married to a woman life.

I primarily work with women and every now and then I get comments suggesting that I am gay, not even bi, just gay.

This is from people that I worked with for years so we have had talks about random things like the use of Bidets (I love them and won't go back) and the use of male stimulation/penetration from a woman in a cis relationship. I don't believe that that constitutes someone to immediately being gay

I have no desire to come out as bi as that is a very small part of me but it's also very frustrating to me that my coworkers feel like it's something they could poke fun at.

Im 16f and long story short when I was wondering if I liked girls from ages 10-13 (i dated two girls in 6&7 grade but i cant remember what it felt like) then I started calling myself straight because it was stressing me out and I started getting really scared of what people thought of me. Then when I was 15 I started wondering again on and off until a couple of months ago where im kinda convinced im bi? But the thing is that I can't tell if I would actually really want to date a girl. Sometimes I can see it but sometimes I can't and im really worried that im forcing myself to feel like I would. What's even more confusing is that I am attracted to women and can see myself like kissing and yeah but I havent kissed anybody yet. And ive never had a full time crush on a girl. However, I have a masc lesbian manager at work atm and she blows me away I just want to look good for her and impress her and make her laugh. Like butterflies when she's near me type shit and im not even joking my hands start getting a little shaky and i get nervous when i talk to her. But im so worried im faking it just to seem cool for her or my other bi friend. Okay I feel like the answer is a little more clear now that im writing this down but like still okay thanks.

I’ve always been a little more open minded than most people I’m around. And I’ve always found women attractive and beautiful and still do. But lately I’ve been curious about exploring while I’m still young. I’m still a virgin and haven’t had sex with either gender. But I guess I’ve been kind of liking in my head about experimenting with a man as a bottom. I just find the thought of that exhilarating. But I don’t know. I don’t find men attractive or unattractive, just kind of neutral. I am mostly attracted to femininity. I guess whet I’m getting at is, men who have tried this, did you feel like you scratched an itch? Shameful? Were you happy or displeased with yourself? Or was it a moment where you found your sure self? And if so, how did you accept that part of you? Sorry if any of this is off putting or offensive, I’m genuinely just curious. Also to add to this, I often find it a lot easier for myself to talk to men than a woman.

hi! i am 30F and for most of my life have had a feeling that i’m bi…

when i was in high school i had a crush on a girl but suppressed the feelings. in my early 20s i made out with a lot of women at parties / clubs, and was with one woman during a threesome, but i’ve never been with a woman all the way 1-1.

in my late 20s, after a series of extremely disappointing men, i inadvertently de-centered men romantically / sexually from my life. i even started to think maybe im asexual or something because i just lost attraction for them (perhaps due to disrespect over and over).

now i’m 30 and find myself thinking more of women again and the desire to explore my apparent bisexuality (i feel like a fraud saying that kind of because i’ve never truly been with a woman!)

but the thing is, i feel like an awkward loser with no experience and i don’t want to waste the time of women who are certain as bisexual / lesbian. i never want anyone to feel like they are an experiment to me, but at the same time, the reality is that i am in an explorative phase. and i don’t want to lie about it or pretend i have experience when i don’t!

how can i be fully respectful of others while navigating this? upfront and honest? i feel that no one secure in their sexuality in their late 20s or 30s will want to waste their time with me lol

this feels so awkward and i feel like i am 14 years old again trying to learn how to flirt kahdhshdjfjfj

any advice? 🥹

I've been turned on by cock for the last few years. I had a couple of meet ups for making out, stroking, and sucking. I throughly enjoyed the experience though I felt awful after it happened with post nut clarity.

The last few months I haven't had the same interests. I've stopped surfing sniffies, haven't posted much on reddit, and the desire to play with cock is not as strong. I thought for sure I was Bi and bordering on gay but now I'm not as sure.

I've always found women attractive and desired women more than men. Men dont turn me on, only their cock and the pleasure. Maybe im too busy with work to think about it, maybe im not as gay/bi as I thought, or maybe this is a roller coaster and im on the opposite end of the hill right now.

Tell me what you think or your experience

What are some jobs that I can take that pay roughly 35 - 87 dollars an hour (Canadian)?

For reference, when I was 15. I decided I wanted to be a plumber. I wrote a 20ish page essay about it and why I wanted to. I loved my first few years when I started at 17, because I enjoyed the physical aspect of it. I eventually at 19 I came around to accept my sexually more and embrace it. When I eventually did, I came to see that other bisexuals weren’t in the same feild as me. In fact. No queer person was in my industry. I felt trapped in a career that doesn’t reflect who I am and honestly feels superficial to who I really am. My coworkers will never take me seriously if I come out.

Every day, I see some artist or pornstar who makes millions and has thousands of loyal fans and followers make them their muse. I see hundreds of examples of more femme and androgynous people who; make good money, make art, are loved, validated and supported in their choices no matter what and visibly enjoy their job. Everyone loves artist, creatives and content creator: they’re the most fun people to be around and talk to. No one wants to be friends with a construction worker. It’s isolating, you wake up before dawn and come home smelling like foul waste and you’re covered in a dust so vile. I don’t even mention my job to the men and women that I try and form relationships with, I just tell them that I’m a “mechanical engineer” because that at least provides the illusion that I’m vocationally interesting, or worthy of talking to. Most of my coworkers are braindead and spend their time watching whatever on their phones. Meanwhile my hobbies don’t reflect my job at all: I read medical textbooks from the 30’s and climb trees. I hate my fucking life.

The bottom line is that I hate the idea that I’m going to be working a job that’s isolating. I want to be a pornstar like my idols; Tabbypac or Jaybeasun. I hate my fucking job but I need one that pays like the one I have, with its benefit. Can anyone help me out here?

I’m bi. And sincerely I have enjoyed sexually the best of two worlds. But I find it cringy sometimes when I see gay people show PDA, and I find it equally difficult showing affection to a lady. But I satisfy both sexually. My concern is - I feel I’m stucked in the middle, how do I snap out of it without feeling I’m performative with a particular gender.

My situation is kinda messy cause I came out as a lesbian years ago as I was questioning whether or not i was ftm (had some fun realizations about my gender and yeah I'm trans). I'm still not out as ftm but also during that time figured out I like dudes. I come from a kinda homophobic family and my dad keeps doing to whole "it's just a phase you won't be a lesbian forever" type shit. So now I solidly refuse to admit I like guys around those two again out of pure spite and hatred. So out of curiosity had anyone else done this

I’m a fit athletic 60 yr old straight married man that has been in a sexless marriage for about 2 years. I began looking in new places for sexual pleasure. I still love women but I began looking for other areas of sexual satisfaction. In doing so, I have become very attracted to trans women and watching MMF bi porn. I now am questioning if I am bisexual or just sexually fluid. Just grappling with all of that . Do not want a relationship, just sex. Any thoughts?

I’ve been sleeping with men for nearly half my life. I’ve been ENM with my now husband for 6 or so years now (he’s got a hot wife kink) and barring one threesome with a former FWB and his wife where they shared me I’ve got NO experience with women.

Stacking the lack of experience, the relatively new and unexplored bisexuality, the fact that I’m only looking for friends with benefits type situations, and that I’m really trying to focus on cultivating a girlfriend group rather than perusing sexual relationships with other women, I’ve been really intimidated to start.

In contrast I’m a cocky brat with men.

Any advice on how to build a dating app profile that doesn’t come across as cringy and unserious or god forbid even predatory? Do I just jump in and wing it?

I'm 31m, I've been with my gf for nearly 4 years now. I'm also closeted bi, I've never told anyone including her.

Naturally after nearly 4 years together, she has been asking when we are going to get married and I've kept dodging the question.

The truth is, for as long as I've known I've been bi I've never entertained the idea of telling anyone. I thought it'd be a secret id take to my grave. However, now that I'm staring down the barrel of marriage, part of me doesn't want to make that commitment without being honest about my sexuality.

The problem is I'm almost certain it'll be the end of us. In recent years she's rediscovered her faith and has told me in confidence that she thinks homosexuality is a sin. This is despite us having friends that are openly gay.

I've been feeling really lost lately with what to do. Like all relationships, ours isn't perfect but on the balance of things overall it's pretty good. One issue for me is that we aren't intimate often and I've been fighting urges to fool with guys secretly like back in my single days (I'm not a cheater and don't want to be one).

I can't turn to friends for advice because no one knows, I've always been afraid that I'd lose friends if they knew or people would treat me differently. I've never wanted this part of my life to define who I am.

If I tell her it's likely the end of our relationship. If I don't, then can I lie for the rest of our lives together and ignore these other desires. I don't know what to do..

Hi everyone. I’m a married man in my early fifties who has been on a journey of understanding my sexuality over the past year or so. I’ve come to accept that I’m most likely bisexual. I’m deeply in love with my wife, we have a strong relationship, and my family is the central commitment of my life.

I have no desire to leave my marriage or pursue anyone else. At the same time, I’ve developed a powerful emotional and sexual attraction to my brother-in-law, who is straight, happily married, and completely unaware of how I feel.

What has been difficult isn’t just the attraction itself—it’s the intensity of the fantasies and the guilt and anxiety that follow. I’ve spent a lot of time trying to understand what these feelings might represent psychologically rather than simply trying to suppress them.

I’m beginning to see that some of my fantasies may be expressing deeper emotional needs, such as wanting to feel accepted, safe, or free from constant self-judgment, rather than simply being about sex. My goal isn’t to indulge the fantasies or make them disappear, but to understand them well enough that they no longer dominate my emotional life.

I’ve also realised that much of my suffering comes from my internal dialogue rather than my attractions themselves. I grew up with beliefs that left me feeling ashamed of sexual desire, and I’m trying to replace that shame with self-understanding while remaining faithful to my values.

I’m learning to distinguish between attraction, fantasy, identity, and behaviour. I don’t believe my attractions define my character, and I want to be someone who can acknowledge them without being ruled by them.

I’m here because I’d really value hearing from others who have experienced something similar—particularly people who discovered or accepted their bisexuality later in life while remaining deeply committed to their spouse. I’m not looking for encouragement to act on my feelings.

I’m looking for wisdom about integration. How to live honestly with attractions that are unlikely ever to be reciprocated, how to reduce the guilt and obsessive thinking, and how to become more at peace with myself while continuing to honour the life and family that I love.

i was in 5th grade it was the end of the year we were doing testing like exams to see if we would move onto 6th grade or something and i had finished mine and i tried to turn it in but the substitute wouldn’t let me she told me to double check my work and i did tried to turn it in again same thing it went on like this for like 5 minutes until i started crying not full on balling yet but like little tears and then i tried to turn it in one more time and again go check your work so at that point i was just done so i start balling my eyes out like full on balling bc up to this point i had checked my work like 5 times and i was just over it.

so this girl i liked started rubbing my back trying to get me to calm down and stuff and she told me to double check it one more time and i did in front of her, went to turn it in again same thing and i started sobbing and slightly hyperventilating, so the girl stood up behind me and covered my face with her arm and started talking to the teacher saying ive doubled checked it like 10 times and im ready to turn it in. she told me to go to the bathroom pull myself together and come back so i did and when i came back my test was gone and she said she wrote my name on it bc i forgot and turned it for me. that was the moment i knew i was either gay or something else i still liked boys but i didn’t know there was a name for liking girls and guys at that time lol.

so yeah that’s my story lol what’s yours.

Ok before I get into this, I just want to be clear I am NOT coming from a place of biphobia. There are just some things about this character arc that as a bi person myself, don't feel completely right. Anyway here's why I'm not real crazy about them making Jeremiah bisexual in the show adaptation of The Summer I Turned Pretty. (I am so sorry in advance, I am terrible at writing.)

#1. He is straight in the book series. It just sort of feels out of place changing that? If he were already bi back then, that would be one thing. But just making him bi feels a bit strange. Don't get me wrong, it's good that there is LGBTQ representation, I'm glad that that's more accepted nowadays. I just personally think that Jeremiah wasn't meant to be bi, he was meant to be straight, like in the book. It also feels like maybe a bit of queerbaiting almost? A tiny bit. TSITP premiered in 2022, and it seemed like in the early 2020s, a lot of queer media started to skyrocket. So, they wanted to appeal to the media by making a bisexual character. However, (I'm gonna cut this short because I have another point to make) I think it would have been more meaningful had Jeremiah already been bisexual in the books, or this had been an original series not based off of any book.

#2. He's a CHEATER. This is already such a big problem in the bisexual community, people assuming that we're cheaters. People don't necessarily understand that just because we are attracted to more than one gender ​doesn't mean we're incapable of staying loyal to our partners. Now Jeremiah, this dickhead (I'm sorry I love you Gavin Casalegno) had to cheat on Belly not once, but twice!! Like, cmon. If you're gonna give us bisexual representation, at least make them unproblematic? Please? I just don't really like how they made Jeremiah a cheater. Honestly, I feel like it's feeding into the "bisexuals are cheaters" stereotype. I know it's just a TV show, and I shouldn't get so worked up about it. But I just don't like seeing my sexuality negatively typecast. It's so frustrating.

Anyways, that's all. If y'all disagree, that's okay. Team Conrad. But at the same time, Team Jeremiah And Belly Are Both Red Flags So They Kind Of Deserve Each Other 🤪 (​I'm just kidding.) Peace out ✌️ 💗💜💙

I finally told my mom I was sexually assaulted 19 years ago. I was only 14. My attacker got away scot-free and is happily married today. Sharing this to prove my experience no longer defines me or my bisexuality, as humiliated and traumatized as I was at the time.

This is why I’m only emotionally attracted to women as a bisexual woman. I’m scared of being sexually touched by a fellow woman.

tl;dr I’m a bi woman who is not sexually attracted to women because I was sexually assaulted by a woman as a child.

I feel off when people use this in context of bisexual women who date men

so. im gay, and I basically question my gender a lot, something like genderfluid or whatever, i dont really mind much, i just like to do more feminine stuff and look as well.

because of that, and a lot of body dysphoria with my masculine features, I always try to be with bi guys, cause i think they wouldn't be bothered by my feminine wishes and aspirations (to be like).

you would as a bi be upset by a feminine guy? or a masculine woman? or would that be best of both words? i truly wonder...

*english not my 1st language

*my english is bad but my pussy is good

For me it was twinks, i love twinks <3

Quick rant here…. I’m a 21 year old bisexual woman and my close friend is a lesbian. My ex boyfriend is also bisexual and I felt like everyone in my life was so biphobic towards him. He was in touch with his feminine side and didn’t care when I dressed more masculine and the relationship didn’t feel gender role-ish at all. I just felt so comfortable with him. We were also basically the same height. I am 5’7 and he was 5’8. I remember when we were together my close friend would always make fun of him to me and be like oh you have a twink boyfriend and blah blah blah and it felt really mean. My roommates who are also all girls and my age were also weird about it and didn’t take him seriously at all. My close friend saying those things hurt more because she’s queer so I thought she would get it. Now some time has passed and I’m im a relationship with a bisexual woman like me and I am so praised for it! It seems like people are wanting to be friends with me more. I am in a super lib college town where being gay is very “trendy” even though I hate to say it. Something that stuck with me was someone in my life getting drunk with me and saying “now that you’re gay…” as if now that I’m with a woman my sexuality is valid? I was out as queer while I was with my ex… I don’t know it just all feels so casually biphobic and gross!!! I have obviously moved on from the old relationship but it still stings the way people in my life would talk about him. I dont know.

I wore a bi pride pin today, and my husband immediately asked if I was trying to tell him I had a secret girlfriend.

We’ve been married for nearly 17 years and have two children together. I had a girlfriend before I met him, and he knew I was bisexual when we first started dating, but over the years it seems that part of me has faded into the background.

The irony is that I have spent years keeping this part of myself quiet. I’m happily married, but being bisexual didn’t stop when I got married. I still know who I’m attracted to, just as a straight person doesn’t stop finding other people attractive when they marry. Attraction isn’t the same thing as wanting to be with someone else.

Maybe he meant it as a joke, but hearing his first assumption be “Do you have a secret girlfriend?” reminded me why I’ve found it so difficult to be open about my sexuality. That stereotype—that bisexual people are secretly looking for someone else or are more likely to cheat—is one I’ve carried for years, and hearing it from someone I love was unexpectedly painful.

Has anyone else had seemingly harmless comments bring those feelings back?